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Author Topic: Stefan Skanris/Avenorrian/"legitimate businessman" (smuggler)  (Read 3857 times)
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Stefan Skanris
"Legitimate Businessman"
Approved Character
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Offline Offline

Posts: 9

Human Avennorian


« on: May 13, 2012, 08:49:42 AM »

Name

Stefan Skanris


Gender


Male

Age


22

Race


Human

Tribe


Avennorian

Occupation

While Stefan would describe himself as a "legitimate businessman." in reality he makes his money through smuggling, profiteering and from to time a bit of simple thuggery, depending upon how the mood takes him.


Title

"legitimate businessman" (smuggler)


APPEARANCE


Height


1 Ped, 2 Fores, 1 Palmspan, 3 Nailsbreadths

Weight


1 Pygge, 3 Hebs, 1 Hafeb, 4 Ods, 7 Mut

Hair Colour


Dark blonde

Eye Colour

Blue

Physical Appearance

Stefan does not cut a particularly imposing figure, certainly not when compared to the warriors that fill the ranks the armies of the world, he is not particularly tall, 'nor overly muscled, if anything his build is slender compared to others of his age and tribe. Yet, despite this he walks with the confidence of one who has a supreme belief in his own abilities. If one was to see him without his shirt a number of small scars would be noted marking his body, some from general life and some clearly marks caused by blades. A dark blue tattoo slowly swerves its way up his back towards it's neck, the sinewy smoky patterns forming into a writhing dragon that snakes it's way up his skin and neck, it's opened maw finally ending just below Stefan's jawline.

His face is not particularly remarkable, in fact many would call it plain were it not for the curving scar that begins just in front of his left temple, slicing through his thin eyebrow and narrowly missing his eye finally coming to a halt by the bridge of his nose. His eyes are relatively deep-set and appear to dart around taking in information from around the room. When he smiles it is lopsided and a row of surprisingly well kept teeth can be seen behind his lips. His hair is a little unkempt, although Stefan does make some attempts to keep to relatively cleanly and his face seems to have a sparse ever-present stubble that appears to resist all attempts to use a razor upon it.

His voice is a little rough at times and his accent is a little hard to place, although it is clear he is no high-born noble.

Clothing


Stefan's clothes are relatively simple and practical, he tends to wear a long sleeve shirt dyed to darker colours along with similar trousers, his boots are, of course, whale-skin and he tends to have a thick heavy cloak around his shoulders that has a large hood that he uses to conceal his appearance, although at times this can draw more attention to ones-self.

PERSONALITY & ABILITIES


Personality

While Stefan rarely shows his true face to the world at large, for to do so would put him at a severe disadvantage, certain parts of one's personality are impossible to hide, no matter how hard one tries.

Stefan is often considered to be a cruel uncaring man, rarely moved by the plights of others and he likes to paint the image that he is willing to do, or facilitate, just about anything for the right amount of coin (which tends to be rather a lot). While he appears to be at ease with those around him he rarely (with the odd notable exception) shows any desire to make any meaningful connections and seems to hold most people at arms length.

He is a very pragmatic individual, if it is in his interests he will happily spin on a san and work for his once bitter rival...however by the same token, if an alliance is no longer in his interests.... well, you know what they say about daggers and backs.

Stefan's travels have brought him into contact with many of the races that are scattered around Santheria and his pragmatism has served him well in this regard. He is willing to deal with the members of other races and does not hold any particular dislike of them but he does have a habit of viewing members of other species by their stereotypes and he has little interest in learning their ways or beliefs. In short, Stefan recognises that being willing to work with the other races, despite the issues that arise with it, opens enough doors to be worth the trouble.

He also uses misdirection and misinformation to keep the upper hand in interactions with others, he keeps his actual motives and cards close to his chest and is quite likely to tell two people two completely different stories, if it fits his aims.

Stefan also prefers to improvise his plans in the moment and is known to be unpredictable, willful and quite arbitrary in his actions due to his tendency to act in the heat of the moment, regardless of the consequences.
Stefan.

Stefan has an innate impatience that drives many of his actions. If he cannot do something quickly he sees little point in waiting around for it. This impatience also leads to Stefan becoming bored incredibly easily which often leads to him attempting very risky plans or simply abandoning a plot out of sheer boredom. This tendency to get bored also exacerbates his habit of gambling.

To Stefan the world and life is a game. And it is a game he fully intends to win.  


Strengths and Weaknesses


Strengths:


Sharp intellect While Stefan is certainly not what one would call... scholarly, he has a quick mind and strong intellect that allows him to learn things with a surprisingly rapid speed. If he had been born into a holy order or had the fortune to learn the magical arts, he may have risen quite high in society, instead however he uses it to advance his goals in the underworld.


Good at fighting with daggers and more...unconventional methods In Stefan's line of work it pays to be at least proficient at fighting, especially when you're not expecting to fight. Stefan has more than a little skill with his daggers and is slightly above average with a cutlass due to his background. Stefan is good enough at general brawling that he can fight his way out of a sticky situation... Of course, he'd never be able to stand toe to toe with a proper warrior.


