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Santhran Lysarian the Great
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Topic: Santhran Lysarian the Great (Read 22563 times)
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Ta`lia of the Seven Jewels
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #15 on:
07 February 2013, 23:27:41 »
Art, I will change my submission in one go, for I have slight problems with editing. I'll do it for now just on my comp, it is easy enough the way you do the corrections , thanks for that!
Here are the parts you need my input and for the duties I need some help.
Quote
Lysarian would not have been a good ruler, if there weren't a different side to him also. His father had become Santhran when he was just four, so he knew from childhood on, that once he would follow in the footsteps of his father and become the Santhran himself. This prospect provided him with a tremendous lot of self assurance and he was used to get, within reason, all what he wanted. His charming way helped him, so that his maids, servants and teachers never had the opportunity to really chide him, if at all, they just admonished him mildly.
His quick mind did not allow him to be stupid
and his genuine friendliness allowed him an easy way out of every unfortunate situation. ( Now that marked part of the sentence is really a bit strange, you should somehow try to rewrite that... )
His quick mind
obviated that he carried out stupid adventures
and his genuine friendliness allowed him an easy way out of every unfortunate situation.
Quote
What might have helped the Santhran to tame his temper and find back to his friendly self was his music. He played the resonance organ and when he was incensed about anything, he poured his soul into the instrument and after several hours of playing
another man left his instrument
. (Don't actually understand what you try to say here...)
he poured his soul into the instrument and after several hours of playing
he emerged calm and friendly (again).
I would need some help here, with the caption and especially with what the duties of a prince are.
Quote
213 a.S. - 219 a.S. (Caption?)
The prince returned to Santhala to assist his father in the daily duties of a Santhran,
be it the xx or the yyyy.
This was partly a hard school, interesting at times, but as often boring. What he enjoyed were journeys which often came with his tasks, the opportunity to get away from the court and to mix with ordinary folk, to meet new people, be they of noble descendants or commoners. Though Lysarian had discovered the opposite gender already in Ciosa, the following years were filled with the study of the female body (), much to the dismay of his parents. Many red-haired children were born but though several balls were held in the royal palace - at midwinter, at midsummer, to celebrate the beginning of spring or the harvest - and many young noblewomen were presented to him, Lysarian never fell in love with a special one. So his parents arranged a wedding.
Thanks!
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Artimidor Federkiel
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #16 on:
08 February 2013, 04:10:01 »
Ah, the "another man left his instrument" now becomes much clearer...
I really was wondering what was happening there, who played with whom and why does he suddenly leave?
As for:
Quote
The prince returned to Santhala to assist his father in the daily duties of a Santhran, be it the xx or the yyyy.
I'd add something like:
Quote
...be it the penning of letters to Thanes, receiving commoners, guild masters at audiences or taking care of ceremonial preparations.
As for a proper name for the not so strikingly sounding "Order of Magic" - how about something more fancy like "The Order of Magery" or maybe even better "Magecraft(e)ry" (which implies more the actual craft aspect of it as an own branch, personally like that). People working that way, "magic crafters" could get a proper name like "The Magadans" or "Magerans", something like that.
Anyway, now on with the next part, Part IV...
232 a.S.: The second of the Santhran‘s ,Long
V
oyages‘
This time the North was
Lysarian's
goal, so he left early in the year as soon as the roads were free to visit Naios, Caelum and Ximax, where he stayed for two weeks, enjoying the atmosphere of the magical city and spending a lot of time in the library. Salsair and Thyslan followed, where
the Santhran
declined the wish of Mariama of Thyslan to see his acknowledged son. Milkengrad
followed, then
Voldar, Nyermersys, Ishmarin and Astran, Holm and Acht, Jernais, Veltin, Carmalad and finally Cavthan
- it had been
a very long and tiring voyage. The hobbits of the Alianian Hills welcomed him so heartily, that he decided to stay for another two weeks, resting, sleeping, eating.
232 a.S.: The Claim of
Gravenness
Mariama of Thyslan
In time to
ruin
the midwinter festivities for the Santhran, the mother of his son, Graveness Mariama of Thyslan announced, that the child she
was
carrying was again sired by the Santhran, conceived while he stayed near Thyslan. The court was as shocked as the Santhran, who denied to have met the
G
rave
nn
ess in private.
233 a.S. Turning Star: The Birth of Myrissa of Thyslan
In the first month of the year, Grave
nn
ess Mariama of Thyslan‘ gave birth to a red-haired daughter with green eyes, Myrissa of Thyslan. Mariama‘s uncle Thyram, the
G
raven of Codáth Lake and Coram Duke of Salsair visited Santhala and spoke with the Santhran on behalf of their relative. It seemed, that they had come in vain.
233 a.S.: The Guild Laws
In the same year
when
the Santhran‘s ,Hebpeds‘ were introduced, Lysarian initiated a meeting of guild masters of all crafts which had a decent guild-system. Many followed his call to be his guest, even from towns as far away as Strata and Nyermersys. Around 500 joined to be part of an exchange about
how guild laws should be handled, as well as
guild standards and questions concerning the
apprenticeship
, a broad discussion was
initiated
and finally decided, that all guilds of a province should have its unified rules. It was not possible though, to reach that goal for the whole of the kingdom,
as the territory was too large to make complete standardisation in all aspects a practicable feat
. It
took however
only three years, until the
principal
unification was accomplished.
233 a.S. Frozen River: The Announcement of the Santhran
At the midwinter festival Lysarian announced, that he would marry Mariama of Thyslan and acknowledge her daughter as his child. That surprised the whole kingdom and rumours arose quickly, that the Santhran accepted his new wife in exchange for the support of the North of his planned introduction of the new currency.
234 a.S. Changing Winds: Marriage with Grave
nn
ess Mariama of Thyslan
The marriage was not a very happy one, as was to expect. The two settled in eventually, but no other children were born. Lysarian got to know and like his two offsprings though, which turned out to be a good thing, for his heir Lysmarin was a great help for him in pursuing his aims, once he had grown up. Myrissa was a sweet girl who twisted her father, having a weak spot for the female gender anyway, soon around her little finger.
243 a.S.: The 'Order of Magic'
C
elebrates its
T
enth
A
nniversary
To support the case of the progressing unification
of Santharian
magic
, the Santhran hosted a gathering on the occasion of the tenth jubilee, inviting the most deserved of the new members.
This was a milestone, for there the members of the new order, up to now still not too self-assured, gained new confidence.
From then on the order grew rapidly.
