Adventures of Caelereth

Archives => Approved Characters 2009 => Topic started by: Airyn on January 25, 2009, 04:07:59 PM



Title: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on January 25, 2009, 04:07:59 PM
Name: Airyn Lesthos

Age: 135  (Lives for 700 years)

Age by appearance:  23 Human years

Age by knowledge and training:  A 26 year old Human

Birth Date:  The twenty-second day of The month of The Rising Sun

Gender:  Female

Weight:  1 Pygge, 3 Hebs

Height:  1 Ped, 2 Fores and 3 Nailsbreadths

Race:  Elf 

Tribe:  The Kay’rrhem Elves

Title:  The Worrywort

Occupation:  Healer  +  Water Mage

Overview
Airyn is a bright Elf, and loves to create and investigate things. She loves the movements of water and the beauty of ice, which inspired her to become a water mage. Airyn likes to spend most of her days tending to sick patients or walking Sage, her small dog. She also likes to explore, and believes that no one is too old or too busy to see the world around them. Airyn desires peace and peace of mind. She loathes war and any type of negative confrontation.

Appearance
She has light skin that is the colour of sand, mixed with tints of gold. Her blonde hair, reaching well below her shoulders, curls around her forehead and her cheeks. Airyn’s eyes are the colour of the darkest of green trees in a deep wood. They seem to have an enchanting shine when she smiles and a mischievous glint when she feels audacious. Her cheekbones are set high and are quite thin, forming a small arc in the direction of her eyes. Her sandy-blonde coloured eyebrows form a light curve above her eyes.
 
Airyn’s body is slim with curved features. They are not overly pronounced, but she is slightly muscular from her labour in gardening, and her constant walking and exercising. Airyn has slightly big feet, which she despises greatly for their awkwardness, but has thin hands with long fingers that are tipped with femininely cut short nails. The skin on her hands is surprisingly smooth, considering her work with herbs and cutting devices.

Her elven ears are often seen through her thick waves of hair, as she only wears her hair down about her shoulders if she isn't working, or if she has no care for tying it behind her neck. It is mostly worn in a neat plait, tied at the bottom with a coloured ribbon.

Clothing
Airyn favours long dresses with elbow-length sleeves in natural colours and tones. She doesn’t think highly of patterns or embroidery, but prefers simplicity and elegance. She usually wears a dress with a tight bodice, and a simple belt around the waist. She likes pretty, light coloured sandals, and a long, but thin, black cape that trails down her back. She loves the colours green and blue in dark shades, and wears things mostly of this colour. When working, Airyn trades her pretty gowns and sandals for a plainly-coloured working outfit that consists of a tight bodice with long sleeves, a long skirt and short black boots, and thin leather gloves. Her hair is tied up in a bun behind her head to keep it out of the way when she works.

Airyn’s jewellery is again simple, but appealing. She loves silver chains with pendants of any stone and shape hanging down on her chest. Mostly, these pendants are made from emerald or sapphire, but she sometimes wears a small opal (See history). Her bracelets usually match her necklaces, but no rings are placed on her fingers as she doesn’t want them to be ruined from her working.

Fighting Style
Airyn prefers not to fight, but will be silent and stealthy when she does. If she is being chased, she will lead her follower to a place with many obstacles to hide under/behind, so that she can attack without being seen. Her good stamina allows her to run keenly and for extended periods of time, so her fighting style is mostly defensive.

Personality
Airyn is quite a confusing elf. Some say that she has more human traits than she does elven. She is kind, but has a very impish nature at times and likes to use her spells for entertainment. She can also be very bad tempered and impatient, not to mention her very fussy nature. Airyn loves to investigate things, and will always find a reason why something is made, how it moves etc. Airyn loves to learn and will always find new answers and ideas. She never gives up, and determination is one thing that always drives her toward her goals.
Where her name might suggest that she follow air magic, or her love of gardening suggest that she practice earth magic, Airyn likes to be different and original. She follows her own dreams and will let no one try to decide her path for her.

She likes to have fun and is very light-hearted, most of the time. As a water mage, her moods, opinions and anything related to her emotions or frame of mind can change like the tides of the sea. Sometimes, she can be strong willed and independent, and sometimes she can be reserved and shy. It all depends on the situation she is place in. Airyn does not like to admit when she is feeling sad or at a loss, as she doesn't like to worry those around her.

Strengths + Weaknesses
Strengths:
Water Magic Level III – As a skilled water mage, Airyn has taken each and every day to learn the ways of magic and their elements at the Ximax Academy of Magic. As she is a fairly bright student, Airyn passed through the first level of water magic with little struggle. Since she showed promise in the ways of water magic, Airyn was recommended to train in level two and, finally, level three. She has good knowledge and understanding of spells and their uses, and also the understanding of magic itself. Each day she dedicates herself to her magic, and continues to train herself through, and to perfect, her spells and all forms of magic. This strength assists her in her gardening – being able to provide water to plants, in conflict, and to entertain young elves in boring times.

Healing and medicine – When Airyn had returned from Ximax, she noticed one day that her mother was tending to their garden, and watched her with fascination. Airyn asked her about the plants and what each of them does. Briony, Airyn’s mother, only had a small selection of plants in her gardens; just enough to mend scabby knees and common colds. Even so, Airyn asked her grandfather for books on herbs and medicine. He happily found her the texts she was after, thus beginning Airyn’s fascination and skill with medicine.
Airyn uses herbs and plants to tend to the sick children in the city where she lives. Adults often come to her, but whimpering children covered in scrapes and bruises from their escapades into the deep areas of the forest are nearly always crowding her doorstep.

Charm – Airyn has developed an awkward charm in her personality since leaving Ximax, and has the ability to charm visitors or travellers with a few simple words, and the assistance of her pretty appearance. She sometimes uses her magic to assist her in guiding travellers, but finds that she can make friends easily. Airyn has no trouble in striking up a conversation, even if it begins with her tripping over her own feet or walking into something, which happens often.

Ability to Read and Write - In order to participate in lectures and written exams at the Ximax Academy, Airyn had to learn to read and write. This was no trouble, as she believed that these things were important, and wasted no time in learning these skills. Airyn uses these things to communicate with others, and to continue to practice her magic and healing skills.

Fitness/Good Health- Airyn has a good fitness level, and never really finds herself in bad health. She doesn't tire easily, and never has to add her health to her long list of worries.

Boats - During her time spent at Ximax, one of Airyn's human friends decided to show her how to sail. Airyn now knows how to change a sail and how to control a boat's direction and speed.

Weaknesses:
Determination – Though this trait usually has good outcomes, Airyn an sometimes find herself being determined just to prove a point. At times, she can be very pig-headed, and will continue on a task even though she has been injured by it (See History).

Clumsiness – Quite regularly, Airyn finds that she is constantly walking into things, dropping things and leaving herself with bruises and small scratches by complete accident. This is one of her greatest flaws, as she is known to fumble with things if she does not use them regularly or if she knows that they are of priceless value. Her clumsiness came from her mother’s blood, and both mother and daughter are often leaving themselves with what they call “Battle wounds”, after simply being in the kitchen for half an hour, for example.

Stutter - Airyn is quite embarrassed to know that she has an awkward habit of stuttering at the most inappropriate of times. Though it doesn't happen every day, whenever Airyn tries to point something out, or merely in simple conversations, she repeats her words or can't find the names of things without making a fool of herself.

Overly Cautious - Airyn is one of those many beings who can't help but worry and fuss over every bad situation. She tends to try to make those around her happier than herself, thus ending in giving her low self-esteem. She is just one of the many that add "what if..." to the end of a sentence. She often keeps herself awake at night by worrying and thinking about anything and everything.

Spellcasting Effect - Though her magical ability is strong, nothing can stop the tiring effect that washes over her after casting even the most simple of spells. Airyn must take some time after casting to rid herself of a small headache, or to wait until the drowsiness or dizziness has passed. This has limited her spellcasting time to three to five minutes, and even less when she is ill or hasn't had the right amount of sleep.

Backpack Contents / Belongings
-  Two pairs of gloves (One for work and one for wear)
-  A small bag of coins
-  A bag of food (When travelling) that includes fruit, honey, bread and a small assortment of vegetables
-  A book that contains brief details of her lessons on spell casting
- A spare dress
- A light blanket
- A small cutting knife
- A pack of vials and bottles. Some filled with home-made salves, and others filled with raw herbs. She always keeps a small bag filled with Bladeleaf Ferns in this pack.
-  Some spellcasting reagents, including bottles of water, stones and (sometimes) ice in a bucket.

Familiar
Name: Sage

Gender: Male

Age: 2 and-a-half years of age, though it is unknown by Airyn. She assumes he is aged between two and four from his lean body and constant energy.

Breed: Dog

Type: Rimrunner

Height: Two and a half Palmspans

Weight: 2 Hebs

Length: About three Palmspans under 1 Ped

Fur Color: A dark white, almost cream

Eye Color: Dark Brown

Appearance: Sage’s white coat is often covered in dirt, giving it a grey or brown appearance. Strands of his long coat are often found on the floor of Airyn’s house, as there is a lot of it. His small paws also regularly leave muddy pawprints wherever he walks.

Sage has slightly small ears, with the one on the left slightly bent out of shape; however the cause of this is unknown, he remembers getting caught in a fence one day when he was young. It could have been a result of that.

He has a reasonably small snout with a wide nose. He has a constant appearance of happiness and content written on his face, though he often curls his lips back into a fierce snarl, revealing rows of sharp canine teeth, at anything he is unsure of. 

Personality: Sage is heavily afraid of the unknown. He pulls his lips back into a snarl at a slight movement or entrance to the room by a stranger. Airyn figured that his hostility towards the unknown was from his time without or away from his previous owner. The dog is extremely loyal, and very protective. He follows his mistress almost everywhere, and refuses to be alone for any longer than ten minutes.

He is not overly picky of his meals, being fed anything that his owner doesn’t eat, but has taken a liking for the taste of chicken.

Sage is an early riser, and sits, whining, at the foot of Airyn’s bed until he is taken for a walk in the morning. This ritual is performed every day, and his whine turns into an impatient bark when he is ignored.

He is bright-spirited and also cunning; never stopping until some sort of decision is made that involves him and receiving attention. Sage craves three things: affection, outside, and the space next to his mistress on the couch at the end of the day.

History: Sage’s history before the day when Airyn found him is somewhat blurred. He has some memories of his previous owner – someone who treated him well and fed him heartily, but the excitement of being a pup overcame any important memories; such as being told regularly not to jump on the furniture and to stop barking when people entered the room.

