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Author Topic: Ghaji Greenswoop / Llaoihrr Brownie / Skydiver Clan  (Read 5348 times)
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Ghaji Greenswoop
The Green Fox
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Posts: 30


Brownie, Llaoihrr


« on: February 13, 2008, 03:32:42 AM »



Name: Ghaji Greenswoop

Gender: Male

Age: 30 yrs

Race: Brownie

Tribe: Llaoihrr Brownie, Skydiver Clan

Occupation: Sky warrior, spy

Title: Sky Swoop

Height: 16 nailsbreaths

Weight: A little over 1 od

Eye Color: Sognastheen Green

Hair Color: Sognastheen Green

Overview

Ghaji Greenswoop, so nicknamed by humans due to his green colored skin and hair and his cunning owl mount, Kweeuu. Ghaji is a tough, take no nonsense Brownie of the Llaoihrr clan. He is temperamental, serious and loves his owl mount more than life itself. Ghaji is an adventurous hunter and warrior who takes wild risks and is not afraid to venture into lands unknown. He is a proficient fighter and has a keen understanding of the wilds.

Physical Appearance

Green. Very sognastheen green. One could stand within a nailsbreadths of Ghaji in a field of green grass and never see him. Ghaji is a trim, lean Brownie, standing about 16 nailsbreadths high. His dark green hair is shoulder length, which he wears tied back with a piece of mouse leather. His skin is a bit lighter shade of green than his hair. He also possesses deep brown eyes and a thin mouth that flashes an infectious toothy grin that never seems to go away.

His legs are powerful and long and always in constant motion - whether walking, running or leaping smoothly over roots and rocks in search of prey. His years of warrior training has honed his body into a wiry, tight and agile warrior who is like a spring ready to snap. His arms are lean and his hands are always gripping some kind of weapon as if the weapon were an extension of his own body (and to him, in a way, it is). He possesses no outstanding scars, marks or tattoos anywhere on his body.

Clothing

Ghaji prefers to wear darker clothing, usually the heavier skin of the male Whiptongue lizard. Over his upper body, he wears a vest of lizard skin leather, tied along the front with fox hair. The tougher lizard skin also possesses tiny spine-like scales that function as armor and protection from animals who would attempt to bite Ghaji. He leaves his arms exposed most of the time so as to give him greater range of motion. His leggings are made of black or brown rat leather, usually loose fitting for greater range of motion. His shoes are made of rat skin leather, being thicker on the heel and sole as he has been known to wear out several pairs in short periods of time.

Upon his head he wears a helm made of mouse leather (usually the mouse head itself) along with the skin trailing down his back in a crude cloak covering. He has also been known to wear lizard skin cloaks but these are tougher to wear and do not move as freely as the skin is not as pliable as mouse/rat skin.

There are times when Ghaji will decorate his cloak with small feathers and beads, but only in the clan village or when celebrating a particularly tough hunt or battle. On the field, he wears practical clothing with no extras.

Personality

Ghaji is adventurous, playful and takes risks. He was always one to participate in the practical jokes and crude humor with his fellow clan members. Despite his often cavalier attitude, Ghaji is devoted to his duties, yet sometimes comes off as more than a little arrogant. He takes his job as a Skydiver with utmost seriousness and enjoys the risks involved with flying high upon his owl mount with the wind whipping through his hair and a bow taut and ready to fire off at distant prey.

Ghaji's mind is always in motion. He is always thinking of his next move and next tactic. The life of a soldier means everything to him and he makes sure that his priority in life is service to the clan. He is blunt in his dealings with others and wastes no time with idle talk. He speaks his mind and won't tolerate excuses. Among friends, Ghaji is not afraid to let loose and enjoy some of life's finer pleasures such as girls (Brownie girls of course), human ale (in tiny amounts) and a little thievery on the side.

When in the company of animals, Ghaji feels that he can be himself. He is often heard speaking to his mount, a gray owl named Kweeuu, and often the owl will click or hoot in response. He has always had a love for birds and flight and developed a rudimentary form of communication with the clan's birds. Ghaji will bark, yip or make clicking sounds with the animals as if expecting them to respond - and sometimes they do!

When on the hunt or in battle, Ghaji becomes a fierce fighter who frequently risks his life against overwhelming odds. It seems he is only happy when in the midst of battle sitting astride Kweeuu. His war cries can be heard many peds away as he swoops down into battle astride his owl. Ghaji regularly trains hard to hone his battle skill and as such he has excelled in many areas of Skydiver combat. This sometimes means he gets arrogant and cocky in his ways and he won't hesitate to announce his latest feat of daring and bravery to all who would listen.

Ghaji feels a constant energy within him that never seems to rest. He has a difficult time sleeping most days (he is a night Brownie who sleeps days and hunts and fights at night because he feels that the darkness can better hide his movements and because his mount, Kweeuu, is also nocturnal). He is possessed of a restless energy that serve him well in his job but hinders him during times of peace.

Strengths

 - Proficient with the bow and arrow. He carries a quiver of arrows upon his back at all times and a longbow tucked on his back also. His bare arms enable him to reach back and grip an arrow quickly and fire it off. As with most Skydiver aerial fighters, he is proficient with simultaneously riding his mount at high speeds and firing his bow at targets.

- Proficient with the blowpipe. Another Brownie weapon he was taught was the blowpipe. Although Ghaji feels that the blowpipe is not as useful as a bow, as his arm can string a bow and fire an arrow for a greater distance that his lungs can blow a dart, he nevertheless knows that this particular ranged weapon has its uses when in a tight or laying down position where a bow is not as effective.

 - Proficient with poisons. Ghaji was taught how to use poisons effectively in order to increase the potency of his fighting skills. For some larger enemies, a Brownie bow or dart would do little damage. Coating the tips of arrows and darts with poison adds another offensive method to kill enemies.

- Fletcher skill. Ghaji can make his own arrows and darts. By using pieces of wood, feathers, fox hair and sharp bits of stone, Ghaji can produce spare ammunition. However, the downside is that using such materials in the wild tends to produce less quality arrows and darts as opposed to having them made by a professional fletcher.

