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Author Topic: Pai'Orin / Ximax Cat / Phlegah Minder  (Read 4362 times)
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Pai'Orin
Fat Feline
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Cat, Ximaxian


« on: July 14, 2009, 01:12:33 PM »

Name: Pai'Orin

Gender: Female

Age: 6

Race: Cat

Species: Ximax

Occupation: Phlegah Minder

Title: Fat Feline

Overview: Pai'Orin is a Ximax cat who sits around and watches as Phlegah Sphirm goes about her daily life in the catacombs under Ximax. Pai'Orin likes nothing more than to watch Phlegah, to eat and to sleep, not necessarily in this order. Due to a decided lack of activity, not to mention an overabundance of food, Pai'Orin is decidedly fat.

Appearance:
Length: 4 palmspans, 5 nailsbreadths
Height: 2 palmspans
Weight: 2 hebs, 2 ods
Fur Colour: Rose
Eye Colour: Violet

Physical Appearance:
Pai'Orin is a fat cat who spends her days curled up on the mat at the feet or in the lap of Phlegah Sphirm for one of Pai's many daily naps. This violet eyed Ximax cat watches intently for rats, other rodents and even bats which may dare to disturb the tranquility of her cat naps.

When she spots something out of place, or when she wants something to eat, or when she wants to be patted, she opens up her dainty mouth, shows her sharp white teeth and lets out a plainitive 'meow'. As well as being fat, Pai is a long haired cat, with a rose coloured coat from her ears to the tip of her tail. However, because of her weight, Pai is unable to slip through the narrowest crack, or to step on the narrowest rail.

When Pai is sitting up waiting for Phlegah to feed her, one can see she has a noble, almost regal bearing. At a length of four and a half palmspans and a height of two palmspans, she would be a most attractive cat if she was not so fat. When Pai is watching something intently, her long tail moves back and forth slowly, indicating perhaps somewhere deep inside her psyche is the spirit of a huntress.

Clothing:
Pai'Orin has a leather collar around her neck with gem studs inbedded in it. There are five gems in the collar. From left to right, these studs are ruby, emerald, amethyst, emerald and finally ruby. Each one has a diameter of no more than one nailsbreadth. The leather collar has a gold plate across the front of the leather with 'Pai'Orin' engraved on it. It was made by Phlegah and was one of the first pieces made by the young orcish mage after Phlegah received Pai'Orin.

Personality:
Pai'Orin has well and truly grown out of her playful kitten stage. She is now quite content to be lazy and remind Phlegah when she wants something. When Pai'Orin is is hungry, she meows planitatively at Phlegah and sends a picture to Phlegah of some kind of food Pai has eaten in the past. Actually, whenever Pai'Orin wants anything, she uses her limited powers of telepathy to send a picture to the orcess of food. She has found from past experience, Phlegah gives her food when this happens ... Pai is not, after all, a dumb animal.

When a stranger comes, or if Phlegah gets into a confrontation of some kind, Pai'Orin does her best to keep out of sight of the stranger. This is not an easy thing for Pai to do, due to her size and weight. This feline does not like other cats. She doesn't try to fight them, she just keeps away from them. Phlegah does not know why Pai'Orin does this. Not even the production of food will bring Pai out of hiding when other cats are around.

Pai keeps an eye out for mice, rats, bats and other small creatures. When she spots them, she keeps an eye on them to make sure they aren't going to disturb her current activity, whether it is being petted, being fed, napping or meowing at Phlegah. If they do disturb her current activity, she hisses at them, and then meows at Phlegah, remembering to send a picture of food telepathically to the orcess. Despite her appearance, the soul of the huntress doesn't really exist in this chubby cat. Her tail twitching and her steady unblinking gaze on something is simply an indication of a disturbance in the world around her. She'd be much happier to be fed and able to return to her nap.

Pai is amazed at how useful Phlegah's front paws are. She is actually rather amazed at most things the orc mage does with them, whether it is to feed Pai, pat Pai or to give this wonderful sparkly thing to Pai which she wears around her neck. Pai likes Phlegah, not only because the orc gives her food and pats, but also because when it gets really cold, Phlegah is able to warm things up for Pai.

Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths
Phlegah Sphirm: Pai'Orin has been most fortunate to belong to the kind hearted Phlegah Sphirm. Not only did the orc mageling give Pai a beautiful collar to wear with sparkly jewels on it, but she also feeds, pats and cares for the young cat.