Skilled at improvisation To a casual observer Stefan's ability at improvisation makes it almost seem like he always has a plan, in reality he is merely incredibly good at weighing up the odds in the moment and making a snap judgement, which usually turns out to be the right one. This skill means that Stefan is able to adapt to a changing situation quickly and more often than not, unpredictably.


Perceptive and Good at reading people Stefan has a surprisingly good ability to read people's body language and facial expressions, while he obviously cannot tell what someone is thinking he is good at gauging peoples reactions and attitudes and immediate aims due to how they stand or where they look. This allows him to have a vague perception of what is about to happen when others may not realise it. This is coupled with an eye for detail and noticing things that others may miss. This gives him an advantage in many situations and allows him to react much more quickly than the average person might to a sudden change in situation.



Persuasive and resourceful While Stefan's looks are nothing special he can be very persuasive when he wishes to be, using misdirection, promises, misinformation, threats, charm, anything at his disposal that he believes will get him what he wants. While Stefan would never make a diplomat he does have an ability to bluff his way out of bad situations and get a better deal when he needs it.



Ambitious Stefan is ambitious and is willing to do anything to achieve his aims, whatever they may be at the time. He rarely feels remorse (and would never show it) and is willing to go to extreme lengths in the pursuit of his goals and he will not allow anyone or anything to stand in his way.


Traveller Stefan has travelled a lot in his short life, much of it by boat but also by cart, horse and foot. This has given him a knowledge of the world and he has some skill at riding horses. This habit of travelling has made Stefan slightly more flexible to most cultures. It has also allowed him to build up a small network of contacts in a number of different cities, although it is nothing spectacular and many were killed in the raid upon his organisation.  

Seamanship Due to his travels and line of work Stefan has spent a lot of time travelling by boat and has learnt a number of tips and tricks that help keep a boat running smoothly, he also doesn't get seasick.


Card player Stefan is good at cards. Not least because of his habit of cheating, this leads him to play various card games to pass the time and he tends to win.

Weaknesses:


Impatience Unfortunately, Stefan's ability to improvise was borne from his inability to sit down and plan something for more than 5 minutes, or wait for someone, or not do ANYTHING. Stefan prefers to act and do so quickly and will often opt for an option that gives short term gratification or gains rather than going for what might be a more beneficial long term option.


Overconfidence While confidence may be considered a good trait, Stefan has it in excess. He is so sure of his own abilities that he does not believe he can fail (or if he does fail he is rather good at assigning the blame to an outside influence). This is especially dangerous when coupled with his impatience and can lead him to making him some incredibly rash moves.
  

Easily bored and distracted Stefan's intellect does have the drawback of making him very easily bored, he requires his mind to be near constantly occupied doing something or he begins to become frustrated, bad tempered and very difficult to deal with. This leads to a few strange habits, such as drumming his fingers on the table, making puzzles out of copper coins on bar tables and a general poor temper when he has nothing to do. This can make him a little...frustrating to deal with.

Distinctive scar Stefan is plain, doesn't cut an imposing figure and knows how to blend into a crowd relatively well, in fact he would be near perfect for his walk of life were it not for the distinctive scar upon his face. This scar means that unless he is hiding his features he is easier to find than most in his line of work and it makes hiding from the guards more than a little difficult. Strangely this doesn't seem to bother Stefan who seems to take a perverse pleasure in the fact that those around him know exactly who he is and at times he claims it helps him to "hide in plain sight", which is clearly not true.

Fiercely independent and individualist Stefan will not bow to any authority that is not his own, he holds his own individual freedom and ability to operate above all else and will do anything to protect it. He will work in an equal partnership but refuses to be a subordinate which can make him very inflexible in negotiations. It also means he has a dislike for those who prostate themselves before their "betters" and this even extends to his own followers, to an extent. This also makes it difficult for him to work well as a "team player" since self sacrifice for the greater good means very little to him.

Gambler Stefan takes excessive risks for very little reason and he has been known to bet everything he owns on one hand, if he allows himself to get drawn into the game too much... And Stefan ALWAYS allows himself to get drawn into the game. His fortune rises and falls rather rapidly due to this.

Mushroom allergy Stefan is highly allergic to mushrooms, so much so that ingesting them would probably be deadly, not that he has ever attempted such a feat, the intense itching and tears that he gets when he comes into prolonged contact with them is more than enough to put him off. It is a trait that his father supposedly had. Stefan does his best to mask the allergy by claiming he simply hates mushrooms, but it does make his life a little more difficult.


Despises knights Due to a relatively recent run in with a small group of hedge knights Stefan has developed an extreme hatred for these men of law and order and will do anything within his power to hurt a knight or his order, even if it greatly inconveniences him.

HISTORY

Childhood

Stefan was born in a small inconsequential coastal fishing town. His mother was a tavern wench and his father a whaler. Stefan's father was lost at sea on a whale hunt when Stefan was seven years old and his mother essentially died from grief a few months later and a family friend took Stefan in. This man was Daigier Joskom. Daigier was a small-time independent merchant  with a shady reputation who often traded with Stefan's father for whale-skin and had taken Stefan in as a favour, although he never really explained to Stefan why he took a small child onto his boat, although people did often comment upon the similarity of some of Daigier and Stefan's features and at times they were mistaken for father and son

Teenage years

Stefan spent the next 6 years of his life travelling with Daigier, across land and sea, he helped out with what he could and by the time he reached his early teens he had shown a startling ability to pick up and learn new abilities and he seemed to have a keen sense of those around him, sometimes even haggling for Daigier, who was beginning to get on in years. Stefan spent much of his early life watching sailors and caravan guards playing cards and his love of gambling and card games began to take form.