 - His owl Kweeuu. Ghaji's owl mount is his most powerful and useful of all his "weapons". Kweeuu functions as his mount for fast travel, his backup when in a fight, a second pair of eyes to look for danger (or a second nose and pair of ears) and keeps him warm on cold nights. Kweeuu functions best during the evening and night hours as he is a nocturnal creature. Ghaji has trained him to function during daylight hours if need be, but most of their hunting is done at night.

Weaknesses

- Small size. As a Brownie, he is small in comparison to the larger races and he must always be cautious when around larger animals and/or people. He is careful never to walk alone amongst the larger races and always tries to find higher ground when traveling amongst big people places.

- Arrogant. Ghaji trains hard and excels in many areas of Skydiver combat. As such, he can become arrogant and cocky in his abilities and doesn't hesitate to boast of his accomplishments to all who would listen. His teachers know that someday, Ghaji's pride will be his downfall.

- Poor knowledge of Tharian. Now that Ghaji has left the safety and comfort of the Vale, he seeks others with which to associate with and a new way in life. As such, he has gone in search of the Big People lands but he has very little knowledge of Tharian with which to communicate with the humans. He relies on hand signals and even drawing crude pictures to communicate with the big people which can lead to frustration for both parties.

- Impulsive - Rushing headlong into battle is never wise, yet when Ghaji is ready to fight and his spirit longs for the kill, he rides into the midst of combat with his bow leading the charge. He weighs his chances and develops a rudimentary strategy but before he knows it, he is charging headlong into a fight and lets his instincts guide him.

- Girls. Ghaji attracts the attention of the females and he adores their attention. While this is healthy, if there was one thing that will get him off track is a female. Nothing derails his focus more than if he is having relationship trouble with a girl or he is thinking of ways to impress one of them. If a girl is watching him practice maneuvers, he'll go out of his way to attempt the more dangerous, reckless maneuvers and has sometimes endangered his own comrades as a result.

History

Birth.

Ghaji Greenswoop was born in the Vale on the 16th of Singing Bird, to a tough and rugged Skydiver clan father and a gentle, intelligent Ferretmaster mother. Ghaji was the youngest son of three children (two older sisters) born (at the same time) to the happy couple and from the time he was born, his parents introduced their children to the various animals and birds of the Skydiver and Ferretmaster clans. Ghaji's father was a respected scout in the Skydivers who held some measure of respect with the clan, but he was emotionally distant and spent more time with his owl steed away on patrol than with his young children. Ghaji's mother was devoted for a time but she too was distant and soon after her children were born, she would leave them to the care of various uncles and cousins while she was away on her own patrol. It would seem that the only time the parents truly connected with their children was when they were caring for the clan's animal mounts.

Young Adulthood.

Ghaji, like all Brownie children before the age of 15 years, was given to a "Cunner" for initial training in the basics of Brownie culture. Right away, Ghaji took a dislike to anything requiring patience such as reading and writing. He also displayed no interest in magic (yet one of his sisters enjoyed magic the most and the other sister loved reading and writing). He displayed a passing interest in herb lore, but only the poisonous and dangerous kinds of plants. His true love came during his first hunt for mice when he was eight years old. His tiny body was surprisingly agile and he was quick to learn the little blowdart pipes given to the youngsters for practice. He was overjoyed when he returned from his first hunt carrying a single baby mouse that he help root out from a hole while his teacher showed him how to use the blowpipe to kill it. He learned to skin the mouse and created his first cloak and leggings from the hides.

Also during this time, Ghaji developed a special love for the animals of the Ferretmaster and Skydiver clans. It was no secret that this interest caught the attention of his parents and he was soon to become the favorite of the family. Ghaji's sisters, while loved in their own way, never attained the relationship with their parents and a slow rift began to develop between them and their brother. While Ghaji was busy feeding and helping his parents tame animals, his sisters were frequently forced to fend for themselves among the other relatives. While they became successful in their own right, the family rift that developed was to remain for many more years.

Choosing Day

Choosing Day was a simple choice for Ghaji. Because of his family connections within the Ferretmaster and Skydiver clans, Ghaji was already well ahead of most children when it came to specialize in a clan. Without hesitation, Ghaji chose to take the test to join the clan of his mother, the Ferretmaster army.

First Mount

First, Ghaji was introduced to a mount. His first mount was a black ferret named Tik. Ghaji's mother had a white ferret mount and Ghaji was sure that he would develop the same relationship with Tik as his mother did to her mount. This was not to be. Ghaji found that Tik was slow and not aggressive enough for his liking. Ghaji did not tame Tik himself and he frequently was frustrated that the ferret didn't follow his orders as he wanted. Not only that, but the ferret was old and was a weak mount in practice battles. Soon after, Ghaji asked to retire the ferret and he chose a new mount.

Weapons Training

While Ghaji took his time choosing his mount, he undertook the first phase of weapons training. He was given a choice of possible weapons and he chose archery first. He enjoyed the bow as he found it to be a powerful ranged weapon and the process of making arrows soon became a favorite skill.

While Ghaji was mastering the bow and arrow, his next choice of weapons was the blowpipe. Ghaji liked the blowpipe, but he never found it as strong as the bow. Nevertheless, he discovered its usefulness when laying down aiming a shot or when in close quarters. Much like arrow making, he enjoyed making darts using various colored feathers and carvings on each dart.

Taming a Mount

Ghaji had been training for ten years with weapons and now it was time for him to choose a permanent mount. His drill master rode a grey fox that had recently had a litter of pups and Ghaji instantly came to love the fox pups. He also respected his drill master and asked if he could have a pup for a mount. He agreed and Ghaji took a fox pup for his own.

It took many months of taming, but eventually, Ghaji was able to befriend the fox and it became a loyal companion. However, taming and riding were two different things and the remaining years of his training consisted of mounted maneuvers and drills using his weapons while riding a swiftly moving young fox.

