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Author Topic: Queprur's Blight  (Read 4821 times)
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Alysse the Likely
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« Reply #45 on: 22 January 2009, 03:05:51 »

Okay, one more check, comments in orange


Name: Queprur’s Blight. [Lethal Pulchritude, given by yours truly. (put your actual name in here.  "Yours truly" is not appropriately formal for a Compendium entry). The elves call the plant "Ishím Aváth". This name literally translates to mean "Deceitful Beauty."]

Overview: These beautiful flowers are not only pleasant to look at, they serve quite a few other purposes as well. The vine can be woven into a very strong rope. The petals can be used as a hallucinogenic drug or be made into a dreadfully lethal poison. Only with great familiarity and much experimentation could one find the darker purposes of this flower. Thin petals of a hypnotic, nearly obsidian hue grow from a broad-leafed green vine. One can catch a glimpse of these gorgeous plants in nearly any temperate climate.

Appearance: These plants are famed widely for their colour, a deep purplish midnight blue that is almost black. These treacherous beauties possess five petals of this odd color. There are eleven snow-white stamens and a single pistil the color of fresh-flowing blood growing from the center of each flower. The flowers tend to grow in clusters of five to eight on a vivid green vine. Each flower contains five leaves attached to it. The broad petals flourish outward and up, almost like a near black campfire. The flowers never measure more than one and a quarter palmspans across. Quite frequently the plants grow so closely together that their vines become intertwined, choking out other plants from lack of sunshine and water. These vicious violets can cover an area of near fifteen peds square. The vines have a tendency to grow across the ground, though climbing is not unheard of. When the vines do climb, they rarely survive as there is no way for them to nourish themselves. The vine is about as thick as three human fingers around and grows to a length of almost six and one half peds.

The main roots grow deep into the ground and the secondary roots look like short hooks of wood. Each of the roots is only about four nailsbreadths long. They come from the bottom of the vine, from one end to the other and dig into the earth. The plants absorb water through the root and run it the length of the vine. This, combining with the light of the sun, allows them to make their own food just like most other plants on Caelereth. The secondary roots anchor the vine into the soil.

Territory: These lethal lovelies grow only in very favourable temperate climates where the winters aren't too harsh. They mostly grow in forests all over Southern Sarvonia. Their boundaries are the Celeste Lowlands for the north, Ancythrian Sea for the east, Salsair for the west and Marcogg for the south. In the wintertime, the flowers close and shrink into a bulb shape the size of seven nailsbreadths round and curl up into the vine. These deadly graces are sometimes raised in gardens for their looks; the happy green-thumbs being unaware that the plant is a capable poison and highly addictive drug.

Usages: The flower can be made into a vile poison that the Kasumarii have favoured for generations. It is also used by many necromancers in the practice of their depraved craft. The well-earned nickname of this concoction is “Void Liquid” as it can cause death to a target in mere minutes. The assassin coats their chosen weapon in this poison, and then uses it on unsuspecting targets that become mere pawns in death’s little game. The poison works by attacking the target’s muscles and sending them into agonizing convulsions. The body tenses up and becomes a cage of agony. Breathing then becomes laboured, blood flow slows, and then death finally comes for the victim only minutes later.

The result of these wounds is not always death; mild poisonings can result in a horrible sickness that lasts for days. Severe nausea, burning pain in the muscles, and blurred vision are the most common symptoms. This state of illness is commonly called Death's Grip Flu. There is no known antidote. (So people just recover on their own?  Healers should be able to alleviate the worst of the symptoms with pain-killers, etc., so I'd mention that.  Mayb you could cross reference another plant, such as the Canelvous herb.)

The process for producing this grotesque poison is a closely guarded secret among the Kasumarii and necromancers. The Kasumarii tribe has used this poison for countless years in their practices of assassination. It has also been given a degree of praise among necromancers, being whispered across the lips and to the ears from one magus to another for many decades.

