Title: O Echo Post by: Rayne (Alýr) on 30 June 2005, 20:03:00 I told Arti I'd write him a sestina for the site, because I think it's teh only traditional form in which I haven't composed anything for Santharia. So I wrote one.
This was extremely difficult to write, and even though I've finished it, I'm extremely displeased with it. There are some parts that flow nicely, but others which need a lot of work. My greatest fear is that I'll have to change one of my end-words, and compose the whole poem again. This end is more likely that I'd like it to be. For those who aren't familiar with the sestina, it is (I think) an italian poetry style. It is one of the most difficult types of poetry to compose, and only the most skilled writers could do it effectively. It involves choosing 6 end-words and using them in varying order in each of the six-line stanzas, then all of the words in the last three lines (called the envoi). The inspiration for this sestina came from another that employed the echo element, though the intentions of the speaker were a little more duplicitous. Also, in the sestina I wrote (being the masochist I am) I composed it in the meter of the ballad. Maybe some of the other poets could help me work this poem a bit? O Echo O Echo, tell me how to make this maiden elf my lover. …love her What shall I give to woo her heart to love me evermore? …more But how much more before I cause her tender heart to fall? …all This I shall do, but will her heart still love me in forever? …ever What shall I do to woo my love when I go to behold her? …hold her And if she proudly turns away and heartache bids me cry? …cry If fear should seize my love and Nehtor bids her then to cry? …cry I wish to calm her fears and show I love no one above her …love her How might I comfort her, ensure her warm heart grows not colder? …hold her How will she love me if I stay to hold her evermore? …more And if I’m always by her side to cherish her forever? …ever What of her heart my I receive by coming to her call? …all How much to lose if patience in the course of time grows small? …all O, surely, for my broken heart, I’d curse my fate and cry! …cry! How long should I beweep my state if then she loved me never? …ever I need her by my side as friend, companion and as lover. …love her How much need I to cherish her to doubt me nevermore? …more So when I go to cherish her, to love her and behold her? …hold her And how might I prove to my love I’m not a stone-heart soldier? …hold her I’m nervous, though—what could I lose if I should briefly stall? …all Apart from me, in courting, tell me are there anymore? …more Alas! If I should lose her favor I should moan and cry! …cry How may I prove to her that I’m a far more faithful lover? …love her And should I promise her that I will love her to forever? …ever Will she be faithful if my life cold Queprur were to sever? …ever What shall I do when all my heart I finally have told her? …hold her My only wish, my one desire is to become her lover! …love her! Yet would he rheart be gained by always standing by her tall? …all I’d die before I’d leave her side, before I’d make her cry. …cry Yet, if by accident I did, I’d grieve forevermore …more Oh no—unless…what could I give so she might weep no more? …more I’d give my life, and hold that I will love her to forver. …ever And do you know what I would do if I did make her cry? …cry Yes! After all the tears, when all my promises I’ve told her? …hold her You know what I would give to her to make her soft heart fall? …all And yet, the most important act I shall do for my lover… …love her I’ll give her all, and hold her, cry should she cry, cherish more and love forever. Thank you, friend. Goodbye. …bye |