Ghaji named his new mount Kweeuu and he found that the fox was highly intelligent and its personality mirrored his own: reckless and aggressive yet shrewed and clever. Kweeuu rarely left Ghaji's side and Ghaji never left Kweeuu. He slept with the fox, ate with the fox (he helped it hunt for mice) and the two developed a communication style consisting of barks, yips, grunts, hisses and whining noises. Ghaji came to interpret the fox's various sounds and in turn the fox came to learn the commands from Ghaji using the noises.

Graduation

The proudest moment of Ghaji's career was his graduation from the clan apprenticeship. With his grey fox Kweeuu beside him, Ghaji was announced for candidacy to become an official soldier of the Ferretmaster clan. But first, he was to be given the final test.

Ghaji's drill master, now older in years, gave Ghaji the responsibility of leading a small group of his fellow comrades into the wilds to hunt a rather nasty red fox that had been plaguing the village. The red fox, believed to be sick with raging wild fever, was unable to be tamed and posed a threat to the village. Ghaji, his mount Kweeuu and two other Ferretmaster graduates-to-be were to embark alone and bring back the red fox's pelt as proof of their success. They were to live off the land and fight the red fox themselves with no assistance.

Early the next morning, Ghaji readied his his fox and gathered his weapons. He donned his special lizard skin armor and rat helm and cloak. He coated his arrows with poison and tucked the hunting knife in his boot. He stepped outside to find his comrades waiting for him - Hick, a ferret rider and Jolal, an elfcat rider. The three embarked on the hunt, eager to obtain the coveted right as a full Ferretmaster soldier.

The Hunt

Unbeknownst to the three young graduates, Ghaji's father secretly followed the three on his own mount, a brown owl named Kork. No one knew it, but Ghaji's father was afraid for his son and long harbored a secret. He almost failed his own graduation test due to his reckless behavior and had almost gotten himself and his comrades killed. That was many years ago, and his father had since had a productive life since then, but he saw alot of himself in his son and worried that the same thing would happen to Ghaji.

While Ghaji's father watched from high above, the three Ferretmaster graduates stalked the red fox in the forest. They had several encounters with wild beasts, mostly smaller ones such as rats and a few snakes. Ghaji's father was proud of how his son was progressing and was tempted to leave the three alone and fly home. That was when they spotted the red fox.

The red fox, snarling angrily, came leaping over the bushes to attack the three Brownies. Ghaji took charge and dispersed the group to surround the red fox. He fired off three arrows in rapid succession but missed two and landed one on the red fox's right leg. Furious, the red fox charged Ghaji and Kweeuu. The grey fox leapt to the right and behind a boulder.

Jolal took up her blowpipe and launched a single dart in the red foxs direction. However, her aim was too high and the dart landed in a bed of leaves nearby. Jolal blew another dart but the red fox managed to dodge and snap back at her with its jaws. Jolal and her mount backed away to find a better position.

Meanwhile, Hick, the ferret rider, moved his ferret atop a rock and blew several darts that hit the red fox squarely in the neck and back. That was when Ghaji came around and charged the red fox. With an arrow notched in his bow, Ghaji and Kweeuu came bounding down off the rock. The red fox turned to face the threat and leapt for him. Ghaji let loose an arrow that pierced the red fox's chest and the animal finally began to show some signs of backing down. The red fox swiped at Kweeuu and Ghaji was jerked backwards by his mounts attempt to duck the blow. Ghaji fell off his mount and landed hard on the ground, striking his head against a tree root.

Jolal and Hick renewed their attack, seeing that Ghaji was down. The red fox turned their attention on the remaining two Brownies. The animal was weakened now, bleeding and fatigued. Ghaji stood up and shook the dizziness from his head. He readied another arrow while Kweeuu took a moment to distract the red fox. Kweeuu barked loudly, catching the red foxs attention.

By now, angry and in pain, the red fox gained renewed aggression and had Jolal and Hick cornered against a boulder. Ghaji fired an arrow that pierced the foxs left ear while Kweeuu snapped at the red foxs tail.

Suddenly, a cry was heard from above. Ghaji looked up and saw his father falling from high atop the tree. His owl mount was screeching desperately and glided down to catch its master. Utterly shocked, Ghaji momentarily forgot about his companions and ran for his father. The red fox, now realizing that its main danger was gone, clawed Hick and bit the Brownie, shaking him furiously and tossing him a few peds away.

Jolal called for Ghaji's help, but he ignored her pleas and ran for his father. He found his father laying atop a pile of leaves, clutching his heart. The old man had died suddenly, Ghaji realized. But what was he doing here? Kork the owl landed beside them, cooing in despair. Ghaji cried out, confused and saddened to see his father now dead.

Then, a scream. Coming to his senses, Ghaji realized he had left his comrades alone with the red fox! He rushed back to find the red fox finishing off Jolal and her elfcat. Now enraged, and not caring about his own safety, Ghaji picked up one of his comrade's fallen spears and charged. Kweeuu also attacked, latching a bite on the back of the red foxs neck. The next few moments were a blur as the Brownie and his mount brought down the injured red fox. In the end, Ghaji had a broken spear, no arrows and a lost dagger. He also was victorious in killing the red fox. But, sadly, he lost both of the comrades he was charged with keeping and had to contend with the mysterious death of his father.

Aftermath

Upon returning home, the cheering of the village turned to cries of sadness as only one Brownie returned. Ghaji told of the hunt and what had happened. The drill master, Ghaji's mother and the Clan of Elders gathered around to pronounce judgment.

Because of his failure, Ghaji was denied membership of the Ferretmaster clan. The safety of his comrades should have come first, the drill master said, and Ghaji has left them in harm's way. He failed his duty as a leader and as a fellow soldier.

Ghaji, his dream of joining the Ferretmaster army now shattered, and the loss of his father and friends, found no reason to stay in the clan. He had no interest in apprenticing to any other clan. The Ferretmaster army was his only love and now it was gone. Although he had the option of taking the test again, he felt too disgraced and saddened to ever try again. He needed time alone to think on his future.

Ghaji then decided that it was time to leave the clan and embark on a different kind of journey. He would enter the world and search for a new life. Perhaps find another Brownie clan with which to join and live. So one night, he mounted his fox, claimed some new weapons, and left the Vale for good.