The flower can also be picked, allowed to dry and smoked in a pipe. It is sometimes mixed with regular pipeweeds, though most prefer to smoke it alone to fully enjoy the satisfying taste. When this is done, it clears one’s thoughts, enhances the senses and induces a state of euphoria. Usually only one petal is needed to achieve this effect, however, more experienced users require more of the flower to get this feeling. The smoking of these flowers can occasionally induce hallucinations. This use of the plant is famed amongst scholars for the effect of mind clearing so they can focus on their tasks at hand. Many mages also put it in their pipes to help them think more clearly for casting and researching spells and reagents. However, use of it this way can very rapidly cause addiction. Should an addict refrain from its use for more than a week, they will find themselves unable to focus clearly for just about a month. Severe headaches, chills and the shakes are also common side effects. On more rare occasions, temporary insanity can occur, as well as the inability to sleep. After the same amount of time, the addict returns to normal.

One can take the vine and weave it with care into a rope of great strength. The rope is ten times stronger than normal rope at only one quarter of the thickness. It is not only durable but flexible as well allowing it to be made into bowstrings. It is also highly revered in shipyards for loading heavy cargo, and as rigging. Many a farmer uses this rope to tie his or her horses to a wagon to help with plowing fields. It can also be used for grappling hooks in siege warfare should the need arise.

Reproduction: Queprur’s Blight flowers have one of the oddest forms of reproduction ever documented, as they rely solely on death to spread the vines. Many types of birds eat the stamen and pistil parts of the flower because of its alluring scent, thereby getting the seeds pollinated in their system. Their body is unable to digest the fermented seeds and the plant begins to grow inside the bird. Finally, the infant vine bursts out of the bird, killing it. This process is how this unique flower gained its devious name. The most common birds killed by this plant are Aelirel birds. They catch a whiff while hunting, are lured to the plant and indulge. Since the flowers taste sweetly to them, the birds suspect nothing.

Myth/Lore: The main myth that surrounds this plant is that Queprur herself planted the very first vine to strangle out other plants and serve her fatal purposes. From this first vine, many grew all around the disc of Caelereth and began to do the work of the death goddess.


Looking good, Lorek!  I'd like to see you expand on the myth section a little, maybe invent a proverb that goes with it, like "Ye'll be smoking Queprur's Blight, then?"  as a sarcastic comment to someone bragging about future glories they plan to attain.  But this entry has shaped up pretty nicely.  I've only made a few minor corrections, and Mira may have other suggestions, but it shouldn't take long to get the blarrow on this one.

Alysse
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Alysse the Likely
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« Reply #46 on: 23 January 2009, 21:56:08 »

All comments integrated. Ready for Mira's look over.
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Alysse the Likely
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« Reply #47 on: 28 January 2009, 18:46:18 »

Bump!
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Alysse the Likely
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« Reply #48 on: 03 February 2009, 23:19:20 »

First off, from now on i require you to colour any changes to make after receiving comments, to make it easier for others to comment again.

Categorization: Vines

Name: Queprur’s Blight. [Lethal Pulchritude, given by Sir Lorek Sarnif. The elves call the plant "Ishím Aváth". This name literally translates to mean "Deceitful Beauty."]

Overview: These beautiful flowers are not only pleasant to look at, they serve quite a few other purposes as well. The vine can be woven into a very strong rope. The petals can be used as a hallucinogenic drug or be made into a dreadfully lethal poison. Only with great familiarity and much experimentation could one find the darker purposes of this flower. Thin petals of a hypnotic, nearly nor'sidian hue grow from a broad-leafed green vine. One can catch a glimpse of these gorgeous plants in nearly any temperate climate.

