Erlmatodelnia Paenzie

Name: Erlmatodelnia Oénthèr Paenzie

Gender: Male

Race: Hobbit

Tribe: Helmondsshire

Age: 31

Occupation: Lazy smartmouth thief

Title: Mr Mischief

Height: He is just under one ped but usually lies about his height anyways, making himself about 1.12536342 peds...the more numbers the better

Weight: He is a little lightweight, weighing in at only about 48 ods.

Eyes and Hair: His eyes are a bright Emerald Green and are often different to forget when they are seen for the first time. His hair is oddly black and loosely curled on top of his head.

Appearence: Standing at just under one ped, he tries to hard to make himself either feeling taller or looking taller. His loosely curled black mop he brushes out making it stand out like an affro to help add to his height the best he can. Dazzling green eyes stand out from his dark locks like a sore thumb but a handsome sore thumb none the less. He has found they really attract the ladies so he is just dandy with them. His voice, poor hobbit, doesn't have the thingy they call a musical voice, even though he tries his best to have one. It just never turns out right, not that he cares any.

His clothes tend to be too big for him for he can never find any hobbit sized clothes, not that he even tries to look for any his size. Any color does well too. He seems to prefer the bright colors over the darker colors but Ryu makes sure that the darker colors are taken care of. Nothing much is on his possession except his clothes and his dirks and dagger.

Personality: For such a miniature figure, his mouth makes up for it all, being the largest part of his body and it is constantly in use. He is, simply put, your normal everyday little chatter box. Constantly running his mouth with little to no thought as to what is coming from it. This is often getting him into trouble but has also saved his little hobbit butt many times. To go with his "Smartmouth", he has very little common sense. If he actually does have any common sense, he never uses it. Countering his low common sense is a high intelligence and he just loves the big words that he knows to get on other's nerves. In his hobbit brain is a vast number of facts, most are just random stupid facts but, that is besides the point he is trying to get across the majority of the time.

This little hobbit, so brave and strong,...he wishes. Next to being obsessive compulsive, he has bacteriophobia (When Ryu reminds him), he is very Very forgetful (Often forgetting about his own fears), he also has an inate fear of even the smallest of heights (except the tavern table). He has a small fiend...and women is it. He loves women in any shape or size and will entertain them with his amazingly off key and non singing voice.

Amongst his favorite past times is visiting every tavern in sight and drinking himself sick at each and every one of them, always saving a little drink fo the trip to each one. Unfortunately for him and others, he has a low tolerance level and is usually drunk halfway through his first flask but waits to break out into song until the first flask is nearly full. The problem with his songs is only one thing. No, it is not the words but the fact that the poor hobbit cannot sing, no matter how hard he would try. No one has ever told him this for many either just ignore him or find him irresistably cute when this happens. Actually, it happens everytime but is is not like he remembers.

He has a quick temper especially when he is drunk, which is always. This mentality has gotten him into a lot of trouble and tossed out of many taverns for good but he just waddled over to the next one, asking for a pint of the strongest stuff they had. Ryu cannot remember a day that his small friend has been completely sober. With all the tavern brawls he has been involved in, you would think him to be a fairly burly little hobbit but unfortunately that is not so, he has very little physical strength and prefers not to use it, thus he remains weak. To make up for this lacking, he is very fast and nearly uncatchable, the only one able to snatch him is Ryu. Ryu usually catches him and lifts him high in the air, striking fear in the hobbits heart.

Of course EVERYONE loves a good practical joke here and there...Er absolutely loves them, pulling them every chance he gets. It has become a little habit of his, tricking Ryu at least five times everyday. This leads him to be a bit annoying most of the time, especially with his mouth running one hundred miles an hour. He is a very impatient little being, cannot seem to sit still for very long for something he wants, money is no exception. His common sense is none existant once money is thrown into the picture. (What common sense he has). He is willing to undertake any quest as long as there is at least a small sum involved as a reward.