Familiar

Kweeuu is Ghaji's grey fox companion, mount and friend. Raised since he was a pup, Ghaji has kept and cared for Kweeuu and established a close relationship with the fox. Kweeuu is now a young adult, approximately five years old. He is medium sized, smaller than a red fox, but more aggressive and Kweeuu has the ability to climb trees to escape enemies. Ghaji also prefers Kweeuu because the fox is nocturnal and so is Ghaji.

Kweeuu is mostly grey in color, with black color mixed in, along the top of his back from neck to tail. His belly is white and under his neck is a mix of ruddy red and black coloration. The tip of Kweeuu's bushy tail is black.

Kweeuu is aggressive in combat and attacks by using quick snapping bites. His jaws are not as powerful and as such he cannot hold a larger enemy for long. His quick bites enable him to bite and move and bite again and move. Kweeuu's strengths are speed and agility. Like most of his species, Kweeuu can climb trees to escape enemies and can walk along thick branches. Although grey foxes are naturally nocturnal, Ghaji has trained the fox to function in both daylight and nighttime hours.

Ghaji does not use any kind of saddle on his mount. He prefers a simple harness with which to hold and help direct Kweeuu, but otherwise he rides on Kweeuu's back.

Weapons

 - A longbow with a collection of arrows in a quiver
 - A single hunting knife tucked in his boot
 - A blowpipe and poisoned darts

Belongings

Knapsack containing herbs for poison making, bow strings and feathers for arrow and dart making, and bundles of horsehair.
« Last Edit: March 12, 2009, 12:57:25 AM by Ghaji Greenfox » Logged

"Professional rat hunter."
 The Green Fox
Miaria Arbol
New Santharian

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Gender: Female
Posts: 7


Miaria Arbol, Elf


« Reply #1 on: February 13, 2008, 04:34:57 AM »

I like him! HE sounds normal, and you do't get many normal people around here! I'm just wondering, how can he be a show off and a hater of idle talk at the same time? Also, am I aloud write here, or is it only Mods and Admins ???  buck  LOL
Good luck on it!
Logged

"Life is a window waiting to be opened, and to let its views astound you..."
Ghaji Greenswoop
The Green Fox
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Posts: 30


Brownie, Llaoihrr


« Reply #2 on: February 13, 2008, 05:10:23 AM »

Hi Miaria!

Thanks for the comments. I think anyone is free to comment, so its ok. If you see anything else, let me know.  :D
« Last Edit: February 13, 2008, 10:36:04 AM by Garm Greenbark » Logged

"Professional rat hunter."
 The Green Fox
Rookie Brownbark
Skydiver
Mini-mod
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Gender: Female
Posts: 1686


Brownie, Llaoihrr


« Reply #3 on: February 13, 2008, 07:05:17 PM »

Just had a quick glance, and I notice you're missing the last three sections - Belongings, Weapons and Familiar.

Edit : Well, I couldnt resist helping out another Llaoihirr Brownie, could I?  Welcome to Santharia.  I am not a mod and so you are quite free to not take my suggestions on board.

@Miaria:  Im not quite sure how a 15 nailsbreath-high green creature riding a fox qualifies as a normal person..LOL


Name: Garm Greenbark

Gender: Male

Age: 30 yrs

Race: Brownie

Tribe: Llaoihrr Brownie, Ferretmaster Clan

Occupation: Warrior, Hunter and Beastmaster

Title:

Height: 15 nailsbreaths

Weight: A little over 1 od

Eye Color: Dark Green

Hair Color: Dark Green

Physical Appearance

Green. Very green. One could stand within a nailsbreadths of Garm in a field of grass and never see him (well, surely that depends on the colour of the grass, I mean some is more brownish green :P  Maybe you could specify a particular type of Santharian grass?). Garm is a trim, lean Brownie, standing about 15 nailsbreadths high. His years of warrior training has ( have) honed his body into a wiry, tight and agile warrior who is like a spring ready to snap. His dark green hair is shoulder length, which he wears casually ( Im not sure what you mean by casually worn hair) around his thin shoulders. His skin is a lighter shade of green than his hair. He also possesses deep brown eyes and a thin mouth that rarely cracks a smile. His nose is small and thin to a tiny point.

His legs are powerful and long and always in constant motion - whether walking, running or leaping smoothly over roots and rocks in search of prey. His arms are lean and his hands are seemingly always gripping some kind of weapon as if the weapon were an extension of his own body (and to him, in a way, it is). He possesses no outstanding scars, marks or tattoos anywhere on his body.

Clothing

Garm prefers to wear darker clothing, usually the heavier skin of the male Whiptongue lizard. Over his upper body, he wears a vest of lizard skin leather, tied along the front with horse hair. The tougher lizard skin also possesses tiny spine-like scales that function as armor and protection from animals who would attempt to bite Garm. He leaves his arms exposed most of the time so as to give him greater range of motion. His leggings are made of black or brown rat leather, usually loose fitting for greater range of motion. Shoes as well are rat skin, thicker on the heel and sole as he has been known to go through several pairs due to wearing out.

Over his head he wears a helm made of mouse leather (usually the mouse head itself) along with skin trailing down his back in a crude cloak covering. He has also been known to wear lizard skin cloaks but these are tougher to wear and move freely (in) as the skin is not as pliable as mouse/rat skin.

There are times when Garm will decorate his cloak with small feathers and beads, but only in the clan village or when celebrating a particularly tough hunt or battle. On the field, he wears practical clothing with no extras.

Personality

Garm is a serious minded Brownie. Never one to participate in the practical jokes and humor of the other clan members, Garm is a serious, plain spoken young man ( hes not a man) who's devotion to duty is rigid and hard. He takes his job as a member of the Ferretmaster clan with utmost seriousness.

Garm's mind is always in motion. He is always thinking of his next move and next tactic. The life of a soldier means everything to him and he makes sure that his priority in life is service. He is blunt in his dealings with others and wastes no time with idle talk. He speaks his mind and won't tolerate excuses.

