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Author Topic: Sorossa Ro / Erpheronian / Spy  (Read 7848 times)
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Sorossa Ro
Spy Lady
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« on: May 10, 2012, 07:20:46 PM »

Name: Sorossa Ro
Gender: Female
Age: 21
Race: Human
Tribe: Erpheronian
Occupation: Spy
Title: Spy Lady
Height: 1 Ped, 2 Fores, 1 Palmspan, 3 Nailsbreadths, 2 Grains
Weight: 1 Pygge, 1 Heb, 4 Ods

Appearance.

Sorossa is a tall and slim woman, usually regarded very beautiful. Her build is quite athletic and her curves attractive at the same time. She has shoulder-long light brown hair and deep-set blue eyes. Her skin is tanned, her nose straight-edged.  She has full lips.

She has a great variety of clothing for different occasions but mostly, she wears a long grey hooded cloak with close-bodied long-sleeved red blouse, black leather vest and black wool pants underneath. Her boots are light, with soft soles. When the weather is warmer, she wears sandals.

She usually wears a variety of jewels. However, when she's on a stealth mission, it becomes a priority not to be seen. Therefore she hides the jewels under her hood and clothes when needed.

Personality.

Sorossa is a loner and generally doesn't like to talk to other people. She is virtually emotionless and rather cynical but she often pretends to be emotional in order to obtain information. In her view of life, there is a certain dilemma: she cares about tradition, loyalty, honour and order but at the same time, she believes that the world is manipulated by hidden superpowers (see Weaknesses) which aren't legitimate. However, the solution is simple - there are some leaders who are untouched by the omnipresent manipulation.
Generally, she chooses to serve them as she highly values hierarchy and authority. Life, freedom and dignity of other people (but also of herself!) aren't important topics for her. If she sees it as a part of her quest, she doesn't hesitate to torture or kill. She never betrays those who trust her. Often, she uses both the written and unwritten law to promote herself but she rarely crosses the law or collaborates with those who cross it.

Strengths.

Stealth: Sorossa is, to a great extent, able to move unseen and unheard. This is her key skill which practically defines her trade most of the time. It also gives her the opportunity to attack someone from behind and, for example, strangle them.

Beauty: She is mostly perceived as beautiful and attractive. It makes it easier for her to obtain information she needs. Of course, it always depends on who is the person she's talking to as she definitely doesn't fit the beauty standards of all tribes, let alone races.

Diplomacy: In this context, diplomacy is mainly the art of ingratiating into someone's favour or, at least, not offending them. Afrehanni is a master of compliments.

Interrogation: Apart from smiling and flattering, there is another level of obtaining information: the means of terror, both psychical and physical. Afrehanni knows how to make someone scared, how to act when a captive refuses to talk and if there's need, she also opens her reticule with various needles, scissors and pen-knives.

Hand-to-hand combat excellency: She is very good at hand-to-hand combat to such extent that she is able to kill her foe without a weapon (in fact, much more likely than with a weapon). She's usually dominant when fighting a single unarmed foe as well as a group of unarmed foes. When fighting an average armed foe, she is likely to defeat them. When facing a group of armed foes, however, she is more likely to lose or, more probably, surrender.

Reading and writing: Ability to read information and write notes is also crucial for her trade.

Weaknesses.

Paranoia: Sorossa is convinced that almost everything that happens has been planned by hidden superpowers. The rulers of the world have in fact no power and they just, both directly and indirectly, follow instructions of these superpowers. However, Sorossa doesn't claim to know who these superpowers are and hopes to find and unfold them which is also one of main reasons why she chose to be a spy. This deep belief deranges the way Sorossa perceives reality around her - often she tends to explain any unpleasant thing as a result of 'them' trying to stop her. Often, she is certain that they are after her while there is in fact nothing happening. Also, Sorossa often refuses to work for people who according to her are controlled by 'them' or even belong to 'them'. No need to stress that there is no logical reasoning behind this.

She also suffers of persecutory delusions - she often believes to be followed, harassed, cheated, poisoned or conspired against. She refuses to forgive insults and injuries. Often, she misconstructs neutral or friendly actions of others as hostile and contemptuous. This can, among other complications, lead to great misunderstandings with those around her.

Insomnia: She has big problems with falling asleep. Sometimes, she doesn't sleep three nights in a row or even more. It affects her abilities and skills as well as her mood.

