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16  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: The Tundra Beast Legend on: 22 November 2002, 23:20:00
First of all, thanks for the comments.

About the inconsistency you mentioned, I donīt think of it in that way. He could deduce that the bear was trying to help his son, that the killers were the elfs, but... the bear was involucrated. His son died defending a white bear, because of a white bear. I think of it in that way, as Viresse said in her post, he is blinded.

Either way, I love your idea so Iīm going to change it.  :b  
Thank you.

Best regards, Sahndorf.

Edited part of the post: I have just edited the story. If you like the way it turns now, itīs ready. Personally, I like the way it is. (But I also like it before adding Talia idea so donīt trust me so much :rolleyes  )

Edited by: Sahndorf at: 11/22/02 6:08:25 am
17  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: The Tundra Beast Legend on: 22 November 2002, 02:29:00
Chan-Chan :D     I hope you like it.

I want to make a special thank to Viresse, who helped me with my language problems and gave the frozen spell idea.

Thank you!!!!!

18  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / The Tundra Beast Legend on: 22 November 2002, 02:25:00
The Tundra Beast Lege

One cold night on the silent and desolate tundra of Cyhalloi the crackle of a fire and voices, like a whisper, swept across the plains. A Karīii family huddled around the circle of the fire; four children, their parents and the old grandmother. They were sharing a moment of talking and laughter after the dinner but something made them stop. A distant growl, filled with sorrow and anger, cut the silence. The children ran to their father for protection. He looked at them and, laughing, said:

" Come on, itīs just a bear, cowards. Now return to your places. "

Reluctantly, they did as their father told but paid attention for any other sound. Another laugh broke the silence. It was their grandmother. She looked across to the parents and said:

"Just a bear? You know itīs not just a bear. Maybe it was a bear in other times but nowadays it is more than that. Do you wish to hear the story, my children?"

"Come on, mother, stop with this nonsense. You are going to scare them," the father insisted.

"Oh, hush! They want to hear what I have to say. I suggest you go to your fur lair with your wife because there is no place around this fire for incredulity."

So the parents got up and left. But the father, wanting to have the last word, warned the children:

"Remember, I donīt want you to come in the night to wake me up. If you are afraid, well, you chose to hear the story. Have a nice rest."

The children hesitated for a moment but Grandmother's stories were always great; it would be worth a whole sleepless night, even fearing the slightest sound. They sat as comfortably as they could and waited for their grandmother to begin.

And she did, as follows:

A long, long time ago, here, somewhere in this land where you are sitting, maybe in the same place, a family decided to settle with their carryhome. This family was composed of two people, a Karīii father called Erphon and his son, Kalish.

Kalish was 12 years old and had been raised since his fifth year by his father. His mother, Maytra, died one stormy night, after leaving the carryhome area and becoming lost. Seeking shelter, she entered a cave and realized that she wasnīt alone. In the cave, a female white bear was hibernating with her cubs. Smelling the human, she woke, and fed herself and her cubs with Kalish's mother. A few days after the bear had left the cave, Maytra's remains were found by her husband.

Finding himself alone to take care of his son, Erphon did the best he could, trying to fill the place of a mother. The two got along well, and formed a close relationship.

But Erphon's heart was filled with anger, and he started a great hunt of white bears, trying to annihilate them all. His reputation grew among the people and he became known by everyone as Erphon the White Bear Hunter.

When he wasnīt hunting, he loved to spend time with his son. Their days consisted of playing, practicing fighting, sharing meals and talking. Kalish was an intelligent boy and learned quickly. He was always looking to learn something new.

It was this thirst for knowledge and his insatiable curiosity that one day made him lose direction, becoming lost in a forest. The moon soon showed its face, and Kalish decided to look for a place to rest and wait until morning to return home. As his mother did years ago, he entered a cave. When his eyes became accustomed to the dark, he found a wounded cub of a white bear; about 1or 2 months old. Despite all the hate he felt for those creatures, he decided to cure it and stay by its side.

