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Author Topic: Vorni Firebreath / Tenthrum Clan / Earth-Guide  (Read 3930 times)
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Vorni Firebreath
Brown Grubstaker
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Dwarf, Tenthrum


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« on: December 24, 2006, 07:14:17 AM »

Basic Description:

Name: Vorni Firebreath
Gender: Male
Race: Dwarf (Theregrim)
Age: 173
Tribe: Tenthrum Clan
Occupation: Earth-Guide
Title: The Brown Grubstaker
Eye Color: Burnt Saphire Blue
Hair Color: Onyx Black
Height: 1 Ped, 1 Fore
Weight: 2 Pygges, 1 Heb, 1 Hafeb
Character Portrait: ?

Detailed Description:

Overview: A jet-black bearded dwarf of middle-years, with a more than curious tan about him.  Many scars tell of a rugged life, and his large lop-sided grin seems to reveal a good-natured soul.  He's a tad rough around the edges, but overall, a dwarf of his honor.

Physical Appearance:  Vorni Firebreath is, with the fullness of his hair, one ped and a fore tall.  He has jet-black hair covering his scalp which is rather wavy and cuts off very short in the back, in a well-trimmed manner.  He has a jet-black beard, the pride of all dwarves, which stretches for two fores, showing his middle-age.  He is slightly more muscular than the average dwarf, and possesses a olive tan. Along his body are a number of scars, from a score of lash-marks on his back, to knife cuts and a curious scar over his kidney that looks as though he was punctured deeply by something.  He has more wrinkles than a dwarf of his age rightly should.

Clothes: Vorni is adorned in worn brown leather travelling boots, and thick dyed-green leather leggings.  He has a dark green cotton shirt which is covered by a leather breastplate, which has the look of fine dwarven craftsmanship. 

Personality:  When you ask who Vorni Firebreath is, the first thing you must ask is...where is the fun?  From a very early age, Vorni had a rather unhealthy love of adventuring beyond the clan caverns to look for splendid cut rocks, and to discover new things in the depths of the world.  As he grew older, he took to adventuring outside of the caverns, and found a love of companionship in races other than dwarves.  He didn't trust them as he would a dwarf, of course, but he enjoyed talking to the outside world.  He enjoyed interaction, trade, and ale.  In fact...he enjoyed a lot of ale.  His main calling was to anything that he found which was adventurous or relatively undiscovered;  anything that represented a thrill.  With this also came a certain level of chivalrism, Vorni was never afraid to help others without reward, as long as it required him to do something dangerous, or relatively novel.  He is also an extremely generous soul, being that he gave most of what rewards he did earn, and what wages he garnered from his work in the mines, to his friends in the form of ale and mead.  Vorni has also been very much renowned for giving more than a fair share of his wages to children and parents of the Clan. 

Vorni hence is a generous, fool-hardy, adventerous, daredevil, alcoholic, sometimes overbearing dwarf, never too slow to make new friends, and far far slower to give up old ones.   With his adventerous nature, Vorni has been known to be inconsiderate on many occasions.  He's never stolen a penny from anyone, but he has on happenstance left the clan without a word, only to turn up a week later in the deepest part of the Tenthrum mines, unconscious and coincidentally out of ale. 

Strengths and Weaknesses:

a) Strengths - Vorni is honorable, loyal, chivalristic, and fearless (save in the face of the supernatural), he is charismatic when he comes off correctly. He is rather physically strong, having spent much of his youth climbing through the mines and having honed his strength in many a friendly wreslting match with other dwarves.  He possesses, as all earth-guides do, an uncannily acute sense of direction...save when he's drunk.  He is quite generous to strangers, and extremely generous to friends.  Vorni is skilled with an axe, primarily from a need for basic hunting and fighting skills from being in the depths of the world.  He is capable of moderate hunting skills.  Through his recent acquaintances with teasure hunters and manlings of a most disparate nature, Vorni has also learned basic combat skills with his axe.  Vorni is adept at wrestling from his youth.