Weaknesses:
~ Height - definite problem when things are just too tall for him
~ Quick Temper
~ Smartmouth
~ Alcoholism
~ Lack of physical strength
~ Practical jokes and annoyance
~ Very Impatient
~ No common sense -
~ Greedy - will do just about anything to gain wealth
~ Obsessive compulsive - everything must be in order
~ Bacteriophobia - half remembers
~ Extremely forgetful - short term memory
~ Coward - he will get all pumped up for a fight then turn his heel
~ Fear of heights - being on top of anything that is taller than he is terrifies him
~ Female Fiend - will do anything for a woman

Strengths:
~ Pickpocket
~ Fast and very agile
~ Eavesdropping
~ Extremely intelligent
~ Ryu - always there to save his little butt
~ Excellent marksman
~ Knowledge of Poisons (Toxins) - this he learned over many years of experimentation with himself. (yes using himself as a dummy. Maybe that is why he is a little...nevermind) He uses only a few, and they are in themselves very powerful, for he made them. They have no names for he hasn't gotten around to naming them but they each serve their uses. One is applied on his weapons. This causes the injury that is caused to burn furiously and become inflammed as if it is infected. Another is one that is swallowed and needs a few drops to serve its purpose to kill instantly. That one is rarely used for killing is not in his line of work. It is used for the upmost dire need of self defense. The last one that he carries about constantly is yet another that is swallowed and also only needs a few drops to do its work. It paralyzes the victim for the rest of the day. They will return to normal after a good rest if the dosage is correct.

Weapons:
~ Five poisoned dirks that he keeps hidden on his person at all times. Never parting from them.
~ Numerous poisoned darts
~ A large dagger

Possessions:
~ His weapons
~ Few sets of clothes
~ Flask - always full
~ Food for a few days
~ His utensils for his poisons
~ Large bag of money (mostly gold)

History:
You would think Hobbits would have the common sense to stay safe in their little homes in the Earth...But not Er! Common sense, out of all the knowledge he knows, he has not yet comprehended its meaning, even in the slightest. It was just like any other night, they were all the same to him. Gaily visiting the local tavern for his nightly two and a half flasks, singing, and of course...all the pretty ladies. Marching proudly into the tavern, he called upon the barkeep to bring him his usual then took his place at one of the tables waiting.

"George! My Flask?" Er called out to the barkeep impatiently. Tonight he had been eagerly awaiting his nightly drink and wanted to be on with it.
"A little impatient tonight Er?" George chuckled as he set a large flask in front of the small hobbit. "Drink up little fella!"

Er eyed the flask eagerly and grasped it with two hands, bringing it to his lips swiftly and taking a long hard draught. His mouth spreading into a large grin afterwards as he clammered ontop of the table.

"Alright men! I am feeling quite dandy at this point in time, care to join me in a song?" He hiccoughed painfully, burping loudly enough to cause him to fall flat on his arse.
The place roared with laughter at the small form sitting atop the table with a contorted face. Slowly, he rose to his feet again and waved his hand in the air indicating that he never felt better, "Now! Where was I? Ah yes...a song!" He opened his mouth to begin but was cut short by an older man stepping in front of him.

"None of that singin' in 'ere. Me ears nev' stop a ringin' from thee last time!" The man barked.
Er stepped up to the man and poked him in the chest, looking him straight in the eye for the table allowed him to do so, "I shall sing if I like. If you don't like it...leave!"
"'Ow dare 'ou touch me!" The man roared, grabbing Er by the scruff of the neck, lifting him off the table.
"Um...if you please sir, put me down..." Er replied meekly, eyes darting down to the ground, eyes twitching from the horrific sight.

"As 'ou wish.." The man chuckled, roughly dropping Er to the ground where he hit with a loud thud.
"Aye thankie sir!" He rose to his feet and brushed himself off. "Do you have any special song requests?"
The man turned around, face red as a beet, and reached for Er again but missing by a long shot. Er hand begun to rush towards the door only to be stopped by George the barkeep, "You have to pay for that flask Er. I am not letting you get away this time."

