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Altario Shialt-eck-Gorrin
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« Reply #15 on: 25 June 2011, 18:30:04 »

A complete check as promised, though I apologize that this made the entry miss this update.  Edit in Chartreuse, while comments will be in Burgundy.

Monh-Rum - Amphibian


Overview
The reclusive Monh-Rum is a wholly remarkable amphibian. Living most of its life in the Gotgavnynn hot springs network of the Northern Sarvonian Iceland's Coast, the beast's rock-like skin and tremendous size make it a very dangerous predator. Luckily, the creature is incredibly rare and very seldom seen outside of the hot springs, and even more occasionally seen out of water.  Should this be "less occassionally"?  There is less of a chance to see it out of water, correct?

Description
The Monh-Rum does not stand far from the ground, only measuring around a ped at its tallest. However, what the beast lacks in height it more than makes up for in length. The arctic amphibian measures about two and a half to three and a half peds from mouth to the tip of its tail. Almost half of this length is made up of the thick, strong tail itself. The beast's four weak limbs protrude from its thick body horizontally, as if they're more useful to keep the creature from rolling over than actually moving its massive girth. Each limb is very short and ends in four equally small digits. On land, these limbs seem only to play a minor role in the creature's locomotion, aiding its snake-like slither. In the water, however, they have been seen using their limbs often to help them propel. However due to their small size, it is hard to tell how much the small limbs actually help the beast's swimming.

The Monh-Rum's wide, flat head is shaped not unlike the head of a shovel and seems almost immediately connected to its body, with very little to no neck. Two small black eyes protrude from the the top of its skull. The creature's wide mouth is full of very small teeth. Despite their small size, the Monh-Rum's powerful jaws make good use of the sharp teeth. However, the first thing one notices when the creature's mouth opens is its wide blue tongue.

The tough skin of this gigantic salamander is somewhat of a mystery. Unlike most amphibians, which have smooth skin, the Monh-Rum's hide has much the same color and consistency of un-worked stone. Thus, a careless passersby might pass one sunning itself near a lake and never notice the beast. Its coloration varies little in hue, staying mostly solid throughout the creature's body. The beast is occasionally seen at the bottom of clear shallow lakes, using its hide as camouflage in an attempt to ambush would-be prey.

Special Abilities
The Monh-Rum's rock-like skin is very tough. Not quite as strong or dense as stone, many an Ice Tribesmen has found that piercing the beast's hide is a difficult task. This tough skin seems not only to protect the creature from the other inhabitants of the Icelands, but from the hot water from the Gotgavnynn network.

While usually incredibly passive whilst on land, the Monh-Rum has been known to chase attackers or would-be prey over very short distances. It is style of movement is more akin to a snake-like slither than an actual run, though it is aided by its short limbs. During this burst of movement, the beast can reach speeds matching that of a running human, though only for about a dash. Thus it pays to be wary around these seemingly rock-like predators.

The most dangerous ability of the Monh-Rum is its bite. Its saliva has a fast acting paralytic effect on the area which is bitten. Though this does not help the beast take down its smaller fish prey, it is tremendous help when attacking larger creatures or defending itself against a human or orc. Combined with its ability to move with short bursts of speed on land and its stone-like skin, the Monh-Rum's dangerous bite make the creature a hardy adversary.

Territory
The Monh-Rum makes its home in the Icelands region of Northern Sarvonia. Though mostly seen on land, the creature is believed to spend most of its time in the water in the network of hot-springs that the Ice Tribes call the Gotgavnynn. Through this network of under-ground springs the Monh-Rum travel between various lakes and rivers. They have even been spotted in the summer sunning on ocean shores and islands. The large amounts of time spent in the hot-spring network or bathing in what sun there is seems to make due for the fact that most amphibians prefer a warmer climate.

Couple of things here.  First, is that your entire entry contradics the Ice Tribe reference to the Monh-rum.  The IT entry states
Quote
As for hunting: Meat is enjoyed by the Ice Tribe and their diet includes the cuncu sheep, the woolly boar, pinnips, penguins, sea elephants, polar bears, snow foxes, ice rabbits, rheeahs and monh rum, a large amphibious creature that comes out of the oceans in the short Icelands summer and lies in the sun in order to gather heat and energy from it’s weak rays. Monh rum is however a very dangerous animal that is deadly when attacked.
 Instead of living in the ocean, you have moved them to the hot springs.  Personally, I prefer your version, as we already have Talia's Xpptyxxyyzzyyl (sp :P) monster that lives in the ocean and comes onto land to lay eggs or something (sorry Talia, I'm too lazy to look up the actual facts buck), so having the Monh-rum differ from this is preferable.  We'll just have to convince Arti to let us change the IT entry to reflect this change.