As his teenage years dragged on Stefan began to take a keener interest in how Daigier got his goods across and became more and more involved in the daily business of trading, soon learning how his adoptive father managed to maximise profits by dodging certain 'unfair' taxes that were levies at city gates. Stefan also began to have his first encounters with the black market as he was sent by his "father" to do deals with some of the shadier members of society.

Life continued like this for a number of years and Stefan began to learn the subtle ways that business was done in the underworld and it turned out that he had a talent for it, sometimes even 'transporting' the goods on his own when Daigier was occupied with other matters. Life continued apace, Stefan picking up tips and tricks from his company and steadily turning into a model rogue and smuggler until a fateful night on Stefan's 17th winter.

The deal was no different from many others that he and Daigier had done, except for the fact that there was a lot more money involved and a great deal more goods, too many really, but Stefan had convinced Daigier to take the risk. After all, why go for the small jobs when one big job could keep you set for life? It was all going well, the goods had been delivered to the client and their gold was about to be brought to them... Rather, that is how it should have played out. Instead their "clients" turned their bows and weapons upon Stefan and Daigier, causing the room to erupt into a battle. The fight was short, bloody and brutal. At the end of it the three guards that Stefan and Daigier had brought with them were dead as were the clients who had turned upon them, Stefan had a nasty gash that trailed from his temple and narrowly missed his eye, along with a number of other injures and Daigier was lying on the floor, a pool of his own blood rapidly spreading around him. Stefan could barely hear his "father's" last words as the life drained from his body; he tore his pendant from his neck and pressed it into Stefan's hands, bidding him to make his mark upon the world.



The adult years

After Daigier's death Stefan had the blue dragon tattooed upon his skin. Dragons were creatures that both Stefan and Daigier had always felt an affinity with, even if they had never and probably never would see one. Their power, individuality and their freedom resonated within Stefan and the tattoo helped him to have a physical representation of what he believed upon his body. It reminded him of what Daigier had taught him, of who he was and how his life had entered a new stage, one that he could not turn back from or change. The permanence of it appealed to Stefan and he uses it as a reminder that regrets are pointless, for your past always follows you.

Stefan continued much as he had in his teenage years, except now he had full autonomy and his heart had been hardened greatly. He took his uncle's ship, a small fast cargo vessel named the Wraith's Jewel, and began to ship illegal goods across the continent, often bringing the small ship up the larger rivers or trading deeper in land. As his wealth increased Stefan began to seek ever fast ways of gaining money, everything from fencing to murder to simple thuggery, it appeared as though Stefan wished to have a finger in every pie. Stefan's attempts to branch out did make him a few enemies and he ran into difficulties with the stormcloaks on a few occasions and while he made sure gold got into the hands of the right people, his relationship with the group is not exactly amiable.  As time went on Stefan began to gather a following of local misfits, thugs, smugglers and thieves and he began to build a small and dedicated crime syndicate that preyed upon the locals and slowly began to worm it's way across Santharia. Stefan himself often getting his hands dirty.


It all seemed to be going rather well, Stefan had his organisation and a reasonable amount of wealth, but they had become too over-confident and a full scale raid upon a local lords caravan carrying the military payroll caused them to gain a rather impressive bounty upon their heads and they came to the attention of a group of unlanded knights, seeking honour and glory. These knights attacked Stefan and his men, slaughtering and scattering the group and forcing Stefan to flee to the Wraith's Jewel only just escaping the knights and causing him to loose much of his wealth and resources.

Stefan's luck, which seemed to have a nasty habit of working in extremes, then caused him to run into a storm, severely damaging his ship and leaving it near useless, until he could afford to fix it.

Now, with a battered ship, barely a coin left to his name, his organisation in ruins and his life having hit somewhat of a bump... We pick up Stefan's story.

ACCESSORIES

Weapons


One long dagger on his belt

a dagger hidden in his boot

a slightly battered cutlass hanging from his belt at times.

Belongings

The Wraith's Jewel, a battered small cargo ship, not really seaworthy at this point

one coin-purse with a rather...limited amount of coins.

Daigier's pendant, in the shape of a dragon, Stefan believes it to be lucky.

A deck of cards

Two loaded dice (one always rolls a six and the other a one) three none-loaded dice

« Last Edit: May 17, 2012, 06:04:06 AM by Alýr (Rayne) » Logged
Ryvic Darkveil
Haunted Altruist
Approved Character
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 141


Human, Erpheronian


« Reply #1 on: May 13, 2012, 11:07:49 AM »

Your line-spacing is pretty inconsistent. You should fix that to make it easier to read and thus faster to approve. You could also use other formatting like underlining to make headers stand out better.


