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- THE CD FORUM POSTICON SYSTEM -

Below is a summary on the posticons used for the character description approval process. The posticon of the first post should always be edited according to the current state of completion of the character description (either by the player, a Moderator or an Administrator).
1) PLAYER - CD is incomplete. Use this posticon if you have not finished your CD.  4) MODERATOR - CD has been approved by one moderator. A second mod's approval is needed.
 2) PLAYER - CD is completed. Use this if you have finished working on your CD.  5) MODERATOR - CD has been approved by two moderators. An Administrator should soon take care of the titling.
 3) MODERATOR - An expert's opinion is needed. The specific field in which the expert's help is needed should be added to the title.  6) ADMINISTRATOR - An administrator has titled the character, and the thread will soon be moved to the CD Archives.
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Author Topic: Gilith/ Gondolwenmith/ Mercenary/ Ranger  (Read 22300 times)
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Gilith
Wandering Woodsmen
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Human, Gondolwenmith


« Reply #15 on: December 18, 2011, 05:30:33 AM »

Woops how did I miss that.

Thank you.
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Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
Gilith
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« Reply #16 on: December 19, 2011, 08:38:57 AM »

This post is simply to help get my CD back on the list. So that it may hopefuly be commented on fixed then hopefully approved
« Last Edit: December 19, 2011, 08:39:53 AM by Gilith » Logged

Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
Alýr (Rayne)
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« Reply #17 on: December 19, 2011, 09:20:43 AM »

Sorry for the delay, Gilith!

There are still a number of spelling mistakes in this CD! Please go through it and give it a once-over. See the paragraph below. I have marked the misspelled words--though there are also a number of grammatical mistakes that I can't marked. Please read it through!

Gilith as was said before is easy going he doesn't let allot get to him but that doesn't mean he can't get exited or mad it just takes a little to get him going. But if he does get mad for example that settles things he will stay that way until something is done.
While even though he is always calm whenever he is not mad or extremely happy he is always slightly happy though he looks very stoic. He is not as emotionless as one might think. He is not extremely loyal yet he sees no reason to go back on his word a lot. He would loose business was he reasoning. He is also not unkind so he might see someone in need and help them for free but if he thinks they owe him money or they offer it he will take it.
                                   
Also, make sure your quotes are in quotation marks, and please change paragraphs whenever there is a new speaker. As it is now, I can't tell who's saying what! Also, keep in mind that Gilith's tribe is Nybelmarian, so he is on the continent of Nybelmar. Many of our stories take place on the continent of Sarvonia, so you may need to find a way to sail across the ocean to get there.

I'm also not sure about a war... but let me brainstorm and see if we can find a solution for that...
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Gilith
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« Reply #18 on: December 19, 2011, 09:29:40 AM »

Thank you I will try to make those corrections right away.
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Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
Gilith
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« Reply #19 on: December 23, 2011, 11:18:27 AM »

I did a little research and changed my history completly I beleive this makes a lot more sense as well as solving a few other problems.
Logged

Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
Kalína Dalá'isyrás
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« Reply #20 on: December 23, 2011, 11:32:35 AM »

I will have a look once I get home from work. :)
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Insanity is only a perception made by those who have yet to attain its greatness. While those of us who have already stepped inside its bounds find bliss in our utter madness.
Nai'r en'Lina ar'Kaimel
Gilith
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« Reply #21 on: December 23, 2011, 12:09:40 PM »

Thanks that would be awesome.
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Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
Juliette Dante
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Human, Centoraurian


« Reply #22 on: December 24, 2011, 12:42:42 AM »

Just a little tip for the use of commas. Try saying the sentence out loud and if it doesn't sound right, then it usually isn't. Anytime you feel that there should be a slight pause in the sentence then insert a comma and it's usually right. It just flows better and makes it easier to comprehend.

Gilith, as was said before, is easy going he and doesn't let a lot get to him but that doesn't mean he can't get exited or mad, it just takes a little to get him going.

Just some useful information.  :) Good luck!
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Beyond this place there be monsters...
Gilith
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« Reply #23 on: December 24, 2011, 01:05:05 AM »

Thanks I'll do that.
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Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
Kalína Dalá'isyrás
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« Reply #24 on: December 24, 2011, 04:10:18 AM »

Hey dear,

Sorry this is a little later than expected. I got off too late to really be able to focus on anything.

One thing I would suggest off the bat is a spellcheck. This is basic for everyone, as we don't always catch everything. Thankfully, we have a spellchecker built in, so just click on it and it will do the work for you. :) If you aren't sure about Santharian spellings, definitely look them up or ask. :)

Weight: 2 pygge  exactly

Quote
Woodcraft: Gilith learning the ways of the woods since he was young developed a few skills. Such as survival in the forest he does this quite well he can supply himself food and shelter if ever the need arise. He can track slink and hide quit well in the woods to having to do so many times before when hunting

This really isn't "woodcraft", at least as I thought it would be. This is more like Survival Skills. I was under the impression he was a carpenter with the title.