His stoic demeanor sometimes softens, however, when in the company of animals. Sometimes, a lucky Brownie will catch Garm speaking and smiling to his mount, a grey fox named Nis. He has a love for animals and speaks to the clan's ferrets, foxes and birds in a language known only to himself. Garm will bark, yip or make clicking sounds with the animals as if expecting them to respond - and sometimes they do! ( be aware that only the Eyelians can actually speak animal languages to the point where the animal understands them.  I dont think youre crossing that barrier here, just a role playing tip for the future)

When on the hunt or in battle, Garm becomes a fierce fighter who frequently risks his life against overwhelming odds. It seems he is only happy when in the midst of battle. ( This contradicts with his happiness around animals) His war cries can be heard many distances ( you could find a Santharian word to replace distances in the measures converter) away when he charges into battle with his mount Nis. Garm trains hard to hone his battle skill and as such he has excelled in many areas of Ferretmaster combat. This sometimes means he gets arrogant and cocky in his ways and he won't hesitate to announce his latest feat of daring and bravery to all who would listen. (and yet he is a serious, plain spoken young man who wastes no time with idle talk :P)

Garm feels a constant energy within him that never seems to rest. He has a difficult time sleeping most days (he is a night Brownie who sleeps days and hunts and fights at night ). (why?) He is possessed of a restless energy that serve him well in his job but hinders him during times of peace.

Strengths

 - Talented animal tamer. Not only did he tame his own mount in half the time it normally would take, (there is no mention of this in his history, and also I think it's too strong.  You are not just limited by your own skill, but the intelligence and friendliness of the animal, which won't change much from creature to creature.)  but he also assists in the taming of other animals for the clan. He specializes in the mammals such as ferrets, mice, shrews and foxes. By using his varied animal sounds, he can imitate calls and sounds of animals with uncanny accuracy. ( be aware that you are only really going to be able to tame a creature which is so much bigger than you if you are the one teaching it what to eat.  Otherwise it will see you as food.  So I wouldnt really say that Brownies actually tame animals they capture them young and then raise them and train them.  Taming implies you are taking a wild animal and training it.  Well to my mind.)

 - Proficient with the bow and arrow. He carries a bundle of arrows upon his back at all times and a longbow tucked on his back also. His bare arms enable him to reach back and grip an arrow quickly and fire it off. As with most Ferretmaster fighters, he is proficient with simultaneously riding his mount at high speeds and firing his bow at targets.

 - Proficient spearman. The spear is another of his weapon proficiencies. When fighting, he prefers to have a long range weapon with which to stab and move. He can also throw his spear like a javelin and hit with excellent accuracy.

 - Proficient knife fighter. The last weapon proficiency Garm possesses is with a dagger. Most Ferretmaster soldiers carry a small blade for close quarters fighting (Actually, only hunting knives are common and not just among the Ferretmaster Clan.  Brownies try to stay away from close quarters fighting if at all possible.) ,and Garm is no different. He possesses two daggers made of steel with mouse leather handles. (Llaohirr hunting knives are generally made of iron about the only things for which metal is used) He can dual wield them with excellent precision and tucks them into his boots when not in use. (I dont know where he learnt this but its not a Brownie skill)

 - Proficient with poisons. Although not required to learn the nature of poisons for war ( yes it is.  For the reasons you state below.  Also, the Brownies are not at war with anyone at the moment), Garm had little doubt that it was necessary to learn to use poisons effectively to be a deadly warrior. For some larger enemies, a Brownie bow or spear would do little damage. Coating the tips of arrows and spears with poison adds another offensive method to kill enemies.

Weaknesses

 - Arrogant. Garm trains hard and excels in many areas of Ferretmaster combat. As such, he can become arrogant and cocky in his abilities and doesn't hesitate to boast of his accomplishments to all who would listen. His teachers someday know that his pride will be his downfall.

 - Close minded. Garm will follow orders of his superior only and no one else. He has little tolerance for those who are not soldiers or fighters themselves. If it can't fight, he won't respect it. (So he doesnt respect the people who provide him with food?  Or the ones who have the skill to make far better poisons than him?  I think this needs explanation in your history, as its such a strange concept for a race who a) worship the spirits of nature, rock, trees etc, so respect the plants which feed them and b) live in a large communal tree where they can see how everyone is contributing to their whole survival.)

 - Weak eyesight. Garm has developed a sensitivity to sunlight due to his constant activity during the night. (I dont really see why he would always be working at night.  Creatures can attack the Brownie settlements at any time) He has a difficult time focusing with his eyes during the daylight hours and as such his battle prowess suffers if he has to fight during the day. He relies on Nis, his grey fox mount, to watch for danger or to lead the way traveling.

 - Reckless. With all his skill in battle and weapons, Garm nevertheless has difficulty thinking through sound tactics and instead would rush headlong into battle. He has been known to attack without sufficient reinforcements and to clash with an obviously stronger foe with no backup. (Again unbrownieish. They are cautious creatures who develop things like the blowpipe, bow and arrows, poisons etc so that they can stay away from their enemies.  Possible, but I would like to see an explanation of why in his history.) He doesn't need to prove himself to his comrades, but to him, proving his bravery is a must. More than once he has almost gotten killed due to his reckless behaviour. (again, in his personality you say he takes his job as a member of the Ferretmaster clan with utmost seriousness. And yet he is reckless about the dangers?)

 - Girls. Garm attracts the attention of the females and he adores their attention. While this is healthy, if there was one thing that will get him off track is a female. Nothing derails his focus more than if he is having relationship trouble with a girl or he is thinking of ways to impress one of them. If a girl is watching him practice maneuvers, he'll go out of his way to attempt the more dangerous, reckless maneuvers and has sometimes endangered his own comrades as a result.

(His strengths are all combat based whilst his weaknesses are mainly personality. Put in his tiny size as a weakness you are comparing him to the average human peasant after all.  This should even him up a little.  The other thing is that he seems to be concentrating on melee fighting, which seems rather un-brownieish to me.  They developed those poisons for a reason you know!  Your fox mount is a strength too, and needs to be added as such.)

History

Birth.