Name
Stefan Skanris

((I am aware I didn't use a name from the list, I simply thought that it fit in with the tribes general language, however if it needs to be changed I can do so))
Names are pretty lenient. I think that's fine.

Gender
Male

Age
22

Race
Human

Tribe
Avenorrian Avennorian. Two n's, one r.

Occupation
While Stefan would describe himself as a "legitimate businessman." in reality he makes his money through smuggling, profiteering and from to time a bit of simple thuggery, depending upon how the mood takes him.


Title
((I am having some difficulty with the title as while Stefan does tend to concentrate upon smuggling and it's related activity he is perhaps more of a... crime lord or crime boss leaning type, although he is not well known 'nor powerful enough to be at that level yet...so))

"Legitimate Businessman" (smuggler) <-- So that's the title? Consider putting it before the explanation to avoid confusion.


Character Portrait (optional) If you don't have anything for an optional section, just don't include the header.
n/a.


APPEARANCE

Height
1 Ped, 2 Fores, 1 Palmspan, 3 Nailsbreadths

Weight
1 Pygge, 3 Hebs, 1 Hafeb, 4 Ods, 7 Mut

Hair Colour
Dark blonde

Eye Colour
Blue


This section looks good! A couple typos and grammar things is all I see.
Physical Appearance

Stefan does not cut a particularly imposing figure, certainly not when compared to the warriors that fill the ranks the armies of the world, he is not particularly tall, 'nor overly muscled, if anything his build is slender compared to others of his age and tribe. Yet, despite this he walks with the confidence of one who has a supreme belief in his own abilities. If one was to see him without his shirt a number of small scars would be noted marking his body, some from general life and some clearly marks caused by blades. A dark blue tattoo slowly swerves it's its way up his back towards it's neck, the sinewy smoky patterns forming into a writhing dragon that snakes it's way up his skin and neck, it's opened maw finally ending just below Stefan's jawline.

His face is not particularly remarkable, in fact many would call it plain were it not for the curving scar that just begins just in front of his left temple, slicing through his thin eyebrow and narrowly missing his eye finally coming to a halt by the bridge of his nose. His eyes are relatively deep-set and appear to dart around taking in information from around the room. When he smiles it is lopsided and a row of surprisingly well kept teeth can be seen behind his lips. His hair is a little unkempt, although Stefan does make some attempts to keep to relatively cleanly and his face seems to have a sparse ever-present stubble that appears to resist all attempts to use a razor upon it.

His voice is a little rough at times and his accent is a little hard to place, although it is clear he is no high-born noble.

Clothing

Stefan's clothes are relatively simple and practical, he tends to wear a long sleeve shirt dyed to darker colours along with similar trousers, his boots are, of course, whale-skin and he tends to have a thick heavy cloak around his shoulders that has a large hood that he uses to conceal his appearance, although at times this can draw more attention to ones-self.


PERSONALITY & ABILITIES


Your S&W seems to have some personality traits you don't mention in the personality section. You could add those to it and expand it if you want.
Personality

While Stefan rarely shows his true face to the world at large, for to do so would put him at a severe disadvantage, certain parts of one(apostrophe)s personality are impossible to hide, no matter how hard one tries.

Stefan is often considered to be a cruel uncaring man, rarely moved by the plights of others and he likes to paint the image that he is willing to do, or facilitate, just about anything for the right amount of coin (which tends to be rather a lot). While he appears to be at ease with those around him he rarely (with the odd notable exception) shows any desire to make any meaningful connections and seems to hold most people at arms length.

He is a very pragmatic individual, if it is in his interests he will happily spin on a dime and work for his once bitter rival...however by the same token, if an alliance is longer in his interests.... well, you know what they say about daggers and backs.

He also uses misdirection and misinformation to keep the upper hand in interactions with others, he keeps his actual motives and cards close to his chest and is quite likely to tell two people two completely different stories, if it fits his aims.

Stefan also prefers to improvise his plans in the moment and is known to be unpredictable, willful and quite arbitrary in his actions due to his tenancy to act in the heat of the moment, regardless of the consequences.
Stefan.

To Stefan the world and life is a game. And it is a game he fully intends to win.  


Strengths and Weaknesses

   Strengths:

Skilled at improvisation To a casual observer Stefan's ability at improvisation makes it almost seem like he always has a plan, in reality he is merely incredibly good at weighing up the odds in the moment and making a snap judgement, which usually turns out to be the right one. This skill means that Stefan is able to adapt to a changing situation quickly and more often than not, unpredictably.

Good-night sight While not truly incredible, Stefan is slightly better than most at seeing in the dark

capital Good at fighting with daggers and more...unconventional methods In Stefan's line of work it pays to be at least proficient at fighting, especially when youryou're not expecting to fight. Stefan has more than a little skill with his daggers and is slightly above average with a cutlass due to his background. Stefan is good enough at general brawling that he can fight his way out of a sticky situation... Of course, he'd never be able to stand toe to toe with a proper warrior.

