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Author Topic: Santhalian White Hart, Beast, Poisonous Deer  (Read 4270 times)
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Gaffin
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« on: 03 September 2007, 05:51:45 »

This is my first bestiary entry, on the White Hart - the white, and more graceful cousin of the venemous, goat-like Santhalian Black Hart.



Beneath the eaves of the Zeiphyrian Forest, the graceful Santhalian White Hart lounges placidly in the shade. This small deer is a close cousin to the Black Hart, and scholars suggest that it is the result of crossbreeding between a doe-less buck and a Sarvonian White Deer. It is slightly larger than its black counterpart, although the poison that protects the Black Hart also courses through its veins.

Appearance. While both species are considered beautiful in their own right, the White Hart is said to be the more graceful of the two. The average male stands a little over 2 peds, with the female about a fore shorter. Their long, gray antlers curve away from their heads toward their tails, and the points are very sharp; however, as a rule they are not nearly as intricate as the Black Hart’s, andmeasure slightly less than a fore to as long as a fore and two palmspans.

Typically, the deer has keen, pale blue eyes for spotting obstacles in the darkness under the thick canopy of the forest – which is necessary, because it can weave its way through the wood nearly as fast as a galloping horse and as agile as a kitten. Its coat has two layers; the top is completely white, with sleek and smooth hair woven tightly together to help protect it against some predators (it is not very effective against a determined hunting hound, of course), and to help keep its delicate body warm in the winter; its second coat is a curly mass of light gray hair – invisible under its elegant top coat, but essential to its health nonetheless – that protect it from the bites of blood-sucking insects. The White Hart’s hide is rarely used by hunters, as it is considered an ill omen, but some nomadic tribes disregard such superstitions and use the whole beast.

Special Abilities. Even those who are capable to feed on the fell meat of the beast have a terrible time tracking and hunting it, because of its incredible agility and eyesight. Indeed, few actually bother to engage in such a rigorous exercise, as it is usually fruitless anyway – and not usually worth the effort. If successfully trapped, one must be wary of its antlers, which will drip poison if the animal is threatened, and even a small scratch on the arm will cause an intense and normally fatal illness. Some cases of Hart Poisoning have been observed, and the victims have all died in agony: a few moments after becoming inflicted, the subject will begin to get drowsy. A minute or so later, they will be almost completely paralyzed, and their muscles will start convulsing uncontrollably. Usually, the subject vomits a tacky, sticky substance several times during this – and will die either of a failure of the heart, or by drowning in the bile.

This same poison is also present in the meat of the deer, and will cause similar effects to most subjects. However, some nomadic tribes of humans are reputed to be able to consume it without trouble, as are some species of hounds, such as the Ashmarian Wolf. Strangely, no elves, regardless of tribe, have been able to withstand the meat's poison.

Territory. The White Hart is usually found in the mid-southern area of the Sarvonian continent – namely, the provinces of Manthria and Sanguia, within the twin Zeiphyrian Forests and the Auturian Woods. Flushes, or groups of deer, are also sometimes found farther north, around the Tandala Highlands. For the most part, though, it prefers the shade of deep forests.

Habit/Behavior. The Hart is not often found away from its flush, which is slightly smaller than that of the Black Hart – typically two to four individuals, with some of the larger groups containing half a dozen deer. Like its cousin, however, men fear lone White Harts; unlike the Black Hart, though, it is only chased from the area, and not killed and burned. The average day consists of the deer grazing in early morning out on the vast fields and plains full of Alth'ho Grass, then spending the day lounging around water holes, rivers, or deep in the shade of the trees. They stay hidden until early dusk, when the deer emerge again for the final feeding of the day, after which they hide again to sleep.

Diet. The main food source for the White Hart is Alth'ho Grass, which grows abundantly in its territory. But this Hart will eat anything that grows, including Krakenweed and the leaves of the Adlemir Tree. The White Hart is also known to eat many poisonous plants that dwell in the area. While these plants can kill most other creatures, this deer’s stomach lining is thought to be much thicker than most animals’ or people’s. This is why the deer thrives on the poison, even though the poison leaves the stomach and flows throughout the deer's body and into the tips of the antlers and the ends of the hair.

Mating. Does from the flushes usually give birth twice a year, once in spring and once in fall. Males are ready to mate when they sense the females are in heat, which they can smell from a long distance. Unusually, male White Harts are reputed to stay with their does for a lifetime, something very uncommon among animals. During the mating season, couples set off on their own to reproduce, and flushes are remade a few weeks later.

Usages. Besides being a food source for various wolves, the hardy Santhalian tribes that feed on the White Hart also use its antlers for the contruction of basic tools, such as daggers and other weapons, as they are very hard and sharp. Its hide, however, is said to be cursed and very few tribes - save the most ignorant or barbaric - elect to use it.