He had three brothers and one sister; who were all great fun since they were as old and energetic as he was. His mother wasn’t so keen on running around all the time, but she never minded the six of them bounding along when they were let out onto the field that had been very close. His father was never there, but Sage didn’t at all wonder why. It was said that he had belonged to a friend of Sage’s owner, but was never around after he had gotten Sage’s mother pregnant.

His last memory with his previous owner was being allowed to run across the field with his family, as he had always done. He remembers the wind blowing through his fur and the taste of grass on his tongue, and finally ending in the backstreets of... somewhere... and being approached by someone who smelled a lot like flowers...

It was when Airyn was walking to one of the city’s inns; she came across a small dog. It was white with long fur, and no collar around its neck or anything to identify its owner or its name.

The dog cocked its head to one side when she slowly bent down to scratch it behind the ear. It let out a soft growl when her hand advanced, but stood still as her skin touched its fur. Airyn gently picked up the small dog, and began to walk back towards the school where her small house stood nearby.

Three or four days had passed, and no one had made any mention of the missing Rimrunner. The elf had grown quite fond of the dog, and was unwilling to let him go. She had already given him a name, and he seemed to be more than happy to respond.

Since then, Sage has grown accustomed to hearing Airyn’s scolding voice when he did the wrong thing. She never kept him off the furniture, but barking, running inside the house, being impatient for food and scratching anything results in a harsh word and being banned from his places on the furniture.

He remembers his third, and most memorable, outing with his new mistress quite clearly. They went to the Ximax Academy first, and boredom overcame him as he was made to wait in her small study. He began to claw his way up onto her desk chair, leaving recognisable scratch marks in the wood. After sitting proudly with his back straight in achievement, he clawed his way through the open book on Airyn’s desk. His joyous escapade was soon brought to an end when Airyn came back into the room, saying nothing but “Sage...” in her most dangerous voice possible... That night ended with the back door slammed in his face, and the rain pouring down on him after being given no affection (or chicken) whatsoever.

Magic
Airyn has skilfully mastered the first Sphere of magic at the Ximax Academy of Magic, choosing to focus her interest on both the physical and the spiritual aspects of water.  Her desire for peace and a cheeky need of entertainment led her to the element. She is enchanted by water, and the forms it can take; admiring its beauty and understanding its restlessness. Airyn is capable of influencing the ounia of the element to create a change in its appearance and position. She can also alter it to influence someone’s mind.

Airyn does not use her magic to replace weapons. She hates any kind of fighting, and refuses to use her magic for those situations – even in her own defence. Airyn relies on her bodily strength and willpower to escape a troublesome situation. She knows more spells than the ones she favours, but they are ones that are used to harm or manipulate a person; both of which Airyn is strongly against doing.

Airyn has had no mentor, aside from the magicians and the lecturers at the Ximax Academy. Her father provided her inspiration to learn magic, and her determination and indifference led her to study the element of water. It was during her time spent at Ximax that she discovered that her strength lay with the physical, and most exciting, aspect of water magic.

The sphere of change enables her to influence the temperature of the water’s ounia to change water into ice with the touch of her open palm; used as a focus point. She has learned how to control the thickness of the ice that she spreads over the water’s surface, and has only used it against a person once, during the lesson which called for her to use an offensive spell on a target. (She was instructed to lower the target’s temperature, just enough for their skin to change colour. A light frost had covered his clothes when the demonstration had finished, and Airyn had begun to apologise continuously to her fellow student before calling for “something warm” for the boy.)
Anything covered with water, or anything with water on/in it, has the ability to be frozen by the touch of her skin or strong concentration. She has found it quite simple to influence the ounia of the water and its temperature, and has practiced freezing both living and non-living things; living things being injured or sick animals with no owner to speak of.
Though this spell is the one that Airyn is the most comfortable with, it is the one that she fears the most. Airyn takes great care to keep her target in one place, so as not to freeze anything of importance accidentally.

Since Airyn deals with a range of negative emotions in her profession, she uses the spell Calm to influence her patient’s frame of mind when she places two fingers on a piece of open skin. She finds that it causes her less grief later on in the day, if she makes her subject feel at ease with whatever situation they might be in that called for her aid. Spiritual spells aren’t too difficult for her to cast, but still require a fair amount of focus as she fears making a mistake. Airyn cannot permanently influence the mind, but is still wary of how much change she makes to someone’s emotions. Overall, she just tries to make someone comfortable and calm. She doesn’t like to go overboard in controlling their emotions, she influences it just enough for her to do her job and move on to the next person.

Shape Water doesn’t exactly come in handy all the time, but it is one of the few that Airyn has developed a very strong liking for. She simply has to place a hand in a mass of water and focus her will on influencing the car’all of the element.
This spell didn’t take as long to learn to cast as Harmony did, but she still finds it tricky to cast as it is the spell that tires her the most. Mostly she uses it to redirect the water’s flow, when it rains or when a bucket is spilled for example, but she just likes to watch it ripple and move as she creates shapes and bends it in different angles.

If anyone should come to her in an unannounced rage, or if they approach her, drunk during the evening (for example), Airyn uses the Distract spell. She greatly dislikes people coming toward her with unjust accusations, mostly with treatment failures etc, or when they are not in the right frame of mind. She simply makes them forget their purpose of talking to her long enough for her to quickly walk away with a slight grin on her face.

Spell casting always has an affect on Airyn, no matter how small the spell. Each time she uses magic, it has a tiring effect on her, resulting in her becoming drowsy and sometimes dizzy. Physical spells allow her more control and enable her to use them for at least five minutes before they take their effect, but spiritual spells require the most concentration and willpower. Airyn uses more of her will to use spells that alter the mind, as she fears loss of control. They cannot be used for very long, and she only uses it when she is talking to her patients. Constant training has enabled her to extend her use to about three minutes, five at the most, but she needs to take breaks in between her casting.

Her favourite pastime is freezing things, and making water move in all sorts of directions and angles. She loves the combination of water and ice, and would be more than willing to spend hours on end watching the water move and freeze before her eyes if it did not have such an effect on her. She often chooses to perform her tricks near a large body of water, rather than just puddles and ponds as it is easier for her to concentrate in the silence and peace of a secluded area, rather than the bustle of the city.

History
Airyn was born in her parent’s bedroom of her family home. Her mother, Briony, and father, Ker, had been married since their early adulthood. Briony’s pregnancy was unplanned but she learned, during the long months of waiting, that it was one of the best things that would happen in her life. Briony was nervous about her pregnancy, and worried frequently about the many things that could go wrong and the things that might affect her or the baby. This was one of the few traits that Airyn inherited from her mother.

It was mid afternoon when Airyn was born, and the wind was blowing fiercely through the window. The curtains were billowing in time with Briony’s quick breathing, but it seemed that Ker was the most worried being in the room. Ker’s sister had stayed the previous night, and offered to deliver the baby as she had already given birth to three children of her own. Ker knew very little about childbirth as he was kept out of the room when his sister was born, and had never experienced such a strong wave of emotions before.
Airyn was named after the storm that raged outside when she was born, and Ker’s mastery of Wind Magic.

Airyn was a quiet baby, which surprised her parents immensely. She never cried in the middle of the night, and only wailed if she craved the attention that her parents frequently lavished upon her. As she grew older, Airyn began to discover things and would always answer her parents with “Why?” or “How?”

She never complained, and was taught to follow rules and to respect the things around her, but had a certain pout that she used when things didn’t go in the way she had planned. Airyn was fairly short for her age, and was always one or two Fores shorter than the other children, but had quite a growth spurt around the age of eighteen, and again at the age of 23 where she grew to her full height of one Ped, two Fores and three Nailsbreadths. Over time she has gradually grown in very slight measures, but not enough to tell the difference from her original height.

Airyn was a single child until she was aged fifteen. Her two brothers, born just under two minutes apart, were born only two weeks after Airyn’s fifteenth birthday. The twins were delivered in the same place that Airyn had been born – in the safety and comfort of her parents’ bedroom.

Airyn knew that her mother was to have a baby, but was absolutely amazed when her mother granted her with not one, but two younger siblings. Briony and Ker just looked at the twins lovingly, and kissed each other tenderly.
 
As the boys grew older, Airyn made it her sisterly responsibility to watch over them and keep them out of trouble. Briony would often have to sit her daughter down and tell her that Rian and Luke were not going anywhere, “You have your entire life to watch over them, dear. Let’s see how they wander on their own, shall we?”
Airyn thought it unfair when her brothers began to think that they were the “Men of the Household”, and no longer wanted her attention. Instead, they were telling her that she shouldn’t play outside as she might ruin her clothes. Briony and Ker watched with smiles and laughs as the twins tried to boss their older sister around, usually ending with Airyn being quite disappointed at her lack of control over them and walking away.

When Airyn began her early teenage years she began to wander by herself more often, rather than standing by her mother or father’s side most of the time. Her childhood uncertainty had been replaced with courage and a sense of adventure, but her lust for knowledge and reason remained the same. The forest that (still) hides the Elven city became Airyn’s source of discovery. She would sit for hours on end in a small clearing, trying to find the names of the trees and the different types of shrubs that grew wildly around her. Airyn’s aunt, Ker’s sister and an Earth Mage, had once told her the names of all the trees that grew in the forest and those of the animals that inhabited them. Airyn convinced herself that she follow in her Aunt’s footsteps to become an Earth Mage. She often had dreams of travelling to Ximax, where she would gain an education on the element of Earth. She would assist her parents in their work, Briony being a chef and Ker being an architect, and hopefully add enough to their income so that they could afford for her to travel on a ship to attend the expensive, but legendary, magical school; the school that her father’s family had attended for generations. It was a child’s dream, of course, but Airyn knew that one day she would proudly walk the academy’s grounds and would never forget that moment in her entire life.

Airyn came from a family with great knowledge about magic. Her father attended the Ximax Academy, studying wind magic to the third level. His father had attended the school simply to provide him with something challenging to do. He is persistent with his learning, and demands that something must be achieved after every day. He traveled across the sea to the city in an urgent need to discover the great school that teased him with interest and achievement.

When Airyn’s father was young, he was taught briefly about the school and its purpose. Ker was enchanted, and immediately pulled all of the knowledge about magic from his father that could be obtained by a young child. Ker’s sister followed this interest, but found that the forest around her held so much more opportunity for excitement in her eyes. She decided to travel to Ximax in envy of her brother; seeing that he had learnt so much and could have power over something. In truth, all she had ever wanted was to follow her brother and father to the city but, with her strong and easily damaged pride, decided to try and make something of herself in the place around her.

