* 
Welcome Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?


*
gfxgfx Home Forum Help Search Calendar Login Register   gfxgfx
gfx gfx
gfx
Embed Maximize


Newbies, read these!

Character Creation
FAQs
Restrictions

Main Site
Portraits
Rules
Story Creation
Racial Crossbreeding
Magic

Contact
Tips and Tricks
IRC Chat
Measures Converter
Elven Aging Calculator
Pages: [1] 2 3   Go Down
Print
Author Topic: The Illiana Twins - Arthyron/Maeverhim - Hunter/Cook  (Read 12317 times)
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
The Illiana Twins
Traveling Kitchen
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 52


« on: February 23, 2008, 11:16:32 PM »

The Twins:


Name: Xander Illiana

Gender: Male

Age: 44 years old (Looks 20 years old, has the training of a 21 year old.)

Race: Elf

Tribe: Arthyron/Maeverhim (Mother is Arthyron, Father is Maeverhim)

Occupation: Hunter/Forager

Title: Traveling Kitchen

Appearance Section:
Height: 2 peds
Weight: 1 pygge
Hair Colour: Nor’sidian
Eye Colour: “Bavera’s Eye”

Physical Appearance:

Being of mixed blood, Xander inherited his father’s nor’sidian hair, and his mother’s emerald coloured eyes. His hair goes past his shoulders, often tied up in a low ponytail. Hidden in the depths of his hair, a lone earring dangles from one earlobe. A thin, elegant nose protrudes from his face, a testament of his Maeverhim heritage, although he did not inherit his father's black toenails. Lips generally turned up in a smile, a small twitch at the edge as if he’s laughing at something private. When he grins, straight white teeth are flashed in the direction of another, a warm welcome or greeting. A tattoo adorns his left arm, a variation of the many tribal tattoos he had seen in his travels with Nate. His whole stature is of wiry muscle, strong and quick, though he is nowhere near the size of someone who works out daily.

Clothing:

He wears a sleeveless shirt with baggy pants, both black to compliment his hair. Fitting gloves stay snug on his hands, black in colour as well. On his feet, heavy leather boots make their permanent home, durable enough to withstand wear and tear for a couple of months.

Should he have the privilege to attend an important function, he will just either borrow or buy a suit and sell it after it is used.

Personality:

Xander is a generally fun loving guy, especially enjoying the company of women. He would be the first to laugh at a joke, yet the last to take offense, unless it concerns his twin. Slow to anger, quick to please, he rarely has a harsh word to say to people. That is not to say that he doesn’t get angry. On the contrary, he has an awful temper, though he manages to keep it under wraps for the most part. He was raised as a polite elf, manners abound. “Pleases” and “Thank yous” are second nature to him, as is the constant consideration of other people’s feelings.

Although he may act childish or immature at times, Xander is actually a reasonable and mature man. As stated above, he seems to know how another is feeling, no matter how well they hide it. Often, should someone need to hide their emotions, they are feeling negatively. At these times, Xander will be the silent voice at your shoulder, giving you space, yet soothing you with his presence.

Should he be the one in depression, he rarely shows it, instead opting for a cheerful front. A bad habit of his is to keep everything bottled inside, hoping that it would go away by itself. Unsurprisingly, his twin will figure that his optimism is a sham, and urge him to open up. Unfortunately, that rarely happens.

He has something of a heroic streak, always wanting to be the knight in shining armour to a damsel in distress. However, as selfless as that may seem, the flip side is much more distressful. Often, caught up in the need to protect, he neglects his health and possible injuries, leaving them to fester.

Patience comes easily to him as optimism comes to his sister. It helps him in most cases, as he knows that some people need more time to grasp something, both mentally and physically. It was nurtured in while he trained in archery.

For all his merits, Xander does have a few bad points. For one, he has trouble saying no. He hates disappointing another person, and he may be easily taken advantaged of. For another, he often says things that make the perfect sense to him, yet offensive to others. It’s this uncanny knack, coupled with his sister’s sass that gets them both thrown into the town’s dungeon. Xander also has absolutely no respect for ranks or authority figures. Sure, he’ll obey the law, but he won’t think twice of disobeying a guard should said guard be a bastard. He respects people, not their station in the social service.