The second point here is that the Gotgavnynn have not been tied to a distinct area, just generally to the Icelands Coast.  I would suggest that we expand this to include the northern areas of the Heaths of Wilderon.  North of the Gathorn Mountains, in Iceland Coast proper, you would find few orcs.  Too many orc ice tribe wars over the years.  South of the Gathorns, in the HoW are where nomadic orcs are found.  More opportunity for lakes in this area as well, for noth of the Gathorns is perma ice for the most part.  Doing this, you get to use the camoflauge properties of the skin as well.  A grey creature sunning itself on a white snow covered field doesn't exactly blend :P  Though, by all means, keep it north of the Gathorns as well.

One last question.  The Remusians make use of the hot springs by creating small farms
Quote
The other type of agriculture is Odenbellug, which, as the name suggests, uses the Odenbels (hot springs) that can be found on the frozen wastes. This is a very labour intensive undertaking, and truthfully, provides little more than a pittance in relation to that work. However, a pittance compared to nothing is what the Remusians face everyday, and they go about it in taciturn fashion, like most everything they do. Using the inherent heat of the water from the Odenbels, the farmers expand on the natural “oasis” of life that grows around the spring by pouring water on the ground at regular intervals. They have managed to expand the fertile growing area to about a third of a stral in each direction of the spring, and for about a stral downstream. Beyond this, the water becomes too cold to do much good, and the streams that are created by the Odenbels are frozen over and too hard to get at. In these Odenbellugs, the Remusians grow many of the vegetables that they use to flavour their meals of mostly meat and fish
If one of these Odenbellugs become "infested with Monh-rum, how do the Remusian's react to this?  How often has this happened?

Diet
An adult Monh-Rum's diet consists mostly of various fish, but they have been seen eating numerous small mammals, including the hrugchuck mouse, rheeah, pinnip seals and the young of various other mammals. Their strong jaws allow them to eat even the hard-shelled flyer crab. Though its not common, particularly large specimen have been known to feed on orcs and humans of the Ice Tribes. Monh-Rum in the earlier stages of their development seem to be completely herbivorous, consuming only the hardy moss found in Iceland lakes.

Behavior
The Monh-Rum's temperament and behavior seem to vary wildly depending on whether the beast is on land or in water. This probably has a lot to do with its vastly reduced mobility outside of an aquatic environment. For this reason, the Monh-Rum never strays more than a few peds from water. Only during the short summer does the Monh-Rum leave the confines of the water, though it is unclear as to why exactly the usually water-based creature does this.

As noted before, the Monh-Rum spends the vast majority of its time in the Gotgavnynn network of hot springs that spread throughout the Iceland's coast. Due to the nature of the underground network, this means that the beast is very rarely encountered and its habits are not often seen. However, it can be found in some of the few hot pools formed by the Gotgavnynn network that have tunnel entrances large enough to accommodate the sizable salamander. It is more commonly seen in the larger lakes and ocean. In these aquatic environments the Monh-Rum is very aggressive, attacking would-be prey with abandon. This includes any orcs or members of the Ice Tribes that may be in the water. For this reason, new hot pools are viewed warily until it is determined whether the entrance is large enough for the dangerous amphibian to get through.

On land the beast is very passive, lying very still for much of the time. It is so still, in fact, that its mottled and tough skin makes it seem more akin to a rock than to a salamander.  In the description section, you describe the skin as being a solid hue with little variation.  Doesn't the meaning of mottled mean that there would be considerable variation, creating a pattern?  The two descriptions seem at odds with one another, though I think either description would work. This manner is adhered to even should potential prey venture near. However, it will attack any prey that ventures too close to the beast's mouth. It will also retreat to the water if it senses any danger from potential hunters or predators. Unfortunately due to its poor eyesight, hunters from the orc or Ice Tribes have found that sneaking up on the creature is relatively easy.

Mating
Due to the fact that the beast spends such a vast majority of its time underwater, very little is known about the Monh-Rum's mating habits. Even on the rare occasions that two creatures have been observed together on land, reports suggest that their intentions were anything but amorous. Such evidence leads one to believe that what courtship and copulation habits exist are done completely within the confines of the water.

Infant Monh-Rum are only found in the waters of the Iceland's lakes. The earlier stages of development seem to have the creature as fish-like, and gradually the Monh-Rum gains the tough skin, strong limbs and lungs of an adult. It is not entirely known how long this development takes, though judging by the long lifespan of these animals it could be quite a while indeed.