Ker was taken to Ximax with his father whilst he worked as a teacher at the school. There, Ker took an education on Wind Magic at a discounted price, since his father was working long hours to keep them there. He began his education at age 14, being taught by his father until Ker chose to study the element of Wind, and was admitted into the school at age 17. Yes, he was the youngest in his class, but it had kept him from running amok in the grounds, and getting himself into trouble. Ker’s father had made a deal with the headmaster of the school – He must stay on as a teacher if he wanted his son to learn at the school. This would last only until Ker had reached the end of Level Three, as they were unwilling to teach a boy so young any further magical skills.

Ker and his father travelled back to Nybelmar when he had finally learnt all that the school was willing to teach him. Ker’s father became a scribe, and Ker used his newfound skill of wind magic to help him in becoming an architect and a builder.

Airyn’s mother knew very little of the city of Ximax, and had developed no intention of leaving her forest home. It was the day when she had attempted to look past her reserved personality, to talk to the son of an old scholar who resided near her parent’s home. It was the sudden racing of her pulse, and the blush that covered her cheeks that kept her coming to his house each day. He laughed at her shyness, and respected her personality. The pair were inseparable from the day that she had smiled at him from her work in his front garden.  

Airyn was 24 when she decided to study Water magic. All those years of questioning her aunt about Earth magic had suddenly disappeared. It was winter, and the light frost that blanketed the grass and the trees enchanted her. She raced down to a small river, deep in the forest, and came to a halt when she reached the bank. The water was almost silver coloured, with long streams of white dancing under the surface. Airyn put her hand in the water, but pulled it back when the cold frost covered her hand. From that day, she wanted to know everything she could possibly learn about water and ice. She would continually ask her grandfather about the craft, and would one day ask him to be her teacher.

Airyn's parents were capable of sending their daughter to the Ximax Academy of Magic, and suggested that she learn from their tutors and magicians rather than receiving a mentor, and staying in Nybelmar. They wanted their 34 year-old daughter to discover the world around her and were prepared to send her far away from home to do so, as they knew that she would be able to learn quickly, and would not waste her knowledge. Airyn’s grandfather had suggested the same thing as her parents had. He thought that he was too old to take on an apprentice, and knew that she would get a much better education in Ximax.

Before Airyn was sent to Ximax, her mother sat her down at the dining table and held a chain with a small opal in her outstretched hand. "This belonged to your grandmother," she said lightly, "I want you to take this with you." Airyn smiled and let her mother drape the chain around her neck. "I will treasure this forever," Airyn whispered, and at her mother's smile, fingered the tiny stone. "That stone," Briony began, "has been handed down through the women in our family for generations. Let it bring you luck at Ximax, and know that by wearing this, your father and I will always be with you." The stone did not leave Airyn's neck until her ship docked on the shores of Nybelmar again.

Since Airyn had no specific mentor to speak of, as she learnt her lessons from the academy's teachers, she follows the orthodox Ximaxian theory of Magic, the same as the understanding that her father holds for wind magic. She was disappointed when her father could not take her as his apprentice, but he simply smiled and told her to follow her own dreams, and not to do things just because she may feel obligated to please someone other than herself.

The teacher's at the school took a liking to the elf, and constantly encouraged her to "look inside herself, and follow the feelings that presented themselves."
"Do not ever force your will from you," they said, "and focus yourself on the form that you want it to create; control it that way."

In one of Airyn’s classes, as her teacher was explaining the idea of freezing and manipulating water to his students, Airyn knew suddenly that she had made the right choice in coming to the academy. She was entrapped in her teacher’s stories and explanations, and knew that this was something that she wanted to pursue. Though her understanding of car’all was vague at that point, she was determined to learn everything she possibly could about water magic.

That evening, after school hours, Airyn was sitting in a small group of students in their room. They were chatting excitedly about the classes, and wishing that they could be old enough to learn in the second level so they could learn how to freeze things.

Airyn wanted to be able to cast right away, and spent the whole night trying to do so. Though she did not have the knowledge or understanding to do anything as of yet, Airyn believed that she could do anything that could be imagined. She closed her eyes and went silent, not even listening to the other students as they were talking. Airyn was silent for minutes on end, just sitting there, trying to focus. The others were watching her, curious, until suddenly the room had turned cold. They stared in amazement, but said nothing. The room continued to grow colder, until it stopped. The normal temperature was returned, and Airyn had opened her eyes. "Can you do that again?" The elf on her left asked in awe.
Airyn was never able to cast that spell again that night, or even in the many nights that followed. Though she tried each day, she was just left with disappointment and a splitting headache. Airyn finally cast the spell again in the second semester of her training in level two magic, many years later.

Airyn decided to leave the Ximax Academy Magic at the end of her training in the third level of magic, when she was 43 years of age. She wanted to continue her training to level four - or at least learn the practical elements of the training, but she missed her family incredibly, since they couldn't afford to use most of their savings to come and see her. Nine years was a long time to be away from family, and Airyn decided that she could study books and scrolls to gain a theoretical knowledge of the fourth level of magic and be able to see her family at the same time.

It was four years after her return from Ximax when Airyn decided to live on her own. She had missed her family immensely, but decided that it was time for her to live by herself in order to have a space to be called her own. She did not move far from her family home but now feels grateful for the peace granted to her, as she would not have liked to be in the same house as her brothers when they told Ker and Briony that they had plans to run away to live with circus folk...

Airyn moved back to the city of Ximax not long after she came home. Airyn craved the city life, and the near silence of the forest only added to her longing for the sound and bustle that came with living in the energetic city. She hated to leave her family, but decided that she should get some sense of adventure instead of staying in the same place for the rest of her life. Her family was reluctant to see her leave, but they knew that they would see her again. After all, hadn’t they been given the chance to seek adventure before?

She found a small house in the city of Ximax, and agreed with the landlord to pay a small fee for her rent if she would do some work in the school’s infirmary. Airyn had also considered going back to the school to further her studies, but no decision was ever made. Instead, one of the school’s teachers offered her a position as a scribe, but she denied. Airyn wanted to keep some of her old habits with her, and chose to continue with medicine.


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Gardener + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on January 26, 2009, 09:35:33 PM
Well, I'm not quite sure about it, but I'm ready for any comments headed my way. Please let me know if my magic needs tweaking, as I wasn't quite sure whether I did it right or not.

Thanks in advance.


Airyn.


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Gardener + Water Mage
Post by: Weivóc'Neán on January 26, 2009, 11:59:01 PM
I can't answer your question, but I looked up, and at 14 years old, it is as if she were a 7 and 1/2 year old human, so if you convert her to human years and knowledge, you are asking a 7 and 1/2 year old to start learning magic. It is possible, but money is the only question.


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Gardener + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on January 27, 2009, 05:19:43 PM
Hmm.. yeah that is too young for a human to start magic, but because she's an elf I don't know. The human age to start trainging Level 1 is 14, and the closest age for other races. I'm a bit confused...


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Gardener + Water Mage
Post by: Simonne Miller on January 27, 2009, 08:47:39 PM
The elven aging calculator (http://aocrpginfo.awardspace.com/EAC/services/elven_aging_conversion.htm) gives this information:

Your elf is 100% Kaýrrhem, and will live a maximum of 700 years.

Your elf looks like a human about 14 years old, has the aproximate  knowledge & training of a 14 year old human, and is 26 years old.


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Gardener + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on January 27, 2009, 09:22:39 PM
Okay, so she can start at 26? That's easy. Lol.
Thanks for the help both of you   :azn:


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Gardener + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on January 29, 2009, 07:23:32 PM
Well I don't know what else to write or edit, so I guess I'm ready for comments  :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Gardener + Water Mage
Post by: Simonne Miller on January 29, 2009, 10:03:49 PM
Alright, lets take a look, shall we?

This is my first character, so I'm giving magic a shot   The logic kind of escapes me there, since a magic character is one of the hardest to get approved, but it's your character ;)

Name: Airyn Lesthos

Age: 201  (Lives for 700 years)

Age by appearance: 25 Human years

Age by knowledge and training: A 30 year old Human

Birth Date: Twenty-Second of June If you take a look at the Santharian Calendar (http://www.santharia.com/cosmos/santharian_calendar.htm) you will see that the month of June is called Dál'injerá or, in Tharian, Rising Sun.

Gender: Female

Weight: 1 Pygge, 3 Hebs (65 Kilos)

Height: 1.7 Peds (1 metre, nearly 70 centimetres) We generally discourage the use of decimals, so if you could write it out long the way you did the weight, that would be great, plus it creates consistency ;)

Race: Elf 

Tribe: The Kay’rrhem Elves

Title: Water Mage (Level Three)

Occupation: Gardener


Overview

Airyn is a bright Elf, and loves to create and investigate things. She loves the movements of water and the beauty of ice, which inspired her to become a water mage. Airyn likes to spend most of her days tending to gardens and plants to express her creative passion. She also likes to explore, and believes that no one is too old or too busy to see the world around them. Airyn desires peace and peace of mind. She loathes war and refuses to assist in battle if and when she is required. Good thing then that Southern Sarvonia hasn't had a real war in the past 600 years, right? ;)



Appearance

She has light skin that is the colour of sand, mixed with tints of gold. Her blonde hair, reaching well below her shoulders, curls around her forehead and her cheeks. Airyn’s eyes are the colour of the darkest of green trees in a deep wood. They seem to have an enchanting shine when she smiles and a mischievous glint when she feels audacious. Her cheekbones are set high and are quite thin, forming a small arc in the direction of her eyes. Her sandy-blonde coloured eyebrows are the sentence reads a bit strange. Perhaps 'form a light curve'? Or 'lightly curve', without the are? light curve above her eyes.
Airyn’s body is slim with curved features. They are not overly pronounced, but she is slightly muscular from her labour in gardening, and her constant walking and exercising. She also has small, but jagged scar just under her left ear from being sliced during her first ever session of battle training (See history).
Airyn has slightly big feet, which she despises greatly for their awkwardness, but has thin hands with long fingers that are tipped with,< delete comma femininely cut,< delete comma short nails. The skin on her hands is surprisingly smooth, considering her work with plants and digging devices. There is also a long scar, just under her breasts, that is the end result of very severe burns from a childish accident with an open flame (See History).
Her elven ears are often seen through her thick waves of hair, as she only wears her hair down about her shoulders if she isn't working, or if she has no care for tying it behind her neck. It is mostly worn in a neat plait, tied at the bottom with a coloured ribbon.