Perceptive and Good at reading people Stefan has a surprisingly good ability to read people(apostrophe)s body language and facial expressions, while he obviously cannot tell what someone is thinking he is good at gauging peoples reactions and attitudes and immediate aims due to how they stand or where they look. This allows him to have a vague perception of what is about to happen when others may not realise it. This is coupled with an eye for detail and noticing things that others may miss. This gives him an advantage in many situations and allows him to react much more quickly than the average person might to a sudden change in situation.

Sharp intellect While Stefan is certainly not what one would call... scholarly, he has a quick mind and strong intellect that allows him to learn things with a surprisingly rapid speed. If he had been born into a holy order or had the fortune to learn the magical arts, he may have risen quite high in society, instead however he uses it to advance his goals in the underworld.

Persuasive While Stefan's looks are nothing special he can be very persuasive when he wishes to be, using misdirection, promises, misinformation, threats, charm, anything at his disposal that he believes will get him what he wants. While Stefan would never make a diplomat he does give himhave an ability to bluff his way out of bad situations and get a better deal when he needs it.

capital Card player Stefan is good at cards. Not least because of his habit of cheating, this leads him to play various card games to pass the time and he tends to win.

Maybe you should split the boating skill into a separate strength.
Traveller Stefan has travelled a lot in his short life, much of it by boat but also by cart, horse and foot. This has given him a knowledge of the world and he has some skill at riding horses and a lot more skill, due to his tribe, upon a boat. This habit of travelling has made Stefan relatively flexible to most cultures. It has also allowed him to build up a small network of contacts in a number of different cities, although it is nothing spectacular.

Ambitious Stefan is ambitious and is willing to do anything to achieve his aims, whatever they may be at the time. He rarely feels remorse (and would never show it) and is willing to go to extreme lengths in the pursuit of his goals and he will not allow anyone or anything to stand in his way.

   Weaknesses:
  
Impatience Unfortunately, Stefan's ability to improvise was borne from his inability to sit down and plan something for more than 5 minutes, or wait for someone, or not do ANYTHING. Stefan prefers to act and do so quickly and will often opt for an option that gives short term gratification or gains rather than going for what might be a more beneficial long term option.

More sensitive to light changes This however means that a sudden light change will cause him discomfort.

No official martial training This is counteracted by the fact that Stefan was never trained how to fight with a sword (apart from a cutlass), or wear armour, so he tends to avoid anything larger than a long dagger and would never touch a spear or wear armour heavier than leather. This puts him at a severe disadvantage against opponents who have such training in a head to head fight. Not a weakness. We are supposed to compare characters to a completely unremarkable Joe Shmoe kinda guy with no special abilities or disabilities.

Overconfidence While confidence may be considered a good trait, Stefan has it in excess. He is so sure of his own abilities that he does not believe he can fail (or if he does fail he is rather good at assigning the blame to an outside influence). This is especially dangerous when coupled with his impatience and can lead him to making him some incredibly rash moves.

Easily bored and distracted Stefan's intellect does have the drawback of making him very easily bored, he requires his mind to be near constantly occupied doing something or he begins to become frustrated, bad tempered and very difficult to deal with. This leads to a few strange habits, such as drumming his fingers on the table, making puzzles out of copper coins on bar tables and a general poor temper when he has nothing to do. This can make him a little...frustrating to deal with.

Distinctive scar Stefan is plain, doesn't cut an imposing figure and knows how to blend into a crowd relatively well, in fact he would be near perfect for his walk of life were it not for the distinctive scar upon his face. This scar means that unless he is hiding his features he is easier to find than most in his line of work and it makes hiding from the guards more than a little difficult. Strangely this doesn't seem to bother Stefan who seems to take a perverse pleasure in the fact that those around him know exactly who he is and at times he claims it helps him to "hide in plain sight", which is clearly not true.

Gambler This does however lead Stefan to takes excessive risks for very little reason and he has been known to bet everything he owns on one hand, if he allows himself to get drawn into the game too much... And Stefan ALWAYS allows himself to get drawn into the game. His fortune rises and falls rather rapidly due to this and he is known to risk everything on a gamble. <- You said that last sentence before.

Mushroom allergy Stefan is highly allergic to mushrooms, so much so that ingesting them would probably be deadly, not that he has ever attempted such a feat, the intense itching and tears that he gets when he comes into prolonged contact with them is more than enough to put him off. It is a trait that his father supposedly had. Stefan does his best to mask the allergy by claiming he simply hates mushrooms, but it does make his life a little more difficult.

Fiercely independent and individualist Stefan will not bow to any authority that is not his own, he holds his own individual freedom and ability to operate above all else and will do anything to protect it. He will work in an equal partnership but refuses to be a subordinate which can make him very inflexible in negotiations. It also means he has a dislike for those who prostate themselves before their "betters" and this even extends to his own followers, to an extent. This also makes it difficult for him to work well as a "team player" since self sacrifice for the greater good means very little to him.

Despises knights Due to a relatively recent run in with a small group of hedge knights Stefan has developed an extreme hatred for these men of law and order and will do anything within his power to hurt a knight or his order, even if it greatly inconveniences him.