There was a moment when it seemed as if the cub would die, but Kalish stayed nursing it all day and night. When he returned to the camp after two days, he found his father really worried and preparing his things to start searching. Erphon asked his son about his absence and Kalish lied for the first time, telling only that he lost the track in the forest. If he had told his father the truth, the older man would certainly have killed the cub.

From that day, Kalish and the bear (Porton, as he named it), were friends and met daily to share a meal, or just stay together, never telling his father. The relationship with the bear grew stronger and they developed a rustic kind of comunication, understanding each other without speaking. But one of the things Kalish loved to do most was to ride on Porton. The beast had no problem with it and also enjoyed having Kalish on its back.

The friendship between Kalish and the bear lasted until his twentieth year. In that year, something happened which would change their lives forever. It was a nice day to be outside and Kalish declined his father's invitation to hunt, planning to meet with his animal friend.

When he reached the usual meeting point he discovered a troublesome situation. A Cyhallrhim elf was aiming his bow at his bear friend. Without stopping to think, Kalish drew out his moonblade and ran towards the elf.

The elf was not facing Kalish so it was easy for the Karīii to reach the enemy in a few leaps and cut his head off without danger. Making eye contact with the bear, he realized it was unharmed, but at this moment the bear stood on its feet and started smelling the air impatiently. Kalish looked around and found three more elves with bows but this time aiming at him!

He threw his only two seastars at two of them and hit in their chests, killing both of them. When he turned, looking for others, an arrow hit him in his left shoulder. He fell against the bear's body and this kept him from collapsing completely. Using the last of his strength he threw his moonblade at the elf, hitting him in the stomach and ending his life.

Knowing that he was losing too much blood to walk, he decided to lie over Portonīs back, hoping the bear would take him to his carryhome. But they werenīt alone. There was another elf, watching all the while. She was part of the hunters' group and the only one left alive. Angry, and wanting revenge, as the bear started walking, she prepared to cast a spell upon the two. She raised one hand, whispered words, and the air became colder. Five minutes later, the bear and Kalish were formed into a unique structure, victims of a Freezing Spell. Their two bodies were frozen together inside a mass of ice. Satisfied with herself, the elf left.

That evening, Erphon walked to the forest, searching for Kalish to show him the fruits of his hunting. When he reached the ice statue he shouted in pain and began to weep.

His son, dead. And also friends with the creature that took away his wife some time ago. Erphon saw Kalish as a victim of his own stupidity, ending his life to protect those who ruined the family, leaving his father alone and betrayed. But his initial anger soon was transformed into the greatest of anguish. He had loved that child more than anything, more than he had loved his wife.

He stayed by his son's frozen body for seven days and seven nights without eating anything, wishing to end his own life. But when he woke up, the morning of the eighth day, he was alone. The ice had shattered and melted, and nothing was left. That day, he realized that his days of white bear hunting were over. His son and that bear were one creature now. He couldnīt continue killing white bears, fearing that with the death of one of them, he would be killing his son.

His son's spirit joined with the White Bear, human and animal together, and from that day, became known by everyone as the Tundra Beast. It may still be roaming around the Cyhalloi lands, looking to quench its thirst for vengeance.

The grandmother looked at the children and saw them sitting close together, hugging each other. Another growl broke the night silence, more distant than the first and resembling a laugh. The children stared at their grandmother, trembling (mostly because of the cold but also because of the fear), their eyes asking a silent question.

"Very well, young ones, you can sleep with me for this night. But try to wake up before your father does!"

They stood up and ran inside their grandmother's tent. She followed, not forgetting a last smile to the moon.

Edited by: Sahndorf at: 11/23/02 5:09:27 am
19  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: The Deserted Mansion. Short standalone story... on: 16 November 2002, 00:54:00
I like it. Wish to read more.

I also like open endings but this is too much open for me to love it. So, please go on.

Will be waiting for the full story.

Best regards, Sahndorf.