One spacing is enough, no need for three :)

Clothing

Airyn favours long dresses with elbow-length sleeves in natural colours and tones. She doesn’t think highly of patterns or embroidery, but prefers simplicity and elegance. She usually wears a dress with a tight bodice, and a simple belt around the waist. She likes pretty, light coloured sandals, and a long, but thin, black cape that trails down her back. She loves the colours green and blue in dark shades, and wears things mostly of this colour. When working, Airyn trades her pretty gowns and sandals for a simple working shift in light brown and short boots made of black coloured leather. This 'working shift', does it have pants or a skirt? Her working gloves are of a simple material, tightly woven wool in any colour. They cover just above her wrists, and do not often let small barbs or dirt inside.
Airyn’s jewellery is again simple, but appealing. She loves silver chains with pendants of any stone and shape hanging down on her chest. Mostly, these pendants are made from emerald or sapphire, but she sometimes wears a small opal (See history). Her bracelets usually match her necklaces, but no rings are placed on her fingers as she doesn’t want them to be ruined from her working.

One space

Weapons

Airyn despises any form of battle, and refuses to use any form of weapon, thus declines any armour suggested to her (See History). If Airyn is met with any situation that requires battle or a fight of some sort, she will use her magic, mostly freezing spells, to defend herself and to distract her target. If you don't have any weapons, this section really isn't necessary ;)

One space

Fighting Style
Airyn prefers not to fight, but will be silent and stealthy when she does. If she is being chased, she will lead her follower to a place with many obstacles to hide under/behind, so that she can attack without being seen. Her good fitness fitness? You mean stamina? allows her to run keenly and for extended periods of time, so her fighting style is mostly defensive.

One space

Personality

Airyn is kind and just, but also has an impish nature. She will sometimes use spells for entertainment, and for no purpose other than just to be able to smile. She can also be very bad tempered, but only if she is confronted without reason or justice. She is very inquisitive, and likes to ask questions. Airyn loves to learn and will always find new answers and ideas. She never gives up, and determination is one thing that always drives her toward her goals.
As Not sure but I'd put "where" instead of "as" her name might suggest that she follow air magic, or her love of gardening suggest that she practice earth magic, Airyn likes to be different and original. She follows her own dreams and will let no one try to decide her path for her.
She likes to have fun, and is very light-hearted, most of the time. As a wind I thought she was a water mage? mage, her moods, opinions and anything related to her emotions or frame of mind can change like the tides of the sea. Sometimes, she can be strong willed and independent, and sometimes she can be reserved and shy. It all depends on the situation she is placed in. Airyn does not like to admit when she is feeling sad or at a loss or lostloss, as she doesn't like to worry those around her.



Likes + Dislikes

Likes:
- Dogs and Dog-Like creatures for their loyalty
- Dresses (Yes, she is girly  )
- Ice for it's beauty
- Forests for their natural charm
- Good tempers and reason
- Travelling on boats (She loves the sea air, and the salty smell of the ocean)

Dislikes:
- Fire (See History)
- Injustice, as she strives for peace and to be fair
- Dishonesty, as she was raised always to tell the truth and to be honest with herself. "If you are true to yourself, you are true to the ones around you," Her father often tells her.
- Mice, as she thinks they are disease-ridden pests
- Silence (She loves rooms to be vibrant and cheerful)
- Worry, and doing wrong by someone


Strengths + Weaknesses

Strengths:
Water Magic Level III – As a skilled water mage, Airyn has taken each and every day since her tenth birthday to learn the ways of magic and their elements at the Ximax School of Water Magic. As she is a fairly bright student, Airyn passed through the first level of water magic with little struggle. Since she showed promise in the ways of water magic, Airyn was recommended to train in level two and, finally, level three. She has good knowledge and understanding of spells and their uses, and also the understanding of magic itself. Each day she dedicates herself to her magic, and continues to train herself through, and to perfect, her spells and all forms of magic. This strength assists her in her gardening – being able to provide water to plants, in conflict, and to entertain young elves in boring times.

Gardening – When Airyn left the Ximax Academy at the end of her training actually, level three is not the end of the training. I don't know what you wrote in your history, but you're gonna need a reason why she decided not to study on for level 4 and higher. And studying on first is no option, since this is your first character and you're not allowed a level above three ;), she came back to her Elven home to be with her mother, father, and two younger brothers. She noticed one day that her mother was tending to their garden, and watched her with fascination. Airyn then assisted her mother in tending to the gardens around their town, and the small fields around it. When Airyn developed a love for the hobby, she began to work solidly and efficiently on her own, and was quickly named “The girl with the Green Thumb”, as she never left a garden without life. Airyn has since then developed a knowledge of some plants and their properties, thus being able to use them for light medicines and for food or decoration.

Charm – Airyn has developed an awkward charm in her personality since leaving Ximax, and has the ability to charm visitors or travellers with a few simple words, and the assistance of her pretty appearance. She sometimes uses her magic to assist her in guiding travellers, but finds that she can make friends easily. Airyn has no trouble in striking up a conversation, even if it begins with her tripping over her own feet or walking into something, which happens often.

Ability to Read and Write - In order to participate in lectures and written exams at the Ximax Academy of Magic, Airyn had to learn to read and write. This was no trouble, as she believed that these things were important, and wasted no time in learning these skills. Airyn uses these things to communicate with others, and to continue to practice her magic and gardening skills.

Fitness/Good Health- Airyn has a good fitness level, and never really finds herself in bad health. She doesn't tire easily, and never has to add her health to her long list of worries.

Weaknesses:
Determination – Though this trait usually has good outcomes, Airyn an sometimes find herself being determined just to prove a point. At times, she can be very big-headed you mean pig-headed? ;), and will continue on a task even though she has been injured by it (See History).

Fear of Fire – When she was a young girl, Airyn had a rough encounter with an open flame (See History). Since then, she will not go near a flame no matter how small or harmless it can be. This fear leaves her uncertain and clumsy when she is near fire, and will not even allow her to put it out with her magic. More than once has this resulted in trees burning around her, and even a wall of her house catching on fire after she accidentally tipped a candle on its side. That's... quick. Walls of a house are usually the last thing standing after a raging fire. I can't really believe one small candleflame can set fire to a whole wall.

Clumsiness – Quite regularly, Airyn finds that she is constantly walking into things, dropping things and leaving herself with bruises and small scratches by complete accident. This is one of her greatest flaws, as she is known to fumble with things if she does not use them regularly or if she knows that they are of priceless value. Her clumsiness came from her mother’s blood, and both mother and daughter are often leaving themselves with what they call “Battle wounds”, after simply being in the kitchen for half an hour, for example.

Stutter - Airyn is quite embarrassed to know that she has an awkward habit of stuttering at the most inappropriate of times. Though it doesn't happen every day, whenever Airyn tries to point something out, or merely in simple conversations, she repeats her words or can't find the names of things without making a fool of herself.

Overly Cautious - Airyn is one of those many beings who can't help but worry and fuss over every bad situation. She tends to try to make those around her more happy than herself, thus ending in low self-esteem. She is just one of the many that add "what if..." to the end of a sentence. She often keeps herself awake at night by worrying and thinking about anything and everything.



Skills
- She can cook rather nice meals, having learnt some special recipes from her mother
- Airyn has learnt how to change a sail on a boat (In her years at Ximax, her human friends taught her how to sail and to repair a boat)
- Airyn knows how to fish (After listening to sailors and fishermen), but chooses not to as it is not the way of her tribe Any skill that you have should be added to the strenghts, not added in a separate section :)


Backpack Contents / Belongings

- Small crystals of Emerald, Sapphire and Ruby
- Two pairs of gloves (One for work and one for wear)
- A small bag of coins
- A bag of food (When travelling) that includes fruit, honey, bread and a small assortment of vegetables
- A book that contains brief details of her lessons on spell casting
- A spare dress
- A light blanket
- A small cutting knife



Familiar

A cheeky, but loyal young Wood Owl, by the name of Pip (See History), found in a small clearing near Airyn's family home, funnily chasing a small mouse across the forest floor.


Magic

Airyn has skillfully mastered the first Sphere of magic at the Ximax School of Water Magic, choosing to focus her teachings on the physical aspects of water. Her magical strength for this element lies in controlling the motions and appearance of water. She is able to make a small puddle expand to the size of a lake, and can also make a waterfall freeze entirely. This took years of perfecting and learning, and Airyn was eager to do both as befitting of her tribe. Her favourite and strongest strength in this craft is the ability to move and shape water, not just to expand it. She sometimes separates streams to make pathways to land on the other side, or will make rain spiral prettily as it falls. Airyn sees the beauty of water, not it's dangerous side.

Since Airyn had no specific mentor to speak of, as she learnt her lessons from the academy's teachers, she follows the othodox Ximaxian theory of Magic, like the elven understanding that her father holds for wind magic. She was disappointed when her father could not take her as his apprentice, but he simply smiled and told her to follow her own dreams, and not to do things just because she may feel obligated to please someone other than herself.
The teacher's at the school took a liking to the elf, and constantly encouraged her to "look inside herself, and follow the feelings that presented themselves."
"Do not ever force your magic from you," they said, "visualise it forming for you, and focus yourself on it's shape. Control it that way."

Airyn has completely mastered three spells, and uses them with absolute confidence. She uses these spells as she likes, since she knows and understands when it is appropriate to use them. These spells are: Shape Water (Learnt in her third level with some struggle, but mere focus and training helped to perfect this spell), Ice Touch (Learnt in her second level with no struggle at all, but was merely surprised when she figured out what it took to perform the same spell she had in her first year at Ximax...), and finally Harmony. By nature, Airyn is a peaceful being and uses this spell to meditate, and to calm any being's emotions and mind. She also uses this spell to control moods and emotions, but only when there is anger or frustration of some sort. Airyn will never permanently interfere with the mind, thus uses this spell in short bursts.

Airyn has taken many years to practice the casting for her water related spells. At the beginning of her training in this area, Airyn grew tired very quickly whilst casting it. She had some trouble in the casting of the spell, but not the spell itself, so her teachers recommended that she distance herself from company for a period of time to allow her to perfect her skills. Airyn sat down by a long river in Ximax, away from any of her peers, and placed her hand in the water. She found that her spell is better cast when she comes into contact with the subject, and eventually gained the stamina to control her casting. Now, Airyn simply focuses all of her strength on her target, and lets her will bring the magic forward. Airyn is capable of shaping and moving reasonable weights of water, and can lift up to 6 Hebs (30 Kilos). At first, she could only lift water that weight not much more than a small bucket. Heavier weights would rarely be moved great distances as Airyn fears loss of focus and causing accidents for those around her. Airyn cannot carry water for any longer than ten minutes, as the strength still tires her quickly.
It took little time for Airyn to master the changing of water to ice. Airyn uses this magic in her defense (Should she need it), and also to entertain young elves by freezing fountains or shaping water into small figures and freezing them. Mastered by vigorous training, Airyn controls this spell with not more than a simple gesture of her hand. When she was first learning this spell, Airyn could not draw her eyes from her target or she would lose her concentration. This spell is one that Airyn fears the most, though it is the one that she is most confident with. Airyn takes great care to keep her target in one place, so as not to freeze anything of importance accidentally.
Airyn must use her hand to touch her target when using mind-related spells. She carefully presses a finger to the subject, and breathes deeply. This spell is the one that requires the most focus, and she uses just enough of this spell to send the subject into a temporary state of relaxation. This spell also has a tiring effect on Airyn. She must only use this spell once a day, or even once a week depending on the mass of people she uses it on, though she rarely uses it on crowds as it is nearly impossible for her to do.