Soon every major town had a ,mage-tower‘,
and
teaching magic outside of Ximax was
precisely
regulated.
236 a.S. The third of the Santhran‘s ,Long voyages‘
To get to know the Southern part of his kingdom better, Santhran Lysarian left Santhala already early
in Awakening
Earth for Chylikis, visiting the huge harbour run by Varcopas‘ merchants. Varcopas itself had
donned
its prettiest dress: the spring flowers were in full bloom and added to the attractiveness of the anyway
ever present
climbers. The inhabitants greeted the
Santhran
cheerfully, the H‘rul and most of the
Council
of the Eleven welcomed him kindly. He was so impressed, that he decided to come back more often, and in fact,
he would retreat later on several times
to Varcopas, whenever his time allowed him to, especially in winter.
Uderza and Bardavos were
Lysarian's
next steps. In Bardavos he stayed in the house of the
Thane
for two weeks to rest and to enjoy the art of the town. As this was his
native town
, he felt very attached to it. What followed was a long sea voyage to Thalambath. His stay was short there, as the town and the volcano depressed him. The Royal Viseur and the Presidium were, though welcoming him as their Santhran, very reserved in contrast to the leaders of Varcopas. To see a Southern part of the famous Ráhaz-Dáth, he ventured out into the
oasis of XXYY
, located at the edge of the great saltpan. His fascination must have been deep, for it was here, that he is said to have mentioned, that he sometimes wished, the burden of being Santhran would not lie
upon
his shoulders. Had Thalambath
been
depressing, Strata was tiresome.
Lysarian
enjoyed the beautiful town, its location at the edge of the continent, its sunny harbour, but the activity and hustle
annoyed
him, the dust in the air, when
desert winds
swept through the streets and most of all, the wish of their leaders to help them to regain the ruling power in the Kingdom of Stratania again, which
then was located
in Thalambath, for the last 800 years. They granted him their acceptance of the new currency in exchange.
Back
in
Santhala, he took the long sea route east of the Southern Sarvonia continent up to Ciosa. On his way home, he visited his former wife Ithvinna and his three daughters, now nine, eight and six years old.
247 a.S.: Majida of Bardavos dies
In 247
he former Santhranna and Santhran
Lysarian's
mother
died
of old age
.
248 a.S.: Introduction of the new Currency
With a big
event the
new currency was presented, a fortune of sans, the new smallest coin, distributed throughout the town. From then on, in each
provincial
capital a new mint had to be built and basically only the
Thanes
had the right to mint, all others had to be closed. However, many of those who had
acquired
the
authorization
to mint before, like Dukes, Gravens and major towns, threatened to revolt, would this new
regulation
come into
effect. Widespread
bloodshed was looming over the country. The Santhran gave in and allowed all the dukes and gravens to run their mints until their death. The cities and towns however had to give
their right
up
immediately
, but they
received
special
trading
rights as compensation. An infringement of the new law was persecuted and punished
severely
, when repeated
even with
the death penalty.
The new currency was, despite those troubles and
constraints, a
great success. With the simplification of trade and business the growing wealth of most of the population in the whole kingdom finally convinced the majority and the new coins were accepted widely.
249 a.S.:
Divorce
from Santhranna Mariama
The Santhranna was caught red-handed with the captain of the guard Dyrath Jorus. It turned out, that the relation had already lasted for two years. Lysarian divorced Mariama and sent her to a monastry, Dyrath Jorus was discharged
dishonourably
. Mariama fled from the monastry though and joined, so rumours go, the Black Butterfly Rovers.
251 a.S.: San‘jana of Varcopas becomes the
M
istress of
L
ysarian (199 -266 a.S.)
Lysarian fell in love with San‘jana filja Ca‘tara filja Shen‘Hafa, a member of the Council of the Eleven of Varcopas. Though she returned his love, she refused to marry him. She did not want to be Santhranna and take all the responsibilities on her shoulders as would be expected from her, did not want to give up her freedom. So she became his mistress instead.
266 a.S.: San‘jana of Varcopas
Dies due to Old Age
)
Fifteen years of love
came
to an end as San‘jana
died
of a minor illness in the arms of Lysarian.
267 a.S.: Santhran Lysarian
Hammersfeld's Abdication
from the
Throne
On his 70th birthday, the 3rd in the month of Awakening Earth the Santhran abdicates after
forty
years of reign. His son Lysmarin follows him on the throne with 39 years of age.
272 a.S.: Last
Old Coins Minted
The last owner
with the right
to mint
died
, from now on only the new coins
would be
minted, which
were
,
by
now, a full success.
272 a.S.: Marriage with Asriyah Altara
Though already 75 years old, Santhran Lysarian married the Asriyah Altara, said to be a noblewoman of Aeruillin. She was only 25, but the relation seemed to have been a good one.
280 a.S.: 200 year
Anniversary
of the Fymbel Association
The Fymbel Association
existed by now of seventeen guilds, each of which oversaw a different craft. Five of the most important guilds had been the stonemasons, the woodwrights, the luthiers, the tapestry makers, and the puppeteers. In recognition of their value to the kingdom the Santhran
donated
the guild an array of houses in Santhala. Lysarian, though retired,
led
the festivities and
held
his last speech, out of admiration for an association consisting mostly of women.
287a.S.: Death of the Santhran Lysarian Hammersfeld
Santhran Lysarian Hammersfeld, though still in good health,
died
at the age of 90 from a heart attack, in his bed in the arms of his wife.
Importance
Santhran Lysarian the Great
had
been without doubt one of the most important rulers the kingdom of Santharia has seen in its history. Where Santhros the Wise had been the genitor and midwife of the Santharian kingdom, Lysarian
had
been the father who raised it. His sedulous commitment towards the unification in many
fields
, be it the guilds or the monetary system pushed the economy of the country immensely and brought not only wealth and affluence to many, but enabled the common
folk also
to lead a good life. His voyages made
him one
of the most popular rulers, as many people loved to actually see their Santhran, be it from afar and for a short time only, or once in their life. Lore soon grew around his visits and not few grandparents told their grandchildren of the time when ,our Lysarian‘ had visited the town or came through the village. Without him and the foundation of economic wealth for the next two century, Santhran Sanaerrin the Magnificent (497 a. S. - 547 a.S.) would not have been able to build his grand monuments, be it the Great Library of Santhala, the Summer Palace or any other of his worldwide famous buildings. Where those did crumble, when the disaster fell upon Santhala and the whole country 547a.S., the guilds still had their organisation, the currency was still valid and the ,order of Magic‘ tried to fight the
impending
chaos. Santhros the Wise is surely the greatest and most loved ruler the Santharian Kingdom has seen, but Lysarian the Great follows close up.