Appearance: These plants are famed widely for their colour, a deep purplish midnight blue that is almost black. These treacherous beauties possess five petals of this odd color. There are eleven snow-white stamens and a single pistil the color of fresh-flowing blood growing from the center of each flower. The flowers tend to grow in clusters of five to eight on a vivid green vine. Each flower posesses five leaves attached to it The flower has leaves attached to it? Or did you mean petals? or perhaps the word flower should read stem, or vine, instead?. The broad petals flourish outward and up, almost like a near-black campfire. The flowers never measure more than one and a quarter palmspans across. Quite frequently the plants grow so closely together that their vines become intertwined, choking out other plants from lack of sunshine and water. These vicious violets can cover an area of near fifteen peds square. The vines have a tendency to grow across the ground, though climbing is not unheard of. When the vines do climb, they rarely survive as there is no way for them to nourish themselves Well, ivy for instance can climb and draw enough nutrients form their roots down below to survive thrity feet up in a tree... The vine is about as thick as three human fingers around and grows to a length of almost six and one half peds.

The main roots grow deep into the ground and the secondary roots look like short hooks of wood. Each of the roots is only about four nailsbreadths long. They come from the bottom of the vine, from one end to the other and dig into the earth. The plants absorb water through the root and run it the length of the vine. This, combining with the light of the sun allows them to make their own food just like most other plants on Caelereth. Caelerethians do not know about photosynthesis. We know that roots probably give food from the ground to the plant, but not that the sun is providing energy as well.The secondary roots anchor the vine into the soil.

Territory: These lethal lovelies grow only in very favourable temperate climates where the winters aren't too harsh. They mostly grow in forests all over Southern Sarvonia. Their boundaries are the Celeste Lowlands for the north, Ancythrian Sea for the east, Salsair for the west and Marcogg for the south. In the wintertime, the flowers close and shrink into a bulb shape the size of seven nailsbreadths round and curl up into the vine. These deadly graces are sometimes raised in gardens for their looks; the happy green-thumbs being unaware that the plant is a capable poison and highly addictive drug. Or are we? Never underestimate the gardeners! evil

Usages: The flower can be made into a vile poison that the Kasumarii interresting, since the flower doesn't grow on Cyhalloi.... have favoured for generations. It is also used by many necromancers in the practice of their depraved craft. The well-earned nickname of this concoction is “Void Liquid” as it can cause death to a target in mere minutes. The assassin coats their chosen weapon in this poison, and then uses it on unsuspecting targets that become mere pawns in death’s little game your otherwise funny metaphors do get a bit of a stretch here.. Death's game doesn't realy remind me of dieing. . The poison works by attacking the target’s muscles and sending them into agonizing convulsions. The body tenses up and becomes a cage of agony second usage of agony. suggest Suffering instead.. Breathing then becomes laboured, blood flow slows, and then death finally comes for the victim only minutes later finally and only cancel eachother out in this sentence..

The result of these wounds is not always death; mild poisonings can result in a horrible sickness that lasts for days. Severe nausea, burning pain in the muscles, and blurred vision are the most common symptoms. This state of illness is commonly called Death's Grip Influenza does not exist on Caelereth. There is no known antidote. Only mild relief is to come by way of a pain killer administered by a healer. The most commonly used is one made from the Canelvous herb.

The process for producing this grotesque poison is a closely guarded secret among the Kasumarii and necromancers. The Kasumarii tribe has used this poison for countless years in their practices of assassination. It has also been given a degree of praise among necromancers, being whispered across the lips and to the ears from one magus to another for many decades.

The flower can also be picked, allowed to dry and smoked in a pipe. It is sometimes mixed with regular pipeweeds, though most prefer to smoke it alone to fully enjoy the satisfying taste. When this is done, it clears one’s thoughts, enhances the senses and induces a state of euphoria. Usually only one petal is needed to achieve this effect, however, more experienced users require more of the flower to get this feeling. The smoking of these flowers can occasionally induce hallucinations. This use of the plant is famed amongst scholars for the effect of mind clearing so they can focus on their tasks at hand. Many mages also put it in their pipes to help them think more clearly for casting and researching spells and reagents. However, I will warn you now we typically do not speak in first person in our entries. that use of it this way can very rapidly cause addiction. Should an addict refrain from its use for more than a week, they will find themselves unable to focus clearly for just about a month. Severe headaches, chills and the shakes are also common side effects. On more rare occasions, temporary insanity can occur, as well as the inability to sleep. After the same amount of time, the addict returns to normal.