Myth/Lore. The deer is said to be the result of the crossbreeding between the Black Hart and the Sarvonian White Deer. There is a myth passed among the nomads of the Santhala area that attempts to explain this:

When the God of the Hunt, Arvins, observed what was happening to the Black Hart, he was filled with sorrow; for he considered it to be the fairest of all game, and shed a tear for them. They were meant to be a beautiful, graceful, peaceful breed, but they were not at all. They lived their lives in bloodshed and greed. The bucks of the species wanted all the does they could handle, and more than they could, which made for fierce possession battles, and a lethal competition that raged on daily. So Arvins, with a broken heart, drew from the earth a vile poison, and implanted it into the very heart of the deer, where it spread throughout the entire body, until it reached the tips of the horns.

There was one very wretched deer in particular that stalked the forests in loneliness, searching in vain for a doe that would have him. He was sorrowful and tired, for he had been looking for a decade, eating when he was hungry and drinking when he thirsted for it; but he was always walking, always looking, always on the move from one place to another – and he did not want this anymore, for he was weary.

One night in the middle of winter, he bent over an icy stream to fill his parched throat. His fur was mottled and torn in places, and he was panting in exhaustion and his feet were throbbing from walking all day. He bent too far in his desire for water, and he fell into the stream with a cry. Its pace quickened and violently carried him off. He could not make his way onto the bank, as hard as he fought – he was tossed and turned, and he was freezing. The stream bore him far.

He awoke hours later on the bank of that same stream. He was in a strange forest, and could tell that it wasn’t his; it smelled different, and the trees were shorter. It was still nighttime and dark. He despaired, because he was lost and cold and frightened. Out of the darkness came a pale glowing figure, graceful and elegant, and she told him not to be afraid. He followed her back to her home, and she fed him and showed him the ways of her forest. Soon he was comfortable with the forest, and they lounged together and ate the grass together, and they loved each other very much. One icy, winter night, the beautiful doe bore thirteen children, who had the horns of their father – but they were white and beautiful like their mother. The Black Hart died in delight, alongside his doe – and the children lounged together amiably in the grass and learned the ways of the forest.
« Last Edit: 07 October 2007, 15:10:21 by Artimidor Federkiel » Logged

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« Reply #1 on: 15 September 2007, 03:43:36 »

First draft finally finished!
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« Reply #2 on: 16 September 2007, 10:20:51 »

Wow.  I admire your writing style.  Please put up the appropriate developement icon.
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« Reply #3 on: 18 September 2007, 03:58:33 »

Merely bumping to get some attention.  :)
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« Reply #4 on: 20 September 2007, 05:56:36 »

I can offer you a spelling/grammar check. Also, you indicate in the appearance section that tribes do have usages for the animal, but there is no "Usages" section (I know it's optional, but it might be helpful). Very nicely done.  thumbup
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« Reply #5 on: 20 September 2007, 07:30:35 »

Thanks for the compliment! A spelling/grammar check is most certainly welcome. As for a Usages section, I must have overlooked it in the template, 'cause I never saw it while I was writing this.
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Arceon Barrurbeleth
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« Reply #6 on: 22 September 2007, 05:09:35 »

Small notice:
Quote from: Gaffin
There is a myth passed among the nomads of the Santhala area...
Instead of "nomads of the Santhala area" I suggest you use Greylers or Black Butterfly Rovers (both entries availble in the People section of the Compendium).
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« Reply #7 on: 23 September 2007, 23:45:17 »

Here is that promised spelling and grammar check.

Red = Delete this.
Pink = Added.
Orange = Comments.
Purple = Altered, changed.

Beneath the eaves of the Zeiphyrian Forest, the graceful Santhalian White Hart lounges placidly in the shade. This small deer is a close cousin to the Black Hart, and scholars suggest that it is the result of crossbreeding between a doe-less buck and a Sarvonian White Deer. It is slightly larger than its black counterpart, although the poison that protects the Black Hart also courses through its own veins.

Appearance. While both species are considered beautiful in their own right, the White Hart is said to be the more graceful of the two. The average male stands a little over 2 peds, with the female about a fore shorter. Their long, gray horns curve away from their heads toward their tails, and the points are very sharp; however, as a rule they are not nearly as intricate as the Black Hart’s. The horns typically measure slightly less than a fore to as long as a fore and two palmspans.

As this is a deer, instead of horns, are these not antlers? Or do they not shed them like other deer?

