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Author Topic: Arcuar Gothfeng  (Read 6660 times)
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Khiera Meneris
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Human, Hjoria


« Reply #15 on: April 12, 2004, 12:00:22 PM »

Ah ... seems like Rayne beat me to a meticulous look-through :wink2  



Hold me.
Soothe me.
Love me.

Save me from my RAGE.

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Arcuar Gothfeng
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« Reply #16 on: April 12, 2004, 06:01:22 PM »

Well, I've done most things that stand on your list, thank you :)   But for some things, you should pay closer attention. For one example, Arcuar's father is a bowyer. And bowyers make bows. That's how he received his own bow which he wields now. Furthermore, thanks :hug   And thanks for the :goodidea  

Edited by: Arcuar Gothfeng at: 4/12/04 15:39
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Khiera Meneris
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Human, Hjoria


« Reply #17 on: April 13, 2004, 02:26:22 AM »

Hmmm ... i see your edits ...

1. Seems like you added quite a bit to the strengths section. Given my concerns still with your character's age and his wide "repertoire" of skills, your strengths and weaknesses do not seem to be balanced right now. I suggest you do some tweaking that section to have a more balanced character in terms of strengths and weaknesses.

2. The hair part that Rayne pointed out still hasn't been tweaked.

3.
Quote:
The two years after, he started to follow Ximaxian magic classes. Arcúar was allowed to enter the school of Ximax because of his thirst for knowledge. At first he wasn't allowed in too much of the areas, but as he learned more, he could go anywhere he wished inside the Ximaxian School.


This, i strongly suspect, is going to be a problem. First, there's the consideration of how he travelled to Southern Sarvonia and how long that would take (probably around the range of 1 or 2 years), then, how he makes his way to Ximax, and -- this is the big question mark part -- I doubt that he'll be allowed to enter Ximax for an indefinite period of time just because he has a great thirst of knowledge. Especially not being allowed to go where he wished instead the school, Rayne will most certainly disagree with that point and can tell you more about that.

4.
Quote:
... he has a backpack in which he keeps his books for school, his food and his reagents for his spells.


You mentioned that he has a little knowledge of magic, and now you mention reagents for spells. So your character can cast spells? If so, you would need a magic section to briefly outline his abilities at magic and his (Ximaxian) level of magic. Also, you will need to account for how he learnt to cast spells in his history, and the obvious method would be to learn at Ximax. Your current account of how he got to Ximax will not work. They only accept students beginning from the age of 12, and it takes quite a long time and lots of hard work in full time studying to advance up even one level in magic. That's how the magic system works here. I suggest you do some more research on the magic system if you want your character to possess magical abilities.





Hold me.
Soothe me.
Love me.

Save me from my RAGE.

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Arcuar Gothfeng
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« Reply #18 on: April 13, 2004, 04:34:22 AM »

I can find a new word every time, eh? Cool. But anyway, thanks for the help, and I've re-edited said issues. And I have removed the part about travelling, so that creates less fuss. More fears and weaknesses added. The entire hair thing removed. The Ximaxian School thing redone. There's about all which was needed, I think.

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Mina
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« Reply #19 on: April 13, 2004, 04:45:22 AM »

It might be a good idea to check out this thread first.  Basically, you cannot have Xeuá magic, unless you are very knowledgable in the magic system here, which you probably are not unless you are one of the magic developers.  It is also not possible to be able to perform both Xeuá magic and elemental magic.  


There is no emotion; there is peace.
There is no ignorance; there is knowledge.
There is no passion; there is serenity.
There is no death; there is the Force.

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Radaroc
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« Reply #20 on: April 13, 2004, 06:51:22 AM »

*walks up to Rayne*
*writes a little ticket on a piece of paper*
Thats a 4112, over-acting
*drops the slip on the prone Rayne*
*wanders off*



"Ok!  Who's talking...what?  Oh, hello down there."