"Awww...Do I have too?" He whined, putting on the cutest face possible. "I left all my money in my room. Perhaps if I ran and got it, hurrying back you would let me go?"
George scratched his chin thoughtfully, "That is a proposition. Unfortunately I don't buy this time Er...you tried that yesterday, the day before that, and three days ago. Need I continue?"
Er crossed his arms across his chest and put on the best bad boy face he could, "What if I come back and pay you double what I owe you?"
"Sorry Er, I know you better than that. You would never part with your gold even if you wanted too. Your greedier than a raven is with shiny things." George chuckled to himself, patting Er on the head before walking back behind the counter.

He tapped his foot impatiently at George's last comment but realized that he was right and shrugged, walking back to his flask only to find it missing.
"Alright! Who stole my drink?" His voice booming as loud as he could possibly get it go. He eyed the occupants of the tavern suspiciously, searching for the culprit. Soon his eyes fell upon the man who had blown up at him earlier. As his gaze paused, the man sent him a stupid grin and Er marched directly over to him.
"Give me back my flask!" he demanded, crossing his arms across his chest.
"Make me!" the man laughed hysterically holding the flask just out of Er's reach. "Come on kid...I will let you have it if you can touch it."

Er growled and just stared at his flask for the longest of time before moving in any way.
"I think that your proposition is a bit on the unfair side my friend...and don't call me kid!" He stood up next to the man, who is almost double his height and rambled off numerous curses as he ponders his situation.
Quickly he made up his mind and was clammering as fast as he could up to the table to face the man only to be held tightly by the back of his shirt.
"And where do you think you are going?" The man asked roughly, holding Er tightly enough to keep him from going anywhere.

Trying all the more harder to get free from the mans hold, he grunted and growled as he tried to force himself toward the bench.
"Let me go!" Er ordered but knew full well that he wouldn't be able to escape on his only brute strength, for he had none. The man just roared and held on all the more tightly, this was just to comical for him to let it pass to quickly.
"What do you want kid? What ever it is, I shall return it to you for a small price of course." Er glared at the man as he turned to face him. Being called kid was enough to make his little hobbit blood boil. He wrentched himself free from the man's grip and stood before him with his arms crossed in anger, tapping his foot impatiently. He wanted his drink back but how he was going to get it was beyond him. Deciding to try a number of things he started out just by asking nicely for it to be returned.
"May I please have my flask back, good sir?"

The man leaned back and just laughed at Er and his pathetic attempts to have his flask returned.
"You shall have to do better than that kid." The man laughed again as Er's face turned bright red again with immense anger at being called kid. Er then decided quickly on what to do and he drew a dirk and sliced the man's ankle. The man roared in pain as the poison that was on the blade sunk into his skin with a sickening burning sensation.
"You little..." The man growled and reached down to grab Er but missing completely as Er jump out of the way and watched the man fall drunkily to the floor. "I will get you for that!"

Stepping up to the man, he nicked the man a couple more times with his dirk, allowing more poison to get into the man's system. The man roared in pain each time the dirk touched his skin. Er knew exactly what the poison was supposed to do and what it was doing to the man. Only weakening his immune system to an pathetic state where just about anything would kill him. That is if a full dose was given but Er was smart enough not to do such a horrible thing, well...at least the first meeting.
"Do I get my flask back now?" He asked politely. The man nodded painfully as the poison was beginning to take effect on his drunk form. Er smiled and clammered onto the table and grabbed his flask, closing one eye and peering into it as if studying its contents.
"Did you drink any of it?" He climbed down and kicked the man in the stomach. The man curled from the pain and shook his head in reply for the wind had been knocked from his lungs at Er's strike. Er nodded in satisfaction and clammered back up to the top of the table and plopped himself down and swallowed the last half in one breathe. When he finally came up for air, he toppled over, filling the room with laughter at his clumsiness.