Magic (magic-users only) Nix this baby.
   N/A


HISTORY

History

Childhood

Stefan was born in a small inconsequential coastal fishing town. His mother was a tavern wench and his father a whaler. Stefan's father was lost at sea on a whale hunt when Stefan was seven years old and his mother essentially died from grief a few months later and a family friend took Stefan in. This man was Daigier Joskom. Daigier was a small-time independent merchant  with a shady reputation who often traded with Stefan's father for whale-skin and had taken Stefan in as a favour, although he never really explained to Stefan why he took a small child onto his boat, although people did often comment upon the similar colours of Daigier's and Stefan's eyes. Blue eyes are pretty common among Avennorians. Perhaps a bit more of an explanation here?

Teenage years

Stefan spent the next 6 years of his life travelling with Daigier, across land and sea, he helped out with what he could and by the time he reached his early teens he had shown a startling ability to pick up and learn new abilities and he seemed to have a keen sense of those around him, sometimes even haggling for Daigier, who was beginning to get on in years. Stefan spent much of his early life watching sailors and caravan guards playing cards and his love of gambling and card games began to take form.

As his teenage years dragged on Stefan began to take a keener interest in how Daigier got his goods across and became more and more involved in the daily business of trading, soon learning how his adoptive? 'father' managed to maximise profits by dodging certain 'unfair' taxes that were levies at city gates. Stefan also began to have his first encounters with the black market as he was sent by his "father" to do deals with some of the shadier members of society.

Life continued like this for a number of years and Stefan began to learn the subtle ways that business was done in the underworld and it turned out that he had a talent for it, sometimes even 'transporting' the goods on his own when Daigier was occupied with other matters. Life continued apace, Stefan picking up tips and tricks from his company and steadily turning into a model rogue and smuggler until a fateful night on Stefan's 17th winter.

The deal was no different from many others that he and Daigier had done, except for the fact that there was a lot more money involved and a great deal more goods, too many really, but Stefan had convinced Daigier to take the risk. After all, why go for the small jobs when one big job could keep you set for life? It was all going well, the goods had been delivered to the client and their gold was about to be brought to them... Rather, that is how it should have played out. Instead their "clients" turned their bows and weapons upon Stefan and Daigier, causing the room to erupt into a battle. The fight was short, bloody and brutal. At the end of it the three guards that Stefan and Daigier had brought with them were dead as were the clients who had turned upon them, Stefan had a nasty gash that trailed from his temple and narrowly missed his eye, along with a number of other injures and Daigier was lying on the floor, a pool of his own blood rapidly spreading around him. Stefan could barely hear his "father's" last words as the life drained from his body; he tore his pendant from his neck and pressed it into Stefan's hands, bidding him to make his mark upon the world.

The adult years

Stefan continued much as he had in his teenage years, except now he had full autonomy and his heart had been hardened greatly. He took his uncle's ship, a small fast cargo vessel named the Wraith's Jewel, and began to ship illegal goods across the continent, often bringing the small ship up the larger rivers or trading deeper in land. As his wealth increased Stefan began to seek ever fast ways of gaining money, everything from fencing to murder to simple thuggery, it appeared as though Stefan wished to have a finger in every pie. As time went on Stefan began to gather a following of local misfits, thugs, smugglers and thieves and he began to build a small and dedicated crime syndicate that prayedpreyed upon the locals and slowly began to worm it's way across Santharia. Stefan himself often getting his hands dirty.

It all seemed to be going rather well, Stefan had his organisation and a reasonable amount of wealth, but they had become too over-confident and a full scale raid upon a local lords caravan carrying the military payroll caused them to gain a rather impressive bounty upon their heads and they came to the attention of a group of unlanded knights, seeking honour and glory. These knights attacked Stefan and his men, slaughtering and scattering the group and forcing Stefan to flee to the wraiths jewelWraith's Jewel, only just escaping the knights and causing him to loose much of his wealth and resources.

Stefan's luck, which seemed to have a nasty habit of working in extremes, then caused him to run into a storm, severely damaging his ship and leaving it near useless, until he could afford to fix it.

Now, with a battered ship, barely a coin left to his name, his organisation in ruins and his life having hit somewhat of a bump... We pick up Stefan's story.

ACCESSORIES

Weapons

One long dagger on his belt

a dagger hidden in his boot

a slightly battered cutlass hanging from his belt at times.

Belongings

The Wraith's Jewel, a battered small cargo ship, not really seaworthy at this point

one coin-purse with a rather...limited amount of coins.

Daigier's pendant, in the shape of a dragon, Stefan believes it to be lucky.

A deck of cards

Two loaded dice (one always rolls a six and the other a one) three none-loaded dice

Stefan's journal/logbook where he writes his thoughts and jots down his plans and the writing materials for it. I think reading and writing is considered a strength.


Familiars (if any are present)Another header to remove, unless you get a pet.

N/a


Nicely written. I would suggest you watch your apostrophes a bit closer, though.
I hope this helps you get approved faster!
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To kill the beast is to kill the man, and to make peace with the beast is to smother the man.
Ryvic's CD
Stefan Skanris
"Legitimate Businessman"
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« Reply #2 on: May 13, 2012, 05:18:47 PM »

Made the suggested edits, anything added is in yellow :).

Thanks for that, no matter how much I write I always seem to end up with at least a few spelling or grammatical errors... You'd think spell check would help prevent the former :P.