Garm Greenbark was born to a rugged, no-nonsense Skydiver clan father and a gentle, intelligent Ferretmaster mother. Garm was the youngest son of three children (two older sisters) born (at the same time) to the happy couple and from the time he was born, his parents introduced their children to the various animals and birds of the Skydiver and Ferretmaster clans. Garm's father was a respected soldier in the Skydivers who held some measure of respect with the clan, but he was emotionally distant and spent more time with his owl steed away on patrol than with his young children. Garm's mother was devoted for a time but she too was distant and soon after her children were born, she would leave them to the care of various uncles and cousins while she was away on her own patrol. It would seem that the only time the parents truly connected with their children was when they were caring for the clan's animal mounts.

Young Adulthood.

Garm, like all Brownie children before the age of 15 years, was given to a "Cunner" for initial training in the basics of Brownie culture. Right away, Garm took a dislike to anything requiring patience such as reading and writing. He also displayed no interest in magic (yet one of his sisters enjoyed magic the most and the other sister loved reading and writing). He displayed a passing interest in herb lore, but only the poisonous and dangerous kinds of plants. His true love came during his first hunt for mice when he was eight years old. His tiny body was surprisingly agile and he was quick to learn the little blowdart pipes given to the youngsters for practice. He was overjoyed when he returned from his first hunt carrying three baby mice that he rooted from a hole all by himself. (He would be lucky to hit just one on his first hunt, as he wouldnt know how the animals were going to act, would be unskilled in creeping up and probably not that proficient with a blowpipe yet either) He learned to skin the mice and created his first cloak and leggings from the hides.

Also during this time, Garm developed a special love for the animals of the Ferretmaster and Skydiver clans. It was no secret that this interest caught the attention of his parents and he was soon to become the favorite of the family. Garm's sisters, while loved in their own way, never attained the relationship with their parents and a slow rift began to develop between them and their brother. While Garm was busy feeding and helping his parents tame animals, his sisters were frequently forced to fend for themselves among the other relatives. While they became successful in their own right, the family rift that developed was to remain for many more years.

Choosing Day

Choosing Day was a simple choice for Garm. Because of his family connections within the Ferretmaster and Skydiver clans, Garm was already well ahead of most children when it came to specialize in a clan. Without hesitation, Garm chose to serve the clan of his mother, the Ferretmaster army. (But he still has to take the test to see if the clan accept him.)

First Mount

First, Garm was introduced to a mount. His first mount was a black ferret named Tik. Garm's mother had a white ferret mount and Garm was sure that he would develop the same relationship with Tik as his mother did to her mount. This was not to be. Garm found that Tik was slow and not aggressive enough for his liking. Garm did not tame Tik himself and he frequently was frustrated that the ferret didn't follow his orders as he wanted. Not only that, but the ferret was old and was a weak mount in practice battles. Soon after, Garm asked to retire the ferret and he chose a new mount.

Weapons Training

While Garm took his time choosing his mount, he undertook the first phase of weapons training. He was given a choice of possible weapons and he chose archery first. His strength broke the first few bows he practiced with and his drill master had to have a member of the Prowler clan make a special bow for Garm that was stronger and more resistant to breaking. (This doesnt work.  I mean, he is only just starting out the older Brownies would all have stronger arms than him as they would have built up the strength.) Garm took an instant liking to the new bow and found that his shots were able to fly longer and stronger.

While Garm was mastering the bow and arrow, his next choice of weapons was the daggers. (As I said before, why such an unusual choice of weapon? Hunting knives are a last resort defence only) At first, he practiced with a single knife in close combat maneuvers with his comrades. He was also trained in fighting animals such as rats, snakes and birds. After a time, Garm found it difficult to fight without some kind of shield on his empty hand. His drill master gave him a second knife and Garm enjoyed the special agile challenges of dual wielding the knives and he took to the tactic with enthusiasm.

The last weapon that Garm trained with was the spear. His drill master found it unusual for a soldier to train in more than two weapons but Garm's enthusiasm and dedication won him over and Garm was allowed to take up the spear. This weapon took the longest for Garm to master as it required not only stabbing and moving but also he had to learn how to fight with it and use it on a mount. (Think of how big and wide the fox is, then think how long your spear is.  How much can you actually reach?) Nevertheless, Garm found that the spear was to become his favored weapon.

Taming a Mount

Garm had been training for ten years with weapons and now it was time for him to choose a permanent mount. His drill master rode a grey fox that had recently had a litter of pups and Garm instantly came to love the fox pups. He also respected his drill master and asked if he could have a pup for a mount. He agreed and Garm took a fox pup for his own.

It took many months of taming, but eventually, Garm was able to befriend the fox and it became a loyal companion. However, taming and riding were two different things and the remaining years of his training consisted of mounted maneuvers and drills using his weapons while riding a swiftly moving young fox.

Garm named his new mount Nis and he found that the fox was highly intelligent and its personality mirrored his own: reckless and aggressive yet shrewed and clever. Nis rarely left Garm's side and Garm never left Nis. He slept with the fox, ate with the fox (he helped it hunt for mice) and talked to the fox daily. The two soon had their own communication style with barks, yips and grunts. (Whilst it is possible to train an animal to respond to certain sounds with a certain action, Im not sure you can actually talk with it as such. Basically, Im not quite sure what you mean here :P)

Graduation

The proudest moment of Garm's career was his graduation from the clan apprenticeship. With his grey fox mount beside him, Garm was announced for candidacy to become an official soldier of the Ferretmaster clan. But first, he was to be given the final test.

Garm's drill master, now older in years, gave Garm the responsibility of leading a small group of his fellow comrades into the wilds to hunt a rather nasty wolf that had been plaguing the village. The wolf, believed to be sick with raging wild fever, was unable to be tamed and posed a threat to the village. Garm, his mount Nis and two other Ferretmaster graduates-to-be were to embark alone and bring back the wolf's pelt as proof of their success. They were to live off the land and fight the wolf themselves with no assistance. (Argh!  Alone!  I dont think Brownies would normally attack something that size without at least a group of 15 or so, why would they expect the youngsters to?  Also, they have no way of carrying a wolf pelt back.)