Slowly, he rose to his feet, after trying to find his balance several moments. After about the fifth attempt to stand, he managed to keep his legs long enough to belch loudly then burst out laughing which was followed by him landing flat on his arse once more. The men just sat and watched, shaking their heads sadly. Never had they seen such a low alcohol tolerance and it was just a sad sight to see. They had no idea with what to do with him and what they should allow him to do. He seemed almost uncontrolable to some extent, though they knew they had him beat physically...maybe.

As the night wore on and he drank more, the men also drank more to keep up with him and to restrain themselves from hurting him in any way. For some of the men, he became quite cute and enjoyable to have around, while others dealt with him for the time being, hoping and praying to themselves that they would never have to live through another night like this one. The men hauled out the man that had given Er a little trouble earlier and they soon encouraged him to sing and they were soon all singing every hobbit drinking song that he could think of in his state (about two). Before they knew it, it was earlier morning and many were beginning to head home for the night. Er had passed out eventually from the lack of oxygen from all the singing he had done and all the drinks he had downed, sleeping peacefully on the tavern table.

"Er..." George shook him gently. "Time to head back to your lodgings."
Er opened one eye and just stared at the man looming over him. Saying nothing, he closed his eye again and resumed his sleeping state, waving a hand in the air to motion to the bar keep to leave him where he was at. George just smiled and picked Er up and carried him outside the tavern and laid him beside the building all curled up and as comfy as a little hobbit can get in a big world. And there he remained till mid-day of the next day, completely sober...well, as sober as he could possibly get, and greeting all the pretty ladies that passed along the street. (Most of the ladies were still fairly pretty at this time for the alcohol had not completely disappated from his system)

Many of the women hurried past him as he approached them, whispering to their companion at their side, but others stopped to give him a short pat on the head. He was content with both for he was sure that the women whispering were telling their friends of their undying affection for him. That thought just put a large silly grin on his face as he strolled through town. The day went as such, pickpocketing a few people for some spare change for the night and waving to all the ladies as he passed by them with the large grin on his face. "Life is good." he thought to himself.

He was just feeling so on top of the world that day that he decided to be reckless and do some sloppy pickpocketing, nearly getting caught on his first couple of victims. When he took a break to count his collectings, he sat in the shadows watching the peopole stroll by without a care in the world and it fascinated him to no end. One, in particular caught his eye. A tall cloaked figure, passed him slowly, almost methodically and it intrigued him completely. Quietly he rose to his feet and followed the figure down the street, mesmorized by everything about the man. Quickly he shook his head and looked to see what size of purse the man was carrying. It was large and seemingly heavy, that only perked Er's ears all the more. The lust in his heart for the yellow shiny pieces was slowly taking over his judgement, clouding it to a room full of the shiny stuff.

He followed the man closely, eyeing the large purse the entire time, dying to have it in his hands. He would give just about anything to have it. At last the opportunity came that he had a clear shot at the purse but for some reason he hesitated for a second and lunged too late. The man had moved and he ran splat into the man's rear end. The man jumped at the sudden contact and Er fell flat on his arse, groaning loudly in pain.
"What the...?" the man bent down to help the poor hobbit to his feet as Er sat rubbing his nose. It took only but a moment to have Er back on his feet again. The man, still at Er's level helped to brush the little one off.
"Now...can you tell me what that was all about?" The man asked softly, looking Er in the eye. Unfortunately, the affects from the night before had not allowed his tongue to tighten and he spewed his plans to the man before him.
"I was after your purse for it was so large and I could see all the pretty gold pieces in my hands as you walked by." Er poured quickly without taking a breath before he spoke. The man nodded as Er rambled but did not take any action as to punish the hobbit.