20  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: A prayer to Echiilan on: 03 November 2002, 00:00:00
::Sanguinary? Not at all. A couple of posion herbs will do the job:: ;)

I feel a bit embarrased after your post because Iīm just a poetry rookie. Someone introduced it to me a year ago. Before that moment I donīt like reading poetry and less writing it. I enjoy writing some short stories and a lot of essays. But now... I canīt live without it!!!!!!!!!!! :)

I thanks in advance all your future help. You know, theory is a mistery for me. I just write what I feel trying to make it sound good thatīs why Í apreciated all your comments about scansion, rhyme, etc. And donīt forget those languages corrections.

Thanks a lot and see you soon, my dear bardic teacher.

21  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: A prayer to Echiilan on: 02 November 2002, 00:34:00

::Looks around, his secret undercovered, wondering if he should kill the bard or tell the truth. Better tell the truth:: :b

I confess... English is my second language. Spanish is the first.

::Looking at ALL the mistakes he remembers his english teacher warning about re-reading after writing::

About the mistakes, I write the prayer without stoping and just read it a couple of times after writing it checking the sonority.
I must confess Iīm an incurable absent-minded.

Thanks for the comments and suggestions. Iīm always waiting for them after posting. They are really helpful and I learn a lot from them.

Best regards, Sahndorf.  

22  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / A prayer to Echiilan on: 01 November 2002, 02:04:00
I really donīt know where to post it (if here or in the religion thread). If itīs wrong please let me know and I will change it.
Please feel free to comment on it.

Lady Echiilan, moon among stars,
give me the strength to inflict        
as much pain on my enemies
as the orcs inflicted on you.

Lady Echiilan, my swift arrow,
point me to the right path
and after a never-long flight
let me aim towards victory.

Lady Echiilan, search my heart;
where hate and desire live.
Feed them and watch them grow
as your most esteemed children.

Touch my hopes for revenge
with your sword and, as ashes,
spread them all around the earth,
looking for their fulfilment.

You, my lady, who stays by Queprurīs side,
hear my plea and give an end to my sorrow.

:rollin   :rollin   :rollin   :rollin   :rollin   :rollin   :rollin  

Edited by: Sahndorf at: 11/1/02 5:59:30 am
23  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: She is watching on: 31 October 2002, 00:05:00
I like it. The sound of the end of each verse is just (looks for the way to express it in english) sticky..

But maybe you could make it a litlle longer? 2 more verses?
I feel itīs lacking something that maybe that 2 verses can add. Itīs just my opinion.

Anyway, I like it. Good work there.

:: Left the thread just fascinated and repeting as hipnotized
Please do not venture into the Water Marshes,
It only causes death to those that she watches.

:rollin  :rollin  :rollin  :rollin  :rollin  :rollin  :rollin  

24  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: Children's Counting Rhymes on: 27 October 2002, 02:41:00
:: Look around searching for a big rock to hide but no being able to find it he accept his mistake looking at his feet and saying::

"I promise to pay more attention to updates next time"

Thanks for the add, Artimidor. :rollin  :rollin  

25  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: Children's Counting Rhymes on: 25 October 2002, 00:41:00
YESSSS!!!! Please Sir Federkiel create a site for Childrenīs Rhymes. You know what they say: "Children and women first!!!!!" :D  
(I know it is used during wreckages and Santharia is far of that situation but well...)

My dear Bard. I accept with humility your changes. Now it looks great. I place a comma after food. I think itīs ok.
Good you change the shed. I donīt like it at all but couldnīt find a more suitable word. (It seems to be in front of my eyes. Or may I say mouth?)

Well, so here is the final version!!!!!!

Take a seat, hereīs your plate,
Donīt look at me with that face.
If you donīt like what you see,
Here's a tip for you from me.
Look at... that! And... over there!
Lady Echiilan is everywhere!
If you do not eat your food,
She will come and drink your blood.