Since infant Monh-Rum have only been found in lakes, it is theorized that all egg laying is done in lakes as opposed to the Gotgavnynn network. This makes sense, since the early developmental stages of the beast are without the tough skin to protect it from the hot waters found in the hot spring network. It is also postulated that the eggs hatch early in winter since the young can only be found after the lake's surface thaws, and the infants found are already partially developed.

Uses
While the Monh-Rum is a dangerous foe, the Ice Tribes consider them a rare boon because the meat of this beast is surprisingly tender and flavorful. The head is un-edible due to the dangerous saliva, but the rest of the body is considered a delicacy and is used as a reward for brave hunters or warriors. The tough armored skin of the beast is highly prized amongst both the Ice Tribes and orcs of the Icelands. It is often woven into the furs and pelts of the tribe's most prized warrior or leader, helping to protect them against blows. The danger of the animal combined with how rare it is make these prized suits a very scarce treasure.

Using any part of the head is considered taboo by the Ice Tribes, and is thought to bring Aleshnir's ire. This taboo is so strong that even the monotheistic followers of Kor'och adhere to it, though that may be mostly due to tradition. The Rhom-oc orcs will occasionally harvest the poison, if they think they can get enough of it, and use it to coat their arrows.

Myth/Lore
The Ice Tribes consider the Monh-Rum to be favored by two gods; Aleshnir, god of sea creatures and Ertemmir, god of earth.

According to Ice Tribes mythos, in the eternal conflict between the gods, Aleshnir became jealous of Zundefor's beasts complete dominion over land. Thus, Aleshnir blessed the beast not only with the freedom to leave the water, but with the saliva that helps take down its prey. The tribes tell this story about Aleshnir's blessing:

"The Monh-Rum was once naught but a humble sea creature. But Aleshnir grew weary of Zundefor's bragging ways. He spoke often and loudly of the Aleshnir being completely unable to enter his realm for all her beasts' might. Stewing on her anger, Aleshnir then blessed the Monh-Rum with the ability to leave her watery realm, and venture forth into Zundefor's dry domain. Occasionally, one can see the beast lying on land, openly flaunting Aleshnir's defiance of Zundefor. She also blessed the beast with its poison, allowing it to defeat many of Zundefor's champions. This is why we never take the beast's head. We dare not risk the goddess' wrath in stealing the gift that gave her triumph over Zundefor."

What you have here can work, according to what is written, but 'm going to make a suggestion (yours to use or ignore as you please :))  From my readings of previous myths, etc, Ertimmer is a god who is powerful and a bit full of himself (think Zeus).  Zundefor is a smaller god, who has a bit of a mischief making streak in him (think Loki).  As well, Zundefor and Aleshnir are sometimes portrayed as lovers.  So, here is my proposal:

I would suggest that it is Ertimmer who is lording over his mastery of his domain over Aleshnir; how her lowly creatures are unable to trespass onto his earth.  Along comes the sneaky Zundefor who offers to help Aleshnir, and the two of them conceive a creature (yes, I'm suggesting the Monh-rom as a child of the two spirit gods).  Ertimmer, angry over the interference of Zundefor, and unable to do anything about the Monh-rum, then blesses the beast with poison and the ability to kill Zundefor's other creatures.

I see little in the way of editing your myth, except mainly just reversing the names of Zundefor and Ertimmer, and adding the line about the poison, etc.  But, like I said, you can keep the myth as it is, for it doesn't contravene existing canon.  This is just my opinion based on how I see the pantheon developing going forward, with each god getting their own personalities, etc.


- Turik of Barsalon

Ertemmir blessed the Monh-Rum with skin like stone so that it might brave the waters of the Gotgavnynn, widely held to be blessed by the god of fire, Peierjon. This mockery was made to revenge some slight against Ertemmir for which the god of fire was responsible. There are conflicting reports as to what this could have been, but it must have been after their temporary alliance against Parsis, god of ice, in their efforts to create the burning grass.

It is not entirely clear why the Ice Tribes do not view the using of the Monh-Rum's skin as a slight against the earth god like they do with its head, though a theory exists that could be that it stemmed from the Ice Tribes' aversion to the poisonous saliva. Thus, the myth of Aleshnir's wrath may have been created after the tradition of ignoring the beast's head. thumbup  I like this.




