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Author Topic: Hmmbe Uhm, Mullog, Wily Wayfarer  (Read 7212 times)
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Hmmbe Uhm
Wily Wayfarer (Mullog)
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« Reply #15 on: July 16, 2006, 06:09:23 AM »

I added it.  As I believe I said before, I had planned the journey to Nyermersys to be EXTREMELY uneventful so nothing interesting really happens in the paragraph.  

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Vesk Lyricahl
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Human, Eyelian


« Reply #16 on: July 16, 2006, 03:55:23 PM »

Hmmbe, in my opinion, your description of the journey between the Thaelon and Nyermersys is not sufficient. It is not enough to simply say that Hmmbe was kept within the sack the entire journey, for it is surely not true. During the day, yes I imagine a man could carry a mullog for hours at a time, especially one as small as Hmmbe, but you have to consider the entire journey, not just the daylight hours. What about at night? How was Hmmbe restrained whilst the man slept? What care did the man provide for him? While he wouldn't have worried overmuch about Hmmbe's health, the minimum of care would have been provided, if only to keep the mullog alive. The mullog could survive without food for those few days, but not water. Hopefully, what I just said makes sense.|I

Talia will have to check the distances of Hmmbe's wandering from the Silvermarshes, as distances are not one of my strengths.

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Hmmbe Uhm
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« Reply #17 on: August 15, 2006, 12:54:23 AM »

I believe that I have covered all of the remaining things that were asked for.  The added passage can be found in red.

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Vesk Lyricahl
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« Reply #18 on: August 16, 2006, 03:00:23 AM »

Yep, I'm satisfied. Consider the first approval given.;)  

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Hmmbe Uhm
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« Reply #19 on: August 16, 2006, 04:57:23 AM »

Thanks Vesk.

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Hmmbe Uhm
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« Reply #20 on: August 25, 2006, 03:38:23 AM »

Thanks Kalina.

I patiently wait your approval(hopefully)

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Hmmbe Uhm
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« Reply #21 on: September 05, 2006, 10:50:23 AM »

Its no problem.

Yeah! Titlement!

Testing...1...2...3

Changing text.

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