One can take the vine and weave it with care into a rope of great strength. The rope is ten times stronger than normal rope at only one quarter of the thickness. It is not only durable but flexible as well allowing it to be made into bowstrings. It is also highly revered in shipyards for loading heavy cargo, and as rigging. Many a farmer uses this rope to tie his or her horses to a wagon to help with plowing fields. It can also be used for grappling hooks in siege warfare should the need arise. Maybe you should add something to counterbalance the positive abilities. Why would anyone still be using normal rope if you can have this stronger, lighter, more durable, more flexible version?

Reproduction: Queprur’s Blight flowers have one of the oddest forms of reproduction yet documented, as they rely solely on death to spread the vines. Many types of birds eat the stamen and pistil parts of the flower because of its alluring scent, thereby getting the seeds pollinated in their system. Their body is unable to digest the fermented why are they fermenting? seeds and the plant begins to grow inside the bird why don't the seeds uhm.. 'exit' the bird in the usual way? Remember, bird digestion is typically less than a day for small birds, often no more than a few hours.. Finally, the infant vine bursts out of the bird, killing it. This process is how this unique flower gained its devious name. The most common birds killed by this plant are Aelirel birds. They catch a whiff while hunting, are lured to the plant and indulge. Since the flowers taste sweetly to them, the birds suspect nothing.
perhaps you could refer to the Lashardia somewhere in Repro?

Myth/Lore: The most common myth that surrounds this plant is that Queprur herself planted the very first vine to strangle out other plants and serve her fatal purposes. From this first vine, many grew and began to do the work of the death goddess.

Another far more disturbing myth is also spread rumours are spread, myths are known. about this plant. It is rumoured that if one receives a flower picked from this plant as a gift, they will die before the next dawn. This ancient tale is spread because famed assassin Veljik Liferipper gave one to each of his wives before he killed them. Not only was he a great hitman contemporary word, he was also a sadistic fiend why? seems to me he was warning them :P. This story has never been proven one way or the other, that is why they are called myths. you are not lecturing children, i think you can assume your audiance knows what a myth is.
[/quote]
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Avrah Kehabhra

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« Reply #49 on: 21 March 2009, 19:52:32 »

Bump.
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Nsikigan Ho´Tonanese Yourth
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« Reply #50 on: 22 March 2009, 00:25:08 »

Don't bump till you've integrated, or at least provide significant reasons why you shouldn't!
Nsiki :)
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« Reply #51 on: 22 March 2009, 00:29:47 »

I did it so I would remember to do it today.
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Nsikigan Ho´Tonanese Yourth
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« Reply #52 on: 22 March 2009, 02:18:02 »

Ah. Well, then, don't let me keep you ;)
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Nsikigan Yourth, Eyelian extraordinare.

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« Reply #53 on: 25 March 2009, 17:43:30 »

Finished integrating comments. Changes are minor and obvious. Ready for more suggestions/approval. Thanks to everyone who has helped with my first real attempt. I hope to one day clear up my negative reputation and fit in. Thanks, everyone. :)
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« Reply #54 on: 19 April 2009, 03:04:47 »

Hi Lorek

I'm new at this, really new, a novice really.  So, please forgive any mistakes I make in what I say.  Mostly I'll be asking questions, which will be written in green.

Categorization: Vines

Name: Queprur’s Blight. [Lethal Pulchritude, given by Sir Lorek Sarnif. The elves call the plant "Ishím Aváth". This name literally translates to mean "Deceitful Beauty."]

Overview: These beautiful flowers are not only pleasant to look at, they serve quite a few other purposes as well. The vine can be woven into a very strong rope. The petals can be used as a hallucinogenic drug or be made into a dreadfully lethal poison. Only with great familiarity and much experimentation could one find the darker purposes of this flower. Thin petals of a hypnotic, nearly nor'sidian hue grow from a broad-leafed green vine. One can catch a glimpse of these gorgeous plants in nearly any temperate climate.