Airyn can do all of the spells up to the third level in water magic, but she chooses to use these three in particular as, one, they are her favourite and, two, they are the first spells that she learnt in each level. They are of great importance to her, and are used as a way of remembering her time spent at Ximax.

Her favourite pastime is freezing things, and making water move in all sorts of directions and angles. She loves the combination of water and ice, and will spend hours on end watching the water move and freeze before her eyes. She also collects the dew from the grass and beads them along spiderwebs, much to the awe and amusement of those around her. Sometimes these acts can draw small crowds, but she mostly performs her tricks deep in a forest, wherever there is a mass of water.

Airyn uses her water magic to help "feed" the plants that she tends to. She believes that water is the giver of life, and proudly watched flowers and trees grow around her.

Yeah, I don't know anything about magic so I'm gonna leave that section to someone who does ;)

History

Airyn was born on a ship at sea, when her Elven mother and father were on their way back to Eastern Nybelmar, after being a part of a long expedition. Where to? Airyn’s mother, Briony, is was a brilliant cook, and was requested by the captain of that ship to prepare the small gathering of crew and passenger’s passengers meals in return for a fair wage. Briony demanded that her new husband accompany her on this trip, and the seaman had no choice but to oblige. except that he could have asked someone else. A decent cook is taken just as easily as a great cook, and is probably less expensive. Perhaps change it to that he saw no 'reason' to deny her request? It was unknown to her at that point in time, that she was already two months pregnant. This voyage was said to last about seven to eight months, as the captain was training his young mapmaker and needed someone to chart the seas and the lands around them. Briony and her husband agreed, and so the wait for Airyn began. That's kind of contradictory. They don't know that Airyn is is on her way, but the wait began? I'd rephrase that.
As they were on their return trip, back to Eastern Nybelmar, Briony was surprised to find that she was going into labour. Of course, the sudden weight gain and the constant cravings had been a giveaway to the rest of the crew; Briony had never learnt of pregnancy and childbirth before and was astounded. She's an elf, probably (I don't know) about 300 years old say, and she has never even seen a birth? She doesn't know anything about pregnancy or childbirth? She never even wondered why her tummy was growing to preposterous girth and why she felt something inside kicking, she didn't bother to ask anyone about it? I'm sorry, but that is just unbelievable. If you live in any kind of community, even one where relatively fewer children are born than in a human society, you know at least the basics...
Airyn was named after the sea winds that reached freezing temperatures and high velocities. Her name would serve as a reminder to her parents of the long sea voyage that marked one of the most memorable moments of their life.

Airyn grew up as a single child until she was aged sixteen. Her two brothers, twins, were born in Airyn's family home two weeks after Airyn's birthday. She nurtured the infants through their childhood, and did not fuss when they decided that it was time for them to nurture her - as young boys do. She's sixteen, she's still in her own childhood. Isn't the mother there to nurture them? Also, I don't really see what you mean with 'they decided to nurture her'?

She was an inquisitive child, and it seemed that the trait had stuck with her past those years. She was eight years of age when the leaders of her tribe decided to judge her skill in fighting and weaponry. She followed a group of five guards, in a line of ten uncertain children no older than herself. Each child was given a small shield and blade to hold, and the guards would demonstrate the basic techniques of fighting. When it was turn for the free-fighting, Airyn was partnered with a young boy that reached almost one Palmspan above her (Airyn was quite short as a child, before her growth spurt at age elevenAt eleven, she looks like a 7-year-old. If you want a growth spurt at 11 'human age' she'll be 20.). He eagerly wielded his weapons, and got quite excited when his opponent scowled at his waving of the new and exciting things that were called “Swords”. At the signal to begin, he lunged forward enthusiastically and rejoiced, thinking she was pretending, when Airyn cried out in a sudden pain below her ear. The guards separated the pair and from that moment forward, Airyn has never touched or even looked at another sword since that day. Ok, I read through the entry on the Kayrrhem again and nowhere does it say that this tribe would be so cruel as to take a bunch of kids, who are of an age equivalent of a 4-year-old human and make them fight. I'm sorry, but I feel I have to be blunt for a moment. If you decide to have an elf character, at least let her *be* an elf, don't make her a human with pointy ears. Take into account that you're likely to be considered a child until you're well past fifty, and possibly even longer (not really sure how that works for the Kayrrhem). If you do that, you might as well just make a human, no?

A few months after her trouble with the Soldiers and their training, Airyn was watching a travelling fire mage perform some tricks in front of a small crowd. How did a fire mage find all the hidden valleys and secluded spots deep in the jungle, like we can read in the entry? As she was quite short for her age and couldn’t see past the taller people around her, so  she decided to push her way to the front of the crowd. The fire mage smiled at the small girl, and gave her a small lamp. Inside it burned a flame that was blue in colour, one that she had never seen before. “Why is the colour of the sea replacing the colour of this flame?” She asked, puzzled and amazed. The mage laughed and closed her hands around the base of the lamp, “This flame burns to it’s brightest and hottest form. Treasure it, but never touch the glass that holds it.”
Airyn was delighted with her gift, but wanted to know more about the flame. When she showed it to her father in his workroom, he patted her on the head and told her that it was a very special flame indeed, but it was not a toy. “Fire is dangerous,” he said, “as is water, and as are the high winds that blow across the lands. Be careful with this present, Airyn. It is beautiful to look at, but not to touch.” Airyn took the lamp to her small bedroom and placed it on the hard floor. The sun had fallen by then, and her eyelids were slowly drooping. She curled up beside the lamp, watching it cast small, but interesting shadows across a small space of the floor around it. Finally, she fell asleep.
Airyn woke with a blistering pain running across her chest, and her screams brought her parents running immediately into her room. Immediately, Airyn’s father (a wind magician), used his magic in an attempt to put out the blaze, and had no choice but to leave his daughter with a burning scar that would mark her for life, as the flame ran across her chest before it was extinguished. That went by a little fast. What happened exactly? At one moment the lamp is standing on the hard floor with apparently nothing surrounding it, and the next Airyn gets fire on her skin?

Airyn's parents were capable of sending their daughter to the Ximax School of Water magic, and suggested that she learn from their tutors and magicians rather than receiving a mentor, and staying in Nybelmar. Again, this went by a little fast. Why would they send their child (and at the equivalent of 14, a child she still is) across a freaking  huge ocean to study with people not even of a different tribe, but of a completely different race? I mean, what kind of parents are they? If your parents had sent you away when you were 14, to a country so far away that you couldn't just pop over back home for the weekend, but had to wait for years and years before seeing them again, would you have liked that very much? They wanted their 26 year-old daughter to discover the world around her and were prepared to send her far away from home to do so, as they knew that she would be able to learn quickly, and would not waste her knowledge. Like I said... you don't do that to a child. Maybe if she was anywhere close to being adult, but at the equivalent of 14?

Ok, I have to get back to work now, I'll try and get around to the rest of your history later :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Gardener + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on January 30, 2009, 10:21:24 AM
Simonne, you are SO right.
I think I'm going to start this again and re-write everything. She'll still be a water mage, but a few things will be a bit different. Thanks for the help Simonne, your comments will definately affect the rewrite.  :grin:


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Gardener + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on January 31, 2009, 08:44:43 AM
Well I've rewritten most of her history and one or two other things. Hope it's better than before   :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / The Clumsy Fusspot
Post by: Airyn on February 04, 2009, 04:37:27 PM
*innocently bumping*

I haven't recieved any comments since Simonne's edit, and my tiny rewrite...  :(

Just wondering if I've got everything right


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / The Clumsy Fusspot
Post by: Mannix on February 04, 2009, 04:40:13 PM
I'll try and get a check in later tonight, Airyn. And if not the whole CD, I'll at least check your magic section, since you haven't had a magic check yet. :)



Edit: Macbeth wasn't too good at keeping my attention so I'm back sooner than I thought. I'm going to focus on you magic section for now. Look for the orange. :)

Airyn has skilfully mastered the first Sphere of magic at the Ximax School of Water Magic (There isn’t really a physical school of water magic. It is more a school of thought. The Ximaxian Magical Academy is where I think you mean.) , choosing to focus her teachings on the physical aspects of water. Her magical strength for this element lies in controlling the motions and appearance of water. (What do you mean by appearance of water?) She is able to make a small puddle expand to the size of a lake, (How does she do this? I guess she could shape the water to take up as much area as possible, but the size of a lake from a puddle seems impossible. Remember she can’t add water in the first sphere.) and can also make a waterfall freeze entirely. (Just pointing this out, freezing a waterfall would be a lot harder than freezing a still body of water. It would be harder to focus on and moving water would have more Wind ounia, wouldn’t it. Since movement is a property of Wind.) This took years of perfecting and learning, and Airyn was eager to do both,<~~(comma) as befitting of her tribe. Her favourite and strongest strength in this craft is the ability to move and shape water, not just to expand it. (Well expanding water would only be shaping it, so it would be using the same spell. That is unless you have thought of some other way to. And that is one of many reason why an explanation of how she casts her spells is needed.) She sometimes separates streams to make pathways to land on the other side, or will make rain spiral prettily as it falls. (That is a wonderful idea, but I don’t think it would be possible, at least using Shape Water. Focusing on the individual raindrops as they fall would just be too hard.) Airyn sees the beauty of water, not its dangerous side.

Since Airyn had no specific mentor to speak of, as she learnt her lessons from the academy's teachers, she follows the orthodox Ximaxian theory of Magic, like the elven understanding that her father holds for wind magic. (That bit is a bit confusing. Do you mean she follows the elven way of magic like her father, or she follows the Ximaxian while her father follows the elven one. Because the first one would be possible, you say she follows the Ximaxian just before. Either way, I think a re-wording would be good.) She was disappointed when her father could not take her as his apprentice, but he simply smiled and told her to follow her own dreams, and not to do things just because she may feel obligated to please someone other than herself.
The teacher's at the school took a liking to the elf, and constantly encouraged her to "look inside herself, and follow the feelings that presented themselves."
"Do not ever force your magic from you," (Magic seems like the wrong word to me. Magic doesn’t come from you. Maybe will would be a better word, as the application of your will is what causes the magical effects.) they said, "visualise it forming for you, and focus yourself on its shape. Control it that way." (I don’t really understand this part. Visualise what forming?)

