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Author Topic: Bolger Ference  (Read 1629 times)
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Winlok
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« on: 22 February 2003, 18:48:00 »

I've integrated two entries from one...I hope it works :)

Overview of Bolger Ference
A human descendent to the legendary Dragon Slayers, Bolger Ference was born in 9527b.s. His mother was a poor barmaid in the local town of Lunin. And then called The Flying Star, she served more then ale out of what she called a necessity. Nine months after meeting a drunken sailor (a third cousin of)  Eckra the Cruel, in the port town of Tyrling where his mother had just moved, Bolger the Foreseer as he was later to be called, was greeted to a chaotic world.  
Appearance

With the passing of time, and his rebellious ways while still a youth when growing up. His skin became creased and ravaged with the passing of time. He wore a simple leather tunic, which provided little protection. But a frequent adaptation later learned from the Rhom-Oc Orcs, was to dip the leather tunics in boiling water for a brief period of time to make them hard but still retaining there suppleness. Often his comrades would dip the leather for a longer period of time to make them harder, and wear them underneath. Not to popular of an undertaking as it made them very brittle, and they would easily crack. However, there is little room for argument, as some protection is better then none. Bolger unlike the rest of the citizens of Lunin wore a suit of light mythril chain underneath, relying heavily on his reflexes. A gift he received from the Lord of The Injerín Elvesduring the War of the Chosen 9500-9000 b.s. when at the age of 27 he saved his daughter. Despite his age at the time of this picture, he still had the fires of youth in his eyes and was always on the alert for trouble. That is not to say he was troublesome, but trouble seemed to always find him.  
BIOGRAPHY
Bolger Ference’s first claim to fame came completely by accident. All that is really known is he saved the daughter of the Lord of Injerín Elves during the War of the Chosen. How this was accomplished, still remains a mystery. His second claim to fame was a short career as leader of the dragon slayers.  (9500-9474b.s.) He was hanged for treason in 9474, when he tried to use his own troops to overthrow a factor member of the dragon slayers.

(9527b.s.) Bolger Ference is born

(9500b.s.) Saves Injerín Elf Tribes Daughter in The War of the Chosen.

(9483b.s.) Raises the glory of the status of the (kaeer’óót’chén) dragon slayers.

(9482b.s.) Is honored by dragon slayers and gains elderly status as member of tribe.

(9474b.s.) Is hanged for treason in a failed attempt to overthrow the leadership of dragon slayer faction.

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Artimidor Federkiel
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« Reply #1 on: 26 February 2003, 14:46:00 »

Good to see this wonderful picture being integrated properly into the Dream, though the entry still needs some work as it is now:

1. First I'd put the paragraph you've written in the Overview into the biography section, especially the whole thing about his birth. This isn't really necessary in the overview, but fits much better into the bio.

2. The Overview should mention in short words what this guy is famous for and why etc. To make the guy even more interesting I'd say, we could perhaps make him an important figure from a novel. Let's say someone wrote a novel about him and his destiny based on historical facts, and this novel became very famous. You could perhaps write that the novel serves as a perfect example on a character's development or something and maybe elaborate this idea a bit further. I'd also suggest that this novel was also illustrated by one of the most proficient Santharian artists alive, the famous Faugar, so that would explain why we have this wonderful picture of a guy long dead. And we'd have a nice link to another Compendium entry.

3. In the Appearance part you mention various things which are quite impossible to put into an entry of a person long dead. Except you take this as a description from the novel I mentioned. This could work very well I think.

4. Biography: We know not enough about his environment and his the dragon slayers. I suggest to give a few more descriptions in which circumstances he lives in: the kingdom he lives in, the War of the Chosen, what kind of group the dragon slayers are etc. - this would help a lot to make the character more understandable. More detail is alway appreciated at the Biography section. A small table with the most important dates could be added after the main narrative concerning his life. See e.g. the Greybark entry for a very good example on how to do things.

5. Importance: The importance part is missing. If you go with the novel idea, you could put in here why the novel and thus Bolger as a person is so important. I guess you have good possibilities here to expand.


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"Between the mind that plans and the hands that build there must be a mediator, and this must be the heart." -- Maria (Metropolis)
Artimidor Federkiel
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« Reply #2 on: 13 March 2003, 17:23:00 »

*knock* *knock* Still alive, Winlok?


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"Between the mind that plans and the hands that build there must be a mediator, and this must be the heart." -- Maria (Metropolis)
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