Early the next morning, Garm readied his his fox and gathered his weapons. He donned his special lizard skin armor and rat helm and cloak. He sharpened his spear, coated his arrows with poison and tucked the daggers in his boot. He stepped outside to find his comrades waiting for him - Hick, a ferret rider and Jolal, an elfcat rider. The three embarked on the hunt, eager to obtain the coveted right as a full Ferretmaster soldier.

The Hunt

Unbeknownst to the three young graduates, Garm's father secretly followed the three on his own mount, a brown owl named Kork. No one knew it, but Garm's father was secretly afraid for his son and long harbored a secret. He almost failed his own graduation test due to his reckless behavior and almost gotten himself and his comrades killed. That was many years ago, and his father had since had a productive life since then, but he saw alot of himself in his son and worried that the same thing would happen to Garm.

While Garm's father watched from high above, the three Ferretmaster graduates stalked the wolf in the forest. They had several encounters with wild beasts, mostly smaller ones such as rats and a few snakes. Garm's father was proud of how his son was progressing and was tempted to leave the three alone and fly home. That was when they spotted the wolf.

The large wolf, snarling angrily, came leaping over the bushes to attack the three Brownies. Garm took charge and dispersed the group to surround the wolf. He fired off three arrows in rapid succession but missed two and landed one on the wolf's right leg. Furious, the wolf charged Garm and Nis. The grey fox leapt to the right and behind a boulder.

Jolal rushed in with her spear. She was too slow and the wolf managed to dodge and snap back with its powerful jaws foaming with saliva. Jolal backed away and counter attacked, this time landing a hit on the wolf's shoulder.

Meanwhile, Hick, the ferret rider, moved his elfcat atop a rock and blew several darts that hit the wolf squarely in the neck and back. That was when Garm came around and charged the wolf. With his spear leading the way, Garm and Nis came bounding down off the rock. The wolf turned to face the threat and leapt for him. Garm's spear thrust pierced the wolf's chest and the animal let out a howl of pain. (How would you reach?  Your arms and spear are rather short) The wolf jerked backwards pulling Garm off his mount. He landed hard on the ground, striking his head against a tree root.

Jolal and Hick renewed their attack, seeing that Garm was down. The wolf turned their attention on the remaining two Brownies. The animal was weakened now, bleeding and fatigued. (Your weapons will barely pierce its skin the poison on them will be what will kill it.) Garm stood up and shook the dizziness from his head. He pulled his knives from his boot and charged the wolf from behind. Nix, his fox mount, yelped and moved forward himself although the wolf was twice her size. He couldn't let his master attack alone.

By now, angry and in pain, the wolf had renewed aggression and had Jolal pinned down under a large piece of tree bark. Hick had run out of darts and was trying to reach for his own spear when the wolf snapped its jaws around his ferret's neck and snapped the mount's body, killing it instantly. Hick screamed in despair. Garm was almost upon the wolf.

Suddenly, a cry was heard from above. Garm looked up and saw his father falling from high atop the tree. His owl mount was screeching furiously and glided down to catch his master. Utterly shocked, Garm momentarily forgot about his companions and ran for his father. The wolf, now realizing that its main danger was gone, clawed Hick and bit the Brownie, shaking him furiously and tossing him a few peds away.

Jolal called for Garm's help, but he ignored her pleas and ran for his father. He found his father laying atop a pile of leaves, clutching his heart. Kork the owl landed beside them, cooing in despair. Garm cried out, confused and saddened to see his father now dead.

Then, a scream. Coming to his senses, Garm realized he had left his comrades alone with the wolf! He rushed back to find the wolf finishing off Jolal and her elfcat. Now enraged, and not caring about his own safety, Garm readied his spear and charged. The next few moments were a blur as the Brownie singlehandedly fought the injured wolf with his fox mount assisting by distracting the beast. In the end, Garm had a broken spear, no arrows and a lost dagger. He also was victorious in killing the wolf. But, sadly, he lost both of the comrades he was charged with keeping and the mysterious death of his father.  (His weapons wouldnt be what killed the beast, it would be the poison.  Also, charging up to a wolf to fight hand-to-hand is akin to charging a T-Rex.  You die.)

Aftermath

Upon returning home, the cheering of the village turned to cries of sadness as only one Brownie returned. Garm told of the hunt and what had happened. The drill master, Garm's mother and the Clan of Elders gathered around to pronounce judgment.

Because of his failure, Garm was denied membership of the Ferretmaster clan. The safety of his comrades should have come first, the drill master said, and Garm has left them in harm's way. He failed his duty as a leader and as a fellow soldier.

Garm, his dream of joining the Ferretmaster army now shattered, and the loss of his father and friends, found no reason to stay in the clan. He had no interest in apprenticing to any other clan. The Ferretmaster army was his only love and now it was gone.  (Actually he can take the test again next year, but the failure and guilt could still send him away.)

Garm then decided that it was time to leave the clan and embark on a different kind of journey. He would enter the world and search for a new life. Perhaps find another Brownie clan with which to join and live. So one night, he mounted his fox, claimed some new weapons, and left the Vale for good.

(Overall, I do like this little guy.  The lizard skin coat is rather cool in particular, and I think your history has just about the right balance of detail vs compactness.  My main worry would be the weapons really firstly because I dont think a Brownie would normally fight up close unless they absolutely had to, so duel wielding seems a bit far-fetched, and secondly because you have quite a few plus the animal.  Most of these could be balanced out by your tiny size really, but the way you play your character in the history he can just run up to a huge wolf and finish it off.  I think they would be far more likely to stalk the animal and fire poisoned arrows at it unless there were 20-30 of them.  Much as I love the way youve written the fight, I just dont think its realistic)
« Last Edit: February 13, 2008, 10:00:29 PM by Rookie Brownbark » Logged

Ghaji Greenswoop
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« Reply #4 on: February 13, 2008, 11:38:58 PM »

Wow...thanks Rookie. You gave me alot to think about!

Now, about those changes...I implemented your suggestions, which made very good sense by the way, and I think the CD is better. Changes are in red. But the big changes are to his personality and strengths and weaknesses.