Scaredy Cat: Pai'Orin is terrified of being hurt in any way. She'll attempt to hide if Phlegah is confronted by anyone who would do the orc harm. This cat is also distrustful of strangers. This ensures Pai can stay out of harm's way and return to her contented life of eating, dozing and watching Pai.

Limited Telepathy: Due to her intelligence, Pai'Orin is able to communicate telepathically with Phlegah, and only Phlegah. As she can't form words, she uses pictures in her communication with the orc mage. She has found the best response comes when the pictures are of something she'd like to eat.

Weaknesses
Fat Cat: Because Pai'Orin is ... overfed by Phlegah Sphirm, and because Pai'Orin is by nature, lazy, she is rather ... fat. This makes it difficult for Pai'Orin to climb things or to move at a faster pace than a waddle. This also puts paid to any thought she has of being quiet while moving around, as any thing she might attempt to sneak up on would hear her coming and get away easily.

Can't Talk: Being a cat, Pai'Orin can't talk. Instead, she is forced to rely on the interpretations put on her purrs, meows, looks and telepathy by others. Phlegah's general response to the telepathy is to either feed or pat Pai ... either is acceptable to this pampered feline.

Lazy: Pai'Orin is rather lazy. She is used to being pampered by Phlegah and she would rather lie down and nap and then sit up and eat, and then lie down and nap again. Unless she REALLY has to move, because of a stranger coming near her, Pai'Orin will just remain in the same place all the time.

History
Pai'Orin was born the youngest of a litter of seven Ximax kittens to a pair of Ximax cats owned by a husband and wife pairing of wizards at Ximax. When the kittens reached the age of approximately six weeks, the wizards were giving them away to some of their students. Pai'Orin ended up in the possession of Phlegah Sphirm, a young Volkek-Oshra fire mage. As a result of playing with 6 older kittens, Pai'Orin was in good shape at this point in her life.

This was all about to change for Pai, however as the young orc mageling pampered the kitten endlessly. This pampering including almost constant feeding, being patted every few minutes and having her every whim catered for. Pai, being lazy by nature accepted all this in stride over the course of the following five and a half years until she became the large, overweight cat we see today.

Pai'Orin is happy, she is well fed, looked after and patted by Phlegah, who now sees to Pai's every need. After making sure Phlegah was happy and everything was in place, Pai closed her eyes, curled into a ball and purred herself contentedly off to sleep. Watching Phlegah carefully and making sure the orcess is safe is, afterall, a full time job for a cat like Pai'Orin.

Weapons
Pai'Orin has claws on the end of each paw and sharp teeth she could use as weapons if she wanted to, but as she is fed so well by Phlegah, Pai doesn't need to use them. In any case, by the time she waddled over to the rats they would have scurried away due to her size and weight.

Belongings
None

Familiars
Phlegah Sphirm is a Volkek-Oshra fire mage. This tall, hot tempered crafter has been feeding, patting and caring for Pai'Orin for the past 5 years or so. Phlegah lives in the orcish catacombs beneath Ximax with the other Volkek-Oshra, where she is learning to be a crafter as well as be a mage.
« Last Edit: September 11, 2009, 10:18:04 PM by Kalína Mërénwèn » Logged

The fat cat sat on the mat and watched the rat.
Pai'Orin's CD
fionn
Prosaic Waif
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Posts: 321


Mullog


« Reply #1 on: July 14, 2009, 10:57:20 PM »

Hi Pai. :)
I couldn't find much to comment on here, though personally I'd like to see a wee bit more detail in some of the shorter sections, especially the personality. Thhat's mainly just 'cos I really like reading personality sections, though. ;)
a few very minor comments:

Quote
Occupation: Rat Watcher
You don't go into much detail about this in the CD. You do mention that she spends most o her time passively watching the world go by, but some more specific mentions of rats would tie this together a bit more, d'you think?

Quote
Pai'Orin likes nothing more than to watch Phlegah and eat and sleep,
consider adding a pause in here, so it'd be something more like "Pai'Orin likes nothing more than to watch Phlegah, to eat, and to sleep." I dunno if that's just a personal preference, but i found that sentence a little confusing.