Does he still looked balanced after I've fiddled with the strengths and weaknesses? I'm unsure.
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Emrah Lark
Swell Rogue on the Road
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« Reply #3 on: May 13, 2012, 08:53:30 PM »

Hello Stefan. I can't comment on language issues because I have problem with them myself. I'm also quite new over here so there's no reason why you should take me seriously.  :)

I really like this CD. And it makes me glad to see another criminal here. Oh, I'm sorry. You aren't one.  ;) A minor comment:
As for the title, I think when you'll use "Legitimate Businessman" (I mean actually putting the quotation marks there), it will be probably clear that there are some doubts about this legitimity. Also, you know, the title doesn't have to really explain and if he talks about himself as of a legitimate businessman, this title fits him better than any other.

By the way, I hope to see Emrah and Stefan playing cards against each other soon. Haha.

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"Yea, I be a proper gentleman."

Emrah Lark
Ryvic Darkveil
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« Reply #4 on: May 14, 2012, 01:59:24 PM »

The spacing is much better now.  Thumb up

As for the S&W, I think it needs a bit of work. I didn't do a super thorough examination, but I think a good first step would be to organize them from biggest to smallest. Currently, you have 'Good-night sight' before his knife skills. Once you have them ordered, it will be easier to compare.
I don't have any suggestions at the moment for more weaknesses, but if you can't think of anything else, here's my personal thoughts on the Strengths. Feel free to forget them if you have something else you'd rather do, or correct me/reply to any of these comments.

Skilled at improvisation
If you run out of options, this one could possibly go.

Good-night sight
You could probably drop this one. It never comes up in the history, and doesn't have much bearing that I see.

Good at fighting with daggers and more...unconventional methods
Seems pretty important to your character.

Perceptive and Good at reading people
See: Skilled at Improvisation.

Sharp intellect
Seems important in his history.

Persuasive
See: Skilled at Improvisation.

Card player
In your history you mention his wealth changes rapidly in both directions from his card gaming. Perhaps he's really not that skilled at cards?

Traveller
This one might be easy to scale down a bit.

Seamanship
Seeing as he has a boat, this is probably expected. But then, the boat could be dropped from his history without too much pain, I think.

Ambitious
I don't really know that this is much of a strength. I could well be wrong, though.


Note that these are just suggestions. It's your character, and if you think anything I didn't see as important is important, just ignore what I said.  :)
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To kill the beast is to kill the man, and to make peace with the beast is to smother the man.
Ryvic's CD
Stefan Skanris
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« Reply #5 on: May 15, 2012, 12:07:25 AM »

Okay, now they are in some kind of order as to what's more or less important, I removed the night-sight and it's associated weakness.

I've reworded traveller to make it a little less strong but I'd like to keep most of the other traits because Stefan isn't bad at playing cards (in my eyes) but the associated trait of "gambler" combined with his overconfidence often causes him to take extreme risks for the rush, hence his fortunes rising and falling when he gets carried away while playing... If that makes any sense outside of my own head. However if it is absolutely necessary I can remove certain traits I suppose.

And on the boat bit, I'd PREFER to try keep it if only because attempting to get his boat repaired was going to be an important part of his early devolpment as a character, and I had planned on using the battered boat as his "house" for a time
« Last Edit: May 15, 2012, 07:00:07 AM by Stefan Skanris » Logged
Alýr (Rayne)
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« Reply #6 on: May 15, 2012, 10:43:22 AM »

If I may step in: you may have as many strengths and weaknesses as you like. If you want to keep any strength-weakness pair, that's all right by me. It just depends on what kind of character you'd like to have. I have no problem with your strengths and weaknesses right now, and if you want to add in "Good Night Vision" and its associated weakness, that would probably be all right, too. You've done a fantastic job at balancing your character. My one request is to change "Persuasive" to "Persuasive and Resourceful", as he seems to be both.  :)

Your character is fine by me, and has my approval. I especially like that you explain how each weaknesses is a weakness, and how each strength is a strength. You also do a great job of developing these strengths, weaknesses, and you personality through the history. Great job!

A few little things, if you have the time:

Quote
A dark blue tattoo slowly swerves its way up his back towards it's neck, the sinewy smoky patterns forming into a writhing dragon that snakes it's way up his skin and neck, it's opened maw finally ending just below Stefan's jawline.
I'm having trouble picturing this. I assume the dragon comes up the back, across the side of the neck, and to the jawline? Is that right? It's really not a big issue; just curious!

Quote
He is a very pragmatic individual, if it is in his interests he will happily spin on a dime and work for his once bitter rival...
Perhaps instead of a "dime", you might use some Santharian currency? Maybe a san or a silverbard? ;)

It's not required to include this, but as your character seems to have gotten around quite a bit, I would be curious to know how he feels about members of other races, like elves, hobbits, orcs, psyrpents, dwarves, etc. Does he get along well with them? (Perhaps he gets along well with anyone he can squeeze a coin out of?) Is there any race he avoids? Or maybe he hasn't had much interaction with other races after all?

As a note, and this is just for your knowledge, there is a shipping guild in Santharia known as the Stormcloak Guild. They would like be a group your character knows about or had run across before.  :)


I will try to nudge one of the other moderators or minimoderators in here to give you final approval.