I take note of your advice and will apply it in further works, Judith (Can I call you that way? I donīt like the only Bard "thing". Maybe Bard Judith?)

Best regards and see you around.  

   We are the singers of songs, the writers of words, the tellers of stories. We entertain, amuse, and instruct. We deflate the pompous and uplift the depressed. We are those who see the beauty in all things and share that vision.

    We are the Bards

26  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: Children's Counting Rhymes on: 23 October 2002, 23:11:00
Hi there!!!!!
Dearest Bard, I have something to share with you and ask for your opinion. Itīs a Karii song for the children when they donīt want to eat their food. My modern Tharian is not as good as yours but Iīll do my best. Here it is:

Take a sit, hereīs your plate
Donīt look at me with that face
If you donīt like what you see
Let me tell you just one thing
Look at that and over there
Lady Echiilan is everywhere
If you donīt eat all your food
She will shed out all your blood


Do you think this could be an add to the children songs compilation? (OOC asking Iīm open to any suggestion to improve it. Feel free to post what you think. Everyone.)

   We are the singers of songs, the writers of words, the tellers of stories. We entertain, amuse, and instruct. We deflate the pompous and uplift the depressed. We are those who see the beauty in all things and share that vision.

    We are the Bards

27  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: Children's Counting Rhymes on: 23 October 2002, 22:31:00
Thanks my dear Bard. That song reminds me about the Karii. All pleasant memories (at least this are the ones I want to remember by now. There are others, much less pleasant, but them I reserve to my nightmares) I think is the time for all Sorren to discover us and that would be my duty, or part of it, by my life. Make the Karii culture a all-world knowledge.
It will bring me more than an enemy but I donīt care. Itīs time for the night to meet with the day. Itīs time for the shadows to became corporeal beings.

I must warn you about your gently proposal to share your knowledge. I may result a bit annoying in my path and ask you a lot of question. :b  If this would be a problem you have the chance to give back your step (starting by now 10... 9... 8...... )

::hope she doesnīt... hope she doesnīt... hope she doesnīt...
hope she doesnīt... hope she doesnīt... hope she doesnīt... ::

Postcriptum: My sincere apologies for that "miss" thing, my Bard. It was the first and last time I īll call you that way.  :)

All the best luck in your travels and feel free to ask for my assistance in anything you need. I will aid you without questioning your reasons.

28  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: Children's Counting Rhymes on: 22 October 2002, 21:48:00
WOOOOWWWWWW!!!!  :rollin

It looks great!!!!! (Iīm not good at designing. Maybe someone can tell me how to make that master piece?)
Thanks a lot for showing it to me.
Miss Judith, are you planning to do a recopilation of children rhymes?

29  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: Children's Counting Rhymes on: 19 October 2002, 03:04:00
I thank your response and I must tell you that I agree with all what you exposed in your post. I will be waiting for your translation. If you have any problem with it just ask; I may be of help.

But now I have to make you a couple of questions and proposals.

First of all, I had heard some gossip about an ancient library, a great one, in the Kasumarii tribe. It was hidden, and now almost forgotten. But Iīm going to do a little research on it. Would you accept and invitation to a dinner? I would love to take a closer look on that vellum. I think the numeration correspond to an order set in that library. But just think.

And going out of topic... I was wondering... that maybe... by chance...
are you looking for an assistant? :o
I just want to became a great bard and well, I must a great path to walk. And I think I can learn a lot from you.

Well, see you soon. All the best.

30  Santharian World Development / The Santharian Library / Re: Children's Counting Rhymes on: 18 October 2002, 03:03:00
Wow!!!!! They are great. :eek
and A SKIPPING CHANT (I have heard it when I was in Bardavos).
May be you know an after children go to bed rhyme chant from the Kasumarii? Because I remember my mom chanting it to me when I was very little but I forget it. It just a distant echo by now. Still with meaning but no words, just a feeling.
Hope you know it and if not maybe you could tell me where I will be able to find some clue about it.
Thanks in advance. :D  

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