* 
Welcome Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?


*
gfxgfx Home Forum Help Search Login Register   gfxgfx
gfx gfx
gfx
Pages: [1]
Print
Author Topic: The Dark History of Dante Majere the full Story  (Read 1473 times)
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
DanteMajere
Newbie
*

Gained Aura: 0
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 9



View Profile
« on: 30 July 2009, 08:52:08 »

Chapter 1 A good life gone bad:


       Dante Majere had  bronze skin, blood red eyes,long  hair as white as snow, and was extremely well built like a dwarf. Which is very unusual for a Centoraurian twelve year old boy. He was the son of the great Maze and Teressa Majere. He was also the younger brother to Fable and Rose Majere. His father was the great general Majere of the Centoraurian tribe. His mother a great wizadress.
        He was training with his brother, sister, and father when they heard the alarm sound that there was a intruder in the building.
       "Rose take Fable and Dante and hide somewhere safe now!" Maze said to Rose. He pushed them forward and unsheathed his great claymore that had defeated many foes before.
        "Show yourself assassin! You came here for me so show your face and fight me like a man!" Maze hollered while looking around wielding his great blade. Suddenly a ork of about six feet came into view.
         "Ah general, it will be a shame to kill you. Actually it will be a great honor, to go back to my home and say i have killed the great General Majere. I will be a hero." The ork said. He was wearing a sickly green color of armor and a broad sword. He had a bow and arrow strapped on his back. He then unsheathed his sword and strode forward, slowly walking toward Maze.
          "At least state your name ork, you must be held highly to have the ability to speak common." Said Maze.
           "You're right, I am held highly, my brother is the ork general, or at least he was until you killed him. Now I will get my brother's revenge and his fame. Oh and my name is not important for in a moment you will be dead so it would do you no good anyway." Said the ork as he lunged at Maze and swung his sword with all his might. Maze blocked the blow and slashed at the ork's gut, he only barely chipped his armor. Maze stunned that a ork could know such swift and graceful combat. He was even more surprised that the ork dodged his blow. Maze gave another swift blow that would have taken off his enemies head but the ork ducked and stabbed him in the stomach, the ork smiled as warm human blood ran down his arm. The creature pulled out his blade thinking it was done but the next thing he knew the claymore was chopping off his head.
           Maze then stumbled over to his children who had seen the whole thing and laid down and died. Rose was holding back Fable but Dante rushed forward to cry over his father's dead body. Fable walked over and picked up his father's sword and picked it up. He then to cried in grief for his father's death.
           "Rose, go tell mother that he has been murdered, and that the assassin is dead also." He commanded. "And Dante, one day when you can beat me in a duel you may have this sword. But for now I will train you as he did." Dante wiped away his tears, he thought to himself that this is what dad would want.
            "Okay Fable yo and Rose may train me." Dante said.
             "What! I thought that only I was training you!" Fable yelled.
             "No, Rose is older than you therefor, she knows more than. You know that dad was training her before you were born." Dante said.
             "Fine she can help. I guess," Fable said sounding disappointed. "Come on let's go comfort mother."


Chapter 2 First battle:


            Dante was practicing magic with his mother, she was teaching him fire ball. It had been five years since his father was murdered.
            "No Dante, you're doing it wrong! Trace the symbols in the air, chant the words, feel the fire coming out of you finger tips," Teressa said getting frustrated with her son. "Now go again, one more time." Dante then did as he was told and imagined the flames coming out of his fingers and killing the ork who had murdered his father all over again.
              "Oh my lord! Dante you did it! Now agai-" She was interupted by Fable and Rose.
               "Dante it's time for you to show us that you are ready to go into battle by showing us if you have surpassed us." Fable said. Rose only nodded her head.
               "Come little brother it is time." She said. Dante looked over at his mother, she nodded. Dante grabbed his sword and his spell pouches. He through on his armor and walked after his older siblings.
               "All right Dante, I will start off easy, then as you progress I will start getting harder okay." Fable said. Dante nodded his head. The duel started off simple just that Dante needed to start blocking and throwing attacks. Then it got harder and Dante had to use defense and offense at the same time. Then Fable fully went with every blow he could. Dante got away and sent a fireball flying at his older brother. Fable looking surprised tried to dive out of the way but still got burned pretty bad.
                "Good, a mixture of sword and magic. That's very good." Fable said but was surprised to see that Dante just sent another fireball at him. The fireball hit him straight in the face, Fable went flying across the arena.
                 "You let your guard down big brother," Dante said chuckling to himself. Then he put the tip of his sword at his brother's chest. "I guess I've won, hand over the sword." Dante said dropping his sword and grabbed his knew one. The one that had once belonged to his father. "It feels good in my hand." He said.
                   "Swing it, lets see how you can fight with it." Fable said. So Dante swung the claymore to show his brother that it felt as light as a feather. "Amazing! I've never seen anyone handle a sword that heavy before." Fable said looking astonished.
                    "That's strange, to me it doesn't way a thing." Dante said looking at his brother like he is crazy, Fable was staring at Dante like he was a god.
« Last Edit: 01 August 2009, 03:28:43 by DanteMajere » Logged

"Hope is a walking dream, and love is a forgotten legend."
Seeker
Santh. Member
***

Gained Aura: 465
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 1.934


Fire Mage


View Profile
« Reply #1 on: 30 July 2009, 09:40:05 »

Dante

Before you start developing you need to introduce yourself in the newbie forum.  As dek already mentioned.  If you look towards the top of this page, you will see a button that says 'I'm New!' ... if you click on that it'll take you to all of the information you'll need. Once there, click on the various links and read the information that is there.