b) Weaknesses - Where Vorni is honorable, he is also stubborn.  Where he is loyal, he is also blind to the faults of his friends.  Where he is chivalristic, he is also extremely fool-hardy in taking on errands.  Where he is fearless, he is wreckless with his own life.  Where some may see him as charismatic, many others might see him as overbearing and talkative.  Where he gained physical strength in his youth, he now has suffered three breaks to his left leg, a broken wrist, scars long his head from close bumps, a rock punctured his side once when he fell, he's broken his arm once in a wrestling match, and he's had his nose broken once in a fight with a floor as he descended ever close to it.  Vorni's alcoholism has given him somewhat of a groggy recollection of many of his nights, and his love of smoking has given him very bad endurance for running.  He also sleeps as all alocholics sleep...like a rock.   Vorni is also very quick-tempered about certain subjects, as most dwarves are.   He is generous to almost everyone when it comes to drinking, and charity.  Hence, he is very very poor.

History:  I will first address the things that will seem odd for a dwarf to have:  Vorni's generosity is unusual of the common dwarf of legend; the miser.  Vorni is so generous because he was orphaned at a very young age.  His father died in a very unfortunate mining accident that involved tapping into an underground lake from the bottom-end; his father was alone that night, and drowned. Prior to this, his mother died giving birth to him.   Vorni always missed his parents, who died when he was still too young to really remember them.  He was raised by his clan, and remained poor through all his youth.  Because of this, he feels a special bond with families struggling to raise their children, and is very generous with his money to any such pesron in need.  Also, due to his lack of a direct family, he has always taken to being very close to his clan-members, so he makes friends easily, and he loves to celebrate almost anything worth mention, making him quite popular with dwarves who appreciate a good brew.

The next aspect of interest would be Vorni's love of travelling, where most dwarves choose to stay secluded for the better part of their lives.  It is well known that Tenthrum have a liberal streak in them.  Consequently, it wasn't seen as too horribly odd when Vorni, as a strapping youth, took off to route around in the depths of the caverns.  Having no parents, no one really reprimanded him for this, in fact, his teachers would often encourage him to learn the depths more thoroughly for his earth-guide training.

During his Wirrutharoon Vorni's wirrut was to draw a complete map of the caverns surrounding Clan Tenthrum for several miles, indicating all the pools, mines, best game-spots, and any other significants land-marks.  He passed quite wonderfully.  Vorni has never truly had interest in a mate, even though he is well beyond his baregozar.  After his coming of maturity, Vorni took to seeking the farthest caverns of the Rimmerins region, and he took to looking above the ground as well.

Once he began venturing above the ground Vorni stopped at every tavern in every local town in the entire region, getting well acquainted with the people above and below the ground.  At this point in Vorni's life, he became thirsty for some adventure outside of his clan, and he has now started taking to taverns in search of treasure hunters who wish to go into the depths.

As Vorni ventured into these towns, he found himself in a number of brawls in taverns due to people insulting his clan, or making comments about his beard.   Sometimes a drunken man says the wrong thing to a dwarf.

For his unusually charitable actions towards children and parents in Clan Tenthrum and his odd tan from being topside, he has become titled, "the Brown Grubstaker" (grubstaker - Supplies or funds advanced to a mining prospector or a person starting a business in return for a promised share of the profits.)

Weapons:  Vorni has one weapon; a fine dwarven steel axe, which he bought from a good clan-mate and drinking buddy for a very reasonable price.   That price, though reasonable, still drained most of Vorni's already depleted savings.

Belongings: Vorni inherited his grandfather's fine leather armor, who was a rather famous hunter of the Tenthrum clan, but the armor is admittedly somewhat worn with age.  He has a baroomith that belonged to his mother, which he guards fiercely.  And he has the only thing of his father's that the miner's had left, his Chingu. He also has a stabstick in his pack, his pack itself, a belt-knife, a ladle, and a crusher.

Familiars:  Vorni is quite intrigued by the ideas of a bat-familiar, but as he isn't a Singspeaker, he's yet to find a way to communicate with bats.   Perhaps sometime soon he'll find a way to have a familiar, which due to his orphanage and long dark hours alone in the mines, he has always wanted.