Airyn has completely mastered three spells, and uses them with absolute confidence. She uses these spells as she likes, since she knows and understands when it is appropriate to use them. These spells are: Shape Water (Learnt in her third level with some struggle, but mere focus and training helped to perfect this spell), Ice Touch (Learnt in her second level with no struggle at all, but was merely surprised when she figured out what it took to perform the same spell she had in her first year at Ximax...), and finally Harmony. (I can’t find this spell. I’m not saying it isn’t possible though. I actually quite like you use of it, being the aid with meditation. But since I don’t think this is written up, a description of how she casts it is even more important. Calmness is a property of Wind, not Water though. I think Harmony would more likely be a Wind spell because of this. But, if you have an idea of how you can achieve, do tell.) By nature, Airyn is a peaceful being and uses this spell to meditate, and to calm any being's emotions and mind. She also uses this spell to control moods and emotions, but only when there is anger or frustration of some sort. Airyn will never permanently interfere with the mind, (Well she can’t actually permanently affect her mind, as sphere one effects are only temporary. She would have to be constantly casting the spell to do this, and that is never going to happen. Perhaps she has always been a bit dubious of magic affecting the mind, also explaining her focus on the physical side.) thus uses this spell in short bursts.

Airyn has taken many years to practice the casting for her water related spells. At the beginning of her training in this area, Airyn grew tired very quickly whilst casting it. She had some trouble in the casting of the spell, but not the spell itself, so her teachers recommended that she distance herself from company for a period of time to allow her to perfect her skills. Airyn sat down by a long river in Ximax, away from any of her peers, and placed her hand in the water. She found that her spell is better cast when she comes into contact with the subject, and eventually gained the stamina to control her casting. Now, Airyn simply focuses all of her strength will on her target, and lets her will bring the magic forward. (Again, magic doesn’t come from the mage, it is achieved with their will.) Airyn is capable of shaping and moving reasonable weights of water, and can lift up to 6 Hebs (Shape Water doesn’t allow the mage to lift the water, only shape it. That would require Sphere II.) (30 Kilos). (You don’t have to convert it for us. ;) Many of us do it automatically, then there are those who use the imperial system. And it’s just not Santharian. :P This also goes for all other measurements in this CD.) At first, she could only lift water that weight not much more than a small bucket. Heavier weights would rarely be moved great distances as Airyn fears loss of focus and causing accidents for those around her. Airyn cannot carry water for any longer than ten minutes, as the strength still tires her quickly.
It took little time for Airyn to master the changing of water to ice. Airyn uses this magic in her defense (Should she need it), and also to entertain young elves by freezing fountains or shaping water into small figures and freezing them. (I was just thinking about that before. I thought at first that it might be a way to make the effects more permanent, but I’m not too sure now. When you shape ice, it still reverts to original form. So I was going to ask a magic expert. And then there is also the problem of casting the spell, while still maintaining the shape of the water. That is impossible, so you would need two mages to do this.) Mastered by vigorous training, Airyn controls this spell with not more than a simple gesture of her hand. When she was first learning this spell, Airyn could not draw her eyes from her target or she would lose her concentration. This spell is one that Airyn fears the most, though it is the one that she is most confident with. Airyn takes great care to keep her target in one place, so as not to freeze anything of importance accidentally.
Airyn must use her hand to touch her target when using mind-related spells. She carefully presses a finger to the subject, and breathes deeply. This spell is the one that requires the most focus, and she uses just enough of this spell to send the subject into a temporary state of relaxation. This spell also has a tiring effect on Airyn. She must only use this spell once a day, or even once a week depending on the mass of people she uses it on (Crowds are a lot harder to cast spells on. It is a bit different to casting it on one target. I’d probably leave that part out.) , though she rarely uses it on crowds as it is nearly impossible for her to do.

Airyn can do all of the spells up to the third level in water magic, (This is actually impossible, there are infinite spells. A spell is merely an application the sphere of magic, so different applications mean different spells. Hmm, that’s not really explained too well, but I hope you go my meaning.) but she chooses to use these three in particular as, one, they are her favourite and, two, they are the first spells that she learnt in each level. They are of great importance to her, and are used as a way of remembering her time spent at Ximax.

Her favourite pastime is freezing things, and making water move in all sorts of directions and angles. She loves the combination of water and ice, and will spend hours on end watching the water move and freeze before her eyes. She also collects the dew from the grass and beads them along spiderwebs, much to the awe and amusement of those around her. (That’s Sphere II remember. She only affects the properties of the water ounia.) Sometimes these acts can draw small crowds, but she mostly performs her tricks deep in a forest, wherever there is a mass of water.

Airyn uses her water magic to help "feed" the plants that she grows for her work. (How? She can’t move water from a location to her plants, as that would be Sphere II) She believes that water is the giver of life, and proudly watches flowers and trees grow around her.



There are really two main things that needed to be changed. Firstly, we need to see an explanation of how she casts her spells. This is so we can make sure you have enough knowledge to RP with, as well as make sure any applications not already written up as spells are possible. Secondly, you need to make sure that she can only cast spells from Sphere I, as this is what you are limited to without admin approval. So things like collecting water is a no-no, as that would require Sphere II. Don't lose heart on the amount of comments I gave, and if this seems a bit hard. I'm not going to lie, magic is difficult at first; I only attempted a mage after about a year. But we are here to help and guide you. If you have any questions, please do ask. I'll change your posticon to the pencil for know, so remember to change it back when your done and ready for more comments. And make sure you colour all of your edits. Good luck.

Mannix


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / The Clumsy Fusspot
Post by: Airyn on February 04, 2009, 07:18:02 PM
Hey Mannix,

Ugh, I have to read Macbeth for my English class. I prefer Romeo and Juliet  :grin:
Well I read everything you edited, thanks for doing that by the way, and it makes a lot of sense. I found the Harmony spell... somewhere on here but I can't seem to remember where...

Hehe... yeah I had one of those idea-floods with the moving/shaping water thing  :grin:

Again, thanks for the edit


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / The Clumsy Fusspot
Post by: Mannix on February 04, 2009, 07:21:16 PM
No problem. Oh, and seems I forgot to chage your icon. Oh well doesn't really matter now I guess.

Mannix


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / The Clumsy Fusspot
Post by: Airyn on February 04, 2009, 08:05:01 PM
There ya go, hope everything makes sense now. I feel like I've missed a bit though...

Comments are always welcomed.


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / The Clumsy Fusspot
Post by: Airyn on February 12, 2009, 07:10:46 PM
*bump*

Just saving this from the second page  :)

As always, feel free to comment on anything


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / The Clumsy Fusspot
Post by: Mannix on February 12, 2009, 07:37:07 PM
Oh, sorry Airyn. I thought I had posted here already. I have a check all done for you, including more than enough to help you with your magic. But it's on my laptop, so I can't post it right now. I'll get it up ASAP; the weekend at the latest. Hope you don't mind a little wait. :)

Mannix


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / The Clumsy Fusspot
Post by: Airyn on February 12, 2009, 08:15:06 PM
No, you have done already and thanks heaps.
Sorry if im being a bit demanding, I don't mean to be. I just dont know what to edit  :grin:
The wait's fine, I don't mind  :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on February 18, 2009, 07:24:15 PM
It's been a while without comments, and I now find myself with nothing to edit *grin*

I'd really appreciate it if someone looked over this for me  :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Rookie Brownbark on February 18, 2009, 07:26:04 PM
Hey Airyn, if you've been waiting for comments for more than 3 days there is a thread where you can bring this to the CD mods (and everyone else's) attention.  It's called "Character Descriptions in Waiting" and it's at the top of this forum :).


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on February 18, 2009, 07:31:44 PM
Okay, thankyou heaps  :)

I just didn't want to seem impatient though I think I seem to be already.



Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Rookie Brownbark on February 18, 2009, 07:34:25 PM
No worries, you seem fairly patient to me!  You just missed the place where you're more likely to get some action.

*points to the Character Descriptions in Waiting thread* Go post! ;)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Simonne Miller on February 19, 2009, 12:42:42 AM
Hi Airyn!

I read through your CD and already it feels a lot more... elfy... than the previous version. There are a few things though that I wondered about as I read.

Being from Nybelmar, why did so many of her family attend the Ximax academy? It's not a very obvious choice, and while the academy is very famous in Sarvonia, I'm not sure just how much people from Nybelmar would know about it, especially a tribe of elves that hardly ever leaves their jungle behind...

Then, you have her realise she wants to know water magic when she is 24, and then when she is 34 or thereabouts, in the class, she realises it all over again? Perhaps you could change that into her realising that she really did make the right choice for the type of magic?

About the bird swooping down, I'm having a bit of trouble understanding why any bird would randomly attack someone who didn't do anything to offend them, as far as I can see. About the other bird, the wood owl... no matter how hungry wood owls are, I doubt they are going to eat bread. Also, running is not their way of hunting (they are singularily NOT built for running! I doubt they could put one paw in front of the other even if they wanted to ;))

And one last thing... what you described is not the way it works. At least I don't think it does. Gifted people find out that they can do magic when they are under heavy emotional stress. I have not yet heard about anyone accomplishing a spell that they had not learned just by concentrating. Although, I'd ask a magic expert about this if I were you because I'm honestly not sure about that ;)

Hope that helps you a little!

Simonne


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Twén Aråerwén on February 19, 2009, 02:44:31 AM
Hello Airyn and welcome to Santharia! I will start with your magic section and give you some other pointers at the end.
Quote
Airyn has skilfully mastered the first Sphere of magic at the Ximax Academy of Magic, choosing to focus her teachings on the physical aspects of water. Her magical strength for this element lies in controlling the motions of water. She is able to make a small puddle ripple and move as a large body of water would, and can also make any body of water (As a sI using mage she can only affect a single car'all, in this case an area car'all, since you are not speaking of a specific object. Hence the maximum area affected would be around 4 ped.) , within reason, freeze entirely. This took years of perfecting and learning, and Airyn was eager to do both, as befitting of her tribe. Her favourite and strongest strength in this craft is the ability to move and shape water. She sometimes separates streams to make pathways to land on the other side, or will make the water from her mother's washing bucket move in amusing shapes and angles. Airyn sees the beauty of water, not its dangerous side.