Once he was finished letting loose his plans, Er realized what he had done and cowered from the man though the man had a firm hold on his wrist still. He looked up at the man, fearing the man's gaze.The man rose to his feet smiling slightly at the amusing sight. Looking down at the poor creature cowering from him, he could not help but chuckle in the least bit. When Er heard the sound of laughter, his gazed flowed upward to look up at the man and was unprepared for what he found. The was looking down at him with the most amused grin on his face and every so often a chuckle would escape his lips. Er gulped a couple of times before trying to speak.
"What are you going to do with me now?"
The man crossed his arms over his chest and just smiled. Er became very paranoid and began to tremble. The man then reached down and patted the hobbit on the shoulder, dropping five gold coins into the small hands.
"For your honesty..." The man ruffled the hobbits hair before turning to leave.

Er just stood there in disbelief, staring at the shiny coins in his hands. How it happened that he got money out of the deal was way beyond him. He started to run after the man for he hadn't even gotten the man's name but it was too late. The man had disappeared in the crowd never to be seen again. Standing in the middle of the road, paying no attention to the town bustling about him. The mysterious stranger intrigued him and he would have to set aside time to search for the man but now...since the sun was beginning to set, it was time for the nightly ritual at a tavern...any tavern. The hardest part was just picking one for the night.

It had been a long day and he needed something...someone to give him some energy, thus deciding on the one that provided the most women, the one in the center of town. He knew it all too well for many of his nights were spent at that particular one. It was his favorite all around. The moment he entered, a loud cheer went up from its occupants for it had been some time since he had last visited. The ladies crowed him and lifted him off the ground. A shrill cry of terror escaped his lips as he looked down to find how far above the ground he was. The ladies quickly set him on one of the tavern tables and placed a full pint of his favorite before him and thoroughly encouraged him to drink to his heart's delight. Once he had finished his first pint, he broke out into one of his favorite drinking songs, entertaining the entire room with his not so beautiful voice.

The men cringed and dealt with it while the women crowed him and encouraged him on. One in particular was really enthusiastic and never left his side once. She just found him too darn cute. Half-way through one of his songs, he saw a familiar sight that he thought he would have never seen again. It was the cloaked man that had given him the five gold pieces. He was astonded that the man was in the same room with him at this very moment. He stopped in mid-verse and just stared dumbfounded at the man that had just walked through the door. The lady at his side stared at him as he gazed in front of him at the mysterious cloaked figure.

Jumping down from the table, he landed hard on his arse and blacked out for a bit. It did not take long for him to come to though as he was fairly deteremined in his present task to find out who this man was. Just as he rose and shook his head, he heard a slap then a blood curtling scream. A drunk had gotten his hands on one of the ladies and tried to make a smart move on her in the middle of the tavern. This did not suit well with the little hobbit. Thus he clammered to the top of the table and took a defiante stance towards the man, puffing out his chest stubbornly.
"Let go and leave her be, good sir." He ordered, not really getting a good look at the man but using all he had to keep his courage up at a decent level.
The man turned suddenly to face the small figure atop the table and just glared at him.
"And who are you to tell me what I can and cannot do?" The man roared.

Er gulped loudly, fidgeting slightly but managing to hold himself steady for the most part. The man dropped the girls arm, who ran from the tavern immediately, and lunged at the hobbit. Er did not move except to the side, allowing the man to pass by him, crashing to the floor. Laughter escaped Er's lips as the man fell. It was just too funny to hold back yet he would pay for such an action. The man lifted a foot and kicked Er off the table, sending him flying to the ground on the other side of the room, landing in a ladies lap. He quickly apologized then hurried toward the man at full speed, tripping the man as he ran in the direction that Er was once located in the ladies lap. The man landed with a thud on his face.
"Why you..." The man roared, fury clearly seen on his features.

"Why me what?" Er teased, just asking for more trouble with every word he says. In the corner, the cloaked man watched with immense amusement at the little hobbit. The one that he had unintentionally run into in the streets earlier that day.
The man on the floor, grabbed one of Er's legs, bring Er to the ground quickly and painfully. The wind had been knocked out of him.
This went on for some time until the man had Er stuck, holding him fast. It was then that the cloaked figure in the corner stepped up.
"I think it would be wise to release my friend, my good sir." His voice rich and commanding, yet soft and reserved in a way. Er's captor glared at the cloaked figure, only tightening his hold on the hobbit, squeezing unnecessarily hard on the on the hobbit, causing him immense pain.