Appearance: These plants are famed widely for their colour, (Colour or color?  Or doesn't it matter?  I've noticed in a few places here that color tends to be used.  Elsewhere in here you seem to be using color instead of colour)  a deep purplish midnight blue that is almost black. These treacherous beauties possess five petals of this odd color. There are eleven snow-white stamens and a single pistil the color of fresh-flowing blood growing from the center of each flower. The flowers tend to grow in clusters of five to eight on a vivid green vine. Each portion of the vine with a blooming flower contains a cluster of five leaves nearby. The broad petals flourish outward and up, almost like a near black campfire. The flowers never measure more than one and a quarter palmspans across. Quite frequently the plants grow so closely together that their vines become intertwined, choking out other plants from lack of sunshine and water. These vicious violets can cover an area of near fifteen peds square. The vines have a tendency to grow across the ground, though climbing is not unheard of. [Sentence removed.] The vine is about as thick as three human fingers around and grows to a length of almost six and one half peds.

The main roots grow deep into the ground and the secondary roots look like short hooks of wood. Each of the roots is only about four nailsbreadths long. They come from the bottom of the vine, from one end to the other and dig into the earth. [Two sentences removed.] The secondary roots anchor the vine into the soil.

Territory: These lethal lovelies grow only in very favourable Should this be favourable or favorable? temperate climates where the winters aren't too harsh. They mostly grow in forests all over Southern Sarvonia. Their boundaries are the Celeste Lowlands for the north, Ancythrian Sea for the east, Salsair for the west and Marcogg for the south. In the wintertime, the flowers close and shrink into a bulb shape the size of seven nailsbreadths round and curl up into the vine. These deadly graces are sometimes raised in gardens for their looks; the happy green-thumbs being unaware that the plant is a capable poison and highly addictive drug.

Usages: The flower can be made into a vile poison that the Kasumarii have favoured once again favoured vs favored for generations. It is also used by many necromancers in the practice of their depraved craft. The well-earned nickname of this concoction is “Void Liquid” as it can cause death to a target in mere minutes. The assassin coats their chosen weapon in this poison, and then uses it on unsuspecting targets. [Portion of this sentence removed.] The poison works by attacking the target’s muscles and sending them into agonizing convulsions. The body tenses up and becomes a cage of misery. Breathing then becomes laboured, blood flow slows, and then death comes for the victim only minutes later.  This seemed to jump from talking about assassins to necromancers and back to assassins again.  Are you using necromancers and assassins interchangeably?  If not, maybe move the bit about the assassins right to the end of the paragraph.

The result of these wounds is not always death; mild poisonings can result in a horrible sickness that lasts for days. Severe nausea, burning pain in the muscles, and blurred vision are the most common symptoms. This state of illness is commonly called Fate's Grip. There is no known antidote. Only mild relief is to come by way of a pain killer administered by a healer. The most commonly used is one made from the Canelvous herb.

The process for producing this grotesque poison is a closely guarded secret among the Kasumarii and necromancers. The Kasumarii tribe has used this poison for countless years in their practices of assassination. It has also been given a degree of praise among necromancers, being whispered across the lips and to the ears from one magus to another for many decades.

The flower can also be picked, allowed to dry and smoked in a pipe. It is sometimes mixed with regular pipeweeds, though most prefer to smoke it alone to fully enjoy the satisfying taste. When this is done, it clears one’s thoughts, enhances the senses and induces a state of euphoria. Usually only one petal is needed to achieve this effect, however, more experienced users require more of the flower to get this feeling. The smoking of these flowers can occasionally induce hallucinations. This use of the plant is famed amongst scholars for the effect of mind clearing so they can focus on their tasks at hand. Many mages also put it in their pipes to help them think more clearly for casting and researching spells and reagents. Using the flowers for this purpose can rapidly cause dependency. Should an addict refrain from its use for more than a week, they will find themselves unable to focus clearly for just about a month. Severe headaches, chills and the shakes are also common side effects. On more rare occasions, temporary insanity can occur, as well as the inability to sleep. After the same amount of time, the addict returns to normal.