Quote
Bows: Gilith can use bows not masterfully but pretty good better than his dagger but worse than his sword.


You mention he is a ranger, and that usually means a good skill with a bow. I would explain this more as it isn't his weapon of choice and just be a straight mercenary rather than a ranger as well. Also, a little bit more detail on his skill would be appreciated.

Quote
Sailing: Gilith having spent a lot of time on many ships learned the basics of sailing.

You mention he is a woodsman, and it sounds like he has spent most of his time inland, so the knowledge of sailing seems a bit odd to me and a bit over the top. If you can provide a good description on how this really applies to him, then perhaps you can keep it, but at this point I would ditch it.


Quote
Calmness: Giliths calmness is nice to him but it sometimes doesn't let him see the big picture of things though he doesn't really care. In fact he has never had to care he has just listened to the strategist on what to do in battle and if he had no strategist he simply fought to live or aid others
.

I wouldn't exactly call this "calmness".

Quote
Speech: while he was not born with a speech problem he doesn't talk very much so he tends to not know what to say or if he does he will probably mispronounce a word or something like that.

Perhaps "quiet" instead of "Speech", as it seems to imply something else. 



I will have a look at the history later, but I think that will give you something to work on for the time being. heart



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Insanity is only a perception made by those who have yet to attain its greatness. While those of us who have already stepped inside its bounds find bliss in our utter madness.
Nai'r en'Lina ar'Kaimel
Gilith
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Human, Gondolwenmith


« Reply #25 on: December 24, 2011, 08:36:38 AM »

Thank you Kalina. I will try to do all of these things. But as for Giliths archery skills I do not believe that Aragorn used a bow at all. Just Andural. But if Rangers in santharia use bows so masterfully I will change that so that Gilith may stay a ranger. Thumb up
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Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
Gilith
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Human, Gondolwenmith


« Reply #26 on: December 27, 2011, 08:40:35 AM »

I have finished my history and hope that it is acceptable.
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Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
Gilith
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Human, Gondolwenmith


« Reply #27 on: January 07, 2012, 09:23:47 AM »

I hope that Giliths history is acceptable.
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Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
Alýr (Rayne)
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« Reply #28 on: January 07, 2012, 01:30:31 PM »

Oh, Gilith, you have been so patient! Sorry no one came by to comment earlier, but your status seems to be "Work in Progress", not "Ready for Comments"!

My comments are these:

I find it hard to believe that he goes straight into being a mercenary. Can we say that he joins the Gondolwenmith military? I don't believe a military is mentioned, but I do know that the Chyrakisth orcs tend to go on raids through the continent, so perhaps you begin out as a soldier protecting caravans from these marauders?

Perhaps we might say that when some of the raiding (which, it should be noted, probably happens primarily at night/dusk) lulls, the military life gets a bit dull and you become a sword-for-hire (or bow-for-hire). Maybe all your troop decides to go this route, which would keep you all together.

I'm not sure about the Scepteres of Tarshiin attacking the Gondolwenmith at this point in history. Yes, there have been a number of wars--and dreadful rivalries--but they two trade at this point. I might recommend toning it down and opting for pirates instead, which is much more likely. I don't know how far the influence of the Crimson Blades pirates extends, but they might be an option. They're not likely to have ballistas, though.

Sailing to Sarvonia looks good to me--but keep in mind that the Tandalas are ON Sarvonia. You're there when you land. Sarvonia refers to the entire continent. Perhaps you meant Santharia? Santharia is the kingdom that occupied the southern half of Sarvonia.

I can't quite figure out why your character is averse to magic. He has a mage friend and there's nothing in his past that would seem to bias him against magic. Besides, the Gondolwenmith actually have "a proclivity for the arcane arts," as they are descendants from the Krean Empire, known for its extraordinary mages.

Last, but not least (in fact, most important), you need to give this CD a good proofing! I will let a lot of things go, but it's imperative that you communicate very clearly--after all, it's a play-by-post! Please make sure your spelling, grammar, etc. is close to perfect. Especially look at "quit", "quite", and "quiet", as these are often confused in this CD!

That's all from me for now. I won't change the icon on your CD, in case you want some time to integrate the changes.  :)
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Gilith
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« Reply #29 on: January 09, 2012, 01:32:00 AM »

*slaps face* How did I miss that. Well thank you for the advice I will definently put that in. I will also change that icon.
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Aye, I've my fair share of scars. Perhaps a bit too many to be honest, decent sign of a careless man. But those don't bother me, they heal, and even if they don't heal right I've always found a way to deal with 'em. The ones I can see at least, the others...the ones inside. They aren't so easy to forget about, they don't heal like the others do. They might heal in a day, a week, a year. Or maybe some like mine, won't ever heal at all. There's no getting past these scars, you can't treat it, you can't cover it up, and you can't find a way around it. But, there comes a day, when you learn to live it, and you stop living in the past, so you can do what your able for the future.

Gilith
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