(1)
Ped: Equals the distance from King Thar’s breastbone to the tip of his middle finger with one arm outstretched, displayed on a statue which can still be seen in his
native town, Voldar.
--------------------
Ok, I'm through, and despite there was a lot to correct, it was still worth it...
There's one major thing however I have to at least mention, which is that the entry isn't entirely written in the form we usually have for people entries, see e.g. the
Thar entry
. There we have a biography part, which deals roughly with the main events, followed by the Time Table part with the exact details. Somehow the Biography part in this entry ended up in a mix of both, being super detailed, however, I won't be able to use it as a Time Table as it's mostly written with full details, and Time Tables are present tense throughout, while the Biography stuff is not. So the way we have it now in this entry, this is not ideal. Other than that it's fine, but I wish I'd spotted that problem early on.
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Ta`lia of the Seven Jewels
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #17 on:
08 February 2013, 05:35:27 »
The time table for the whole time is still missing! I just wanted to go sure, that the content is ok before starting to set all in present tense and it needs to be shortened also.
To the general form - the Shiana entry is written in the same manner and if I recall it right, I was asked to do it like this, with the dates IN the entry. Hmmm
I don't know, if I get the timetable done also till tomorrow night, for H-E is ill and I had to spent time driving and waiting for the doctor, and looking after her.
I have no problems with changing the name of the order to anything else, but maybe we should ask Mina, it was his idea.
No time to read through your corrections right now, but thanks for them!
«
Last Edit: 08 February 2013, 05:38:11 by Ta'lia of the Seven Jewels
»
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #18 on:
08 February 2013, 05:36:57 »
Time table of course can be added later, no problem there
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #19 on:
08 February 2013, 05:39:04 »
And in the time table will be more than in this entry here!
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Ta`lia of the Seven Jewels
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #20 on:
08 February 2013, 07:47:51 »
Art, the template suggests to use dates in the entry as I did. Otherwise I might not have done it this way, it is not really comfortable to think and write in a history table format.
http://www.santharia.com/dev/index.php/topic,6207.0.html
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #21 on:
08 February 2013, 18:01:12 »
Updated, nearly done! (Oasis name missing)
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #22 on:
09 February 2013, 00:21:41 »
The oasis has a name, but I think I should read through it a last time to erase errors which might still be in due to the hurry in which I edited, Art, but I don't think I will manage it today. But then it will not be ready for the Update.
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #23 on:
09 February 2013, 00:25:58 »
Well, you can still do it tomorrow. Ideally starting in the morning. If you've reached a certain point, just say that you got as far as a certain passage, and then I can at least start with preparing the upper part.
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #24 on:
09 February 2013, 02:23:50 »
No way, we are leaving tomorrow morning to stay with my parents for 4 days and I doubt, that I have some time to edit on Saturday night with my iPad. Chaos reigns already now, I have currently three daughters in my house.
I steal me away now and then for a few minutes to check my mail and clear my thoughts.
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #25 on:
09 February 2013, 03:03:09 »
Hi Talia,
Just to say that unfortunately I didn't find the time to read Lysarians biography this week, as I had hoped, and may not get to it for a while. Fortunately Arti has been on the case, and he is of course much better qualified than me, anyway. I'm sure I'll enjoy reading this, though, whether for the purpose of commenting or, if I'm too late for that, when it's on site.
Sorry I couldn't get here in time for this weekend's update.
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #26 on:
10 February 2013, 00:30:31 »
The name of the oasis is still missing, I will add it later today. I hope I caught all errors and replaced all 'magic' with 'magecraft'.
Edit: 2013-02-07 10:00 MEZ
Santhran Lysarian Thaelron Dagolth the Great
Overview
Santhran Lysarian the Great (197 a.S. - 287 a.S.) was
one
of
the most influential Santhrans in the time which is now called ,The Golden Age of Kings‘. He was born as first child of Santhran Calron the Weak and his wife Majida of Bardavos. With the age of thirty he ascended the throne and immediately started to initiate several projects, which would establish him as one of the key figures of the still young united kingdom. The standardisation of measurements and currency, the founding of the ,Order of
Magecraft
' and the strengthening of the guilds were the basis on which the economy could flourish and wealth spread to many people.
Many saw his affection towards women as a weakness, but it brought him within reach of the more ordinary people. He was well loved, especially by the common folk, his hard decisions though often caused trouble and many nobles hated him till they died.
He is as well known as one of the best players of the resonance organ.
Appearance
If there ever were a need arisen to hid the Santhran, this would have been a very difficult task indeed. With his Erpheronian bright red hair, the green eyes of his mother and an expressive face he was recognised from afar, his tall build adding to his appearance. His hair gave him trouble all his life, as it never could be tamed to look in any way ,royal‘, be it short or long. So most of the time he is known to have worn it long, either open or in one braid on the back. Mischievous minds said, that the braid was his ,warrior‘ style, the open hair his ,lover‘ style, but as Lysarian had it open on official occasions also, this is a mere guess.
The green of his eyes was clear and deep, and many of his adversaries had to lower their eyes, when they could not stand the stare in his gaze, should they have dared to diverge in opinion. His face was not as handsome as many would expect, rather it was long and angular, though some swear it had a feminine touch. It must have been the expression of this face, its constant movement which made him so charming, not only in the eyes of women, but men also. He was tall with fairly broad shoulders, but not overly muscular. Lysarian could swing his sword and had been a good fighter in his youth, but with age he neglected training. His duties as ruler never allowed him to put too much effort in it, and so a certain softness was communicated to his admirers too. All in all, despite his shortcomings, he was a royal appearance and many of his followers had to measure up with him.
Personality
In retrospect many believe, be it the historians or the common folk, that Santhran Lysarian was a king par excellence. He was a friendly, amiable and often charming man who cared for his people, be they of noble or common parentage. He had a cheerful temper and often his spontaneous humour lightened up the atmosphere during negotiations, when everybody else thought the talks had come to a dead end.
Lysarian would not have been a good ruler, if there weren't a different side to him also. His father had become Santhran when he was just four, so he knew from childhood on, that once he would follow in the footsteps of his father and become the Santhran himself. This prospect provided him with a tremendous lot of self assurance and he was used to get, within reason, all what he wanted. His charming way helped him, so that his maids, servants and teachers never had the opportunity to really chide him, if at all, they just admonished him mildly. His quick mind obviated that he carried out stupid adventures and his genuine friendliness allowed him an easy way out of every unfortunate situation.