Strengths:

•   Weapon Skill (Archery) – Xander learnt this skill from his mother. She had been one of the crews in her time of sailing, and she imparted this skill to her son. He trains with this often, at least an hour every day.
•   Weapon Skill (Spear) – Also taught by his mother, the spear was the first weapon that he picked up. Unfortunately, he is not as skilled as with his bow. Put it this way, he's no expert, but neither does he flounder.
•   Hunting Skills – He is able to hunt and skin helpless animals. This helps him obtain raw meat for his sister’s trade without going through other channels.
•   Sensitive Nature – Somehow, Xander had always been rather sensitive to other peoples' feelings and thoughts. Of course, he cannot see exactly what the other is thinking, but he has an uncanny ability to vaguely sense what the other person would do, or how they're feeling. Not many hidden feelings escape his notice.
•   Social Skills – Away from the battlefield and in a social gathering, Xander is a polite young elf, always knowing what to say, what to do, pretty much charm incarnate. His friendly demeanour and his astonishingly good looks immediately endears him to many people of the opposite gender, and those who are of his same gender often welcomes him with open arms. Until, of course, he hits on their girlfriends.
• Familiar (Lilith) - This beautiful eagle of his helps him hunt and search for food. Plenty of times, she has lead him to a treasure hoard of prey, helping him obtain quality meat.

Weaknesses:

•   Chivalry and Masochism – Yes, he may be a playboy, a flirter, but he is also chivalrous. Nothing pleases him more than to see a lady enjoy time with him. To him, ladies should be treated as ladies, and not smaller, weaker men. He would be the last one to hit a woman, even if she has ill intent, but the first to defend any lady from unwanted attention given by scoundrels. This most probably stems from his sister complex. He constantly tries to be the strong man in any group, the dependable one, the brave chap. This leads to many dangerous times. For example, lets say that a girl was kidnapped by an orc. In an attempt to look like a fearless hero, he would be the first to volunteer to rescue the lass, thus putting himself in danger. In a way, this makes him dangerous to himself as well, for if he were injured, he would brush off the pain as nothing, leaving the wound prone to infection.
•   Fear of snakes - Due to an accident when he was young, Xander has an overwhelming fear of snakes. Grass snakes, brown snakes, any sight of any klind of snake will usually freeze him up. He'll be unable to move, and if the snake gets too near, he'll be likely to freak out. Of course, he doesn't advertise this particular aspect of his personality, as it shows him in an opposite light of what he usually is, but it is there. The image and feel of the snake coiling around his neck usually dissuades him from using ropes as well. For ropes, he does his best to not need them, but if he has to, he'll feel extremly uncomfortable. Should he ever be tied up, he'll black out, as the old trauma would be too much for him.
•   Overprotectiveness – Xander is very protective of his sister. He's always taken care of her, ever since they were kids, and that isn't going to change soon. He would be the first to use violence should anyone hurt her. Considering that she has a knack for trouble, he gets into fights quicker and more often than expected.
•   Low Blood Pressure – Xander has low blood pressure. Basically, he has to endure dizziness and lightheadedness every time he moves from a horizontal position to a vertical position or standing up after sitting down. Often, if he has a short nap in the afternoons, he ends up with a headache. On top of that, chest pains comes easily if he is knocked down hard enough, and it takes some time to recover. The norm would be one to five minutes.
•   Playboy – Bottom line, Xander is a womaniser. He enjoys flirting with any pretty lady he comes across. To him, flirting is an art, something to be perfected over time and experience. Normally, this wouldn't be a problem if he just flirts with whores and serving wenches, but more times than not, he seduces married or attached ladies too. As a result, he often has jealous husbands and furious boyfriends after his hide. This has caused him to be in many bar fights, and unless he curbs his enthusiasm, those fights will certainly not be the last.
• Familiar (Lilith) - Though she may be an asset to him, she is also a liability. Many people are uncomfortable with the prospect of a large flying predator nearby, and as such, the twins have been refused entry to taverns, inns, and even towns. In addition, Lilith, as all animals, can be unpredictable. She may just see a small rodent and take after it. The sudden flight of the eagle and the proceeding chaos will definitely get the elves into trouble with the atuhorities.

Weapons:
 
Xander is skilled with the bow and the long spear. Both were taught by his mother and he is proficient with both. He depends more on his bow, though, as he doesn’t carry a spear around. To keep up his training, he trains with a sharpened stick while out in the wilderness, and sometimes spars with his sister, although she uses her Whirlwind instead of a spear.

Belongings:

He has his clothing, his weapons and some money. Other than that, both he and his sister travel light. However, he does have one item of interest. His belt was given to him by his father when he was a child. It is an important accessory with any of his outfits.