Compulsive spending: Sorossa can't help buying things all the time. Generally she spends money for clothes, shoes and jewelry but also other things when it comes to it as her real passion aren't the things she buys but the act of buying them itself.

Bigot: Sorossa is strongly partial to her race and personal beliefs. At the same time, she is intolerant of those who differ which can sometimes lead to a conflict.

Gluttonous: An odd think for a woman Sorossa appears to be, she is given to excess of food. It is one of her few passions. When eating, she seems piggish and insatiable. However, it doesn't affect her figure for some reason.

Sadomasochist: She derives sexual gratification only from inflicting pain on others or from being physically abused herself. This tendency, of course, isn't something she would talk about and sometimes, it may lead to a difficult situation. Sometimes, when she uses torture for 'practical' reasons, it can be actually motivated by this deviation she posseses.

Overconfident: Sorossa believes that she is the best. This is partly a result of her paranoia: she is the only one who really sees how manipulated the world is. Partly, it is a result of her training: being trained as a spy by the Kasumarii made her think that she is more than special. However skilled she really is, she clearly overestimates herself. Moreover, this makes her rather arrogant.


History.

Sorossa was born in the city of Voldar to family of a wealthy Erpheronian merchant Ephem Ro and his wife Lýnn.

Being an only child of her parents, Sorossa was pampared and educated as an average woman of a middle class family, taught to read and write and to behave properly. However, she always wanted to fight for what she perceived as important. She knew it wasn't really appropriate for her to become a typical warrior or soldier so she was looking for another way to help her people and those above her somehow. Eventually, she found it.

It all happened by chance. She was 17 years old when she overheard a dialogue lead by two two men on a street. She didn't really made sense of the dialogue completely as they used a lot of cryptic expressions. She however figured out that it was a dialogue of a great importance and that she should do something. Excited, she decided to follow one of the men. When she lost him from her sight after a couple of streets, she went home but tried to decipher the dialogue she heard. With no result, though.

A few days later, she was approached by a strange man who was actually one of the Kasumarii sent to Sarvonia to look for young people who could make good assassins or spies. He told Sorossa she impressed him as she was able to follow a Kasumarii assassin who didn't notice for a quite a long time it without actually having any training. Of course, when the assassin noticed, it wasn't difficult at all to shake Sorossa off. Afterwards, he informed the strange man who happened to be a recruiter for the Kasumarii what happened. And it was easy for them to trace her up.

"There are two kinds of fighting", the recruiter said, "the visible one and the invisible one. The visible one is reserved for strong men who are brave, and stupid, hahaha, enough to go for it and spill each other's blood and so on. You know the stories. These men are supposed to be heroes, hahaha. And then, you see, there is invisible war. There are no glorious stories about those who sneak behind enemy lines and gather information. Women, you see, are invisible in principle. Therefore they make good spies. Hahaha."

However, the training in Cyhalloi together with travelling there and back to Santharia was clearly too costly for Sorossa to afford it. The Kasumarii recruiter anticipated it, though. He had already made arrangement with a wealthy baron who, in return, wanted Sorossa to work for him as a spy. Therefore, Sorossa was able to spend three years on the island of Guldor being trained by the Kasumarii, concretely by the Korenjaans, as a part of the famous exchange system and belonged among the best students there. Her parents were informed that she was chosen to study on a prestigious educational institution and it was good enough for them as this very idea made them happy for their daughter.

She returned to Sarvonia where she, as arranged, worked for the baron. She regarded her work as something elegant and honourable, however dirty it might seem to others. For her, there have been two basic types of espionage and she has liked both of them. The first one is the way of shadows and sneaking, the second one is the way of a lady who disguised as an exquisite courtesan or a noblewoman listens behind the door or steals the secret documents. When working for the baron, Sorossa did more of the latter.

Everything would go well if she didn't start to suspect the baron of 'being controlled', eventually she became convinced that his decisions weren't his own and that he even trying to destroy her for discovering it. She panicked. Of course, she didn't want to murder the baron but in the end, she almost did it and believed it was clear self-defence: when he and Sorossa had a secret meeting in the woods once again, his sword oddly fell off the scabbard. Sorossa immediately interpreted it like that the baron wanted to slay her. She attacked him and injured him severely, though keeping him alive. He didn't know her real name and nobody except him (and the Kasumarii recruiter) actually knew that she worked for him. Therefore, she left. No need to say that it strengthened her paranoid disorder and that she has often thought that she should have killed him.