« Last Edit: December 25, 2006, 06:08:42 PM by Vorni Firebreath » Logged

Have your eyes seen the vast underground lakes deeper than a mountain is tall?  Or the chasms that descend to the Flint-Lord himself? And the UnSthommerons' fire as it flows in a molten river back to our beginning? - Excerpt from a Tenthrum Earth-Guide Prayer Vorni's CD
Thróg'Shireníc
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Elf, Melad'rhim


« Reply #1 on: December 24, 2006, 08:51:21 AM »

1. The first thing i would like to ask is that a change to the overview is necessary because a overview is just an overlook of your overall character personality in 1-3 sentences.

2. Also you need to add clothes into his physical appearence because physical appearence is anything we would be able to see on him which means eyes, hair, clothes, etc.

3. Also, how does one make money as a earth-guide? by guiding people in caves, guiding them through valleys, or etc.?

4. Actually all of the breaks wouldn't be weaknesses, they would actually be strengths. This is because science has proved that breaking a bone and letting it repair makes it stronger than before which is why people who have broken a bone don't feel as much pain.

5. Some of the things located in the belongings section is not located in the history section as how they were obtained and when they were obtained.

7. One final thing is you don't have to have a familiar or a character portrait so since these are not included they should not be listed
Logged

May this bless all who read it with what it holds:

Sé ilian thelduin onr líf un mor'ranr thelduin onr freohr.
Vorni Firebreath
Brown Grubstaker
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Gender: Male
Posts: 17


Dwarf, Tenthrum


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« Reply #2 on: December 24, 2006, 09:55:01 AM »

Thank you greatly, Clurion.   I will adjust appropriately.

1)  I've lengthened my overview, and editted some gramar.

2)  I wonder, should the clothing be in the clothing section, or also included in the physical appearance? 

3)  As for making money as an earth-guide, he guides the folk of Clan Tenthrum and the occasional adventurer that offers him challenge.

4)  While the breaking of bones is followed up by a calicification in the healing, this hardly makes them stronger.  I've broken a few bones myself, and in their healing, one could easily find a fused joint.  And they always ache when the weather changes.

5)  The things located in the belonging section that have no mention are things that I considered of little consequence;  i.e., the stabstick, crusher, ladle, and beltknife.

6) I've added a character portrait.  Though I eventually intend to draw one of my own, this current one is borrowed from the now deceased Troika Studios' Arcanum.  I would also kindly ask the moderators if using a picture from a now-dead company is appropriate.  If it isn't, I wll change.

Thank you all!   Hope you have a Merry Christmas!
« Last Edit: December 24, 2006, 10:31:41 AM by Vorni Firebreath » Logged

Have your eyes seen the vast underground lakes deeper than a mountain is tall?  Or the chasms that descend to the Flint-Lord himself? And the UnSthommerons' fire as it flows in a molten river back to our beginning? - Excerpt from a Tenthrum Earth-Guide Prayer Vorni's CD
Thróg'Shireníc
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Posts: 152

Elf, Melad'rhim


« Reply #3 on: December 24, 2006, 12:28:37 PM »

Yes that i can everything is in order except one thing which you asked about and yes clothings is included on both clothings and physical appearence. Otherwise, just need a moderator or approved character to check you off.
Logged

May this bless all who read it with what it holds:

Sé ilian thelduin onr líf un mor'ranr thelduin onr freohr.
Twén Aråerwén
Death's Mistress
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Elf, Ifer’hém


« Reply #4 on: December 24, 2006, 04:01:44 PM »

Hello Vorni and welcome to Santharia! I have only a few comments for you.

Items in need of attention
1) There should be single spacing between the paragraphs in your history section.
2) You mention an ax he possesses if he knows how to use this, then it is a strength. It should be listed in that area with some examples of how skilled he is with it.
3) He is a Tenthrum not a Mitharim, though closely related they are indeed seperate tribes.

Overall it looks very well done, I do not see a title long in the waiting for you. :)
~Sincerely~
Cáo fá cár'tuulén:Twen Araerwen
Logged

•º•The spell fell upon the crowd like a dragon, •º•
•º•ancient and full of death.•º•
_.·´¯) Twén Aråerwén's CD(¯`·._
Vorni Firebreath
Brown Grubstaker
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Posts: 17


Dwarf, Tenthrum


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« Reply #5 on: December 24, 2006, 04:25:17 PM »

Yay!  Thank you Twen, and I appreciate the compliment.  It's nice to meet you!