Familiar:

Lilith is a grand Torán Eagle that Xander had saved from certain death. The twins chanced upon her while she was a mere chick. She was squeaking and there were splatters of blood on her wings. Beside her, there were three corpses, all looking like they had been mauled by something big. Compassion gripped both twins, but it was ultimately Xander who took responsibilty for the chick. Xander thinks that the main reason she stays is because he is like a surrogate "parent" to the chick, and it stuck. Or perhaps it was because of the steady food he provided; he doesn't know.

Either way, she does help him hunt, by showing him where prey gathers. On the other hand, she is absolutely useless in a fight, as at even the slightest hint of violence from humans, she flees to the top of the trees, and only resurfaces after the conflict is absolved. Her wings are a deeper brown than most, even bordering on black in dim lighting. Her tail feathers are the colour of copper, with a few gold feathers here and there, indicating that she is fairly young. She is the average size for an eagle, although her wingspan is larger than normal, spanning a size of nearly one and three quarter peds. Often, when she is not hunting, she will soar high above the pair, only coming down if they stop for some reason. Should she need to rest, she will perch on a nearby tree or post.

As to her relationship with Mios, she gives him no heed. The first time they met, she had tried to eat him, but Xander has scolded her when she tried. As the time passed, she learnt that that particular juicy morsel nearby was off limits, and she stopped trying. Now she doesn't actively try to kill him, but she always has this malicious glint in her eye when she looks at Mios. Xander thinks that it's because she had wanted to eat Mios, but was thwarted, but Xanth thinks that she's just waiting for Mios to get killed and feast on his flesh.


Name: Xanth Illiana

Gender: Female

Age: 44 years old (Looks 20 years old, has the training of a 21 year old.)

Race:
Elf

Tribe: Arthyron/Maeverhim (Mother is Arthyron, Father is Maeverhim)

Occupation: Chef

Title: The Demand

Appearance Section:

Height: 2 peds
Weight: 1 pygge
Hair Colour: Nor’sidian
Eye Colour: “Bavera’s Eye”

Physical Appearance:

Xanth looks very much like her brother, with the exception of her hair, which she keeps considerably longer than Xander’s. Eyes the colour of Bavera's, the Sea Goddess gaze out from underneath long, smoky eyelashes, sometimes blue, sometimes green, depending on the illumination. An aquiline nose, courtesy of her father, sits in the centre of the elfess’s fair face. Midnight black locks fall casually into her emerald orbs, complimented by the deep red ribbon that is threaded through her long tresses.

Her mouth is normally curved in a coy smile, grinning at anything that catches her fancy. In contrast, however, it may morph into an equally vicious snarl that often makes its entrance when she is annoyed or angry.

Clothing:

Generally, her outfit is rather revealing, but she often throws a cloak over herself in an attempt to be a tad more modest. A small skirt sits on curvaceous hips, black in shade, as is every article of her normal clothing. Her black top is sleeveless, the texture of the fabric matching her cloth bracers. Her boots are made of soft leather, lighter than most.

Like her sibling, she either borrows or buys formal wear when she truly needs it.

Personality:

A sassy youth, Xanth is nonetheless a friendly and playful elf, wanting to make friends with anyone. She enjoys making people smile, or grin at something she said, though she knows that her sense of humour may be off putting for some people. She enjoys black humour, you see. Many times, she will laugh at something that people thinks as horrible. Of course, this doesn’t really help her status in other people’s eyes.

To her, first impressions are important. The first time she gets to know someone, she mentally judges them, and that’s the foundation of the relationship between her and said person. If the first impression of someone is a negative one, chances are, their road to friendship won’t be all roses and lilies. On the other hand, should she take to someone, they can build a relationship better and quicker.

A natural optimist, Xanth looks on the brighter side of things. It makes her happy and less depressed when she thinks of whatever dire situation she’s in. On the other side of the coin, however, by thinking of the best scenario, she relaxes a bit, and doesn’t work as hard to get out of trouble.

Her darker side, however, is much nastier. Deep down, she’s a cynical little brat, thinking of the worst aspects of people and things. She thinks that no matter what people say, they’re always a little bit racist, sexist, perverted and every other horrendous thing on the planet. Whines and complaints come easily to her when she’s in this mood, irritating her normally tolerant and patient brother. Overreacting and little hissy fits are also the norm when she feels bad. Fortunately, she seldom becomes this alter ego unless she’s really depressed.