Since Airyn had no specific mentor to speak of, as she learnt her lessons from the academy's teachers, she follows the orthodox Ximaxian theory of Magic, the same as the understanding that her father holds for wind magic. She was disappointed when her father could not take her as his apprentice, but he simply smiled and told her to follow her own dreams, and not to do things just because she may feel obligated to please someone other than herself.
The teacher's at the school took a liking to the elf, and constantly encouraged her to "look inside herself, and follow the feelings that presented themselves."<-This entire paragraph is more like history than a magic section.
"Do not ever force your will from you," they said, "and focus yourself on the form that you want it to create. Control it that way."

Airyn has completely mastered three spells, and uses them with absolute confidence. She uses these spells as she likes, since she knows and understands when it is appropriate to use them. These spells are: Shape Water (Learnt in her third level with some struggle, but mere focus and training helped to perfect this spell), Ice Touch (Learnt in her second level with no struggle at all, but was merely surprised when she figured out what it took to perform the same spell she had in her first year at Ximax...), and finally Calmness. By nature, Airyn is a peaceful being and uses this spell to meditate, and to calm any being's emotions and mind. Her father taught her this spell, saying that it would be a good experience to learn a spell from another element.<-It is not possible for a mage to learn spells from other elements. Various elements have contradictory ways of thinking and makes the casting of other elements impossible, as this would destroy the mages 'will' to influence a car'all. This took her some time to master, as there is some difference between wind and water magic, and she was not all that confident to begin training it. She also uses this spell to control moods and emotions, but only when there is anger or frustration of some sort. Airyn will never interfere with the mind for long periods of time, thus uses this spell in short bursts.<-All sI incantations require the focus of the caster and cease to exist once their concentration is broken.

Airyn has taken many years to practice the casting for her water related spells. At the beginning of her training in this area, Airyn grew tired very quickly whilst casting it. She had some trouble in the casting of the spell, but not the spell itself, so her teachers recommended that she distance herself from company for a period of time to allow her to perfect her skills. Airyn sat down by a long river in Ximax, away from any of her peers, and placed her hand in the water. She found that her spell is better cast when she comes into contact with the subject, and eventually gained the stamina to control her casting. Now, Airyn simply focuses all of her will on her target, and lets it bring the magic forward. Airyn is capable of shaping and moving reasonable weights of water, and can manage up to 6 Hebs. At first, she could only control water that weight not much more than a small bucket. Heavier weights would rarely be moved for long periods of time, as Airyn fears loss of focus and causing accidents for those around her. Airyn cannot focus herself on casting these kinds of water-related spells for any longer than ten minutes, as the strength it uses still tires her quickly.<-Ten minutes is an exceptional amount of time for a mage of this level to focus their will on an incantation. Though exceptional it is not impossible.
It took little time for Airyn to master the changing of water to ice. Airyn uses this magic in her defense (Should she need it), and also to entertain young elves by freezing fountains or freezing small bodies of water for the children to slide across. Mastered by vigorous training, Airyn controls this spell with not more than a simple gesture of her hand. When she was first learning this spell, Airyn could not draw her eyes from her target or she would lose her concentration. This spell is one that Airyn fears the most, though it is the one that she is most confident with.<-At her level she would need to keep her eyes on what she is doing, as well as remain focused. Airyn takes great care to keep her target in one place, so as not to freeze anything of importance accidentally.
Airyn must use her hand to touch her target when using mind-related spells. She carefully presses a finger to the subject, and breathes deeply. This spell is the one that requires the most focus, and she uses just enough of this spell to send the subject into a temporary state of relaxation. This spell also has a tiring effect on Airyn. She must only use this spell once a day, or even once a week depending on the number of people she uses it on. You confuse me throughout this magic section as you clearly stated above that her father taught her wind magic. Yet within this entire section you quote using the Calm spell to influence emotions, which is water magic. You need to go through the ENTIRE magic section and remove any indication your character can cast wind magic. This is not possible.

Airyn only uses these three spells as, one, they are her favourite and, two, they are the first (water) spells that she learnt. Her calmness spell is one of her favourites as she appreciates the dedication her father showed in trying to teach it to her. They are of great importance to her, and are used as a way of remembering her time spent at Ximax. Her defensive spells are only used when she feels threatened in any way; whether it be by a single person or a situation. As she can have quite a cheeky nature, her spells are mostly to promote entertainment for not only herself but the people around her. She is only serious with her magic when casing, and deciding what to use magic on. She could cast spells in a spur-of-the-moment act, or could take time to decide what she will do and where she will do it. It all depends on her frame of mind at the time.<-Most 1-3 lvl mages require time to cast their spells, it is a product of their still budding abilities and understanding of their craft.

Her favourite pastime is freezing things, and making water move in all sorts of directions and angles. She loves the combination of water and ice, and will spend hours on end watching the water move and freeze before her eyes.<-If she is moving and freezing water for hours on end, her will would be exhausted long before this time. She often chooses to perform her tricks near a large body of water, rather than just puddles and ponds as it is easier for her to concentrate.

Airyn strongly believes that water is the'"giver of life", and takes a lot of pride in her spells and the things she uses them for.
Well first off, you should understand that if her father taught her wind magic or the principals of it, this would make learning water more difficult once she reached Ximax. Basically they would need to reteach her in the ways of observing the car'all. Secondly, your character influences water ounia by strengthening and weakening water's properties. I see no mention of this throughout your entire magic section. Here are some links to some reading that may help you understand the system more.
Useful Links
 Properties Discussion  (http://www.santharia.com/dev/index.php?topic=10651.0)
 Interesting Read for beginning Magi  (http://www.santharia.com/dev/index.php?topic=10654.0)
 Cutting edge but not completely fact  (http://www.santharia.com/dev/index.php?topic=10638.0)
 -Ounia-  (http://www.santharia.com/dev/index.php?topic=10582.0)
 Cár'áll, Magical Aura (http://santharia.com/magic/car_all.htm)

My second concern is the Likes+Dislikes list you have made. This entire section should be added in paragraph form to the personality section. As this is simply a list of personality quirks for your character.

I hope this helps you with gaining your title soon. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask them, as there are many about willing to help you. I have changed the icon to the pencil until you are done editing. Please return the exclamation mark once you have finished.
~Sincerely~
Cáo fá cár'tuulén: Twen Araerwen


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on February 22, 2009, 07:52:48 PM
I hope that's better  :)

Thankyou to Simonne and Twen for correcting my mistakes, and I hope the bit (which is ever-so-small) about ounia is alright. It took a few reads for it to sink in properly  :)

All done and ready for comments


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Simonne Miller on February 24, 2009, 03:28:47 AM
Oh, one more thing I forgot to mention last time. At the moment you're living in Nybelmar, correct? That's not really very handy, since there's not even one story set there. You'd actually need to come back to Santharia if you want to get into a story, i'm afraid...


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on February 25, 2009, 08:43:05 AM
Oh, rightio then. That's a downer.

Ah well, all sorted,

Thanks Simonne  :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Azhira Styralias on February 26, 2009, 11:23:01 PM
Hi Airyn, you will need a special section for your familiar. Usually, you would describe the dog's habits, personality, appearance and its relationship to you. If its just a simple dog, then you don't need to get too detailed. Simply take what is in your history and move it to a separate section.

Our beast and familiar mod, Garret, can help in this regard.

Other wise, I think the rest of the CD looks good!  :thumbup:


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on February 27, 2009, 09:48:19 PM
Thanks Azhia  :)

All changes made and coloured.


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Garret Arroway on February 28, 2009, 02:06:16 PM
Alright, looks like you've managed to get it filled out before I finally found my way over here today. Sorry for the delay. I'll go through, make notes on some formattin' things and mention anythin' I see outta place anyways. Also, make sure ya put spaces between paragraphs here as well. While its smaller sections, it still gets a bit tricky when bunched together like that.

Familiar
Name: Sage

Gender: Male

Age: Unknown by Airyn, but his lean body and constant energy suggests that he is aged between two and four years of age.
     (Even if Airyn doesn't know the dog's age you as the writer do, just like with your character's own age. Ex. "<Insert Age Here> (Unknown by Airyn - Believed to be between 2 & 4)". It's simple, compact, and gives us all the information. While showing the true age is requested, the formattin' suggestion is optional, I just encourage certain formats, which would be short, compact answers for sections I call "List Sections", and detailed answers for the other ones.)

Breed: Dog

Type: Rimrunner
     (Alright, just bumping these up here as it makes it easier to read if you keep the listed stuff at the top and larger paragraphs at the bottom, makin' it look like a mini-cd.)

Height:
Weight:
Length:
Fur Color:
Eye Color:
     (These things could either be listed here or added to the appearance, though I ask that they be present somewhere as it allows people to kinda picture the size of the dog compared to something else. I see you have fur color, but that’s about it of the things listed.)

Appearance: Sage’s white coat is often covered in dirt, giving it a grey or brown appearance. His long coat is often found on the floor (Found on the floor? He can take his coat off? Do you mean draggin' on the floor when he walks?) of Airyn’s house, and his small paws regularly leave muddy pawprints wherever he walks. Sage has slightly small ears, with the one on the left slightly bent out of shape; however the cause of this is unknown (Your character doesn't have to know this, but I'm slightly intrigued as to why the animal's ear is that way.). He has a reasonably small snout with a wide nose. He has a constant appearance of happiness and content written on his face, though he often curls his lips back into a fierce snarl, revealing rows of sharp canine teeth, at anything he is unsure of. 

Personality/Habits: Sage is heavily afraid of the unknown. He pulls his lips back into a snarl at a slight movement or entrance to the room by a stranger. Airyn figured that his hostility towards the unknown was from his time without or away from his previous owner. The dog is extremely loyal, and very protective. He follows his mistress almost everywhere, and refuses to be alone for any longer than ten minutes.

He is not overly picky of his meals, being fed anything that his owner doesn’t eat, but has taken a liking for the taste of chicken (with out bones I hope?).

Sage is an early riser, and sits, whining, at the foot of Airyn’s bed until he is taken for a walk in the morning. This ritual is performed every day, and his whine turns into an impatient bark when he is ignored.

He is bright-spirited and also cunning; never stopping until some sort of decision is made that involves him and receiving attention. Sage craves three things: affection, outside, and the space next to his mistress on the couch at the end of the day.

History: It was when Airyn was walking to one of the city’s inns; she came across a small dog. It was white with long fur, and no collar around its neck or anything to identify its owner or its name. The dog cocked its head to one side when she slowly bent down to scratch it behind the ear. It let out a soft growl when her hand advanced, but stood still as her skin touched its fur. Airyn gently picked up the small dog, and began to walk back towards the school where her small house stood nearby.

Three or four days had passed, and no one had made any mention of the missing Rimrunner. The elf had grown quite fond of the dog, and was unwilling to let him go. She had already given him a name, and he seemed to be more than happy to respond.