"Must I repeat myself sir? Release the hobbit or I shall have to take action against you." The figure repeated, a hand resting lightly on the hilt of his sword that was neatly sheathed behind him.
"I guess you must, this little one is not getting away with anything!" The drunk spat, loosening his grip on Er slightly, preparing himself for a possible attack by the cloaked figure.
"Is that an invitation?" The cloaked man asked irritatedly. The drunk was getting on his nerves, I mean, how hard could it be to let go of a hobbit and avoid trouble? A gentle shake of his head followed.

Er watched the figure with intense interest. Never had anyone stepped up to save his little butt when he got himself into trouble.
"I appreciate your willingness to help Mr. Cloaked Man..but I am quite capable of taking care of myself." Er nodded defiantely to the figure as he struggled against the drunks hold.
"As you wish..." the figure bowed then returned to his place in the shadows. The then returned to his firm hold on Er.
"He ain't gonna save you now!" the man growled, squeezing Er's neck as hard as he could.
Er stood in the man's grasp gasping for air, the cloaked figure watching with increased amusement as the hobbit struggled.

Finally, Er, kicked the man in the stomach, making him kneel over in pain as the wind was knocked from his lungs.
"See how I feel!" Er gasped as the man released him quickly, grasping his abdomen in the lack of air and immense pain.
With one more last kick to the man's face, Er scampered off out of the tavern, away from the hubub. Little did he know that he had a stalker as he left the building.

The cloaked figure from earlier had silently followed him from the tavern, staying close behind him yet far enough away to remain inconspicuous. Unfortunately for the man the hobbit had an acute sense of hearing and could hear him following.

Er didn’t know what to do besides to try to get lost in the crowd, which, for him, would be easy to do. He tried, time and again to do so but was unsuccessful each time. The man stuck close and amazingly enough, Er couldn’t shake him. Finally, he couldn’t take it anymore and he turned around to face his stalker
“Who are you? And why are you following me?” Er demanded when the man was standing before him, crossing his short arms on his chest in annoyance.
The man chuckled and stared down at the annoyed hobbit with increased amusement.
“Well…if you must know…I am Ryu and I am here to watch you and your behavior then report it to my master who will then determine your fate.” The figure announced suddenly.

The poor drunk hobbit, tired from the day’s events couldn’t help but to believe the man’s every word, mouth ajar in immense shock.
“So you see?” Ryu asked softly, staring down at the poor hobbit that obviously believed his every word.
Er nodded numbly for he was still very drunk and believed every word of Ryu’s.
“My orders are to bring you to my master dead or alive, preferably alive so that he may question you.” Ryu continued to lie, actually enjoying every second of it.
Er nodded in grim realization of the man’s words, taking them in fully and completely understanding them to be true.
“What are you going to have me do?” Er questioned quietly, gulping loudly as he spoke.
“You are coming with me,” Ryu reached down and snatched him up by the scruff of the neck.

Surprised by this action, the hobbit was now terrified…for more than one reason. One, that he might end up losing his life and two, he was deathly afraid of even the smallest heights except the tavern table. Swinging his legs up, wrapping them about the man’s arm and squeezing the man’s wrist with his arms, holding on for dear life.
“Sir, if you don’t mind, I would rather walk…” Er squeaked.
A soft chuckle escaped the man’s lips from Er’s reaction as he carefully set the hobbit on his feet once more. A sigh of relief escaped the little hobbit. Ryu just grinned in sheer amusement.
“Follow me then the master…” Ryu began.

“Erlmatodelnia Paenzie …that is the name.” Declared proudly.
Ryu raised an eyebrow with immense interest.
“Strange long name for a hobbit no doubt…” Ryu remarked.
“I am called Er for short…just Er…nothing else.” Er nodded defiantely.
“All right Master…Er, follow me” Ryu motioned for the hobbit to follow.