Strengths:

•   Cooking – She is skilled in cooking. It is her hobby and profession, and she has won many contests and awards. This is also their main source of income.
•   Herb lore – Due to her continued exposure to different herbs and spices, she has also picked up on a few first aid skills, although she is unable to heal anything more serious than a wound that needs stitching.
•   Weapon Skill (The Whirlwind Sword) – The Whirlwind Sword. She was reluctant to pick it up, but she still did as it was her father's wish.
•   Combat Skill (Agility) - Quick on her feet, her soft steps rarely gives her away. This came as a side product of her Whirlwind training. Should she get into a brawl somewhere, it will be easy for her to give her enemies the slip.
•   Social Skills – Xanth has always been a polite young lady, never rushing headlong into a conversation nor forcing her company on others. She, like her brother, is well mannered and a prime example of what a noblelady should be, barring her commoner's clothing.

Weaknesses:

•   Fear of Water – She has a fear of water due to a near drowning when she was young. Her fear has gone to the point where she flat out refuses to go in a 8 ped radius of large bodies of water, such as lakes or rivers. On the other hand, she is able to master her fear for a brief time, enough to dash across a bridge over shallow water.
•   Frailness – Although Xanth is a skilled fighter, she's frail. She may be tall, but her bones are brittle and she hasn't much in the strength department. She is very easily overpowered and it's possible for a grown man to simply knock her out with his fist. To combat this, she employs the skill of speed, preferring to finish the fight before it has begun. Even so, should she be hit, she will bruise easily and heal slowly.
•   Epilepsy – Xanth is prone to seizures if she is too stressed, too scared, or too sleep deprived. Her seizures can range from minor ones, where she just twitches and is unable to move for a few moments, or it may be more serious, with her body convulsing and hyperventilating.
•   Impulses - Xanth often has weird impulses for absolutely no reason at all. For example, she needs to straighten the table mat to just that, or she needs to light a candle repeatedly. In addition, she has to count in groups of four, and will freak out slightly if she doesn't get sets of four. Unfortunately, these impulses, although few, are nearly mind numbing in their severity. She needs to do whatever she's pressed to do, or she'll be stressed out and vexed. These, more often then not, pops up in the worst times, especially when she's in absolutely no position to satisfy her impulses.
•   Sharp tongue – Her sharp retorts and biting comments often makes people angry at the elf. It’s not that she wants to be kicked out of wherever, but she just can’t help dropping a snide comment at anything absurd. This has got her into trouble plenty of times.

Weapons:

Xanth is skilled in the use of the Whirlwind sword, one of the most expensive swords known on Caelereth. This is the only weapon she wields, indeed, she has absolutely no skill with any other weapon.

The Whirlwind sword is a humongous two-handed greatsword. Its blade is unique; thin and back curving, with the end seperating into two hooks. Her Whirlwind is two and a half peds long, though as light as a feather due to its magical enchantment.

She wields the Whirlwind like a whip-like sword, taking into account its unimaginably light weight. It might not cut through armour, but it has the advantage of range, and also is impossible to block using conventional parries or shields. She whips it towards the eyes, neck, wrists and ankles, which aren't exactly covered in armour.

Belongings:

She has her clothing, her weapons, a cookbook that her father wrote, and her mother's pendant.

Familiar:

Accompanying her is a Quallian Sýs'neán called Mios. Mios is very energetic and hyper, often running ahead of Xanth before rushing back, and ahead again. He is extremely curious about his surroundings, and is particularly fascinated with shiny things. Many a time, he would somehow or other get into trouble because he just cannot stop poking his pointed nose in everything that moves, and even things that don't. He is also a spunky creature, daring to tread where others of his kind would not. Not many things will scare him, and he has been known to hiss at anything that irks him, even things many times larger than himself. Unfortunately, this combination often leads him into dangerous situations. In these cases, Xanth will have to step in and save his furry hide.

He came under Xanth's care in a fashion similar to Lilith's. Mios had nearly been killed by a wandering dog, and Xanth had come to his rescue. She nursed his wounds and care for him. When he was completely well, he had stuck with the twins and especially his saviour. Mainly, she thinks, because she feeds him, and gives him someone to cuddle up to in winter. Frankly, it doesn't matter to her. She enjoys his antics and the amusement he provides, and the small amount of food he needs certainly is worth it.