Typically, the deer has keen, pale uderza blue eyes for spotting obstacles in the darkness under the thick canopy of the forest – which is necessary, because it can weave its way through the wood nearly as fast as a galloping horse and as agile as any kitten. Its coat has two layers; the top is completely white, with sleek and smooth hair woven tightly together to help protect it against some predators (it is not very effective against a determined hunting hound, of course), and to help keep its delicate body warm in the winter; its second coat is a curly mass of light gray hair – invisible under its elegant top coat, but essential to its health nonetheless – that protect it from the bites of blood-sucking insects. The White Hart’s hide is rarely used, as it is considered an ill omen, but some nomadic tribes disregard such superstitions and use the whole beast.

Special Abilities. Even those who are capable to feed on the fell meat of the beast have a terrible time tracking and hunting it, because of its incredible agility and eyesight. Indeed, few actually bother to engage in such a rigorous exercise, as it is usually fruitless anyway – and not usually worth the effort. If successfully trapped, one must be wary of its horns, which will drip poison if the animal is threatened, and even a small scratch on the arm will cause an intense and usually fatal illness. Some cases of Hart Poisoning have been observed, and the victims have all died in agony: a few moments after becoming inflicted, the subject will begin to get drowsy. A minute or so later, they will be almost completely paralyzed, and will start writhing and convulsing. If they are paralyzed, how are they writhing in agony? I think I understand that you mean that voluntary movement ceases, but the poison causes muscle spasms...but it doesn't read that way. Usually, the subject vomits a tacky, sticky substance several times during this – and will die either of a failure of the heart, or by drowning in their own bile.

This same poison is also present in the meat of the deer, and will cause similar effects to most subjects. However, some nomadic tribes of humans are reputed to be able to consume it without trouble, as are some species of hounds, such as the Ashmarian Wolf.

Territory. The White Hart is usually found in the mid-southern area of the Sarvonian continent – namely, the province of Santhala, within the twin Zeiphyrian Forests and the Auturian Woods. Flushes, or groups of deer, are also sometimes found farther north, around the Tandalian Highlands. For the most part, though, it prefers the shade of deep forests.

Habit/Behavior. The Hart is not usually found away from its flush, which is usually smaller than that of the Black Hart – typically two to four individuals, with some of the larger groups containing half a dozen deer. Like its cousin, however, men fear lone White Harts; unlike the Black Hart, though, it is usually only chased from the area, and not killed and burned. The average day consists of the deer grazing in early morning out on the vast fields and plains full of Alth'ho Grass, then spending the day lounging around water holes, rivers, or deep in the shade of the trees. They stay hidden until early dusk, when the deer emerge again for the final feeding of the day, after which they hide again to sleep.

Diet. The main food source for the White Hart is Alth'ho Grass, which grows abundantly in its territory. But this Hart will eat anything that grows, including Krakenweed and the leaves of the Adlemir Tree. The White Hart is also known to eat many poisonous plants that dwell in the area. While these plants can kill most other creatures, this deer’s stomach lining is thought to be much thicker than most animals’ or people’s. This is why the deer thrives on the poison, even though the poison leaves the stomach and flows throughout the deer's body and into the tips of the antlers and the ends of the hair.

Mating. Does from the flushes usually give birth twice a year, once in spring and once in fall. Males are ready to mate when they sense the females are in heat, which they can smell from a long distance. Unusually, male White Harts are reputed to stay with their does for a lifetime, something very uncommon among animals. During the mating season, couples set off on their own to reproduce, and flushes are remade a few weeks later.

Myth/Lore. The deer is said to be the result of the crossbreeding between the Black Hart and the Sarvonian White Deer. There is a myth passed among the nomads of the Santhala area that attempts to explain this:

When the God of the Hunt, Arvins, observed what was happening to the Black Hart, he was filled with sorrow; for he considered it to be the fairest of all game, and shed a tear for them. They were meant to be a beautiful, graceful, peaceful breed, but they were not at all. They lived their lives in bloodshed and greed. The bucks of the species wanted all the does they could handle, and more than they could, which made for fierce possession battles, and a lethal competition that raged on daily. So Arvins, with a broken heart, drew from the earth a vile poison, and implanted it into the very heart of the deer, where it spread throughout the entire body, until it reached the tips of the horns.

There was one very wretched deer in particular that stalked the forests in loneliness, searching in vain for a doe that would have him. He was sorrowful and tired, for he had been looking for a decade, eating when he was hungry and drinking when he thirsted for it; but he was always walking, always looking, always on the move from one place to another – and he did not want this anymore, for he was weary.

One night in the middle of winter, he bent over an icy stream to fill his parched throat. His fur was mottled and torn in places, and he was panting in exhaustion and his feet were throbbing from walking all day. He bent too far in his desire for water, and he fell into the stream with a cry. Its pace quickened and violently carried him off. He could not make his way onto the bank, as hard as he fought – he was tossed and turned, and he was freezing. The stream bore him far.