That changed of course, when he got older and had to take over political responsibilities, led negotiations and had to enforce royal decisions - and not everything turned out according to his liking. Suddenly the agreeable young man could be determined and resolute. That trait strengthened when he ascended the throne. Now he was a very strong-willed man at the height of his power and expected that due to his position as the Santhran everybody would fulfill his will without any opposition, be it rectified or not. Especially in the beginning of his reign it seemed that he did not want to accept others to disagree with him, rather he expected support against their own conviction due to his position as the Santhran.
Lysarian's big goal from the first day of his reign was to lead the Santharian kingdom to wealth and prosperity. He had set himself a tight schedule what he wanted to achieve and at which point in his rule, yet when nobles revolted and made his plans impossible he tried to enforce his ideas by taking away long owned rights. This should not remain the only case. Whenever inconveniences arose, he became often impatient and aggressive. Nevertheless it is reported that Lysarian never raised his voice, but many of those men who had to deal with him reported that they would have preferred him shouting at them rather than having to endure
that
piercing sharp stare from his green eyes. A member of the council once told his wife:
„Then he became upset, in a quiet way though: his brows knitted together, his full lips became small as a line and his green eyes blazed with an inner fire, he looked as dangerous as a volcano shortly before an explosion, you saw him nearly smoking - just that he never exploded. He just stood up and left the room. The negotiations were postponed for some days and after a few days a much more even-tempered Santhran returned, hiding his determination behind a charming smile.“
In his later years Lysarian was even more tempered. While as a matter of fact he stayed as strong-willed as ever, he by now he had learned to use his charm and talent for persuasion to achieve what he wanted. Even when he seemed to become impatient and cold, those who knew him well were aware, that it was only acting on behalf of his aims.
What might have helped the Santhran to tame his temper and find back to his friendly self was his music. He played the
resonance
organ
and when he was incensed about anything, he poured his soul into the instrument and after several hours of playing he emerged calm and friendly.
A description of his personality would not be complete, if it did not mention his only ,weakness‘ : women. With his friendliness, natural kindness and charm he attracted them from childhood on and as he found pleasure in being with them, he failed to see, why he should not accept their offers. When accused by his first wife of being disloyal he always argued, that his heart would be big enough for all to live in and that he never would share a bed with any other woman as long as she was be around, so she would miss nothing. And his charm worked often and mollified her.
Biography
Childhood (197a.S. - 213a.S.)
197a.S. - 201 a.S. Bardavos
With a father who was not meant to ascend the throne and with a mother who was a famous dancer and singer, Lysarian was born on the third day in the month of Awakening Earth in Bardavos and spent his first four years there until the tragic accident happened: His two uncles and his grandfather, the Santhran, died within two days and his father Calron found himself suddenly in charge of the kingdom. These first happy years had been the cause of his amiable personality and his love of the arts. Though only four, he took in the flair of the town, the music in the air, the colours changing with the sun, the easiness of life. Both parents had time to spend with him and his little sister Liorathsa.
201 a.S - 201 a.S.: Mahood Castle
The family moved to Santhala, but Lysarian and his sister spent most of their time in the royal estate Mahood Castle west of the capital, which was located about an hour long ride west of Santhala in the gently foothills of the Rimmerins Ring. Built by Santhran Dagolth as a retreat from Santhala, it was more a big manor house than a castle, though there was a wall around the spacious garden. An attached farm and woods provided the inhabitants with all they required and a nearby village was eager to help with everything the Santhran might need, be it servants or fresh brewed beer. It was still an environment which was gentle to the young boy, but now attendants looked after the child‘s manners, teachers tried to fill the young spirit with facts, ideas and visions, taught him to read and to write, geography, history and languages, swordplay and music. This was a major break in Lysarian‘s life, he missed Bardavos, but was eager to learn at the same time. The new exiting life was no compensation though for what he missed most, his parents, who had rarely any time left for their children.
207 a.S. Introduction to the Court
When he had just turned ten Lysarian was officially introduced to the court at a festival of songs and poetry his mother Majida had organised for her 30th birthday. He was enchanted by the various arts and that passion should stay with him his whole life. From then on he spent more time in Santhala, his studies became now more and more advanced.
211a.S. - 213a.S. Stay in Ciosa
As many noble youths of his age he was sent to spend two years with another family, leaving parents and his old teachers behind. Thus he spent the following two years in Ciosa, where his aunt Liorathsa lived, the Duchess of Caeytharia. The port town fascinated him. Though it was much smaller than Santhala, it breathed the air of freedom, of openness, of adventure and at the same time that of ancient secrets. In his cousin Vildrim he found a true friend, on whom he would often relie on in his later life. A poem full of melancholy written years later bears testament of the splendid time he had in these two years.
213a.S. - 227a.S. The Prince on Duty
The prince returned to Santhala to assist his father in the daily duties of a Santhran, be it the penning of letters to Thanes, receiving commoners, guild masters at audiences or taking care of ceremonial preparations. This was partly a hard school, interesting at times, but as often boring. What he enjoyed were journeys which often came with his tasks, the opportunity to get away from the court and to mix with ordinary folk, to meet new people, be they of noble descendants or commoners. Though Lysarian had discovered the opposite gender already in Ciosa, the following years were filled with the study of the female body, much to the dismay of his parents. Many red-haired children were born but though several balls were held in the royal palace - at midwinter, at midsummer, to celebrate the beginning of spring or the harvest - and though many young noblewomen were presented to him, Lysarian never fell in love with a special one. So his parents arranged a wedding.
++
+
+
219 a.S. Marriage with Veior Ithvinna Rigvildskan
Prince Lysarian was eventually married to Ithvinna Heirike Rigvildskan, only child of the Graven of the Pearl Coast, on the 27th day in the month of Sleeping Dreameress. Marrying in the month dedicated to the goddess Jeyriall was seen as favouring the future family and it had the advantage, that the cornucopia of the fields, orchards and vineyards were ready to be harvested. The celebration is said to have been one of the most splendid in Santharian history. At the suggestion of Santhranna Majida musicians and poets from the whole of the united kingdom and even Nybelmar were invited, not only to perform before the royal couple, but to entertain the whole city of Santhala also. Painters were paid to portray the newly wed couple and to sketch the events all over the town and to document that way what was intended to be one of the greatest weddings of all time.