He has an odd relationship with Xanth. In his furry little brain, she is his one constant food source, and he doesn't stand for anyone touching her, besides Xander. If someone has any physical contact with her, he will do his best to hiss and scare the perpetrator away. To her, though, his actions are just one of the many things that makes him adorable. Mios has a rather strained relationship with Lilith, as stated in her section. She's the one predator he actively avoids, though he is much more relaxed in the presence of the twins. Besides Xanth, she's the only other living being that he has never hissed at. He may be a rodent, but he doesn't have a death wish.

History:

The twins were born to an unlikely couple, an Arthyron and a Maeverhim. Sina, their mother, had tired of the sea, odd for an Arthyron. With her parents' blessing, she had sailed to Southern Sarvonia and travelled around the land, acting as a healer, and sometimes a mercenary. Osath, on the other hand, was unfortunately Earthburned, and forcefully exiled from his home. They met while Sina was engaging some orcs in combat. She, having sustained many injuries by that time, would have died if not for Osath's timely intervention. After he tended to her wounds, they decided to travel together for safety and eventually fell in love. After the twins were born, though, they decided to stop performing dangerous jobs like acting as mercenaries, and adopted more mundane jobs. For Sina, she became a performer, dancing for a living, and as for Osath, he became a renowned cook, whipping up delicious meals at a command – for a price of course. The happy family travelled Sarvonia in a caravan drawn by two horses. This way, at a very young age, the twins had already visited more places that most people ever had their entire lives.

Both twins had a blissful childhood. They played hard, worked hard, and enjoyed every minute of it. As they matured, each gravitated to one parent. Xanth grew closest to her father and slowly learnt the art of cooking from him while her brother was more attracted to the combat skills his mother offered. Despite their different interests, the twins had always been close, and rarely, if ever fought. The mutal affection extended to their parents as well. On numerous occasions, the two and their parents would spend many hours under the stars, pointing out constellations they knew and making up names for those they didn't.

Xander's training with the bow and spear started when he was fairly young, 8 at years of age. His mother had wanted to train him to be able to protect himself and his sister should anything happen to her or their father. Jumping into training head first, Xander eagerly absorbed all the fighting techniques that Sina meticulously taught him, proving himself to be a fast learner in theory and in practice. Initially, she had also tried to teach Xanth the skill of wielding a blade, but she was not as enthusiastic as her brother, nor as responsive. She preferred to stay by her father's side, gathering knowledge of the many herbs and spices that her father used.

Her dislike for weapons were greatly magnified by her life changing experience that occured when she was still new to the training scene. On that day, she decided, for once, to make her mother happy by training hard. After training, her mother was glad with Xanth's apparent newfounded enthusiam. As a treat, she gave permission for the girl to take a refreshing dip in the nearby lake. Now, unbeknownst to either mother or offspring, the lake was very deep. Of course, like any other decieving lake, it started shallow, but abruptly dropped deep after about ten peds from the shore.

The oblivious girl was floating in the lake, enjoying the gentle carass of the waters around her. It cooled her hot skin, restoring part of her stamina. The mini sun tan lasted for a few moments before the elf became tired of merely floating and decided to splash in the lake instead. Dainty feet moved to land on the lake's bed, but it was a second after she tried to stand that the sheer depth of the lake got to her.

Xanth could barely swim, and she was now way out of her league.

Panic started to fog her common sense as she floundered in the deep body of the abruptly chilly lake. The dark botton of the lake seemed to call out to her, to stop moving and just float down. The shore seemed a long ways off, she was getting tired from yelling and thrashing and suddenly, the liquid night looked welcome. And anyways, the big thing that was coming at her was going to eat her, so why not give up? Nothing was worse than something eating her. Except maybe the buring in her chest; that was a close second.

Seconds later, Osath resurfaced, his child in his arms. The elf swam back, holding the girl's head above water. The fragile thing seemed to have fainted from the shock, but she still seemed to be breathing. After the kid woke up, she had frequent nightmares from the feeling of lack of oxygen, and she has never been comfortable around water ever since.

It was in their 15th year when things started to get complicated. One night, a hooded stranger came to their inn. As soon as he had knocked, both Sina and Osath became deathly pale. Osath bade Sina to stay with the twins while he spoke with the mysterious man outside. Young and naïve, Xanth and Xander snuck out from their rooms after they were put to rest, and overheard some of the discussion that took place right outside the inn.

“Realise that they're coming, Osath. You can't stop them. He wants revenge. He'll kill you.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“Take up your sword once more; fight.”

