According to the entry they descend from Humans and Orcs. There's no mention of troll ancestry in the entry. Since the original creator of the entry isn't around anymore its probably best to just stick with what is on site as opposed to attempting to get it changed.
Also, the Gorba's live in Nybelmar which I don't believe Vesk and Ish have considered yet in their troll entries. To get the Gorba's changed you'd probably have to talk to Coren or drag Decipher, Mira, or Smith back here to find out what the plans laid out for the region are. If I remember correctly they were posted somewhere on the boards a while back and were quite through.
I think I did a poor job of explaining myself last time, Art. Let me try again.
Before 500 a.S, a large forest existed in what is now the northern Hylach Grasslands, creating an impressive natural barrier that blocked north-south transit between the Sentinels and Rimmerin’s Ring. Dourin’s grove and the Kilma Woods are all that remain of this formidable natural barrier.
The destruction of what henceforth shall be referred to as the ‘Old Kilma Woods’ was a slow process, occurring over the span of four centuries. The swelling of the population of Manthria and an increase in internal trade were the root causes of the forest’s demise. As the population of villages such as Courtford began to increase as a result of their prosperity, their people began to demand more space and wood in order to live comfortably. Slowly the Old Kilma Woods were whittled away, the wood of its trees used to build houses and its cleared area used to house growing numbers of Avennorians and their prized horses.
The reason I changed tenses is because I'm referring to different periods in time. I used the present tense in the first paragraph because I am referring to what exists in the region in the present day. Currently the Hylach Grasslands are where the Old Kilma Wood was and currently all the remain of the Old Kilma Wood are Dourin's Grove and Kilma Woods.
The second paragraph, on the other hand, refers to what was happening in 500-900 a.S. That is why I used the past tense there.
In summation, I used the two different tenses because I was referring to different points in time. Does that make more sense?
If you still wish for me to change it I will. I just personally found it confusing to have the same tense being used to refer to the present and the past.
I'm going to be picking this up again, beginning first with the Magic system. I've made a few larger additions/changes which are highlighted in red. I plan on addressing the rest of Coren/Talia's comments in the actual entry itself.
If anyone else has any suggestions for additions or concerns I'm open for suggestions/criticism.
I had fortunately already done all the research and had taken notes on what I wanted to do for the history so there wasn't much left to do. Otherwise it might have taken me much longer. I'm not exactly the speediest worker. :buck
I've incorporated all of the changes and added Azhira's Pendrowe to the Myth/Lore section.
I looked over the history section and I think that the present tense is appropriate for the first paragraph. In that paragraph I am describing what exists in Manthria now so using the past tense doesn't make sense to me. I'm not exactly sure how to change it if you still wish me to do so.
I just got back from school and have a week or so until my internship starts so I thought I'd pop in and see what was going on. Rayne's entries always interesting so I thought I'd so some light reading.
Hrm...Perhaps. I had forgotten about that. Let me see if I can find the draft that I had.
In opposition to this latter activity is Ecuá (Styrásh for "breaking", "disconnecting"), which is often viewed as the opposite of Xeuá.
There is a lot of redundancy in this sentence.
-The concept of breathing I think need to be explained a bit more. While I agree that xeua links attempt to move towards a certain state and that if certain stimuli are introduced this can switch, I don't agree with the rest of the way you phrase the concept. If a xeua link is 'naturally' ahm or soor, its not going to flick sporadically to the opposite on its own accord. It requires an additional stimulus to drive it to do so.
-I really like your descriptions of Ahm and Soor. You make the concepts very easy to understand.
be the same amount of Ahm and Soór links in a cár’áll.
I think number would be a better word here than amount.
they are difficult to know and control without a firm knowledge of the tendencies
I find the word "know" here to be a bit confusing.
-I personally don't completely agree with how you view Sphere II and III but I think its more a matter of opinion so it should be fine to post on site.
-Decide if Xeuagram is going to be 1 word or 2. You use both.
For example, If oún of the same element are made bigger and more defined than the other Oún,
random capitalization here.
Other than that looks great as always. This will be a wonderful addition to the next update
I haven't completely abandoned this. I'm still waiting for Rookie's comments, though she seems to have gone MIA. I'm also back at school now so my life has gotten infinitely more hectic. I'll probably get back to this around the holidays.