220 - 228 a.S. : Births and Deaths
At the beginning of their marriage Jeyriall looked with favour upon the couple and three daughters were born within four years: Princess Skavinna on the 15th day of Rising Sun in the year 220 a.S., Princess Udrike on the 21th day of Fallen Leaf in the year 221 a.S., the third, Princess Hjaveig two years later on the 1st day of Turning Star in the year 223 a.S. It is said, that Santhran Lysarian learned to love his wife and that they spent many glorious weeks in Mahood Castle.
It is not known, what went wrong so that the marriage broke up in the end nevertheless. Was it, that Ithvinna, worn out after three births refused to live up to her conjugal duty for some time and her husband looked for relief elsewhere? Was it the death of their first son, prince Kijolf, who was born on the 11th day of Dead Tree 226 a.S., only to die three weeks later? We don‘t know. It might have been the pressure of duties, the turbulence and lack of time for each other which came with the enthronement of Lysarian as Santhran after the death of his father in the spring of 227 a.S.
Unfortunately their second son Leifring (18th of Burning Heavens 226 a.S.) was born dead and Ithvinna suffered greatly without the emotional support of her often absent husband. So when she learned that a noblewoman from the fief of Thyslan claimed to have given birth to a son sired by the Santhran soon after her child had died she retreated to her estates at the Pearl Coast, taking her three daughters with her. A year later, in autumn of the year 229 a.S., she divorced her husband.
27. 6. 227 a.S. Lysarian Hammersfeld's Ascension to the Throne [/b]
Although his father had suffered a sudden death, Prince Lysarian was well prepared to ascend the throne at the age of 30. Grown up in a time of plenitude, influenced by his art loving mother and with the attitude that everything he wishes to achieve will be possible to accomplish, the grandest enthronement Santharia had ever seen was prepared. The festivities last a whole month and everybody was invited. This would not have been possible without the wealth of his wife Ithvinna.
The new Santhran entered his reign with great energy and already in his first year set many things in motion, which would bear fruits only much later. Lysarian invited authorities of diverse fields of knowledge to move to Santhala and work there on different subjects, but mainly with the goal to find out how the economy of the whole kingdom could be fostered, how trading expertise could be spread and the arts stimulated. He was open to council, but once he had formed his opinion about something, he spent all his energy into pursuing his ideas.
227 a.S. The First Years
227 a.S. Frozen Rivers, The Crumbling Bridge
At the yearturn to 227 a.S. Santhran Lysarian was severely hurt on his way home from Milkengrad, when a bridge collapsed while he was crossing over with his carriage. Apart from several bruises he broke his two legs and hurt his head badly. An accompanying mage realised, that failing magic had been the cause. The bridge had not only been constructed with the help of magicians in order to speed uo the process, also its supporting capacity had been fortified via magical means instead of using only the proper craftsmanship of a stonemason. The Santhran was brought to a nearby castle, owned by the Graven of Codáth Lake, which is situated directly at the most western of the Aurelian Lakes. He stayed there for several weeks, until his severe headache ceased and he was able to travel again. Bad weather added to the prolongation of his stay. At Codáth Lake Lysarian met the niece of the castle-owner, Mariama, the daughter of the Graven of Thyslan. While being bound to his bed for several weeks, angry and frustrated to not be able to pursuit his goals, he decided, that something had to be done to prevent such accidents, soon.
228 a.S. Awakening Earth, The Meeting of Mages
Only shortly returned from his involuntary stay in the North, Santhran Lysarian initiated a meeting of Thalambathian and Ximaxian authorities, several in magic interested noblemen and representatives from the Fymbels association as well as the Mashdai Traders. He demanded, that the practising mages who travel the land or are generally working outside from Ximax found a guild which will prevent sluggish, irresponsible work like the one which caused his accident. The guild is meant to control the work of their members, set standards, oversee the teaching, furthermore ensure that magical shops are properly equipped and artifacts like talismans or amulets are verified objectively.
The attending mages however strictly declined his wishes at first, as they didn't see themselves on the same level as traders and craftsmen, which alienated the present representatives of the trades and crafts. After several weeks of discussion though an agreement was found about the founding of an 'Order of Magic'. The precise tasks of this order still had to be laid down yet, but its main goal should be to make the use of magic safer and one of the first steps was the standardisation of teaching a magical craft to guarantee a certain level, others followed.
(It is in fact quite amazing, that the present mages found a solution this quickly, the cause may have been, that they were not allowed to leave until the problem was solved and that the meals which were served got less plentiful and tasteful with every day the meeting lasted.)
228 a.S. Rising Sun, Founding of the ,Order of Magecraft‘
The ,Order of Magecraft‘ was founded on the tenth of the month under the presidency of the Santhran. The first members were ceremonially inducted, among them several high ranked Ximaxian mages, a Pryus of Thalambath and three Thalam Wizards. The first ,house of magic‘ was opened, the first school of the order established. As first headmaster, a high-ranked wind mage of Ximax, Xaron Worthwhile, is installed. His task would be for now to organise the forming of the order, to recruit members, initiate dependencies in the other provinces and big cities of Santharia.
228 a.S. Fallen Leaf, Birth of Lysmarin of Thyslan
The forced stay in the estate of the Graven of Cothán had another outcome also. Nine months later the niece of his host, Baroness Mariama of Thyslan claimed, that the healthy, red-haired son she had given birth was sired by the Santhran. Not being a timid young lady, but a woman who had studied in Ximax holding three degrees of Wind Magic, she did not hesitate to voice who the father of her son was and demanded alimony from the Santhran. Forced by political reasons Lysarian acknowledged the child as his bastard son three months later.
228 a.S.: Planning of a new Currency
One of the working groups Santhran Lysarian had initiated arrived at the conclusion, that it would immensely further the economic strength of the kingdom, if there were a common currency. The Santhran eventually decided to realize the idea. To convince the rulers of the provinces, he planned to visit every important town in Santharia.
229 a.S. The first of the Santhran‘s ,Long Voyages‘
Wanting to know his kingdom better and with the goal to campaign for his idea to standardise the currency of Santharia, Lysarian started his first journey through his country. As he wanted to win the heart of his wife back, who was now living with their children at her home in the Manthrian Pearl Coast fief, his first journey started out South, down the Thaehelvil river and and along the coast to the elven capital Elving, where he had his first official meeting with many of the elven leaders in the region. Ravenport, Lorehaven and Griffin‘s Marl followed, till he came to Klinsor and the nearby estate of his wife Ithvinna. There he stayed for four weeks, but the rift between them could not be closed anymore, Ithvinna didn‘t want to go back to Santhala and divorced him three months later, freeing him for another marriage and maybe a legitimate son.