He awoke hours later on the bank of that same stream. He was in a strange forest, and could tell that it wasn’t his; it smelled different, and the trees were shorter. It was still nighttime and dark. He was despaired, because he was lost and cold and frightened. Out of the darkness came a pale glowing figure, graceful and elegant, and she told him not to be afraid. He followed her back to her home, and she fed him and showed him the ways of her forest. Soon he was comfortable with the forest, and they lounged together and ate the grass together, and they loved each other very much. One icy, winter night, the beautiful doe bore thirteen children, who had the horns of their father – but they were white and beautiful like their mother. The Black Hart died in delight, alongside his doe – and the children lounged together amiably in the grass and learned the ways of the forest.



I think I got everything. I'd still suggest adding a usages section. Also, I'd suggest adding in a few Santharian colours (I used an example up there for the eyes  ;) ).
However, I like the imagery I can see in this entry - it's descriptive and easy to see with the mind's eye. Nice, very nice.
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« Reply #8 on: 23 September 2007, 23:49:15 »

Thankee Sai! I'll get to adding in those comments, and add a usages section. This weekend I've been a little busy so I haven't had much time for Santharia.
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« Reply #9 on: 24 September 2007, 00:55:31 »

Quote
This small deer is a close cousin to the Black Hart, and scholars suggest that it is the result of crossbreeding between a doe-less buck and a Sarvonian White Deer.

-I don't know how this works in Caelereth but on Earth, when two species mate they give an infertile offspring(Donkey+Horse=Mule), so we need to clear this up here... 

Quote
When the God of the Hunt, Arvins, observed what was happening to the Black Hart...

-you'll have to write what exactly happened to the Black Hart for someone who had not read the Black Hart entry would not understand what are you talking about...
« Last Edit: 24 September 2007, 01:03:52 by Arceon Barrurbeleth » Logged

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« Reply #10 on: 24 September 2007, 08:21:47 »

-you'll have to write what exactly happened to the Black Hart for someone who had not read the Black Hart entry would not understand what are you talking about...

That quote comes directly from the Black Hart entry.

-I don't know how this works in Caelereth but on Earth, when two species mate they give an infertile offspring(Donkey+Horse=Mule), so we need to clear this up here...

I've said it before, I am not an expert in anything I write about, and so if you could be more specific maybe some changes could be made. However, I don't think any major ones are necessary; nobody else has had any problems with this.
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« Reply #11 on: 25 September 2007, 01:20:53 »

What you should do is check other similar beast entries. If you find that two speciments of different spicies give a feritle offspring you don't have to change anything here. As for my opinion I would like for this to be as it is because it gives a genetic uniqueness to Caelereth.

Quote
That quote comes directly from the Black Hart entry.
Sorry about that, I didn't read the rest of Myth/Lore.
« Last Edit: 25 September 2007, 05:43:42 by Arceon Barrurbeleth » Logged

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« Reply #12 on: 25 September 2007, 01:35:39 »

do earth genetic rules HAVE to be strictly adhered to in all cases?  This could be an anomoly, even here, i should think....

Nice entry....... grin
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« Reply #13 on: 28 September 2007, 04:55:24 »

Ok, read the entry, Gaffin - some comments:

- How about elves? As these harts live in large elven woods: Can they eat the meat? Or is it poisonous for them as well?

- Some corrections regarding the territory: The central province where the capital New-Santhala is located is called "Sanguia", not "Santhala". The Auturian Woods you mention as well are also practically completely in the Manthrian province, not in Sanguia.

- Oh, just a general note, not directed at you only, Gaffin: Try to avoid excessive use of the word "usually"... Some entry writers seem to have a liking for that word for whatever reason. There are other words you can use to express what you want to say like "commonly", "often", "mostly", "in general" etc. That way we can avoid sentences like

Quote
"The Hart is not usually found away from its flush, which is usually smaller than that of the Black Hart."

As I said: Only a small example here, but this happens so often that I'd like to make petition here to give other words a chance as well :)

- You mention "nomads of the Santhala area", but I'm not sure to what your refer specifically. Do you mean Eyelians travelling around in general? Or was it a rather unspecifc statement?

- Short note as well on God-related myths (though this one is only partly a God myth): As our myths on Gods increase more and more maybe we should collect them properly somewhere? E.g. in the Gods entries themselves, linking directly to the subentries. I worry a bit about too many God related stories and at the moment we don't really keep track on them.

Another great entry, Gaffin! Whatever you touch, you've got the hand for it and know how to write entries where everything fits! computer Once more a really nice job!  pet
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« Reply #14 on: 28 September 2007, 06:04:55 »

Gaffin, you have a great way of describing things. Your choice of adjectives, the poetic way you form the sentences - very enjoyable to read!
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