Ryu led the small hobbit from town then set up camp just outside of it.
“Tell me a little about yourself Er. About your family…” Ryu asked with a sincere interest in the hobbit.
“Ah! The shire days!” He pulled out a full wineskin, filled with the strongest whiskey
a round, taking a large swig of it before beginning his long story of his homelife.
“Boy…I left the shire about five years ago….well, I was more like kicked out. Wasn’t liked much by the folk there. My Pap, rest his soul, my closest friend, had cast the tie-breaking vote to force me to leave…yes they voted on the matter.” Sadly he shook his head.
Ryu’s face was contorted with confusion but he said nothing, just placed his hands behind his head and waited for Er to continue.

“You see…what I had done to receive such treatment was that I had stolen, successfully stolen mind you, a bag of gold and two dirks from a visitor of the shire. It was a large bag and the dirks were awful nice. We rarely ever had any visitors and I was thoroughly intrigued with him and his belongings, mostly his shiny belongings.”
Yet another mouthful of the whiskey was downed before he continued, emerald hues gazing at the man in front of him knowingly.
“The night I was born, I was told that there was a full moon. While most thought nothing of it at the time, as I grew older I began taking on little quirks that were accentuated by a full moon, my love for shiny things in large quantities for example. I would become itchy all over if I didn’t have something shiny in my hands and often I didn’t own anything shiny thus I had to find something and take it. This grew into a small obsession up till now.”

“Have you been able to control yourself then?” Ryu interrupted.
A soft mischievous grin spread across the hobbit’s features, “No…and stop interrupting, I haven’t finished yet.”
The hobbit scolded and Ryu could only laugh at him.
“Anyways, many believed me to be greedy but I don’t understand what could possibly give them that idea. Just because I love shiny things, especially the gold colored thingies, doesn’t mean I am greedy.”
He shrugged and glanced about the camp hungrily as yet another mouthful of his precious whiskey disappeared into his awaiting mouth.

“You wouldn’t happen to have anything to eat around here would ya?” Er questioned, licking his lips lightly.
Digging into his pack, Ryu produced a small piece of salted meat and handed it to the hungry hobbit, who took it gratefully and began gnawing on it contently.
“What about your parents? What are their names?” Ryu asked after several moments of silence.
Er just sat there chewing on his meat thoughtfully, almost ignoring the question that Ryu had asked.
“My parents eh?” Er suddenly spoke up. “Their names were…” He paused to think, as if he had forgotten their names. “…Rosemary and Frankies. Honorable folk and I shall never forget them as long as I live.”

Er finished his meat and drank the last of his whiskey mournfully, staring at the wineskin for what seemed to be hours. Rising to his feet, he yawned deeply and stretched.
“I ought to be going, I have a long day of work ahead of me. My purse is growing light from trying to please all the ladies in one night.” He announced and began to walk off.
“I am sorry my dear hobbit but have you forgotten? I am to bring you to my master.” Ryu reminded the little one.
Slowly, Er turned to face the man with a smug look on his face, “Don’t lie to me man. I know that you have no master and the story you told me is a lie. If you did have a master and you were supposed to bring me to him, I would have been before him a long time ago and possibly dead.”

Ryu blinked several times at the hobbits reasoning, “When did you figure this all out?”
“Just now…” Er said expressionlessly. “I had no idea that you were lying until just now. You didn’t jump up immediately to try to keep me from leaving.”
Ryu nodded apprehensively thinking deeply about the somewhat confusing words of the hobbit and how he had come up with all that in such a short amount of time. Er couldn’t help but to laugh hysterically at the man’s confused expression, falling to the floor amidst the fit of giggles.