One can take the vine and weave it with care into a rope of great strength. The rope is ten times stronger than normal rope at only one quarter of the thickness. It is not only durable but flexible as well allowing it to be made into bowstrings. It is also highly revered in shipyards for loading heavy cargo. Many a farmer uses this rope to tie his or her horses to a wagon to help with plowing fields. It can also be used for grappling hooks in siege warfare, should the need arise. A drawback is that in the production, the vine emits a dust that if inhaled in large enough volumes, can be lethal. The death is a slow does 'and' need to go in here? painful one that involves coughing up blood, sore throat, headaches and eye cramps. This dust is also irritating to human skin and will leave a great quantity of small red bumps that excrete pus.

Reproduction: Queprur’s Blight flowers have one of the oddest forms of reproduction ever documented, as they rely solely on death to spread the vines. Many types of birds eat the stamen and pistil parts of the flower because of its alluring scent, thereby getting the seeds pollinated in their system. Their body is unable to digest the seeds due to a waxy substance over them. Then the plant begins to grow inside the bird. Finally, the infant vine bursts out of the bird, killing it. This process is how these unique flowers gained such a devious name. The most common birds killed by this plant are Aelirel birds. They catch a whiff while hunting, are lured to the plant and indulge. Since the flowers taste sweetly to them, the birds suspect nothing. Nasty and very unique!  I like!  :D

Myth/Lore: The main myth that surrounds this plant is that Queprur herself planted the very first vine to strangle out other plants and serve her fatal purposes. From this first vine, many grew and began to do the work of the death goddess.

Another far more disturbing myth is also spread about this plant. It is rumoured rumoured or rumored? that if one receives a flower picked from this plant as a gift, they will die before the next dawn. This ancient tale is spread because famed assassin Veljik Liferipper gave one to each of his wives before he killed them. Not only was he a great contract killer, he was also a sadistic fiend. [Deleted sentence.]

That is all I've got on it ... it is looking good to me.  Great work Lorek.
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« Reply #55 on: 21 April 2009, 00:00:15 »

Some comments:

- To get comments, do comments, Lorek. I can't expect to receive comments if I don't comment on other people's works. Simple as that.

- We're using British/more ancient spelling, so it's always "ou" in cases like "favourable" or "colour". Try to follow through at the whole entry.

- Hmmm... You state that the effect of smoking this plant is mind clearing, yet it makes one addicted to it, and after a while one cannot focus anymore. And it has even more dangerous effects then. So: I assume this plant then must be forbidden in the Santharian kingdom and no sane mage would ever use, as it will eventually destroy everything he's worked for. I would assume that only those would consider using it, who want to speed up their successes in magic, like younger students, yet this eventually will lead to their destruction. Perhaps weave that in somehow.

- Basically that's an ok entry, though personally I struggle - as so often with your works - with too much death being present at your entries. This often takes away a lot of magic from an otherwise quite interesting entry. Aside from that I'd say it can be integrated.
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« Reply #56 on: 25 April 2009, 01:07:04 »

Considering this plant does not grow in Cyhalloi, I would be disinclined to say that the Kasumarii 'have used it for generations'. Remember, there are more assassins and hired killers than just the Kasumarii, especially when few Kasumarii actually leave Cyhalloi. It may be more prudent to state that it has been used by mainland assassins for centuries and was instead introduced later to the Kasumarii during the exchanges, who perhaps improved it and maybe have begun attempting to import it to Cyhalloi during the warmer summer months (though even that may still be too harsh for the plant to properly grow).


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13 May 2012, 08:12:31
and throw the key into the deepest river we can find, or the midst of one of the volcanoes
13 May 2012, 03:19:29
Then I say we lock the Unfinished Projects room.  If Arti ever gets in there.... big trouble. rolleyes
13 May 2012, 02:54:30
I'm amazed you can see the Altario projects pile considering it is dwarfed by my unfinished projects. For which I apologise.
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