I have spaced all the paragraphs, cleared up Vorni's very confused ethnic background, and I have added (in red highlight) his axe-wielding abilities to his Strengths area.
« Last Edit: December 24, 2006, 04:49:57 PM by Vorni Firebreath » Logged

Have your eyes seen the vast underground lakes deeper than a mountain is tall?  Or the chasms that descend to the Flint-Lord himself? And the UnSthommerons' fire as it flows in a molten river back to our beginning? - Excerpt from a Tenthrum Earth-Guide Prayer Vorni's CD
Twén Aråerwén
Death's Mistress
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Elf, Ifer’hém


« Reply #6 on: December 24, 2006, 04:45:45 PM »

Looks good to me Vorni! I would ask that you go over it once more to correct some grammatical mistakes, in your wait for a second approval. ~First approval~
Logged

•º•The spell fell upon the crowd like a dragon, •º•
•º•ancient and full of death.•º•
_.·´¯) Twén Aråerwén's CD(¯`·._
Vorni Firebreath
Brown Grubstaker
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Gender: Male
Posts: 17


Dwarf, Tenthrum


Homepage
« Reply #7 on: December 24, 2006, 05:10:13 PM »

I apologize, in the making of the entire thing, I was a tad bit jumbled in my thought.  I created it on the post itself.  I have gone over the post and corrected everything I could find.  The thoughts still seem fairly jumbled, but I hope that this is acceptable.  If you find many more such mistakes, I can rewrite the section of choice to make it more fluid and sequential.

I thank you for your approval, Twen.  Nice to meet you!

Merry Christmas Eve, everyone.  And all other happy holidays to you! 

I've changed my corrections for Twen to orange.  I didn't know where the color button was earlier.  :)  Happy Holidays!
« Last Edit: December 25, 2006, 04:44:50 AM by Vorni Firebreath » Logged

Have your eyes seen the vast underground lakes deeper than a mountain is tall?  Or the chasms that descend to the Flint-Lord himself? And the UnSthommerons' fire as it flows in a molten river back to our beginning? - Excerpt from a Tenthrum Earth-Guide Prayer Vorni's CD
Kalína Dalá'isyrás
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« Reply #8 on: December 25, 2006, 12:00:57 PM »

I say, we do not have enough dwarves on the board, but it is always a pleasure to read a well-written CD such as this one.

Well done! Second approval and title given. Just remove the color in the CD for moving to the Archives ^.^
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Insanity is only a perception made by those who have yet to attain its greatness. While those of us who have already stepped inside its bounds find bliss in our utter madness.
Nai'r en'Lina ar'Kaimel
Vorni Firebreath
Brown Grubstaker
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Dwarf, Tenthrum


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« Reply #9 on: December 25, 2006, 06:12:50 PM »

Yay!  Thank you for the compliments, Kalina.  I was very attracted to the dwarven RP for this game, as I'm usually far the opposite.  I've done lots of RP and fantasy, but this is the first real text based-RPG I've played.

Thank you for the approval!   

Merry Christmas!  Oh, and I've removed the orange from the CD.

P.S.  I love dragons, too.
« Last Edit: December 25, 2006, 06:25:31 PM by Vorni Firebreath » Logged

Have your eyes seen the vast underground lakes deeper than a mountain is tall?  Or the chasms that descend to the Flint-Lord himself? And the UnSthommerons' fire as it flows in a molten river back to our beginning? - Excerpt from a Tenthrum Earth-Guide Prayer Vorni's CD
Thorgas Ironforge
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« Reply #10 on: December 25, 2006, 07:19:54 PM »

Hello! Another dwarf, happy day indeed.  :D
Glad to see you titled. Though I have no comments since you are titled in an incredibly fast pace, all I want is to point out the words at the bottom of your portrait. It says 'dwarf, Theregrim' ; it should be 'dwarf, Tenthrum' as both dwarf and Theregrim means the same. Not a big thing but it would be nice if everything is in order.  grin
I hope to see you RP with the rest of the Theregrim in the Tavern.
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A weak mind is a deadly foe.
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