The Santhran continued his journey, visiting Marcogg and Chondra and then travelling up the long valley of the Mashdai, past the Almatrar and Paelelon, where he reassured himself of the support of the Ahrhim and even the Eophyrhim dark elves. Finally he reached Elsreth, the last step in his voyage for this year and then turned around to get back to Santhala, via Tyr Thromgolin (with a visit to the dwarven town). Enjoying the marvellous view at the Anaios Gap, he spent several days hunting, until he returned to Santhala late in the year.
To be able to travel this far and fast, he abstained from the comfort he was used to as a Santhran and travelled by horse. When he was not visiting the nobles and important persons he wanted to see and talk to, he slept in a well maintained inn or even in a (comfortable) tent if it was necessary. The strict organisation of his travel plans and preparation of the places he wanted to rest in advance helped a lot to achieve his ambitious goal.
230 a.S. ,Unification of the Measurements‘
While travelling through mid-Santharia "like a vagabond" some critical voices said, Lysarian had learned, that one of the problems the traders and merchants had, was, that a handspan had not necessarily the same length in Marcogg as in Elsreth and a heb was not as heavy in Ciosa as in Santhala. Though the ped was defined since King Thar (1), it did not work Santharia-wide.
So Santhran Lysarian ordered a ,standard ped and a standard heb‘ to be crafted, which were then stored in the palace of Santhala. From there the measurement was taken to create several other ,standard‘ peds and hebs, one for each provincial capital, and one for each major town. The ped was made out of Uderza pottery which had been in a very hot fire, so that its length did not change with the weather, be it cold or hot. The heb was out of an alloy whose composition was not revealed so that forgery was not possible. The single ped and heb which were kept in Santhala were soon named the ,Santhran‘s Ped and Heb' or - short - the 'Hebped'.
The other reference peds and hebs had to be kept at the seat of the provincial government, later they were transferred to the new founded mints.
232 a.S.: The second of the Santhran‘s ,Long Voyages‘
This time the North was Lysarian's goal, so he left early in the year as soon as the roads were free to visit Naios, Caelum and Ximax, where he stayed for two weeks, enjoying the atmosphere of the magical city and spending a lot of time in the library. Salsair and Thyslan followed, where the Santhran declined the wish of Mariama of Thyslan to see his acknowledged son. Milkengrad followed, then Voldar, Nyermersys, Ishmarin and Astran, Holm and Acht, Jernais, Veltin, Carmalad and finally Cavthan - it had been a very long and tiring voyage. The hobbits of the Alianian Hills welcomed him so heartily, that he decided to stay for another two weeks, resting, sleeping, eating.
232 a.S.: The Claim of Gravenness Mariama of Thyslan‘
In time to ruin the midwinter festivities for the Santhran, the mother of his son, Graveness Mariama of Thyslan announced, that the child she was carrying was again sired by the Santhran, conceived while he stayed near Thyslan. The court was as shocked as the Santhran, who denied to have met the Gravenness in private.
233 a.S. Turning Star: The Birth of Myrissa of Thyslan
In the first month of the year, Gravenness Mariama of Thyslan‘ gave birth to a red-haired daughter with green eyes, Myrissa of Thyslan. Mariama‘s uncle Thyram, the Graven of Codáth Lake and Coram Duke of Salsair visited Santhala and spoke with the Santhran on behalf of their relative. It seemed, that they had come in vain.
233 a.S.: The Guild Laws
In the same year when the Santhran‘s ,Hebpeds‘ were introduced, Lysarian initiated a meeting of guild masters of all crafts which had a decent guild-system. Many followed his call to be his guest, even from towns as far away as Strata and Nyermersys. Around 500 joined to be part of an exchange about how guild laws should be handled, as well as guild standards and questions concerning the apprenticeship, a broad discussion was initiated and finally decided, that all guilds of a province should have its unified rules. It was not possible though, to reach that goal for the whole of the kingdom, as the territory was too large to make complete standardisation in all aspects a practicable feat. It took however only three years, until the principal unification was accomplished.
233 a.S. Frozen River: The Announcement of the Santhran
At the midwinter festival Lysarian announced, that he would marry Mariama of Thyslan and acknowledge her daughter as his child. That surprised the whole kingdom and rumours arose quickly, that the Santhran accepted his new wife in exchange for the support of the North of his planned introduction of the new currency.
234 a.S. Changing Winds: Marriage with Gravenness Mariama of Thyslan
The marriage was not a very happy one, as was to expect. The two settled in eventually, but no other children were born. Lysarian got to know and like his two offsprings though, which turned out to be a good thing, for his heir Lysmarin was a great help for him in pursuing his aims, once he had grown up. Myrissa was a sweet girl who twisted her father, having a weak spot for the female gender anyway, soon around her little finger.
243 a.S.: The 'Order of Magecraft' Celebrates its Tenth Anniversary
To support the case of the progressing unification of Santharian magic, the Santhran hosted a gathering on the occasion of the tenth jubilee, inviting the most deserved of the new members. This was a milestone, for there the members of the new order, up to now still not too self-assured, gained new confidence. From then on the order grew rapidly. Soon every major town had a ,mage-tower‘, and teaching magic outside of Ximax was precisely regulated.
236 a.S. The third of the Santhran‘s ,Long voyages‘
To get to know the Southern part of his kingdom better, Santhran Lysarian left Santhala already early in Awakening Earth for Chylikis, visiting the huge harbour run by Varcopas‘ merchants. Varcopas itself had donned its prettiest dress: the spring flowers were in full bloom and added to the attractiveness of the anyway ever present climbers. The inhabitants greeted the Santhran cheerfully, the H‘rul and most of the Council of the Eleven welcomed him kindly. He was so impressed, that he decided to come back more often, and in fact, he would retreat later on several times to Varcopas, whenever his time allowed him to, especially in winter.
