Menweh Reolláolásh’miés/ Ylfferhim/ Scribe

[Menweh Reolláolásh’miés]

Menweh cracks her knuckles as she finishes her magic write up, "Alright! I finally found time to update! Thank you Azhira! I hope your week is going well!" She leans back,"Lets do this! More comments? Help me make myself better!" Menweh smiles waiting for more comments.

[Rookie Brownbark]

Wow, this has to be the first character I've ever seen who has accounting as a strength.  I love it! 

However, some things seem to be missing from here too - namely magic and weapon skills.  Are these not strengths?    On the other hand, we try and steer people away from being able to use weapons and magic at the same time.  Partly because each of these skills probably takes you all of your free time to learn, and party because it's very hard to balance them.  Personally I would completly take out the bow if you can - it's a large strength which takes a while to get good at and you're not using it very often. Even as it is you are going to need some good solid weaknesses to balance out the magic.

(Sorry, I'm not very good at magic, so I'll leave that bit for the others)

[Twén Aråerwén]

Magic: Menweh has reached her second level of spell casting. Currently she is very good at conjuring<--manipulating wind ounia to create high winds and working with the Physical Representations of the element of wind itself (in the physical aspects anyway). In those respects she is blessed with a fair amount of talent. However she is very poor at using the element of wind to befuddle or otherwise influence other's minds, so her illusions<--Spiritual Representations of that nature are very poor in quality.

Menweh has been focusing most of her first level studies into her ability to conjure<--manipulate physical winds. She has found that is is rather easy for her to strengthen the  wind ounia in the cár'áll around her (again when summoning or conjuring<--Summoning and conjuring should not be used to define this. Wind ounia are strengthened or weakened, not conjured or summoned. What the mage is working with is already there, just altered.  the physical aspects of wind). This is due her determination to be able to increase<--and decrease as high winds can be damaging to a ship. the influence of wind's properties the sails of her father's ship and her long hours of study.

Her firsts attempts at using Reflection were only so she could see the adventures and romances being played out in her mind, in front of her (a sort of enhanced day dream if you will). This of course, and rather quickly, became one of her favorite spells to waste away time with, especially times where she shouldn't be daydreaming (her classes for example). When manipulating xeuá<-- Xeua is an archmage school of magic and a wind mage has no direct control over the creation of links in the car'all. Xeua links are inadvertently created as side effects of the mages castings, not direct manipulation of them. to affect the minds of others, she tends to run into problems, this aspect of wind she is not the best at. As such she rarely even attempts mind affecting wind magic.

Vanish has been a life saver for her. She knows she can't use this spell on herself, or any living creature, but it does come in handy when she is not supposed to be holding a mirror in class to use in the aforementioned spell. When she needs to become as invisible as a vanished mirror that is another story. She has been using Hide ever since she learned of it to get anywhere she could that wasn't sealed off by magic or locked doors. In the beginning she did have some problems with Hide, and on many occasions was scolded on the improper use of magic and the respect she should she should show others when her Hide spell faltered, reveling Menweh to any passers by.

Upon attaining a second level in spell casting she began to realize that certain illusions and mind affecting did not come easily to her. On the other hand, the element of air and other types of illusions (conjure wind being the best example) come much easier to her.

Also, as Rookie mentioned the combination of weapon skills with magic is not easily balanced. Quite literally combining the two effectively is impossible and you should choose between the bow or magic.

~Sincerely~

Cáo fá cár'tuulén:Twen Araerwen

[Menweh Reolláolásh’miés]

Menweh laughs nervously, "sorry, for a moment there I was confused by the difference between xeuá and onia, thank you for pointing that out to me Twén. And thank you Rookie for pointing out to me the strengths I didn't count as strengths at all! All right! Lets go for the next thing!"

[Menweh Reolláolásh’miés]

She pauses for a moment as she remembers something, "Where exactly is the information on what the months are and secondly am I a bit young for my tribe? Should I be older and have trained longer at Ximax?"

[Twén Aråerwén]

Calendar

Your age fits perfectly into the level of training your character has in magic. No need for any adjustments there hun.

~Sincerely~

Cáo fá cár'tuulén:Twen Araerwen

[Menweh Reolláolásh’miés]

Menweh bows, "Thank you very much!" She smiles and waits for further critiques upon herself, tapping the letter-board in front of her desire to role play goes steadily up.

[Eléyr Fásamár]

Hey there Menweh! Not much left to fix.

Menweh has always been calm and collected, but not distantly so, she has always retained a cheerful and pleasent<--pleasant attitude and is always amicable to those she meets and befriends.