Very nice entry, Pikel.  Auried for your addition to the northern expanses. thumbup
« Last Edit: 25 June 2011, 18:35:14 by Altario Shialt-eck-Gorrin » Logged

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« Reply #16 on: 25 June 2011, 18:44:36 »

Going through the comments :)

Quote
Instead of living in the ocean, you have moved them to the hot springs.  Personally, I prefer your version, as we already have Talia's Xpptyxxyyzzyyl (sp :P) monster that lives in the ocean and comes onto land to lay eggs or something (sorry Talia, I'm too lazy to look up the actual facts buck), so having the MOnh-rum differ from this is preferable.  We'll just have to convince Arti to let us change the IT entry to reflect this change.

The Monh-Rum spends a LITTLE time in the ocean (where the Hotspring Network connects), but yeah i think we'd have to ask Arti to throw in "comes out of the hot springs" as opposed to the ocean.

Quote
The second point here is that the Gotgavnynn have not been tied to a distinct area, just generally to the Icelands Coast.  I would suggest that we expand this to include the northern areas of the Heaths of Wilderon.  North of the Gathorn Mountains, in Iceland Coast proper, you would find few orcs.  Too many orc ice tribe wars over the years.  South of the Gathorns, in the HoW are where nomadic orcs are found.  More opportunity for lakes in this area as well, for noth of the Gathorns is perma ice for the most part.  Doing this, you get to use the camoflauge properties of the skin as well.  A grey creature sunning itself on a white snow covered field doesn't exactly blend :P  Though, by all means, keep it north of the Gathorns as well.

EDIT: Yes. I'll edit to hint at the gotgavnynn network spreading a bit south of the Gathorns.

Quote
If one of these Odenbellugs become "infested with Monh-rum, how do the Remusian's react to this?  How often has this happened?

Well. an "infested" hot spring would probably just have one or two of the beasts (the young live in the larger colder lakes). The creature is incredibly rare, so i doubt it happens very often. Though when it does, the meat and skin of the creature would cause hunters to be rallied to bring it down as fast as possible, since i'd think the tribe's would consider the beast a boon for its bounty. EDIT: This is mentioned in the usages section of the entry. If you'd like it to be more clear, just ask :)
Quote
In the description section, you describe the skin as being a solid hue with little variation.  Doesn't the meaning of mottled mean that there would be considerable variation, creating a pattern?  The two descriptions seem at odds with one another, though I think either description would work.

This is my fault. I worked on this entry very erratically, and it evolved as i was writing it. I didn't catch all the changes i did and this one slipped through. I'll fix it.

Quote
What you have here can work, according to what is written, but 'm going to make a suggestion (yours to use or ignore as you please :))  From my readings of previous myths, etc, Ertimmer is a god who is powerful and a bit full of himself (think Zeus).  Zundefor is a smaller god, who has a bit of a mischief making streak in him (think Loki).  As well, Zundefor and Aleshnir are sometimes portrayed as lovers.  So, here is my proposal:

I would suggest that it is Ertimmer who is lording over his mastery of his domain over Aleshnir; how her lowly creatures are unable to trespass onto his earth.  Along comes the sneaky Zundefor who offers to help Aleshnir, and the two of them conceive a creature (yes, I'm suggesting the Monh-rom as a child of the two spirit gods).  Ertimmer, angry over the interference of Zundefor, and unable to do anything about the Monh-rum, then blesses the beast with poison and the ability to kill Zundefor's other creatures.

I see little in the way of editing your myth, except mainly just reversing the names of Zundefor and Ertimmer, and adding the line about the poison, etc.  But, like I said, you can keep the myth as it is, for it doesn't contravene existing canon.  This is just my opinion based on how I see the pantheon developing going forward, with each god getting their own personalities, etc.

Your Myth > My myth. I will gladly incorporate this :D

Thanks for the insights and help Altario :) I'll be updating this entry over the weekend and it should be ready for the next update!

« Last Edit: 25 June 2011, 19:06:13 by Pikel » Logged

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« Reply #17 on: 25 June 2011, 18:45:08 »

Ok, if you can update the entry today, Pikel, I can still include it!
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« Reply #18 on: 25 June 2011, 18:45:57 »

I'll be fast about it! Thanks Art! and did you see the comment about the Ice Tribes Entry being slightly modified?
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« Reply #19 on: 25 June 2011, 19:08:07 »

All comments / Questions should be acknowledged, incorporated, and/or answered. Waiting on Altario to check through his questions, my (edited) comments, and give the approval :D
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Altario Shialt-eck-Gorrin
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« Reply #20 on: 25 June 2011, 19:20:00 »

Go Art, go.

Update this, so that my staying up til 4AM to fullfill my promise is worth it. :P

 Great work, Pikel.
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« Reply #21 on: 25 June 2011, 20:46:21 »

Okeydokey, will do!  thumbup
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