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Mina
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« Reply #21 on: April 13, 2004, 07:51:22 AM »

:lol  


There is no emotion; there is peace.
There is no ignorance; there is knowledge.
There is no passion; there is serenity.
There is no death; there is the Force.

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Arcuar Gothfeng
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« Reply #22 on: April 13, 2004, 03:46:22 PM »

Terribly sorry I let that out. Edited now.



Arcuar's Quote:
Battle is not a fight for Death,
Battle is a fight for Life...

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Arcuar Gothfeng
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« Reply #23 on: April 13, 2004, 11:05:22 PM »

Not so original now. Dang But he isn't Necromancing himself, hell, he fears it as death. *ba-doom boom* The Wengûl crafting issue is redone, however.  



Arcuar's Quote:
Battle is not a fight for Death,
Battle is a fight for Life...

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Khiera Meneris
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Human, Hjoria


« Reply #24 on: April 13, 2004, 11:48:22 PM »

Ok, i think your CD should be alright now ...

... just one thing, and maybe it's a little nitpicky, but, just state in your magic section that his magic skills are around Level 1, or something to that effect.

I'll give approval, but make sure you put that in :)

Right ... one more approval and you'll be granted your title! Good job!



Hold me.
Soothe me.
Love me.

Save me from my RAGE.

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Arcuar Gothfeng
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« Reply #25 on: April 13, 2004, 11:51:22 PM »

Yay! Done! I thank you sooooooooooooooo much for your guidance, all of you! Thanks!



Arcuar's Quote:
Battle is not a fight for Death,
Battle is a fight for Life...

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Koldar Mondrakken
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« Reply #26 on: April 14, 2004, 04:06:22 AM »

Well, no hinderance to your approvals but some thoughts

Where's his Tsubar? Any Kassite who is accepted as a  warrior gets one, either inherited or esspecially crafted for him.

No mentioning about any comrades? Kassite's train their children normally in groups. Would be worth considering if or if not why it's not the case.

Kassites are rather superstituous, they even consider the Kayr mostly as demigods.

I wouldn't think that Kassites would send off anyone to Ximax given that Korweyn is a highly developed empire and they're pretty proud about their role in it.


Just some thoughts I had reading through it, refine what you want. I'm seldom enough reading CDs so I don't want to stand in the way of approval.-;)


Koldar Mondrakken, Knight of the Moonlight

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Arcuar Gothfeng
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« Reply #27 on: April 14, 2004, 05:51:22 AM »

Tsubar? Read nothing about it, sorry. Went through the Kassite description five times, but never found anything about a Tsubar. Comrades I'm working on right now. He's quite intellectual, and thus less superstituous as others. Just like me. He IS me, after all. He wished to go to the Ximaxian Academy of Magic himself, no explanations needed, to my opinion. Tell me more about the Tsubar, and I'll get cracking at it.

P.S.: Nice Signature, where can I got one of those?



Arcuar's Quote:
Battle is not a fight for Death,
Battle is a fight for Life...

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Khiera Meneris
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Human, Hjoria


« Reply #28 on: April 14, 2004, 07:01:22 AM »

*rubs eyes*

Can't believe i didn't notice the Tsubar as well after going through the entry at least twice :eek

Did you change the posticon back to a "!" Acuar? Just wondering.

Players who are good with graphic programs and whatnot here can create their own nice looking sigs ... you can create your own custom sig, in accordance to board guidelines of course, or, you can go the easy way and get to know those who make fabulous sigs, and then request them to create one for you :wink2  



Hold me.
Soothe me.
Love me.

Save me from my RAGE.

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Arcuar Gothfeng
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« Reply #29 on: April 14, 2004, 11:47:22 PM »

Done. I didn't change it back to the "!", though. Odd... But anyways, it's now officially approved?



Arcuar's Quote:
Battle is not a fight for Death,
Battle is a fight for Life...

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