Quote
collar around her neck with gems studs inbedded in it.
What kinda gems?

the personality section: as I mentioned above, I'm a sucker for a personality section, and I'd love to read a bit more about what goes on inside this cat's head. You mentioned in the appearance section "perhaps somewhere deep in side her psyche is the spirit of a hunter". Could we maybe hear a little more about that? How does she regard Phlegah; as a source of food and cuddles, or something more? Scared of anything in particular? Does she get along with other cats? Just anything you can think of really, to give a slightly broader picture of what kind of creature Pai is. :)

Quote
Can't Talk: Being a cat, Pai'Orin can't talk. Instead, she is forced to rely on the interpretations that others put on her purrs, meows and looks. When it is Phlegah, the general response is to either feed Pai or pat Pai ... either response is acceptable to this pampered feline.
  Rolling

That's it, really. I can't see anything major - though I've not dealt with familiar CDs before, so I dunno what the specific rules are. But nice work on this - it reminds me a lot of a cat I used to have, so you must be doing something right. grin
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"If it's teeth are longer than your fingers, for the Ancestors' sake, assume it doesn't want it's belly tickled..."
Fionn's CD
Valan Nonesuch
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Human, Erpheronian


« Reply #2 on: July 14, 2009, 11:25:18 PM »

Ximaxian Cats can communicate. I believe they're telepaths.
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Do not act incautiously when confronting little bald wrinkly smiling men!
Valan Nonesuch
fionn
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Posts: 321


Mullog


« Reply #3 on: July 14, 2009, 11:34:13 PM »

It says that that's mainly with their owner, so the weakness probably still stands. could do with a little elaboration - if you want another strength, Pai, you could always stick a bit of that kind of magic on. grin
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"If it's teeth are longer than your fingers, for the Ancestors' sake, assume it doesn't want it's belly tickled..."
Fionn's CD
Pai'Orin
Fat Feline
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Posts: 20


Cat, Ximaxian


« Reply #4 on: August 12, 2009, 03:08:25 PM »

Ok, I've made my changes to this one :D

Fionn and Valan, thanks for your comments, I've done my best to integrate them.

I've changed her occupation as well ... not really sure if this is the best one for it either.

Anyway, I welcome more comments on her.
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The fat cat sat on the mat and watched the rat.
Pai'Orin's CD
Valan Nonesuch
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« Reply #5 on: August 16, 2009, 11:17:48 AM »

A suggestion for your occuptation might be Phleagh Minder? After all, the orc does need someone a bit more level-headed around.
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Valan Nonesuch
Pai'Orin
Fat Feline
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Cat, Ximaxian


« Reply #6 on: August 24, 2009, 12:25:03 PM »

I've integrated the comments of Valan into this now, so more comments are welcomed when you're ready to give them.
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The fat cat sat on the mat and watched the rat.
Pai'Orin's CD
Kalína Dalá'isyrás
Dalá'isyrás
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High Elf, Kaýrrhem


« Reply #7 on: August 26, 2009, 02:49:28 AM »

Ok - my comments may be a bit nitpicky, but I think you understand where I am coming from. ^.~

NOT COMPLETE!!!

I'm making changes in violet, as those are the colours of Pai's eyes



Name: Pai'Orin

Gender: Female

Age: 6

Race: Cat

Species: Ximax

Occupation: Phlegah Minder

Title: Fat Feline

Overview: Pai'Orin is a Ximax cat who sits around and watches as Phlegah Sphirm as the orc mage goes about her daily life in the catacombs under Ximax. Pai'Orin likes nothing more than to watch Phlegah, to eat and to sleep, not necessarily in that order. Due to a decided lack of activity, not to mention an overabundance of food, Pai'Orin is also decidedly fat.

Appearance:
Length: 4 palmspans, 5 nailsbreadths
Height: 2 palmspans
Weight: 2 hebs, 2 ods
Fur Colour: Rose
Eye Colour: Violet

Physical Appearance:
Pai'Orin is a fat cat who spends her days curled up on the mat at the feet or in the lap of Phlegah Sphirm for one of Pai's many daily naps. This violet eyed Ximax cat watches intently for rats, other rodents and even bats that may dare to disturb the tranquility of her cat naps.