Uderza and Bardavos were Lysarian's next steps. In Bardavos he stayed in the house of the Thane for two weeks to rest and to enjoy the art of the town. As this was his native town, he felt very attached to it. What followed was a long sea voyage to Thalambath. His stay was short there, as the town and the volcano depressed him. The Royal Viseur and the Presidium were, though welcoming him as their Santhran, very reserved in contrast to the leaders of Varcopas. To see a Southern part of the famous Ráhaz-Dáth, he ventured out into the oasis of Na'la Na'tifa, located at the edge of the great saltpan. His fascination must have been deep, for it was here, that he is said to have mentioned, that he sometimes wished, the burden of being Santhran would not lie upon his shoulders. Had Thalambath been depressing, Strata was tiresome. Lysarian enjoyed the beautiful town, its location at the edge of the continent, its sunny harbour, but the activity and hustle annoyedhim, the dust in the air, when desert winds swept through the streets and most of all, the wish of their leaders to help them to regain the ruling power in the Kingdom of Stratania again, which then was located in Thalambath, for the last 800 years. They granted him their acceptance of the new currency in exchange.
247 a.S.: Majida of Bardavos dies
In 247 the former Santhranna and Santhran Lysarian's mother died of old age.
248 a.S.: Introduction of the new Currency
With a big event the new currency was presented, a fortune of sans, the new smallest coin, distributed throughout the town. From then on, in each provincial capital a new mint had to be built and basically only the Thanes had the right to mint, all others had to be closed. However, many of those who had acquired the authorization to mint before, like Dukes, Gravens and major towns, threatened to revolt, would this new regulation come into effect. Widespread bloodshed was looming over the country. The Santhran gave in and allowed all the dukes and gravens to run their mints until their death. The cities and towns however had to give their right up immediately, but they received special trading rights as compensation. An infringement of the new law was persecuted and punished severely, when repeated even with the death penalty.
The new currency was, despite those troubles and constraints, a great success. With the simplification of trade and business the growing wealth of most of the population in the whole kingdom finally convinced the majority and the new coins were accepted widely.
249 a.S.: Divorce from Santhranna Mariama
The Santhranna was caught red-handed with the captain of the guard Dyrath Jorus. It turned out, that the relation had already lasted for two years. Lysarian divorced Mariama and sent her to a monastry, Dyrath Jorus was dishonourably discharged. Mariama fled from the monastry though and joined, so rumours go, the Black Butterfly Rovers.
251 a.S.: San‘jana of Varcopas becomes the Mistress of Lysarian (199 -266 a.S.)
Lysarian fell in love with San‘jana filja Ca‘tara filja Shen‘Hafa, a member of the Council of the Eleven of Varcopas. Though she returned his love, she refused to marry him. She did not want to be Santhranna and take all the responsibilities on her shoulders as would be expected from her, did not want to give up her freedom. So she became his mistress instead.
266 a.S.: San‘jana of Varcopas Dies
Fifteen years of love came to an end as San‘jana died, due to old age, of a minor illness in the arms of Lysarian.
267 a.S.: Santhran Lysarian Hammersfeld Santhran Lysarian Hammersfeld's Abdication from the Throne
On his 70th birthday, the 3rd in the month of Awakening Earth the Santhran abdicates after forty years of reign. His son Lysmarin follows him on the throne with 39 years of age.
272 a.S.: Last Old Coins Minted.
The last owner with the right to mint died, from now on only the new coins would be minted, which were, by now, a full success.
272 a.S.: Marriage with Asriyah Altara
Though already 75 years old, Santhran Lysarian married the Asriyah Altara, said to be a noblewoman of Aeruillin. She was only 25, but the relation seemed to have been a good one.
280 a.S.: 200 year Anniversary of the Fymbel Association
The Fymbel Association existed by now of seventeen guilds, each of which oversaw a different craft. Five of the most important guilds had been the stonemasons, the woodwrights, the luthiers, the tapestry makers, and the puppeteers. In recognition of their value to the kingdom the Santhran donated the guild an array of houses in Santhala. Lysarian, though retired, led the festivities and held his last speech, out of admiration for an association consisting mostly of women.
287a.S.: Death of the Santhran Lysarian Hammersfeld
Santhran Lysarian Hammersfeld, though still in good health, died at the age of 90 from a heart attack, in his bed in the arms of his wife.
Importance
Santhran Lysarian the Great had been without doubt one of the most important rulers the kingdom of Santharia has seen in its history. Where Santhros the Wise had been the genitor and midwife of the Santharian kingdom, Lysarian had been the father who raised it. His sedulous commitment towards the unification in many fields, be it the guilds or the monetary system pushed the economy of the country immensely and brought not only wealth and affluence to many, but enabled the common folk also to lead a good life. His voyages made him one of the most popular rulers, as many people loved to actually see their Santhran, be it from afar and for a short time only, or once in their life. Lore soon grew around his visits and not few grandparents told their grandchildren of the time when ,our Lysarian‘ had visited the town or came through the village. Without him and the foundation of economic wealth for the next two century, Santhran Sanaerrin the Magnificent (497 a. S. - 547 a.S.) would not have been able to build his grand monuments, be it the Great Library of Santhala, the Summer Palace or any other of his worldwide famous buildings. Where those did crumble, when the disaster fell upon Santhala and the whole country 547a.S., the guilds still had their organisation, the currency was still valid and the ,order of Magic‘ tried to fight the impending chaos. Santhros the Wise is surely the greatest and most loved ruler the Santharian Kingdom has seen, but Lysarian the Great follows close up.
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--> last wife
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Ithvinna, as long as nobody else want to use it for a person‘s entry
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"For me there is only the traveling on paths that have heart, on any path that may have heart. There I travel, and the only worthwhile challenge is to traverse its full length. And there I travel looking, breathlessly. ~Don Juan"
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Shabakuk Zeborius Anfang
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #27 on:
10 February 2013, 01:58:26 »
Hi Talia,
I had a close-ish look at the first few sections, up to and including 'Personality'. It's a lovely description throughout, creating a subtle and colourful portrait of the man. I hope my comments are helpful. Yellow is for corrections (necessary in my opinion), orange is for suggestions. I have used the version in the post immediately above this one.
Edit: 2013-02-07 10:00 MEZ
Santhran Lysarian Thaelron Dagolth the Great
Overview
Santhran Lysarian the Great (197 a.S. - 287 a.S.) was one of the most influential Santhrans in the time which is now called ,The Golden Age of Kings‘. He was born as first child of Santhran Calron the Weak and his wife Majida of Bardavos.
At
the age of thirty he ascended the throne and immediately started to initiate several projects, which would establish him as one of the key figures of the still young united kingdom. The standardisation of measurements and currency, the founding of the ,Order of Magecraft' and the strengthening of the guilds were the basis on which the economy could flourish and wealth spread to many people.