To introduce yourself, please go to this link and start a new thread there. What you are interested in, whether you are an artist, writer, musician etc, that sort of stuff.

At that point the long timers will help you out with what is appropriate to start developing and what is not.
Logged

Every entry deserves a picture.   -Seeker
DanteMajere
Newbie
*

Gained Aura: 0
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 9



View Profile
« Reply #2 on: 03 April 2010, 03:59:18 »

Alright i went to the forum and said i'm new, but that was in like august haha so can anyone help me. I love to write, but every writer still needs some pointers right
« Last Edit: 03 April 2010, 04:05:58 by DanteMajere » Logged

"Hope is a walking dream, and love is a forgotten legend."
seth ghibta
Santh. Member
***

Gained Aura: 138
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 766



View Profile
« Reply #3 on: 05 April 2010, 20:19:18 »

Hi Dante,
welcome to Santh - sorry i think i missed your intro thread or i probably would have stopped by to say hello.
it's good that you're so keen to get into writing stories so quickly, but i'm afraid i've a couple of suggestions - they're not law or anything, but they are my best advice - see, i've wiped all the dust and bits of fluff off and everything. grin
firstly, though it's not a hard and fast rule by any means, we generally try to encourage new contributors to start with a standard entry, the kind with a template to follow - library entries are trickier because of the lack of template, and because, although they are stories and poems etc, we still try to ground them in the World of Caelereth. at the minute i can't quite see where this story's come from - it doesn't read like somebody writing a biography of a noted figure, or a fictional adventure, because you're using your own dev name as the main character (something i'll come back to in a sec). this is one of the reasons we like our new devvers to try the more standard kinds of contribution first - have you looked through the bestiary, herbarium, and miscellaneous forums to see if any ideas strike you?
my other point comes back to your use of your developing name as the protagonist for a story. i am not saying you can't. what i am saying is that th name you develop under represents a character who works for the compendium within santharia, and travels around accordingly (possibly only in their spare time, as a lot of the characters also exist in the rp forums and get into lots of interesting messes evil) gathering accounts of this wonderful world. if you choose to tie your character to a story in the library, you are not only saying that the character is important enough for somebody to write their life down, but also you're restricting yourself a lot more than you might want. this story so far reads quite like a cd off the rp forums turned into continuous prose, and i'm having trouble seeing what purpose it serves here. if you use the search function to look through the compendium for a few of our veteran devvers' names, i'm guessing you'll find them mentioned in their team profile, maybe in one of Dek's brilliant odes, and perhaps in fleeting references by other team members or themselves when we need an authoritative voice for bits and pieces. what you almost certainly won't find are whole stories and accounts of them, or atleast not unless there's a very very good reason for it. a compendiumist's job is to write or draw about what they "find" on their travels, not about themselves. i'm not saying you can't, but i would seriously advise that you left it for a while, and explored a bit first. :)

hope that's helpful and not too overbearing,
Seth. heart
Logged

violence is not the answer, but you get marks if you show your working.

Santharia needs your molluscs! donate molluscs now!
Seeker
Santh. Member
***

Gained Aura: 465
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 1.934


Fire Mage


View Profile
« Reply #4 on: 06 April 2010, 02:10:28 »

 Dante,

Seth very articulately wrote what I imagine many of us are thinking.  I would recommend waiting to write stories about yourself until you have been around awhile.

In the meantime we have a whole bunch of things that need to get written (plants, weapons, beasts and animals) and lots of other things I am sure that would work as well.  So the point here is that we could really use you writing skills. 
Logged

Every entry deserves a picture.   -Seeker
Pages: [1]
Print
Jump to:  

Recent
[27 March 2019, 00:01:57]

[21 June 2018, 14:28:00]

[31 May 2017, 06:35:55]

[06 May 2017, 05:27:04]

[03 April 2017, 01:15:03]

[26 March 2017, 12:48:25]

[15 March 2017, 02:23:07]

[15 March 2017, 02:20:28]

[15 March 2017, 02:17:52]

[14 March 2017, 20:23:43]

[06 February 2017, 04:53:35]

[31 January 2017, 08:45:52]

[15 December 2016, 15:50:49]

[26 November 2016, 23:16:38]

[27 October 2016, 07:42:01]

[27 September 2016, 18:51:05]

[11 September 2016, 23:17:33]

[11 September 2016, 23:15:27]

[11 September 2016, 22:58:56]

[03 September 2016, 22:22:23]
Members
Total Members: 1019
Latest: lolanixon
Stats
Total Posts: 144589
Total Topics: 11052
Online Today: 28
Online Ever: 700
(23 January 2020, 20:05:39)
Users Online
Users: 0
Guests: 21
Total: 21

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2005, Simple Machines
TinyPortal v0.9.8 © Bloc
Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!
Theme based on Cerberus with Risen adjustments by Bloc and Krelia
Modified By Artimidor for The Santharian Dream
gfx
gfxgfx gfxgfx