“I have children. A family. Should I die, who would take care of the twins and Sina?”

“No. If we fight, I fight with you, my love. We die together.” Sina's musical voice spoke the words out, steel in her voice. Her steadfast loyalty was evident in the way her hand was twined in Osath's, her eyes rejecting any argument before it left the lips of the two men. A collective sigh escaped from her other companions. She was putting herself in danger, and both knew that they could do naught about it.

“You are always by me, and I thank you.” Osath's white teeth flashed in the night, a grin for his wife plastered over his face. “Who will take care of the children, then? You, Nate?” The hooded man – Nate – nodded slowly. “Least I can do for all the things you helped me for, old friend.”

At this, Xanth clutched at Xander's arm. “Is Mother and Father going to war, Xan?” she whispered worriedly in his ear. The grim look in her twin's identical eyes told her everything she needed to know.

The next morning, her parents took the two pack horses, Kevinn and Brifney, and rode in the direction south from where the inn was. Before they left, they hugged and kissed both their children, and introduced Nate to them, telling them that he would take care of them until they came back. Osath then unbuckled his treasured belt, and handed it to the worried looking Xander. "I'll be back for it."

Years passed, and the twins grew fond of Nate, even going so far as to call him a surrogate father. Their real parents still hadn't caught up with them, despite repeated attempts to contact them by both Nate and the twins. In those lazy years, Xanth continued to have an active interest in the culinary arts, whereas Xander concentrated more on hunting to bring in an income, and to provide his sister with raw meat.

Two years after their parents left, Xander got into an accident. He had been hunting in the forest, and he had crouched down to wait for game. A couple of minutes into his vigil, his head was drooping. In those few moments, a large snake had slithered from above the trees and started to curl itself around him. Xander snapped back to full consciousness, and in panic, started to thrash around. The snake quickly tightened its full body choke on Xander, and he would have entered Queprur's domian, if not for the timely intervention of Nate, who had heard his yells. The young elf was scarred forever by that incident, and he has been scared of snakes ever since.

In their 23rd year, Nate left them in the care of an elderly couple, and disappeared for a few weeks. Neither knew where he went, nor what he did, but when he arrived back, he held in his hands a long item wrapped in brown paper. The twins gathered around him curiously as he unwrapped the object. A leather bound weapon fell out on the table. Carefully, Nate drew it, swishing it in the air skilfully. His brown eyes gazed at Xanth intensely as he said, “I'm going to train you in this. It's called a Whirlwind. It was your parents' wish for you to be trained in at least one weapon.”

Silence reigned in the small kitchen as the death sentence sunk in. What? Tear her away from the stove for... this? Xanth's face contorted into annoyance. Nate saw her irritated expression and smiled. “It's going to be hard, but at least try the basics. It was the first weapon your father picked up. My father was an Eilenachian, far from home, and he taught Osath and I how to use it together. Now, I'm going to teach you as well.

Xanth blinked. She had always thought that her father was a peaceful person, never picking up a weapon unless he needed to. But as always, the loyal daughter surfaced, and she begun her training the very next day.

On their 40th birthday, Nate walked into their shared room, tossing an envelope on the table. His grim face seemed harder than usual as he told them of his plans. “I found your parents. I'm going to go after them. They seem to be somewhere in Nyer. In the package, there's enough money to last you for three months. I'm sure you can earn more if you need it. If there's anything, go back to the couple we stayed with last time. You will NOT follow me.”

Before either sibling could object, he was gone. Xander wanted to go after him, but was stopped by his level headed sister. “Three months. If he's not back by then, we go, 'kay?” Xander reluctantly nodded.

The three months passed, with no sign of either Nate, or their parents. So it came that the twins decided to search for them, and they're still searching since.
« Last Edit: May 11, 2008, 01:55:12 AM by Twén Aråerwén » Logged

Garret Arroway
The Wolfling
Mini-mod
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 1061


Human, Kyranian


« Reply #1 on: February 25, 2008, 01:37:51 AM »

Ok, my comments regard your familiars … Just my opinions ... You have some very interesting familiars and hope works out ...

     A Torán Eagle is a fairly large bird and one concern is that she perches on his shoulder, head, or bow. I would think an eagle is just too large and too heavy to do any of those things. If the weight didn't topple him when she was on his shoulder, sharp talons would more than likely cut through his flesh easily. You would probably need a great deal of padding to accomplish this and even then carrying a bird that large would probably tire him out swiftly.