BTW--thank you, Ryvic, for your help!
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Ryvic Darkveil
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« Reply #7 on: May 15, 2012, 01:36:42 PM »

I've reworded traveller to make it a little less strong but I'd like to keep most of the other traits because Stefan isn't bad at playing cards (in my eyes) but the associated trait of "gambler" combined with his overconfidence often causes him to take extreme risks for the rush, hence his fortunes rising and falling when he gets carried away while playing... If that makes any sense outside of my own head. However if it is absolutely necessary I can remove certain traits I suppose.
Yes, I think it's more balanced now.
As for the Card Playing, I think it was the phrase "and he tends to win." that threw me off. I understand that he can win, but he apparently takes unnecessary risks for the rush. A slight rewording should help with that.


Quote
And on the boat bit, I'd PREFER to try keep it if only because attempting to get his boat repaired was going to be an important part of his early development as a character, and I had planned on using the battered boat as his "house" for a time.
As I said, feel free to correct me. I was just thinking that is could go if he turned out to be really unbalanced. But it looks good. Much easier to see the balance when they're organized.

Also, you can remove the yellow from "Seamanship".

If I could, I would approve you. But I can't. :P
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Ryvic's CD
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« Reply #8 on: May 15, 2012, 05:44:21 PM »

Okay, i've made the changes and cleared it up... I THINK it's finished, but usually when I say that I end up writing another five paragraphs.

Thank you for all your help Ryvic :)


Quote
I'm having trouble picturing this. I assume the dragon comes up the back, across the side of the neck, and to the jawline? Is that right? It's really not a big issue; just curious!

That's pretty much it, imagine it coming up the back, along the shoulder blade sort of area and the neck of it twisting up towards Stefan's neck and then the maw stopping by the jawline

Quote
Perhaps instead of a "dime", you might use some Santharian currency? Maybe a san or a silverbard? ;)

Ohh, I like that, spin on a san, sounds better lol. Sometimes I forget to include little things like that, bad habit of mine.

Quote
It's not required to include this, but as your character seems to have gotten around quite a bit, I would be curious to know how he feels about members of other races, like elves, hobbits, orcs, psyrpents, dwarves, etc. Does he get along well with them? (Perhaps he gets along well with anyone he can squeeze a coin out of?) Is there any race he avoids? Or maybe he hasn't had much interaction with other races after all?

Added it to his personality. Essentially he is mostly ambivalent but his view is coloured by the stories and myths he heard as a child even if he is willing to deal with just about anyone if it suits him.

Quote
As a note, and this is just for your knowledge, there is a shipping guild in Santharia known as the Stormcloak Guild. They would like be a group your character knows about or had run across before.  :)

Ohh, I missed that, thank you. I've added a brief mention of them to his history but that certainly does make things more interesting.

Thank you again and I look forward to the RP :)
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Irid alMenie
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« Reply #9 on: May 15, 2012, 11:44:22 PM »

One smallish question on my side - Stefan has a tattoo, of a dragon running up his back. I would think that something like that is a rather significant event in his life. Perhaps you could add the reason why he took this tattoo in the history?

Otherwise this is a very nicely written character and I hope you'll really enjoy playing him :)

Oh, there was one more minor thing that I noticed while reading:

 if an alliance is longer in his interests > I think you mean no longer, otherwise the rest of the sentence doesn't make sense :)
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Irid al'Menie
Stefan Skanris
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« Reply #10 on: May 16, 2012, 12:02:48 AM »

I have added a brief mention of the tattoo in history, I had been planning on expanding upon it at some point but I had not gotten around to it, and i've fixed the error you found.
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Leif Terskun
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« Reply #11 on: May 17, 2012, 02:46:01 AM »

Hey Stefan! Great to see more Avennorians on the boards.

I've just got a couple of things to say - Ryvic, Emrah and Rayne have done a great job.

As to your title, I would say that it doesn't have to be an absolute summary of your character - you're not expected to find one or two words that encapsulate your entire CD perfectly. If Stefan would talk of himself as a "Legitimate Businessman", then I think it fits him to a T as a title; it has a lovely hint of knowing irony and wide-eyed innocence!

You've got a couple of rogue apostrophes as well, I noticed. A few instances of "it's" where you want "its". You also have a simple "Stefan." at the end of the third-last paragraph of your personality. I don't know if you intended to make that a full sentence or if it was lost in an edit.

Regardless, I like your CD. I've got no content-related quibbles with it. If you want, you can look through it for those things I mentioned, but don't feel obligated. You have my approval.

God, it feels weird to say that.

Have fun role-playing! I look forward to coming across you in a tavern somewhere.

"To Stefan the world and life is a game. And it is a game he fully intends to win." Heh-heh. Lovely.  Thumb up
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Leif Terskun
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« Reply #12 on: May 17, 2012, 04:54:24 AM »

Content looks good to me.  Thumb up
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Alýr (Rayne)
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« Reply #13 on: May 17, 2012, 06:06:40 AM »

Titled and Archived. (After much chaos  buck) You're ready to play. Congratulations.  :)
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