Too many times she has found herself have<--having to explain what she was doing after reading letters that had been left open on her father's desk or rummaging through sailor's belongings.

Menweh's curiosity has lead her into various places(i.e. Bedrooms, Summoning circles,<-- I don't think Ximaxian magic really uses these, nor can I think of another magic system with them here.  offices and the like) that she should never have been in the first place.

-Menweh's spiritual aspects of wind are horrendous. As such it takes longer to use magic on the spiritual side of wind magic. This is usually accompanied with poor results along with longer casting times.<-- Remember due to you being compared to the average peasant, this should not be in the weakness section. However, you can put it under your magic strength as a limitation to that strength. It just can't be its own weakness.

Well, I really don't think there's much left to fix, other than perhaps balance. You have training in weapons and magic, in addition to the smarts, and your current three weaknesses, with the removal of bad spiritual magic, are all minor personality quirks, which I suppose can be weaknesses, just not very big ones. In addition they seem to almost be variations of the same weakness. Anyways, perhaps a physical weakness, or something a bit more detrimental?

[Menweh Reolláolásh’miés]

She bows graciously to Eléyr, "Thank you! The only way I can think to get rid of the dagger is to start Menweh's training in magic earlier as a wind mage in her tribe. Should I do that? I just will have her beginning to learn the principles of wind magic instead?"

[Azhira Styralias]

I agree! Almost there, Menweh.  Your character is coming along nicely.

As Eleyr said, you *may* need to add a potential weakness...but honestly, in the overall scope of of your character, I don't see the need to do so. I think your weaknesses are fine and I feel that adding another one for the sake of doing so will only look tacked on and not feel right...but, another moderator will have to make that decision.

I would also define your level of magic skill as equal to a level one or two wind mage. You have talent and potential, but you can't really claim to be really good at manipulating wind ounia. That is a very general statement. So define your skill where you are currently at - level one with a bit of level two.

I also think your dagger skill will work, however, it is hard to balance a weapon skill and magic skill. Since your magic skill is so low and your dagger skills are not at the level of perhaps a trained soldier or assassin, I'd say keeping them both is fine. Some people want their CD to have expert in a dagger AND be an uber-mage and that is discouraged. You have a nice balance here, though, in my opinion. 

[Menweh Reolláolásh’miés]

Nah Menweh can only defend herself against foes, I mean she can use the dagger with some skill, she has been training in it and she was a sailor at one point, but she is now focusing in on her magical training, but she is not going to be teh uberz mage with assassin level skill. She is a leaning   mage with some sailing background. I hoped it was alright. Is it possible for her to gain knowledge and training over time?

[Azhira Styralias]

Ok Menweh...

The Powers That Be discussed this and have come up with some small issues concerning your Strengths and Weaknesses.

1. I told you that your dagger skills and magic skills were ok to have. We mods discourage this sort of mix as it is hard to balance a character with magic and weapons skills and can tend to be overpowering. So, we have to stick with that "rule". So, I want to take back what I approved of and ask that you remove your dagger skills completely. Twen made a note for you to remove your bow skills so as a result, any other weapon skills need removed to.

2. As Eleyr mentioned, the Powers decided that you will indeed need another weakness or two. You have three very strong strengths - language and writing skills and magic and thus makes you quite intelligent. Your weaknesses are more like quirks and do not really offset your strengths.

I apologize for the confusion I caused.

[Menweh Reolláolásh’miés]

No its okay! I figured stuff out! and now that I have internet again I'll post it up! YAY!!!

[Menweh Reolláolásh’miés]

Okay I added a weakness, I have another two lined up if I need to! They'll be interesting, but I'll only add them if I need more! okay here we go! comments! 

[Eléyr Fásamár]

Hey, Menweh! You may want to throw in those other weaknesses, but here's a quick grammar/formatting run through.

and always has some strains<--I'm pretty sure you meant strands here too. of hair falling in front of her face

Menweh's skin tone is a soft moonlit flesh color that is sharply accented by her golden-white hair and her darker colored eyes.(space)Menweh for the most part has a serene and calm expression upon her angular face and a smile always on her lips.

One<--On her index finger she wears the seal of her family, this ring is what she used to close documents and shipping orders with, as of now it is her only link to her family in Aer'ylferian.

There where<were many times when she has been balancing account books and would stop for long periods of time just to daydream about exploring a abandoned ruin of some forgotten people

-Menweh has a horrific case of arachnaphobia and will not be able to do anything except scream and run away until the spider, or spider look alike is gone or killed.
[/color]<--remove]

Really Menweh, I think you should be ready for approval any time now. Fix these up and throw in those weaknesses, though I didn't check the history, and you should be ready to go.

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