Sage’s history before the day when Airyn found him is somewhat blurred. He has some memories of his previous owner – someone who treated him well and fed him heartily. He remembers being left to run across a field, the wind blowing through his fur and the taste of grass on his tongue, and finally ending in the backstreets of... somewhere... and being approached by someone who smelled a lot like flowers...

(What about since she's had him? Anything happen worth mentionin'? What was the dog's history before he was found by your character?)

Alright, good job so far. There are a few more things I'd like to see added and a couple questions answered, but your on the right track.

Garret


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on February 28, 2009, 04:30:38 PM
All done Garret, thanks for the edit.

Yes, the chicken has no bones :)
His hair is found on the floor from malting... you know how dogs with long hair malt quite often. My dog has long hair   :grin:


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Garret Arroway on February 28, 2009, 04:33:00 PM
Looks good to me and the whole sheding hair thing didn't come to mind due to the way it was worded, though it looks better now. :) Good job.


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on February 28, 2009, 04:33:45 PM
Sweet. Thanks  :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Fu Luft on March 01, 2009, 08:39:40 AM
Hi Airyn,

And welcome to Santharia from a fellow wizard! Great to see a brave lady who isn’t afraid to tackle one of the most complicated aspects of this fantasy world. I’m relatively new, and not a magic expert by far, but I thought I’d give my half-a-sans worth. So here goes:

One of the three spells you list, “Skin of Painlessness”, is not actually properly described in the compendium. It only appears with a short paragraph in the Water Magic Overview, but hasn’t got its own entry yet. I think that means it's unusable in roleplay. (Among other things, “Painlessness” doesn’t have an assigned level, so we don’t know whether your Level III mage could have mastered it.) An alternative that would fit to your character, I think, may be the “Calm” spell. This would also have the advantage that it’s Level I, whereas your other two spells are of higher levels. You write that Airyn likes her spells because they are the first she learned, but she would definitely need to have started with a Level I spell.

Oh, I just see from Twen’s comments that you initially did have the Calm spell in an earlier draft. I see no reason why you shouldn’t use it, and I don't think that Twen meant to imply that you couldn't. "Calm" is a Water spell, and hence from your chosen element. To be sure, "Calm" is from the spiritual representation of water, rather than the physical representation, but it's perfectly fine to have spells from both the physical and the spiritual representations of your element.

In general, I found your magic section a bit confusing at times. Sometimes I didn’t understand which spell you were talking about in a particular sentence. Maybe you've changed it so much in response to earlier comments that it's become a bit incoherent. It may be worth rearranging your magic section so that each of your three spells has its own paragraph. For a good example, have a look at Azhira’s CD (you can find it by clicking on the link in her signature). It’s a model of clarity, and I used it as an example myself when I wrote my own magic section.

In your “Strengths” Section you write:
Quote
As a skilled water mage, Airyn has taken each and every day since her tenth birthday to learn the ways of magic
As you know, ten is too young to start studying magic, especially for an elf. You need to bring this sentence up to date with the history section, where Airyn (correctly) is said to have started studying magic in her twenties.

By the way, I think you could get away with knowing a few more spells than three, if you wanted – especially if Airyn would be less than perfect at some additional spells. My own wizard is not even one full day into his first story, but has already had occasion to use three different spells (of the seven he has mastered). It’s been fun!

I hope this helps a bit. Good luck with the approval process!

Sincerely, Fu


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on March 01, 2009, 08:23:03 PM
Thankyou, Fu for pointing out my mistakes, I don't think I would have realised.

I guess I think that I don't want my character to be 'perfect'. For balance, I want her a little flawed and favour of three spells sort of gives that balance. She knows other spells, but they are mostly offensive and that's against her nature.

I would also like to see how she grows, and how her magic use grows, during the roleplay if that's allowed. It'll be fun to see what kind of sticky situations call for magic.

I hope everything makes sense now, thankyou for letting me know.


 :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Fu Luft on March 02, 2009, 03:28:54 AM
I think your magic section has definitely improved. I leave it to the experts to have another look.

Just a few quick notes:

When you mention the spell "Harmony", I guess you mean (click here: ) this spell (http://www.santharia.com/magic/water_spells/1_calm.htm)? It's called "Calm" in its own entry, even though "Harmony", as mentioned in the Water Magic Overview (http://www.santharia.com/magic/water_magic.htm), is probably intended to be the same thing. I'd advise you to call it 'Calm' in your CD, because that will make it easier, later, for other players to look up the spell if they want to read up on your abilities.  ;)

You've still got the "tenth birthday" thing at the beginning of your strengths section, which I pointed out before.  :)

I like that you think about limiting your abilities, and about your potential for growth. Just remember that learning a single spell may take many months of study under expert guidance, so it may be difficult to incorporate substantial improvement into a story that you're playing in. Not so easy to learn new tricks while you're on the go! But as I say, up to you.

All best, Fu




Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Azhira Styralias on March 02, 2009, 12:43:27 PM
Hi Airyn! Your CD looks great so far. I do like the new familiar section and I am sure Garret will have a look at it soon. I have some comments on your magic section as I consider it one of my specialties.

Magic
Airyn has skilfully mastered the first Sphere of magic at the Ximax Academy of Magic, choosing to focus her interest on both the physical and the spiritual aspects of water.  Her desire for peace and a cheeky need of entertainment led her to the element. She is enchanted by water, and the forms it can take; admiring its beauty and understanding its restlessness. Airyn is capable of influencing the ounia of the element to create a change in its appearance and position. She can also alter it to influence someone’s mind.

Airyn does not use her magic to replace weapons. She hates any kind of fighting, and refuses to use her magic for those situations – even in her own defence. Airyn relies on her bodily strength and willpower to escape a troublesome situation. She knows more spells than the ones she favours, but they are ones that are used to harm or manipulate a person; both of which Airyn is strongly against doing.

Airyn has had no mentor, aside from the magicians and the lecturers at the Ximax Academy. Her father provided her inspiration to learn magic, and her determination and indifference led her to study the element of water. It was during her time spent at Ximax that she discovered that her strength lay with the physical, and most exciting, aspect of water magic.

The sphere of change enables her to influence water’s caráll to change water into ice with the touch of her open palm (What you are doing here is lowering the temperature of the water's ounia to create the ice. Realize that gestures and an open palm are not required to cast magic, but if you use your hand as a focus, be sure to mention it.). She has learnt (learned) how to control the thickness of the ice that she spreads over the water’s surface, and has only used it against a person once, during the lesson which called for her to use an offensive spell on a target. (<-- How exactly did you use this ability offensively? Give an example). Anything covered with water, or anything with water on it, has the ability to be frozen by the touch of her skin and fierce concentration. (<-- Remember, everything has water ounia in it. Living things and non-living things. The real skill lies in influencing the ounia no matter how much of it an object has. Freezing water is considered easy as water obviously has alot of water ounia. Freezing a rock is much harder as the water ounia in stone is much less. A living person or animal would have an abundant amount of water ounia so you can actually freeze internal organs or skin. Imagine that kind of power!) Though this spell is the one that Airyn is the most comfortable with, it is the one that she fears the most. Airyn takes great care to keep her target in one place, so as not to freeze anything of importance accidentally.

Since Airyn deals with a range of negative emotions in her profession, she uses the spell Harmony to influence her patient’s frame of mind when she places two fingers on a piece of open skin. She finds that it causes her less grief later on in the day, if she makes her subject feel at ease with whatever situation they might be in that called for her aid. Spiritual spells are harder for her to cast, and require more focus, as she fears making a mistake. Airyn cannot permanently influence the mind, but she is capable of sending someone into a trance-like state, where they have no knowledge of the natural emotions, such as danger or fear. Airyn just tries to make someone comfortable and calm. She doesn’t like to go overboard in controlling their emotions, she influences it just enough for her to do her job and move on to the next person.

(Spiritual influence is not as difficult. You simply have to tune yourself into the non-physical aspect of the target, the spiritual aspect. Emotions can be chaotic and by influencing the spiritual water aspect, you can either turn a chaotic mind into a calm wave or give chaos to stillness. Of course, Sphere I could never influence a mind for long, and never permanently, but you could do enough to distract someone or calm an angry person.)

Shape Water doesn’t exactly come in handy all the time, but it is the last and final spell that Airyn has developed a liking for. She simply has to place a hand in a mass of water and focus her will on influencing the car’all of the element.
 This spell didn’t take as long to learn to cast as Harmony did, but she still finds it tricky to cast as it is the spell that tires her the most. Mostly she uses it to redirect the water’s flow, when it rains or when a bucket is spilled for example, but she just likes to watch it ripple and move as she creates shapes and bends it in different angles.

Spell casting always has an affect on Airyn, no matter how small the spell. Each time she uses magic, it has a tiring effect on her, resulting in her becoming drowsy and sometimes dizzy. Physical spells allow her more control and enable her to use them for at least five minutes before they take their effect, but spiritual spells require the most concentration and willpower. Airyn uses more of her will to use spells that alter the mind, as she fears loss of control. They cannot be used for very long, and she only uses it when she is talking to her patients. Constant training has enabled her to extend her use to about three minutes, five at the most, but she needs to take breaks in between her casting. (<-- If spell casting causes this kind of effect on you, you may with to mention it as a weakness for you.)

Her favourite pastime is freezing things, and making water move in all sorts of directions and angles. She loves the combination of water and ice, and would be more than willing to spend hours on end watching the water move and freeze before her eyes if it did not have such an effect on her. She often chooses to perform her tricks near a large body of water, rather than just puddles and ponds as it is easier for her to concentrate in the silence and peace of a secluded area, rather than the bustle of the city.

(Overall, a nice and simply magic section. With imagination, you can find many uses for your skills other than what you mention here.  :thumbup:)

Go ahead and make some of these tweaks. I'll give you a First Approval now, though.  :nod:


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on March 02, 2009, 06:30:53 PM
*Does the 'happy dance' and giggles uncontrollably*

Yay, awesome!

I'll get right to the magic section and sorry Fu, I completely forgot about that little bit in the S&W section.  :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Eléyr Fásamár on March 03, 2009, 12:25:07 PM
Alright Airyn, good job!

~Second Approval~


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Kalína Dalá'isyrás on March 03, 2009, 01:03:48 PM
Go ahead and remove the color from your changes. You can keep the color for the titles of the categories :)

Let me know when that is done and I shall title and archive ya :)


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Airyn on March 03, 2009, 02:25:19 PM
Thankyou HEAPS everyone   :grin:


Title: Re: Airyn / Kay’rrhem / Healer + Water Mage
Post by: Kalína Dalá'isyrás on March 03, 2009, 07:21:53 PM
Alrighty! You are titled now, hun. And this CD shall go to the Archives! Happy story hunting :)