When she spots something that is out of place, or when she wants something to eat, or when she wants to be patted, she opens up her dainty mouth, shows her sharp white teeth and lets out a plainitive 'meow'. As well as being fat, Pai is a long haired cat, with a coat that is rose coloured from her ears to the tip of her tail. However, because of her weight, Pai is unable to slip through the narrowest crack, or to step on the narrowest rail.

When Pai is sitting up waiting for Phlegah to feed her, one can see that like other cats she has a noble, almost regal bearing. At a length of four and a half palmspans and a height of two palmspans, she would be a most attractive cat if she was not so fat. When Pai is watching something intently, her long tail moves back and forth slowly, indicating that perhaps somewhere deep in side her psyche is the spirit of a hunter.

Clothing:
Pai'Orin has a leather collar around her neck with gem studs inbedded in it. There are five gems in the collar. From left to right, these studs are ruby, emerald, amethyst, emerald and finally ruby. Each one has a diameter of no more than one nailsbreadth. The leather collar has a gold plate across the front of the leather with 'Pai'Orin' engraved on it. It was made by Phlegah and was one of the first pieces made by the young orcish mage after Phlegah received Pai'Orin.

Personality:
Pai'Orin has well and truly grown out of her playful kitten stage. She is now quite content to be lazy and remind Phlegah when she wants something. When Pai'Orin is is hungry, she meows planitatively at Phlegah and sends a picture to Phlegah of some kind of food that Pai has eaten in the past. Actually, whenever Pai'Orin wants anything, she uses her limited powers of telepathy to send a picture to the orcess of food. She has found from past experience, that Phlegah gives her food when she does that ... Pai is not, after all, a dumb animal.

When a stranger comes, or if Phlegah gets into a confrontation of some kind, Pai'Orin does her best to keep out of sight of the stranger. This is not an easy thing for Pai to do, due to her size and weight. This feline does not like other cats. She doesn't try to fight them or anything like that, she just keeps away form them. Phlegah does not know why Pai'Orin does this. Not even the production of food will bring Pai out of hiding when other cats are around.

Pai keeps an eye out for mice, rats, bats and other small creatures. When she spots them, she keeps an eye on them to make sure they aren't going to disturb her current activity, whether it is being petted, being fed, napping or meowing at Phlegah. If they do disturb her current activity, she hisses at them, and then meows at Phlegah, remembering to send a picture of food telepathically to the orcess.

Pai is amazed at how useful Phlegah's front paws are. She is actually rather amazed at most things that the orc mage does with them, whether it is to feed Pai, pat Pai or to give this wonderful sparkly thing to Pai that she wears around her neck. Pai likes Phlegah, not only because the the orc gives her food and pats, but because on times when it gets really cold, Phlegah is able to warm things up for Pai.


Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths
Phlegah Sphirm: Pai'Orin has been most fortunate to belong to the kind hearted Phlegah Sphirm. Not only did the orc mageling give Pai a beautiful collar to wear with sparkly jewels on it, but she also feeds, pats and cares for the young cat.

Scaredy Cat: Pai'Orin is terrified of being hurt in any way. She'll attempt to hide if Phlegah is confronted by anyone who would do the orc harm. This cat is also distrustful of strangers. This means that Pai is able to stay out of harm's way and return to her contented life of eating, dozing and watching Pai.

Limited Telepathy: Due to her intelligence, Pai'Orin is able to communicate telepathically with Phlegah, and only Phlegah. As she can't form words, she uses pictures in her communication with the orc. She has found that the best response comes when the pictures are of something she'd like to eat.

Weaknesses
Fat Cat: Because Pai'Orin is ... overfed by Phlegah Sphirm, and because Pai'Orin is by nature, lazy, she is rather ... fat. This makes it difficult for Pai'Orin to climb things or to move at a faster pace than a waddle.

Can't Talk: Being a cat, Pai'Orin can't talk. Instead, she is forced to rely on the interpretations that others put on her purrs, meows, looks and telepathy. Phlegah's general response to the telepathy, the general response is to either feed Pai or pat Pai ... either response is acceptable to this pampered feline.

Lazy: Pai'Orin is rather lazy. She is used to being pampered by Phlegah and she would rather lie down and nap and then sit up and eat, and then lie down and nap again. Unless she REALLY has to move, because of a stranger coming near her, Pai'Orin will just remain in the same place all the time.