I also changed the weapon proficiencies and gave him a blowpipe. I took out the daggers and changed the battle with the wolf (now a red fox).

I also changed the strengths and weaknesses considerably by removing the reckless behavior and bad eyesight. In all honesty, Garm is a soldier and would have few physical weaknesses or he couldn't be a soldier! So the bad eyesight was an attempt to do something without compromising his soldier skills.

I also changed some grammar errors and added the familiar, weapons and belongings sections.

Lastly, the animal "language" is not a language at all but simply a "vocabulary" of animal calls and sounds that Kweeuu has been trained to respond to for different actions. A bark could mean attack, a hiss could mean be sneaky, or a clicking noise could mean come here.

Its nice to meet a fellow brownie!

EDIT - Changed name from Garm to Ghaji.
« Last Edit: February 15, 2008, 05:51:44 AM by Ghaji Greenbark » Logged

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Ghaji Greenswoop
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« Reply #5 on: February 19, 2008, 05:44:36 AM »

*bump*

Hello...I was just hoping for more comments. My last one was 5 days ago. Thanks.
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Twn Arerwn
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« Reply #6 on: February 19, 2008, 07:58:32 AM »

Hello Ghaji and welcome to Santharia!

1) You have it mentioned that he knows how to use the spear. If this is the case it needs to be listed under his strengths as well.
2) If he knows how to make his own arrows this is a strength as well. Fletcher.

I would recommend some more potent weaknesses to offset his abundance of strengths. Also, being highly skilled in three weapons is a bit much for his age. Since the spear was his last choice to be trained in I would recommend something along the line of fair-decent for his proficiency.

I hope my comments aid you in being titled soon. If you have any questions please feel free to ask them here as there are many willing to help you. I changed the icon to the pencil while you make edits, please return it to the exclamation mark when you are finished and ready for more comments.
~Sincerely~
Co f cr'tuuln:Twen Araerwen
« Last Edit: February 19, 2008, 07:59:17 AM by Twn Arerwn » Logged

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« Reply #7 on: February 19, 2008, 09:09:51 AM »

Thank you for the comments, Twen.

I have addressed your comments in orange.

I have added the Fletcher skill as a strength. He can make his own arrows and darts.

I have deleted the spear skill. As Rookie pointed out, a spear would be next to ineffective for a small Brownie, especially when mounted on a larger steed like a fox. And, getting close enough to use a spear tends to be dangerous for a Brownie. To Ghaji, a spear is basically a stick with which to point at things.

I have added two weaknesses - Ghaji is a poor hunter. He is a good warrior, but he can't hunt very well. He let's his fox do it, but as an animal, Kweeuu doesn't share well.

Second weakness is that he tends to catch illness. He doesn't get anything serious, just coughs and sneezes and sometimes fever that hinders his fighting ability.

Hopefully this balances him out a little better.
« Last Edit: February 19, 2008, 09:11:29 AM by Ghaji Greenbark » Logged

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Elyr Fsamr
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« Reply #8 on: February 19, 2008, 09:25:26 AM »

I am not affirmative that the lack of hunting ability can be counted as a weakness. The average peasant has no hunting ability, and therefore this cannot be counted as a weakness.
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Ghaji Greenswoop
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« Reply #9 on: February 19, 2008, 09:46:23 AM »

Good point Eleyr, but consider my logic:

A Brownie cannot be compared to an average peasant because Brownies are not men. You can't compare a Brownie with a human or dwarf. You can compare Ghaji to a non-Ferretmaster, with no weapons training, but Ghaji was trained in weapons, fighting and wilderness survival. A lack of hunting ability for someone of his position poses a significant weakness. If you base this strictly against a non-soldier, then no it is not a weakness. But consider that someone like Ghaji is expected to know how to survive in the field. That is his life and mission. But if he lacks this basic skill, it becomes a weakness. If he lived primarily in the village, then its no big deal. What good is a soldier if he is expected to go out on a war party, for perhaps days at a time, and not be able to hunt a mouse for food?
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« Reply #10 on: February 19, 2008, 12:20:30 PM »

A brownie can be considered against the average. The skill of hunting effectively is not a common attribute amongst humans or brownies. This would be like saying "My character is a knight able to fight expertly with the sword, lance and shield but sadly he is not a great horseman. Then quoting lack of riding skill as a weakness. This would also be like a mage putting non weapon skills down as a weakness. Forget the fact that they can kill someone in a few hundred other ways." Just because a particular skill is suppose to be a particular proficiency to a social class, doesn't make the absence there-of into a weakness. It just means the character is just like the majority of others without that skill, hence average.
« Last Edit: February 19, 2008, 12:22:52 PM by Twn Arerwn » Logged

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« Reply #11 on: February 20, 2008, 12:18:09 AM »

Thank you Twen. That makes sense, although from my perspective, I still view it as a weakness. Nevertheless, I respect your judgment.

I have removed the poor hunting weakness and added a simple weakness that never occurred to me before. Ghaji has left the Vale in search of adventure in other lands and he lacks the ability to speak Tharian! I've looked up other CDs and found that this weakness is legitimate, especially with certain classes such as orcs and elves who have had little contact with humans in their lives.

Would this work?
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Simonne Miller
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« Reply #12 on: February 20, 2008, 02:58:43 AM »

Yes, this would work. So long as you remember to actually play that weakness. I've used that weakness for a few CDs already, so I don't see how I could deny someone else the right to use it ^.^ ;)
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« Reply #13 on: February 20, 2008, 03:35:13 AM »

I agree. Be sure to keep up the roleplay and not let a little Tharian slip here and there...hehe
« Last Edit: February 20, 2008, 03:36:27 AM by Dorrugh Svenstar » Logged

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« Reply #14 on: February 20, 2008, 03:37:00 AM »

Correct Simonne. You don't have to worry about me walking up to a human and start chatting about the weather!  LOL It would make for interesting RP interaction with a Brownie trying to talk to a human and everyone looking confused...but hopefully I'll find a patient RPer with which to interact with and develop something.
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