However she has worked for various employers then, she always chose carefully for whom to work. She never worked for anyone whom she considered 'controlled', though it often meant refusing otherwise attractive offers.

Soon, Sorossa was regarded an excellent spy. She decided to work as a mercenary, though a rather untypical one. She was never hired for fighting or killing people ("I'm no assasin", is one of her favourite lines) but for gathering information and for preparing space for those who indeed fight and kill. This, of course, doesn't mean that Sorossa doesn't kill when it is 'appropriate'.

The parents weren't extremely opposed to their daughter's decision to work as a spy, though they didn't really like it and it caused sort of a disagreement between them and Sorossa. In the end, she left Voldar: not because she didn't want to stay with her parents but because it was almost necessary for her to get new jobs as well as to leave the place where she could be spotted by baron's henchmen. She has always exchanged letters with her parents (always assuring that nobody could trace her up, though) and discussed with them her decision. She has respected them too much to just leave them, though she regarded her job extremely important which is, after all, another sign of her paranoid disorder.

Weapons.

a knife - a simple hunting knife which Sorossa doesn't use for combat but mainly for slitting throats of people without them knowing that they are attacked.

Possessions.

a backpack
various sets of clothing and shoes
torturing instruments reticule
belt-pouch with money
empty scrolls and writing equipment
various jewels
« Last Edit: May 17, 2012, 11:29:56 PM by Alýr (Rayne) » Logged

Sorossa Ro
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« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2012, 06:17:29 AM »

I think I'm finished. Looking forward to opinions and critique, if needed.
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Alýr (Rayne)
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« Reply #2 on: May 12, 2012, 01:22:41 AM »

Hi Afrehanni! A beautiful, deadly spy--very cool! It looks like you've been true to the Remusian nature with regard to their pride, stubbornness, reticence and ferocity. There are a few places where you diverge a bit from Remusian nature, though--and while it's all right to diverge a little bit, I think your CD may deviate a little too far. Some examples:

Your character is noted as being very beautiful, and yet her hair is relatively short (coming only to the shoulder). In Remusian society, women where their hair long:
Quote
Among women, long hair is the desired style, the longer the hair the more attractive the woman becomes.

Your character also lacks one of the definitive marks of an adult Remusian woman: facial tattoos! Lower-class women generally have more than higher class women, but it's practiced widely in Remusian society. They're also considered to make a woman more beautiful:
Quote
Tattooing is practiced among the Remusian women... These tattoos are given around age 15, as a sign of maturity and are considered beauty marks by the Remusians.

Your character also has a lot of "but"s or exceptions to the 'rule's. Having a few of these is all right, depending on what they are, but it's important to not have too many or your character begins to lack what I call Santhisimilitude (Santharian version of verisimilitude):

1) Your character wears a lot of jewels, but they don't attract attention.
2) Your character eats a lot, but stays slim
3) Your character is a Remusian woman, and yet she's a fighter.

The last of these is pretty big, because it really goes against who the tribe is, essentially.

I'm also a little concerned at the creation of a secret branch of the Remusian military that launches espial-related campaigns. From what I understand of Remusian culture, I would think spying would generally be regarded as deceitful and dishonorable. However, I will let Altario weigh in on this issue, being the creator of the tribe.

You may have to make a number of changes to your character to may her fit into the Remusian tribe. I might recommend changing her tribe to, say, a Kasumarii. This is basically a tribe of spies, and many of the issues that have arisen thus far would be obviated by a change of tribe.

Let me know what about your character you really have your heart set on--this may come to the decision of whether you want to be a Remusian or whether you want to be a spy. Changes will likely need to be made to history and such either way. Regardless, I will help as much as I can. :)

Good luck!
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Sorossa Ro
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« Reply #3 on: May 12, 2012, 01:36:04 AM »

Hello. First of all, thanks a lot for your detailed comment.

Well, the core I don't want to change is this: an attractive woman who is a spy, together with her psychical characteristics.
Other than that: I can imagine that she won't be Remusian. But then, I suppose I'd have to change her name, wouldn't I? But this wouldn't matter either. As for this, I'll read about the Kasumarii. Is it likely for a Kasumarii spy to join Remusian army? You know, the intention of Afrehanni is to take part in the Santharian War to come.  :) And isn't Kasumarii society too patriarchal? Actually, I thought that being a Remusian woman from a bigger city means I could have a little bit more freedom than in a really traditional society. But, as I said, I'll gladly change my tribe. Definitely so, if it's against nature of Remusians to be spies.

