Don't go swimming with those lascivious merfolk!

Bard Judith

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Don't go swimming with those lascivious merfolk!

« on: 08 June 2013, 18:20:32 »

(And look out for the non-toilet-trained tuna, too...)

I received this email today, purporting to be from someone who had read Bard Judith's scholarly article on the Merfolk of Santharia
AND had a critique to make on my Mermaid Dissection illustration. (I'm afraid that's going to haunt me the rest of my life...)
Apparently I need to do my research more carefully and I've missed out some salient points on mer/human reproduction!
Oh, but don't let me spoil the full delightful confusion of the letter itself; it's too good not to share. Enjoy!

"Way off... contact ucdavis course on fish um anatomy.
They work here on land ref. Agilant, sun micro systems. Highly intelligent PhD.s since 1800s and earlier. Signers of us constitution.
Mer or human sperm on fish eggs, blood of human male with vasectomy on fish eggs, or female human or mer swimming thru water where male met or fish peed. All result in babies. All different. I can not go into fish water without being impregnated delivered many at Stanford.

Dragon naturally speaking was developed by and for mer. They live 800-1000 yrs or more. Have right to vote, live underground, in cities, and sea. Best future astronauts.

Take vacation to society islands.

Good luck."

N.B. Name and email removed to protect the, um, not-so-innocent (seeing as this person has apparently been impregnated by lustful mer or incontinent fish multiple times).


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Amabella Catston

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Re: Don't go swimming with those lascivious merfolk!

« Reply #1 on: 08 June 2013, 18:59:29 »

Too funny! rolling

I must be sure to add this profound wisdom to my list of reasons that dwarves do not want to enter the water. After all, who knows what bizarre human/mer creatures they could encounter...


« Last Edit: 08 June 2013, 19:34:08 by Amabella Catston »	Logged

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Artimidor Federkiel

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Re: Don't go swimming with those lascivious merfolk!

« Reply #2 on: 08 June 2013, 21:30:08 »

Ah, yes, very... erm... insightful... lol


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Bard Judith

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Re: Don't go swimming with those lascivious merfolk!

« Reply #3 on: 09 June 2013, 15:43:15 »

Great, I'm being stalked. Got another 'letter' this morning. I'd block her, but so far it's remarkably amusing. Here for your enjoyment:

"My daughter Trina the giant in society islands and her children fish farm whales. They are to release a percentage of baby whales each batch. The new babies without adult whales to teach them would not survive in the ocean. So adult mermaids travel with them teaching them the language of the sea and how to navigate, hunt and survive. They stay with them for years. Mermaids can live hundreds of years. I don't know how old whales are when grown up.

Trina is a descendant of Paul Jean Bonean (Bunyan in American) Queen Elizabeth II is her guardian. If you visit - do not enter their enclosure. Use the phone on the outer gate."