     My concern about the talons also goes for the creature being perched on his head. Birds rely on their claws to help them keep balanced and it seems like his scalp would be shredded in a matter of moments.

     In reply to the creature sitting on his bow I'd have to remind you about the weight of a creature that large. If the bow is strong enough to hold the creature, you still need to think about the ability to move around like that. I would think that it would set him off balance. Also, in my opinion, a slender piece of wood probably wouldn’t be enough for an eagle to keeps its balance on.

     In defence of your daredevil rodent. Since eagles naturally hunt small game and rodents it doesn't seem likely that she would be friends with a rodent. It is their natural instinct and more than likely won't easily forget. I would understand other circumstance, but it his highly unlikely that any animal that was raised in the wild would befriend their prey. Would probably need to go more in-depth on why the eagle hasn't eaten the rodent yet.
« Last Edit: February 25, 2008, 01:39:40 AM by Garret Arroway » Logged

Before you kill him, think of what you take from him. Remember what it is to be alive.
Quote: Robin Hobb
Mina
Ávash'deláey
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 2099



« Reply #2 on: February 25, 2008, 04:13:15 AM »

I don't think we could put two titles on a single account, so you'd have to decide on a single title, or make a second account. 

Also, do you have permission to play two characters on one account?  I think we don't usually allow it, unless the characters are going to be together all the time. 
Logged

The Illiana Twins
Traveling Kitchen
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 52


« Reply #3 on: February 25, 2008, 05:55:04 PM »

Okie doke! Done the edits, thanks Garret. :)

Mina: I have permission from Kali, on the condition that they're balanced. For the title, I'm gonna leave it for now. Just out of curiosity, if I were to make their title one word each, could it be seperated by a semi colen?
« Last Edit: February 25, 2008, 05:58:42 PM by The Illiana Twins » Logged

Nar'Rak Jalthin
New Santharian

Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 27


Human, Kasumarii/ TTV


« Reply #4 on: February 25, 2008, 07:09:31 PM »

Very nicely done Shocked.

*Has had his CD plastered in a maelstrom of multi-colored texts of commentation.*

I have a question:
   Do special-permission items and abilities need to be placed on a new character once obtained or may it be tacked onto your current character? IE: Moonblade/Mithril usage, Lvl 4+ magic, Artifacts, etc.
Logged
Mina
Ávash'deláey
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 2099



« Reply #5 on: February 26, 2008, 12:27:24 PM »

Quote
Just out of curiosity, if I were to make their title one word each, could it be seperated by a semi colen?
Well, I guess that should be fine. 

Nar'rak, I don't quite understand your question.  Also, I don't think CD threads are the place for asking such questions. 
Logged

The Illiana Twins
Traveling Kitchen
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 52


« Reply #6 on: February 26, 2008, 07:59:06 PM »

Okay. Thanks Mina.

*Bumps*
Logged

Torscha
Wanderer
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 457


Human, Centoraurian


« Reply #7 on: February 26, 2008, 09:07:41 PM »

Wow. Did you draw that picture yourself?

Regarding Xander's "sister complex": I'm not sure this means exactly what you think it means. In some sectors of the internet, "siscon" generally suggests a kind of incestuous lechery, which I'm not sure you meant to incorporate as an association. Might want to consider tweaking that a bit so I don't fall off my chair.
Logged

Azhira Styralias
Shamaness
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 1176


Half-elf, Aellenrhim/ Erpheronian


« Reply #8 on: February 26, 2008, 09:11:22 PM »

I was actually thinking the same thing...I read that and was a bit creeped out, to be honest. I mean, a brother and sister can be close, but the way the CD reads, they are a bit "too" close. Not that there is anything wrong with that...I think... Undecided
Logged

"Be still and I shall calm your mind and mend your broken body."
The Illiana Twins
Traveling Kitchen
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 52


« Reply #9 on: February 26, 2008, 09:18:55 PM »

Ooh, so sorry. I suppose I'll tune it down a little? And I'm looking at sister complex from the anime fangirl point of view, you know, the protective older brother. Well, I'll get to the edits. Thanks you two. :)
Logged

Torscha
Wanderer
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 457


Human, Centoraurian


« Reply #10 on: February 26, 2008, 09:23:26 PM »

No problem. It looks like it'll be an interesting place to end up. Anyway, you didn't answer my question about whether you drew that yourself. It's wonderfully pretty.
Logged

The Illiana Twins
Traveling Kitchen
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 52


« Reply #11 on: February 26, 2008, 09:39:48 PM »

I didn't... Unfortunately. I have no talent in that area. And let me tell you, it was nearly impossible to find a girl and a boy who looked like each other, had black hair, and wasn't kissing/cuddling/romantically gazing at each other.