As for the gluttony, I can change it into bulimia. This would explain Afrehanni remaining slim, keep the nature of the weakness and even make it a bigger weakness, I suppose. What do you think?

I can imagine erasing the jewels, too. Or, better to say, imagine Afrehanni not wearing any jewels when on a stealth mission.

Thanks again for your help!
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Alýr (Rayne)
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« Reply #4 on: May 12, 2012, 04:04:08 AM »

Hm. If you want to keep the light-brown hair and the tanned skin, then perhaps the Kasumarii tribe isn't for you. You may need to move your character down to Santharia, perhaps as a Centoraurian, Helcrani, or Erpheronian. There may be room for spying, as I'm sure there are a number of dukes and nobles who would like to have spies collecting research on their political adversaries (particularly in Vardynn). Your renown in that field might translate to the War.

As a note: Kasumarii society, as far as I know, is not patriarchal, so no worries there if you want to change some of your physical features to be a Kasumarii. :)

Remusian society is slowly breaking out of the traditional, but not to the degree that women have so many rights as to be allowed to fight in wars or even (I would assume) own their own property and run a business and whatnot. Though Altario would be able to offer more insight than I would; he's the expert.

As for the gluttony and the jewels: don't worry too much about them! As I said, a few exceptions are fine--we just want to make sure there are not too many and they aren't too drastic.

Please let me know if there's anything more I can help with, or if you're having any troubles. :)
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Leif Terskun
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« Reply #5 on: May 12, 2012, 05:45:09 AM »

Rayne, I beg to differ. According to the entry, Remusian women are, in fact, allowed to own property and even - perhaps, in a more progressive big city - run businesses; but, in the same sentence, it is stated clearly that they are excluded from the military and politics.
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Leif Terskun
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« Reply #6 on: May 12, 2012, 06:01:41 AM »

Ah! Clearly I had things mixed up in my head. Thank you, Leif!
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Sorossa Ro
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« Reply #7 on: May 12, 2012, 07:57:58 AM »

So a big ethnic change is up! I kept her a half-Remusian, thus her psychical qualities can be explained genetically.  :) I changed the name which can be confusing but I hope it doesn't mind.
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Alýr (Rayne)
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« Reply #8 on: May 12, 2012, 12:23:42 PM »

Definitely a change in the right direction!  :)

You can probably eliminate the Remusian blood entirely: the light hair and blue eyes can be found in Erpheronian culture, after all. And Remusians, being typically proud of their own culture, would probably be less likely to marry a southern trader than one of their own. Also as a note: valuing hierarchy and authority and wanting to fight for beliefs and what's important are both very, very Erpheronian characteristics. :)  An excellent fit for you, I think!

Your history is a bit scant. Perhaps you can fill in a bit more about your family, any brothers or sisters, or persons who might have influenced Sorossa as she was growing up. I'm not sure who this hooded figure is suppose to be, or how he or she introduces Sorossa to the world of spying. Who is this person? When does he/she approach Sorossa, and why? How old is Sorossa when she becomes a spy, and how is she trained? There's quite a bit lacking here!

While the Kasumarii tribe didn't work out for your needs, they do have a rather deadly 'exchange program' where students from Santharia can be trained as assassins and (I assume) spies. About a third perish. Things like Shadowmancy and other such things may be useful to your character.

As a note, your "Paranoia" weakness doesn't actually seem to explain how it negatively affects your character! Perhaps you might explain this further?
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Deklitch Hardin
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« Reply #9 on: May 12, 2012, 04:50:53 PM »

I believe that Sarossa was wanting to play in Altario's story from SWIV. How likely is it that the changes being proposed (no Remusian blood) would fit in with what Altario wants with his story?

Just maybe wait and see what Altario says?

Dek
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Sorossa Ro
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« Reply #10 on: May 12, 2012, 06:32:22 PM »

I've extended the history section trying to all unclear parts, including Remusian mother. I want Sorossa to be a part of the SW IV and I think that it's better when she's at least partly Remusian. But I'm willing to change this if needed.

I also explained how her paranoia affects her. I added a strength (bilingualism) and a weakness (overconfidence).

I made her trained by the Kasumarii but I decided that the Korenjaans would fit much better. Shadowmancy is cool but I don't want/need her to have magical skills.

