The Corrupted Wish game

[Aster]

Granted you are now fat albert then you have a heart attack and die 

I wish I could run really really really really really really (you get the picture) slow (did you expect that?)

[Kaldez’Yadra]

You can run really really really slow, however this is do to the fact that you are practically stopped in time, a second to you is like a year to everyone else. As time progresses everyone you know and love dies and the world changes around you, but you barely move at all. Have fun living an eternity in one place, or at least until someone decides to do something to you.

I wish...I wish... hm i wish i had a good wish

[Alexandre Scriabin]

Granted. You had it, but then you lost it the next second. For losing your wish, the corrupting wish machine gets frustrated and explodes in your face. After the machine puts itself back together, all that is left of you is a shoe with a pink sock in it.

I wish to know every entry in the Compendium instantaneously.

[Kaldez’Yadra]

Granted however the sheer volume of information causes your brain to much stress, in response to this overload your brain shuts down putting you into a vegetative state for the rest of your life.

I wish i had a pink sock, no a pair of pink socks!

[Alexandre Scriabin]

Granted. You get a pair of pink socks. I then hunt you down, observe you and find out where you live, where you eat, where you go to school/work, and figure out your daily schedule. I then put a worm in your beverage without you looking, dog feces in your pillow, and proceed to sabotage your entire day with random, horrible things found in your possessions, food, and drink. Once you can't stand it anymore, I reveal myself to you and say: "Why did you steal my pink socks? Those were my last pair!" You go missing and are never heard from again.

I wish for my pink socks back.

[Kaldez’Yadra]

Granted you get your pink socks back, however they have been bleached, and the ends cut off. As you stare in horror at was once your last pair of pink socks you hear my ghostly laugh.

I wish for all Santharians to have happy holidays and splendid new years

[Alexandre Scriabin]

Granted. However, everyone simultaneously quits Santharia and has a horrible couple of holidays this year! How could you, Kaldez? How could you?

I wish for the reversal of Kaldez' mean, hurtful wish!

[Markus Boadicea]

Granted, Everyone has such a wonderfully perfect vacation that they decide to say at their vacation spots where they indulge themselves until they spend their very last dime and need to spend 23.9999999 hours every day working at McDonalds that said they will never ever have time to return to Santharia.

I wish that the next peson to wish has their wish twisted into a nightmarish mockery of what it once was.

[Alexandre Scriabin]

You wished for something the corrupted wish machine already does, so the machine just sits there without responding. While waiting for a confirmation of your wish, Shingen Takeda materialized into the world of the living and performed on you what a samurai would do to himself while performing Seippuku. That is, you were disemboweled by a short sword and waited in agony to bleed out.

I wish I was a published author of a science fiction novel.

[Ridgen Sú'ufanán]

Granted, but at the same time another person launched a book with similar synopsis, name and characters, and neither of you gain any profit from it.

I wish for incredibly good fortune.

[Mallayn Galnodren]

Granted; however, because of your good fortune (and due to the butterfly effect) an innocent child in India dies.

I wish college was really expensive...


Oh wait...

[Alexandre Scriabin]

Granted. However, the corrupted wish making machine noted the angst towards young adults that you displayed by making this wish. Thus, as another factor in the proverbial "price of living" goes up, everyone but you simultaneously begins to accrue more money. Have fun working at Taco Bell.

I wish for a long term investment that won't fail to profit me at any point during my lengthy time period of holding shares (that is, I make that distinction meaning that my shares may not be suddenly and arbitrarily taken away).

[Leif Terskun]

Granted. However, money suddenly becomes worthless as people return to a feral state, and as a member of one of the few oases of civilisation, your shares do not fail you, though you live in constant fear of the beasts, and are after a week or so killed and eaten by a wild overrun. (Note that a week is seven lifetimes for a mayfly, so no matter when this happens you held shares for a relatively long time)

I wish I didn't get writers' block when trying to write romantic scenes in fictional biographies.

[Mathis Mallister]

Your wish had been granted. Sweet nothings flow from your fingers with unparalleled ease into the mouths of your characters. You (and your characters) get carried away and before you know it you have an entire romance novel. The publishers rewrite your male lead to look like Fabio so they can put him on the cover. He has a lifetime contract, after all.

I wish my infamously reclusive favorite musician who has only played four or five shows in the last ten years would finally announce a date sometime in advance so I can, you know, attend.

Oh wait, that just happened. October 3rd. Woot.

[Alexandre Scriabin]

Because you didn't specify, the corrupted wish machine doesn't know who you are talking about. Confused, it schedules you to go see this guy pound the crap out of his instrument, on October 3rd (thus you will be missing whoever it was you wanted to see):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Q_Jz895B-A

Chinese art music (in contrast with folk music) is obscure, and Liu Dehai is under-appreciated outside of relatively small circles, but I guess it's up to you whether you like it or not. And of course, you are being forced to attend the event.

I wish I had a doctorate in beer brewing, and in beer drinking.

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