Well, edits done. I think the only place where it was a bit OTT was the weaknesses part? Anywho, I changed both of them. If there's any more, please tell me. :)
« Last Edit: February 26, 2008, 09:43:33 PM by The Illiana Twins » Logged

Azhira Styralias
Shamaness
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 1176


Half-elf, Aellenrhim/ Erpheronian


« Reply #12 on: March 01, 2008, 06:27:01 AM »

Hello Twins!

A couple of things I saw...

1. I think Xander's S&W are not balanced. I think it is required that he have a physical weakness to compensate for his weapons/combat skills. His social weaknesses are...well, kinda weak. I mean, I can see where they would him into trouble, but being a chivalrous playboy would be kinda fun (at least for me...) and not something that could hinder me. My opinion.  azn

2. Relating to weaknesses - I don't see how being chivalrous is a weakness. I see it as a strength and a part of good social skills. Defending the ladies sounds like a decent quality to have!

3. The terms "hypotension" and "blood pressure" are modern medical terms. There are Santharian equivalent medical terms located here that may be of interest to you. In other words, you may have to tweak those terms into something that sounds more Santharian.
Logged

"Be still and I shall calm your mind and mend your broken body."
The Illiana Twins
Traveling Kitchen
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 52


« Reply #13 on: March 01, 2008, 01:54:23 PM »

Hey Azhira! Thanks for your comments. :)

1. I tweaked that, and added in an old injury.

2. Well, it means that he flat out refuses to be anything less than polite or gentlemanly to a lady. Obviously, should any lady want to steal/rob/slit his throat while he's sleeping, he'll be very reluctant to hurt her, and that would be being taken advantaged of.

3. Uh, is there a Santh equivalant for hypotension and stuff like that? I see the body parts, thank you, but I'm not sure if Santh has words for these, so I can't really say.
Logged

Azhira Styralias
Shamaness
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 1176


Half-elf, Aellenrhim/ Erpheronian


« Reply #14 on: March 02, 2008, 12:14:09 AM »

Well...adding an old injury still doesn't seem fitting. Not every weakness has to be an old injury that flares up every now and then. I was thinking something less cliche such as he is not physically strong (but he is agile), or that he is prone to sickness or that he even has a disease of some sort that causes his hypotension. Perhaps he tires easily or has bad allergies (he can't fight well if he's sneezing like crazy...) or maybe he has a bad knee or wrist that handicaps him somehow.

In other words, for a character like Xander, adding an old ugly injury takes away from his other qualities. It would seem to me that he wouldn't really have gotten such an injury judging from his background. I would imagine he would stay away from gritty fighting and brawling. Maybe he tried to get friendly with another man's woman and the man attacked and injured Xander in jealous retaliation. Maybe Xander was hit with a bottle that gave him a head injury causing blackouts or seizures every now and then. Or had his arm, wrist or fingers broken that inhibits his fighting ability. I can tell you that after a bone is broken, it is never really the same again.
Logged

"Be still and I shall calm your mind and mend your broken body."
Pages: [1] 2 3   Go Up
Print
Jump to:  

Recent Posts
[February 12, 2021, 07:16:33 AM]

[December 13, 2020, 12:16:51 AM]

[December 13, 2020, 12:16:21 AM]

[October 05, 2020, 02:58:40 PM]

[March 19, 2020, 03:47:44 AM]

[July 23, 2019, 07:02:29 PM]

[July 23, 2019, 07:02:23 PM]

[June 19, 2018, 12:49:51 PM]

[April 28, 2018, 03:44:22 AM]

[April 13, 2018, 06:36:29 AM]
Members
Total Members: 2845
Latest: kurush
Stats
Total Posts: 214561
Total Topics: 8051
Online Today: 42
Online Ever: 216
(November 30, 2006, 09:08:03 AM)
Users Online
Users: 0
Guests: 37
Total: 37

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2005, Simple Machines
TinyPortal v0.9.8 © Bloc
Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!
Theme based on Cerberus with Risen adjustments by Bloc and Krelia
Modified By Artimidor for The Santharian Dream
gfx
gfxgfx gfxgfx