I also gave her a knife. Do you think I need to add a strength? I decided not to as it doesn't take much skill, I think, to cut someone's throat with a hunting knife - the skill is to get to them and that's a part of her stealth skill. But if you find it appropriate, I can add this strength too.

Looking forward to another comments!  :)
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Alýr (Rayne)
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« Reply #11 on: May 13, 2012, 01:16:49 PM »

I don't mind her being half-Remusian and half-Erpheronian. I will let Altario weigh in on the issue if he likes, as Dek kindly suggested.  :)


Quote
Almost always, she has some make-up on. Usually it includes some face powder, eye-brow powder, dark mascara, eye shadow and reddish lipstick as well as red nail polish on both her fingernails and toenails.
I had to do a little research on this, but a lot of make-up wasn't developed until the 19th century. In the middle ages, when paler was considered more beautiful, women would bleed themselves, and in the Renaissance, would apply lead paint to their face to lighten it--which of course 'lead' to many health issues (har, har--sorry, couldn't resist). I don't think much of what you've mentioned here has been invented yet in the time of Santharia, and probably won't be for another couple hundred years or so. Perhaps you might just have her be naturally beautiful?

Thank you for adding how the paranoia affects her--but it still doesn't seem to mention how this is a weakness rather than just part of her personality. What makes this a weakness? I would suggest insomnia, but you already have this mentioned! Perhaps it's not a weakness but merely a personality-related idiosyncrasy?

I think being trained by the Kasumarii works well to give your character training--but I suspect that the voyage to and from Cyhalloi, not to mention the training itself, would be mighty pricey. I can't imagine her parents would make enough to send her, or would even want her to go! Perhaps she has some sort of sponsor--some rich noble who offers to pay her way in return for her services as a spy to gather information on his/her political adversaries? You could probably find a way to off the sponsor once you return--perhaps he or she is old and dies, or something else happens to him/her?

Speaking of her parents, how do they respond to her becoming a spy? Do they even know?  Shocked Maybe she keeps it secret from them?

I'm not as concerned with the knife being a strength. I think most people can hold and cut with a knife, and it doesn't sound like your character's going to be tossing them around or juggling them or anything.  ;)

Are you planning to start this story in Remusia or in Santharia? If the latter, than your character leaving off in Santharia is fine. If the former, you may need to find a way to get there... Let me know your intentions! :)
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Altario Shialt-eck-Gorrin
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« Reply #12 on: May 13, 2012, 01:46:45 PM »

Welcome, Sorossa. :)  I enjoyed reading this, having done so yesterday, then again today.  However, I did find some fundamental concerns, which Rayne has brought up previously.  I see that you have adjusted for some of them, though I'm not sure if it has been enough.

I think it would be better if, like Rayne suggests, you eliminate the Remusian blood entirely.  I don't see that it contibutes in any way to your character as written, and only complicates it needlessly.  Leaving it feels a bit gimmicky, and if it is your intention to create the character with Remusian blood simply to be in SW IV, then it might indeed be gimmicky.  I would rather have a well written non Remusian in my story than a Remusian/part-Remusian character that did not ring true to the tribe.  Remember, too, that not all SW IV stories will be set in Remusia, so a well written spy will find a spot in SW IV regardless of tribe.  So, best to put your writing talents into making the best spy you can. :)

Now, to that end, like Rayne, I have questions about her history. She goes from no one to "Soon, Sorossa was regarded an excellent spy" very quickly.  For whom did she spy, and on whom?  There have not been any major wars recently for her to go on assignments.  Who was the hooded man?  Why pick her?  After all, she seems to have at least a couple of screws loose. :P

I don't see that there are many major hurdles here, just a bit of tweaking and expanding and you should be good to go.

Good luck. :)
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Sorossa Ro
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« Reply #13 on: May 13, 2012, 08:40:13 PM »

Thanks for the comment!

So, here I am. Gradually changed from 100% Remusian to 100% Erpheronian.  :)

I tried to add some explanations to the history. The main is that the hooded man was a Kasumarii recruiter... and I mentioned that she has worked for some wealthy people. Please, let me know if this is enough or if there is something more I should add.
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Alýr (Rayne)
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« Reply #14 on: May 14, 2012, 07:17:50 AM »

It seems like my last post might have been overlooked! (Make sure you review all the comments you've received; sometimes comments are easy to miss when multiple people comment)
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