A small chuckle soon escaped the man’s thin lips as he watched the troubled hobbit, “You know boy…perhaps we should stick together. We would keep each other a good company.” Er slurred, walking over to Ryu and stumbling over his feet in the process, landing flatly on his face.
Ryu stopped laughing and stared at the hobbit, “Did you just call me boy?”
“Yessss…” Er nodded still laughing. “I did call you a boy for that is what you are compared to me.”
“Ha! That is a laugh. I bet I am older than you.” Ryu challenged suddenly.
Er just stared at him blankly, “Did you hear none of my story? I am 21 and you couldn’t be more than…say 17 or 18.”
Ryu’s tension fell in realization, the hobbit was older than he was and that was just…unheard of. Someone so much shorter and smaller than he was several years older than he was. That was scary.

Concerned, Er walked over to him and waved his hand in front of Ryu’s face, snapping him from his deep thoughts.
“You there big guy? Or did I lose you to your daydreams?” Er chuckled at the blank expression on Ryu’s features.
Ryu shook his head, staring oddly at the short figure before him that was waving his hand in his face.
“Can I help you?” He asked shortly. “I am here and you did not lose me to no dreams.”
Er sighed disgustedly and staggered off toward town but not getting too far before he fell on his face once more snoring loudly. Ryu just smiled and laid back falling asleep, leaving the hobbit where he lay.

Ten Years Later
“Which tavern are we staying at tonight?” Er asked his traveling companion, taking a deep draught from his wineskin. “I am running low on my…” He paused, raising his wineskin to eyelevel and just staring at it deep in thought. “…My water…”
A deep chuckle escaped the lips of his companion at the drunk hobbit at his side, “Perhaps you should lay off the drink for tonight Er…You have had quite a bit today already.” Ryu announced, shaking his head sadly at his close drunk friend.
“Lay off? LAY OFF? You are telling me to LAY OFF?” Er screamed annoyingly. “I never lay off. Give it too me! I can handle it!”
This was too much for Ryu and he just burst into a hysterical laughter at the hobbit, nearly falling to the ground as he fought for breath. Er just stood with his arms crossed, staring angrily at his friend.

“How far is the tavern again?” Er asked sharply, tapping his foot in annoyance.
“Not more than a mile down the road…” Ryu gasped and pointed.
Er nodded his thanks before marching off, leaving Ryu in the middle of the road.
Starting off at a brisk walk, he began to jog then run toward the town but even then, he was soon over taken with Ryu walking lazily by him, chuckling as he passed the panting hobbit.
“Are you coming or do I have to carry you to have you keep up?” Ryu teased haughtily.
Er growled and painfully picked up his pace to match Ryu’s but even then, soon fell back as he wore out from the unheard of pace for a hobbit.
“Slow down! I can’t keep up when you walk so fast!” Er called as he sat hard in the middle of the road.

Ryu stopped and glanced over his shoulder at the hobbit in the middle of the road, “Need help?”
Er sneered at his companion before he rose to his feet and trotted over to the human, crossing his arms over his chest, looking up at the tall man in disgust, “Is your point in life to make my life miserable?”
“You bet.” Ryu agreed, ruffling the hobbit’s ebony locks lovingly.
Er growled then walked past the man, stomping off once again towards the town, which was now within his line of sight. After a few long minutes, they were within the gates and in search of the tavern. Sticking his nose high in the air, Er sniffed out the distinct smell of strong alcohol, something he could never resist no matter what. At last he caught the familiar scent and took off at a dead run toward the place he often called home, no matter what town it was located in.

“We are almost there, soon we shall be as merry as…” Er paused in mid-stride trying to think of the right word. “We shall just be merry and drunk.”
Ryu laughed, “Whatever you say”
Er lead him confidently to the door of the tavern where there was a lot of yelling and hollering being heard all the way out onto the street.
“Hmm…sounds like a party,” Er exclaimed excitedly and hurried up to the doors and stepped inside, emerald hues glancing about the room for a second before his large mouth opened and he declared his presence. “Er is here! Let the fun and games BEGIN!”
Ryu followed after him closely, shaking his head and keeping an eye out for trouble…as usual.

Edited by: Khiera at: 6/15/05 18:51