Many saw his affection towards women as a weakness, but it brought him within reach of the more ordinary people.
(That’s a splendidly brazen rationalization for sleeping your way through the beds of Santharia!)
He was well loved, especially by the common folk
(Cough, cough!)
,
although
his hard decisions though often caused trouble
(… although his uncompromising stance often caused controversy among the aristocracy …)
and many nobles hated him till they died.
He is
as
well known
(famous)
as one of the best players of the resonance organ.
Appearance
If there had ever arisen the need to hide Santhran Lysarian
, this would have been a very difficult
(formidable)
task indeed. With his Erpheronian bright red hair, the green eyes of his mother and an expressive face he was recognised from afar, his tall build adding to his appearance. His hair gave him trouble all his life, as it never could be tamed to look in any way ,royal‘, be it short or long. So most of the time he is known to have worn it long, either open or in one braid on the back. Mischievous minds said
(no comma)
that the braid was his ,warrior‘ style, the open hair his ,lover‘ style, but as Lysarian had it open on official occasions also, this is a mere guess.
The green of his eyes was clear and deep, and many of his adversaries had to lower their eyes, when
(as)
they could not stand the stare in his gaze, should they have dared to diverge in opinion. His face was not as handsome as many would expect, rather it was long and angular, though some swear it had a feminine touch. It must have been the expression of this face, its constant movement which made him so charming, not only in the eyes of women, but men also. He was tall with fairly broad shoulders, but not overly muscular. Lysarian could swing his sword and had been a good fighter in his youth, but with age he neglected training. His duties as ruler never allowed him to put too much effort in it, and so a certain softness was communicated to his admirers too. All in all, despite his shortcomings, he was a royal appearance and many of his followers had to measure up with him.
(I think you mean: “… and many of his heirs on the throne had to suffer being unfavourably compared to him.”, or something like that?)
Personality
In retrospect many believe, be it the historians or the common folk, that Santhran Lysarian was a king par excellence. He was a friendly, amiable and often charming man who cared for his people, be they of noble or common parentage. He had a cheerful temper and often his spontaneous humour lightened up the atmosphere during negotiations, when everybody else thought the talks had come to a dead end.
Lysarian would not have been a good ruler, if there
had not been
a different side to him also. His father had become Santhran when he was just four, so he knew from childhood on, that once he would follow in the footsteps of his father and become the Santhran himself. This prospect provided him with a tremendous lot of self assurance and he was used to get, within reason, all
that
he wanted. His charming way helped him, so that his maids, servants and teachers never had the opportunity
(… teachers could never brings themselves …)
to really chide him, if at all, they just admonished him mildly.
(… at most they would ruffle his hair and say ‘tut, tut’, while smiling at the enchanting boy.)
His quick mind obviated that he carried out stupid adventures
In any case, even as a child he was too intelligent to go on silly adventures, )
and his genuine friendliness allowed him an easy way out of every unfortunate situation.
That changed of course, when he got older and had to take over political responsibilities, led negotiations and had to enforce royal decisions - and not everything turned out according to his liking. Suddenly the agreeable young man could be determined and resolute. That trait strengthened when he ascended the throne. Now he was a very strong-willed man at the height of his power and expected that due to his position as the Santhran everybody would
fulfil
(or: “bow to”)
his will without any opposition, be it
justified
or not. Especially in the beginning of his reign it seemed that he did not want to accept others to disagree with him, rather he expected support against their own conviction due to his position as the Santhran.
Lysarian's big goal from the first day of his reign was to lead the Santharian kingdom to wealth and prosperity. He had set himself a tight schedule what he wanted to achieve and at which point in his rule, yet when nobles revolted and made his plans impossible he tried to enforce his ideas by taking away long owned rights. This should not remain the only case.
(I don’t understand the last sentence.)
Whenever inconveniences arose, he became often impatient and aggressive. Nevertheless it is reported that Lysarian never raised his voice, but many of those men who had to deal with him reported that they would have preferred him shouting at them rather than having to endure that piercing sharp stare from
(of)
his green eyes. A member of the council once told his wife:
„Then he became upset, in a quiet way though: his brows knitted together, his full lips became small as a line and his green eyes blazed with an inner fire, he looked as dangerous as a volcano shortly before an explosion, you saw him nearly smoking - just that he never exploded. He just stood up and left the room. The negotiations were postponed for some days and after a few days a much more even-tempered Santhran returned, hiding his determination behind a charming smile.“
In his later years Lysarian was even more tempered. While as a matter of fact he stayed as strong-willed as ever, he by now he had learned to use his charm and talent for persuasion to achieve what he wanted. Even when he seemed to become impatient and cold, those who knew him well were aware, that it was only acting on behalf of his aims.
What might have helped the Santhran to tame his temper and find back to his friendly self was his music. He played the resonance organ and when he was incensed about anything, he poured his soul into the instrument and after several hours of playing he emerged calm and friendly.
A description of his personality would not be complete, if it did not mention his only ,weakness‘ : women. With his friendliness, natural kindness and charm he attracted them from childhood on and as he found pleasure in being with them, he failed to see
(no comma)
why he should not accept their offers. When accused by his first wife of being disloyal he always argued
(no comma)
that his heart
was
big enough for all to live in and that he never would share a bed with any other woman
in the presence of his wife
, so she would miss nothing.
(Well, at least he’s honest. Is there any evidence concerning what he would have done had his wife claimed the same privilege?)
And his charm worked often and mollified her.
«
Last Edit: 10 February 2013, 16:48:17 by Shabakuk Zeborius Anfang
»
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Ta`lia of the Seven Jewels
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #28 on:
10 February 2013, 02:09:31 »
Shaba dear, thanks!
That's more to correct however and I can't handle that with my iPad well enough.
Art, please wait with uploading this submission, in two weeks I'll have the history table finished also and then it can go up as a whole.
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Artimidor Federkiel
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Re: Santhran Lysarian the Great
«
Reply #29 on:
10 February 2013, 16:43:45 »
Ok, will be postponed then till next update...
A note on commas as Shabakuk brings it up: There are quite a lot of commas in the whole text which I think shouldn't be there. Quite a lot actually, but I didn't point them out and focused on the other stuff. As a rule of thumb I'd say that commas can be omitted in English throughout most of the time, less is more. It's much more strict in German. For example next to a "that" an English speaking person doesn't write a comma. So if you look through the text again maybe search for these instances and you'll find quite a bunch to remove.
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