History
Pai'Orin was born the youngest of a litter of seven Ximax kittens to a pair of Ximax cats that were owned by a husband and wife pairing of wizards at Ximax. When the kittens reached the age of approximately six weeks, the wizards were giving them away to some of their students. Pai'Orin ended up in the possession of Phlegah Sphirm, a young Volkek-Oshra fire mage. As a result of playing with 6 older kittens, Pai'Orin was in good shape at this point in her life.

This was all about to change for Pai, however as the young orc mageling pampered the kitten endlessly. This pampering including almost constant feeding, being patted every few minutes and having her every whim catered for. Pai, being lazy by nature accepted all this in stride over the course of the following five and a half years until she became the large, overweight cat that she is today.

Pai'Orin is happy, she is well fed, looked after and patted by Phlegah, who now sees to Pai's every need. After making sure that Phlegah was happy and that everything was in place, Pai closed her eyes, curled into a ball and purred herself contentedly off to sleep. Watching Phlegah carefully and making sure that the orcess is safe is, afterall, a full time job for a cat like Pai'Orin.

Weapons
Pai'Orin has claws on the end of each paw and sharp teeth that she could use if she wanted to, but as she is fed so well by Phlegah, Pai doesn't need to use them. In any case, she is so large, that by the time she waddled over to the rats they would have scurried away.

Belongings
None

Familiars
Phlegah Sphirm is a Volkek-Oshra fire mage. This tall, hot tempered crafter has been feeding, patting and caring for Pai'Orin for the past 5 years or so. Phlegah lives in the orcish catacombs beneath Ximax with the other Volkek-Oshra, where she is learning to be a crafter as well as be a mage.
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Insanity is only a perception made by those who have yet to attain its greatness. While those of us who have already stepped inside its bounds find bliss in our utter madness.
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Pai'Orin
Fat Feline
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Cat, Ximaxian


« Reply #8 on: September 09, 2009, 01:41:58 PM »

meow?

Any chance I can be looked at sometime soon? The evilness that had invaded my CD has been totally removed.

Pai
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The fat cat sat on the mat and watched the rat.
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Valan Nonesuch
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« Reply #9 on: September 09, 2009, 08:27:43 PM »

Quote
Phlegah's general response to the telepathy is to either feed Pai or pat Pai ... either response is acceptable to this pampered feline.
This seems a little on the awkward side Pai. It might just be the repetition of "response" there.
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Do not act incautiously when confronting little bald wrinkly smiling men!
Valan Nonesuch
Pai'Orin
Fat Feline
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Posts: 20


Cat, Ximaxian


« Reply #10 on: September 09, 2009, 09:02:05 PM »

Thanks for that, Valan.
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The fat cat sat on the mat and watched the rat.
Pai'Orin's CD
Valan Nonesuch
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Human, Erpheronian


« Reply #11 on: September 10, 2009, 11:33:37 AM »

Quote
Fat Cat: Because Pai'Orin is ... overfed by Phlegah Sphirm, and because Pai'Orin is by nature, lazy, she is rather ... fat. This makes it difficult for Pai'Orin to climb things or to move at a faster pace than a waddle.
One more nitpick here Pai, and then I think we can set you on your way to a first approval. It's not an error but you might have over looked something. Does being that... large, make Pai'Orin any less sneaky? The cats I know are all ninjas, so I'm wondering what the consequences might be vis-a-vis the whole "silence" deal.
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Do not act incautiously when confronting little bald wrinkly smiling men!
Valan Nonesuch
Pai'Orin
Fat Feline
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Cat, Ximaxian


« Reply #12 on: September 10, 2009, 12:43:13 PM »

I used to own a cat that you could hear from miles away ... Shara was definitely anything but a ninja.

It was actually the amount of noise she made that first let us know that we had something living under our house.

In any case, I've added in about that for you, Valan.
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The fat cat sat on the mat and watched the rat.
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Valan Nonesuch
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« Reply #13 on: September 10, 2009, 08:21:59 PM »

Alright!
First Approval!
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Do not act incautiously when confronting little bald wrinkly smiling men!
Valan Nonesuch
Pai'Orin
Fat Feline
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Posts: 20


Cat, Ximaxian


« Reply #14 on: September 10, 2009, 08:51:26 PM »

Thanks Valan,

Soon, I'll be able to make sure that Phlegah is being watched.
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The fat cat sat on the mat and watched the rat.
Pai'Orin's CD
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